Changing Illogical Thinking

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A week later and a couple of days after Aleesha had returned to California, she had a doctor’s appointment to find out the sex of her baby. She dropped the twins off with her mom and then drove to Lala’s house in Upland. To Aleesha’s surprise, Kiara was there when she got there. She and Lala were in the kitchen enjoying breakfast when Aleesha joined them.

“Hey Kiki,” Aleesha exclaimed as she exchanged a quick hug with her then Lala.

“Good morning Aleesha,” Kiara happily greeted back. “How’s the baby treating you?”

Aleesha took a seat at the table. “Horrible. He had me throwing up this morning,” she said with a pout.

“He?” Lala and Kiara asked together.

“Yes, he. I’ve been having dreams that it’s a boy,” Aleesha said, looking down at her stomach as she lovingly rubbed it.

“Well, you’ll find out for sure today,” Lala happily exclaimed.

“I know,” Aleesha said as she looked back up at Lala. “I thought you were going to be ready best friend?”

“I am. Come on,” Lala said, motioning for her to stand up. Lala went around the table and kissed and hugged Kiara goodbye, then the two ladies were out the door.

Lala decided to drive the two around, so they got into her Lexus and did some shopping since the appointment wasn’t until noon. They stopped at multiple stores and got Aleesha a few maternity clothes. After they were done, they were both a little hungry so the rode around until they agreed on a place that had a drive thru. They decided on Baker’s, and even though it was a few cars before them in line, they knew the wait would be worth it.

“When do you want to start planning your baby shower?” Lala asked after pulling up behind a car.

“I’m not having a baby shower because I’m not pregnant,” Aleesha casually stated.

“Why are you still trying to hide this shit?” Lala heatedly asked.

Aleesha looked at her like she was crazy. “I’m not hiding anything because you’re having the baby.”

“Here we go,” Lala murmured as she rolled her eyes.

“What do you mean here we go?” Aleesha asked, confused.

“Nothing,” Lala said, shaking her head.

“Well, I already told Savage that I want to go to Cuba to meet my grandparents and that I’ll be out there for a few months. He’s going to be busy finishing up Asaru’s mixtape and the project he’s working on with Vontrell by then, and he already told me he won’t be able to be flying back and forth, so I don’t have to worry about seeing him. I already have a little apartment rented out in Barstow and I’m going to stay out there until I have the baby.”

Lala looked at her with complete shock. “Aleesha, you’re serious about this shit?”

“Yes,” Aleesha answered with seriousness in her eyes.

“Why don’t you just tell Savage that you’re pregnant?” Lala asked with a puzzled look on her face. “You don’t even know if the baby is his or not. And even if it isn’t, no one will suspect it.”

“I can’t do that Lala,” Aleesha sadly answered.

“So you’d rather abandon your baby?”

“I’m not abandoning him! You’re acting like I’m giving him away to a fucking stranger!” Aleesha yelled, fighting back her tears.

“I’m sorry,” Lala apologized. “I didn’t mean to come off offensive,” she said, softening her voice. “But think about what you’re really doing, Aleesha. Ultimately the decision is between your child and your husband. And I know it’s hard but your child is a piece of you, and I know you won’t be able to just sit back and watch me raise it.”

“I know,” Aleesha said, shaking her head as tears began to fall from her eyes. “I’ve never thought about no shit like this, I love this child already,” she said, beginning to rub her stomach. “I’m just scared of what Savage will do if the baby isn’t his.”

“Why? The most he can do is leave you?”

“What if he flips out and goes crazy?” Aleesha asked, looking fearfully into Lala’s eyes. “He never put his hands on me until that night and who knows what he will do when he finds out the truth isn’t what it’s supposed to be.”

“How would he find out?”

“Lala, Savage and Cali look nothing alike. Not their skin tone, facial structure, body type, nothing. They both have strong ass genes and I know my child will look like its father.”

“Well, get a DNA test first,” Lala advised. “Then you can worry about all the extras later. They have a few prenatal ones.” 

“I don’t know why I didn’t think of that,” Aleesha said as a lightbulb went off in her head.

They pulled up to place their order and Lala rolled down the window. “What do you want?” she asked Aleesha while looking at the menu.

“A papa meal number one with a raspberry ice tea,” Aleesha said, getting her phone out. She began looking up clinics that offered prenatal paternity testing and once she found one she called it. She was able to schedule an appointment before their meal was ready.

“Okay, I made the appointment for tomorrow,” she said to Lala once she was off the phone.

“So I’m guessing you’re going to find out if it’s Cali’s first?”

“Yeah,” Aleesha said, shaking her head. “If it’s not Savage’s at least I’ll have time to muster up the strength to tell him that the baby is Cali’s.”

“Okay, so I’m not going to be a pretend mommy anymore?” Lala enthusiastically asked.

“No hoe,” Aleesha said with a slight laugh.

“Thank you, Jesus,” Lala said, raising her hands in praise. “I’m glad you came to your senses,” she said, looking back at Aleesha.

“Me too,” Aleesha said with relief. “Now, let’s go find out what I’m having.”

After getting their food, Lala drove Aleesha to her doctor’s appointment. She had to wait over an hour, but she was finally seen by the doctor. She found out she was having a boy like she hoped and got excited. Once they left the doctors, Aleesha knew she had to call Savage and at least tell him that she was pregnant. She was really scared to lose him if the truth wasn’t what she wanted it to be, but nothing in the world mattered more to her than her children. She couldn’t believe she even thought of giving her child up, even if it was to her best friend.

They arrived at Lala’s, and Aleesha decided now was the best time to call her husband. She stayed inside the car and Lala went inside her house to give her privacy. Guilt overcame Aleesha as she scrolled through her contacts to her husband’s name. She clicked the phone icon next to his name, and the phone began calling him. It rang until it went to voicemail. Aleesha hung up the phone and called him back two more times, but she still didn’t get an answer so she decided to give Cali a call. As soon as she called him, the call went to voicemail. Just as she was getting ready to give up and go inside, her phone began ringing and it was Savage.

Aleesha was hesitant to pick it up, but she did after about ten seconds. “Hey babe,” she said into the phone as she answered it.

“How you doin’ mommy?”

“Okay,” she woefully answered.

Savage sensed the tone of her voice. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Leelee, what’s wrong?”

Aleesha let out a huge sigh. “I’m pregnant.”

“Why you sound sad about it?”

“I’m not, it just came at an unexpected time. I thought the twins would be a little older but I can’t wait to have another baby,” Aleesha said, trying to put more excitement in her voice.

“Well, we might as well start getting ‘em out the way now,” Savage reasoned. “How far along are you?”

“I’m 15 weeks.”

“Damn, and I’m just now finding out once again, huh?” he heatedly asked.

“Savage, I just found out,” she lied. “I went in for a checkup and didn’t realize how long it was since I had my last period until the doctor asked. Next thing I knew he was telling me I’m pregnant. But at least I know the sex of the baby.”

“What are we having?” he excitedly asked.

“I’m having a boy.”

“Another lil’ me, huh? Damn that’s crazy.”

“I know right,” Aleesha replied feebly. “But babe I’m about to go talk to Lala. I just wanted to tell you the good news.”

“Okay mommy, call me before you put the kids to sleep so I can tell them goodnight.”

“Okay. I love you Najair.”

“I love you too Aleesha.”

Aleesha felt so much guilt having to constantly lie to her husband. She was really hoping she would never have to tell him what she was about to have to do. She tried calling Cali again and got sent straight to voicemail, so she knew she had no other choice but to call Milasia.

They talked for a few minutes before Aleesha asked her to call Cali. She told Milasia to tell him to call her and Milasia agreed so Aleesha ended the phone call. A few minutes later, her phone started ringing and Cali’s name appeared on the screen. She immediately answered it. “Hey, Cali.”

“Yeah, cuh?” he viciously asked.

“Damn, what’s wrong with you?” she asked, sensing the aggression in his voice.

“Ain’t shit wrong wit’ me,” he blankly stated.

“You don’t have to cuss at me.”

“Cuh, what do you want?” he snapped.

“Why are you being so rude?” she asked, hurt by how unkind he was being.

“You wanted me outta yo life remember, and that’s where the fuck I’m tryna stay. What did you need to talk to me about now? What, you miss me? You wanna try to hang out and be friends again?” he mimicked. “I’m not no lil’ ass kid to keep tryna play games with.”

“Cali, I’m pregnant,” she regretfully stated.

“So. What the fuck you telling me for?”

“Because the baby might be yours,” she straightforwardly professed.

There was a long pause on the phone. Cali couldn’t believe what he just heard. “What?” he asked, needing her to clarify what she just told him.

“I’m 15 weeks pregnant and there’s a possibility that the child is yours.”

“Aleesha, cuh,” he said in disbelief.

“Cali, I’m not trying to play no games with you,” she honestly vowed. “My husband already knows that I’m pregnant and I don’t want to let him think it’s his and it isn’t. I need you to go to this clinic with me for a prenatal blood test. It’s already scheduled for tomorrow.”

“Where’s it at?”

Aleesha gave Cali the address and after ending the call, she went inside and told Lala she was leaving. They parted with a few words and Aleesha was on her way to pick up her kids. Then she drove home, relaxed with them for the rest of the day and called it an early night.

The next morning, Aleesha was nervous about going to the clinic, but she knew it was something she had to do. She fed herself and her children then they all got dressed. An hour later, they were on their way to the clinic. Cali met her there and they were almost in and out in an instance. The doctor took some of both of their blood, and sent them on their way. The results wouldn’t come for five days, so Aleesha and Cali planned to meet back there when the results were in. They said an awkward goodbye, then went their separate ways.