Adam and Colin sat in the first-class bar, sipping at a glass of expensive champagne that was entirely lost on both of them.
‘Are you supposed to just know if it’s good or not?’ Adam asked. ‘Tastes like paint stripper to me.’
‘Not sure,’ Colin replied, looking at the bubbles fizzing in the glass. ‘Probably. I mean, not everyone can go to wine school or whatever it’s called.’
‘Maybe our taste buds have been wiped away from all the coke and crisps we’ve eaten.’
‘Aye, or maybe we’re just not cultured enough to appreciate the intricacies of such fancy drinks.’
‘I barely know what the word intricacies means, so you’re probably right.’
They clinked glasses anyway and downed the rest of the contents, much to the horror of an elderly couple who were watching on from a nearby table.
‘So, what do you reckon then?’ Colin asked.
‘About Tex?’
‘Aye.’
‘Well, it seems pretty cut and dried. It looks like he’s going to save the stolen painting for a more exclusive gallery in Venice, who can pay bigger bucks and who can probably provide a little more discretion.’
‘But what if the painting he told Muñoz about wasn’t the stolen one? It’s just a better one than the one he sold in Lisbon.’
‘The old man said that Tex told him that he’d recently come into contact with it,’ Adam shrugged.
‘That could’ve been a week before he boarded the ship.’
‘So, what are you suggesting?’
‘I think we should assume that Tex has the painting, and alert the Venetian authorities when we get a bit closer so that they can apprehend him upon arrival,’ Colin said. ‘However, I also think we should also make sure that we don’t put all our chickens in one basket…’
‘Eggs,’ Adam interjected.
‘Huh?’
‘You put eggs in a basket, not chickens.’
‘Is that what I said?’ Colin laughed. ‘Well, whatever nonsense I’m talking still stands. We focus on Tex, but make sure we keep an eye on the others too.’
‘Why don’t we just go all-out on Tex? Barge into his room, find the painting and all this ends.’
‘Because you told me that you were supposed to be staying out of trouble,’ Colin said. ‘So, let’s leave it to the authorities, who will catch him red-handed when he is trying to get off the boat with stolen goods. Meanwhile, let’s try to enjoy ourselves.’
At that moment, the door to the bar flew open and in walked a smouldering Vaughn McClusky. He marched up to the bar and ordered a large glass of expensive whisky, before stalking off to a table near the back of the room where he sat with his head in his hands, long fingers scratching at his scalp.
‘He looks troubled,’ Adam said.
‘Maybe we should go and lend a sympathetic ear,’ Colin suggested.
‘To the star of such hits as Dead In The Grave, Maximum Extermination and I’ll Be Back Before I’m Dead?’
‘Is that seriously the name of his biggest films?’
‘Yeah.’
‘No wonder he’s not hit the big time yet!’ Colin laughed. ‘All I’m saying is, remember what we said about keeping our options open? You never know, he could have the painting safely stowed away in his room. This performance he’s putting on could be a sign of guilt.’
‘He’s an actor, dumbass. If he’d stolen the painting, he’d be acting like he hadn’t.’
‘Could be double-bluffing.’
‘You’re an idiot,’ Adam said. ‘I know you want to help the old lady, so do I, but Vaughn is not our man. Though, because I’m a nosey so and so, I do want to know what’s upset him.’
‘Me too,’ Colin said. ‘Let’s go.’
They picked up their drinks and sauntered across the room. As they approached him, Adam gazed at the actor’s tailored blazer and fitted chinos, and wondered what it would be like to have enough money that nothing would ever be a worry again.
He asked Colin, who shrugged.
‘Your worries become different, don’t they?’ he said, sagely. ‘Instead of stressing about your next pay packet or mortgage payment, you probably start worrying about a stray grey hair or a deepening wrinkle. Show Business is a fickle game.’
‘Goodness. I didn’t realise I was talking to Aristotle!’
‘I’m a font of knowledge,’ Colin said. ‘You should ask me big philosophical questions more often.’
‘Will I ever be truly happy?’ Adam asked.
‘For a while next Saturday, aye, but then after that, naw. It’s all downhill from the alter, my friend.’
They laughed as they weaved through the tables, though stopped as they came to Vaughn’s. When he looked up, Adam noticed a vein popping in his forehead and blotchy marks under his eyes.
‘Can I help you?’ he asked.
‘We were at the table with you the other night for dinner. Adam and Colin,’ Adam said, waving his hands as a children’s television presenter might, feeling like a prize idiot.
Colin grimaced, and took over. ‘May we join you?’
Vaughn looked like he wanted to say no, but was probably imagining the headlines in Heat and The Daily Fail if a guest who was sitting close by ratted him out for not having time for his fans.
‘Please, do,’ he said, motioning to the seats.
‘Quite a ship, eh?’ Adam said.
‘Yeah, it’s big alright.’
‘I’ve gotta say, I loved you in He’s Behind You. It’s about time the comedy detective genre was started up again, and you are the perfect man to get it going.’
‘Thank you,’ Vaughn said, graciously.
‘Any plans for a sequel?’
‘There’s some talk of one, yes, but you never know in this business.’
‘And what are you working on at the minute?’ Adam asked.
‘Well, I’m between projects, but I’m heading to Venice to have a chat with a producer about something big. Could be the one that takes me to the next level.’
‘That’s cool,’ said Colin, trying to counteract Adam’s over-the-topness by going the other way. ‘You don’t seem overly pumped by it. Is everything okay?’
‘It will be. Hopefully. As with everything in this business, nothing is ever done until it’s on a cinema screen. Right up until that moment, nothing is certain. Take this one, for example. The guy I’m going to meet thinks we have the funding to get started within the next three months. We have the hottest script in town, we have a director who has just won the best newcomer at Cannes, we’ve got a location with tax breaks. We have it all.’
‘Except?’
Just then, Vaughn’s phone beeped, and he instinctively reached a hand into his jacket pocket. From it, he produced one of those pill boxes that separate medication into days or doses, and popped two circular tablets from today’s section. He threw them in his mouth and washed them down with the whisky.
‘Probably a no-no,’ he laughed. ‘Sorry about that. What was I saying?’
‘You were about to tell us why your next project isn’t set in stone.’
‘Oh yeah. We have it all, except the backing. The guy who was putting the money up dropped out this morning. He has “reservations”, apparently,’ Vaughn said, using his hands to make air quotes.
‘And it can’t get made unless he’s on board?’
‘Well, not necessarily him, but someone with money. We’re talking multi-millions here. Not pocket money.’ He took a hearty slug from his glass and wiped his top lip. ‘I woke up this morning so bloody excited, and then he phoned. It’s a soul-destroying business.’
‘Something will come up, surely,’ Colin smiled. ‘Like you say, all the other pieces of the jigsaw are in place. Keep the faith.’
Vaughn smiled sincerely for the first time since they’d sat down. He reached out his hand and Colin shook it.
‘You ever thought about going into life coaching?’ Vaughn laughed. ‘You’d make a bloody fortune in LA. Half the town would pay you a small fortune for the little pep talk you just gave me.’
‘Now there’s an idea,’ Colin chuckled. ‘Look, we’ve taken up enough of your time. We’ll leave you to it.’
Vaughn thanked them, and as they walked away, he shouted after Adam.
‘You’re a fan, right?’
‘Yeah.’
‘I’m sorry for being a grump. Tomorrow night, let’s have a proper drink and I’ll be less of a dick. I promise.’
Adam nodded as casually as he could, but practically skipped from the room as soon as he was out of sight of the actor.