Chapter 14A Week Off

There was a soft knock on the door and their mother stepped in.

“Issy, can you go help your father? I’d like to speak to your sister alone, please.”

Issy glanced at Luna, her eyebrows raised. She stood up and walked past her mother, pausing to kiss her on the cheek and murmur “go easy on her” before she left the room.

Luna’s mother looked tired. She sat on the bed and reached over to Luna, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. That small gesture filled her eyes with tears. She fell into her mother’s arms and cried. Her mom rocked her gently, stroking her hair and hushing her.

“I’m so sorry, Mom,” sobbed Luna, as if her heart was breaking.

“Oh, Luna, I’m not mad at you.” Her mother pulled her up to look into her eyes, her face filled with sorrow. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that. That you were attacked by that boy.” Her face turned angry. “I wish you’d tell me who it was. He shouldn’t get away with it, Luna. Not with the attack and not with your pregnancy.”

“I can’t, Mom. If I report it, I’ll have to go to court. Do you know what they do to girls like me in court?”

Her mother shrugged.

“They call them whores. They tell them that they were asking for it. That they shouldn’t have dressed the way they dressed. That they deserved it. I can’t.”

“I’m trying to respect that. But I want you to know something. I don’t blame you. You’re the victim here, Luna. What happened to you wasn’t your fault. You didn’t deserve it. You know that, right?”

Luna nodded.

“I know. But everyone knows I’m pregnant now. They’re going to be talking about me.”

Her mother lifted her chin.

“Let them. But Luna . . . you shouldn’t be the one responsible for his actions. Not for people talking and not for this child. Have you thought about what you want to do when the baby is born?”

Luna shook her head. “I’m not sure. I’ve spent so long trying to hide it that I haven’t really sat down and thought about what happens next.”

Her mother nodded. “Then we have to start thinking about it. Together.”

“I know.”

Her mom hugged her again.

“And I know you don’t want to say who the father is . . . but please consider telling me. Let me help you. You wouldn’t have to face him alone, Luna. Now there’s four of us.”

Luna rubbed her stomach. “Five,” she said.

Her mother smiled sadly.

“Yes. Now we’re five.”

***

The rest of the week passed in a blur. Luna spent most of it doing her homework, taking long walks along the river by herself, and reading a book that her mother had bought for her, called What to Expect When You’re Expecting. It was fascinating. She could see what her baby looked like week-by-week and read about how it was developing. She was almost six months pregnant. Nearly into her third trimester and she had missed so much!

“Did you know the baby can grab things?” she asked Issy. Issy looked up from her book.

“Seriously? Like what?”

Luna flipped a page.

“It doesn’t say. But if there was something there in front of him, he could grab it.”

“He?”

Luna blushed.

“I don’t like calling the baby ‘it.’ He feels like a boy.”

“Have you felt him move?” Issy asked, reaching out to touch Luna’s belly.

She shook her head.

“I don’t think so. I mean, maybe. But it’s more like fluttering, so I’m not really sure.” She looked down at her book again. “He has tiny little fingernails now. Isn’t that amazing?”

“Wait . . . he didn’t always have fingernails?” Issy peered at the illustration in the book.

“Nope,” Luna smiled. “He has eyelids and eyebrows now too. He’s like a little person in there.” She rubbed her belly, smiling softly.

Issy watched her, frowning.

“So . . . Luna . . . are you thinking of keeping him?”

Luna closed the book and sighed.

“I don’t know. I didn’t know I’d be so attached to him. I can’t imagine giving him to someone else to raise. But I can’t imagine being a mother either. I had my whole life mapped out, Is. I knew where I’d go to school, what I’d study, and where I’d work. I knew when I’d get married and have kids. And it was a long time from now.” She looked pleadingly at her sister. “What do I do, Is?”

“I can’t tell you what to do with your baby, Luna. But I think you should keep it. You wouldn’t have to do it all alone. I could help. Mom and Dad could help too.”

“But, everything would change, Is. How would we afford a baby? Who’d take care of him? Dad’s store is so busy, he’s almost never home. Mom works and goes to school. You have one more year and then you’re going to university, too. It’s not fair to ask everyone to make sacrifices for me.”

“But it wouldn’t just be for you.”

“I know that. I do. But I have to look at what kind of life I could give him, Is.” She rubbed her stomach. “But Is . . . I already love him.”

“I know you do. That’s why you have to figure out what’s best for him.”

Luna nodded and tried to imagine what her life would be like with a baby. And what it would be like without him.