67

Ash

Gut’ns tish, I have conversed with a Mar. The thought stops my breath and makes my legs go weak. The sea people really do exist.

Like the headlands of Clearwater Road, the fog saturates everything, and cold doesn’t begin to define it. It dampens any distant sounds and acts like a megaphone to those nearby, the rhythmic spray of water hitting the prow, the creak of ropes and whoosh of wind through the rigging. The mainsail is down, and we run with the jib only for maneuverability. But the sloop makes good speed, which is lucky, because we need it.

Lucky also, I’m told, is that Salila, the Mar, leads us to safety. My mind spins with other possibilities. Maybe she leads us to the mouth of death, to the freezing waters of the Drop. I can’t see Kaylin but can hear him over the sounds of the ship and the sea. From time to time, Salila’s voice rings out as well. Her attitude ranges from cutting sarcasm to outright flirtation. It makes me question if Kaylin is the same man I knew this morning. The sailor who took me swimming, brought meals to our room, and explored the secrets of the ancient texts in the library of Aku. Who shared a kiss, or three… My companion who led me out of the library right before it fell? That Kaylin saved my life, and I want this version to be the same person, but it’s not clear to me if he is.

Kaylin’s all over the ship, a single man crew, calling out course corrections, trimming the sails, running up the rigging and adjusting whatever there is to tighten or loosen. He never tires, but then, he never did. That’s the same. He hurries by me now, and there it is again, a smile that isn’t quite right. And, if Kaylin is worried, there must be something catastrophic going on. A pressure in my head makes it hard to think straight, let alone talk. When Kaylin pauses next to me at the wheel, I force the words out. “She…the Mar…”

“Salila?” He modifies the heading slightly for me, though how he can see past his elbow in the fog, I don’t know. “Ask me anything you like.”

That’s willingness, but I hardly know where to begin. “She saved your life?”

“Aye.”

“When?”

His eyes grow distant. “Two turns to starboard,” he says then studies my profile. “A long time ago, Ash. I was a child.”

“Can’t have been that long ago,” I mutter. “And so, now you two are what, exactly?” I sum it up in a word that I hope is ludicrous but must be tested. “Betrothed?” The blood drains from my limbs as I wait on his answer.

A genuine laugh escapes his lips. “No, lass. Nothing like that.”

I relax, then tense again. “But she’s so provocative.”

“She’s Mar.” He shrugs as if that explains everything.

“Yet she calls you brother?”

“As I said, a Mar’s term for those they know. A familiar one.”

I chew on that and decide not to ask exactly what “know” means in this specific instance. “But you’re somehow entwined.”

“Betrothal, in any sense, is not the way of Mar.”

He’s not really answering the question. I hesitate, then whisper, “It’s not the way of Mar. I get that now, but is it your way, Kaylin?”

“It never used to be.”

He looks at me with such openness my lips part.

“Port. Half a turn. That’s it. Steady.” He’s back to being the captain.

At the risk of sounding childish, I ask one more thing. “Why didn’t you tell me about her?” I turn and face him. “You lied.”

“I withheld about Salila, but I’ve never lied.” His brow wrinkles, as if considering how to proceed. “Mar hide their bonds with landers, never wanting them to be known. It was not my secret to tell.”

“Bonds?”

He pauses and looks at me.

“Do you think you’re pushing him away yet?” my inner voice asks with a cheerful lilt.

You disappeared again!

“Other way around. It’s you who stopped hearing me.”

Right. The messy business of being under attack, the escape from Aku, the guards, the Mar…

“Maybe pay attention to the outer conversation for now?”

I realize Kaylin is talking.

“…the bond is a greater agreement, Ash,” he says. “Please forgive me if I offended you.”

Offended is not the word I’m searching for. My heart sinks under his formality, and heat stings my face. I change paths. “There are more lander-Mar bonds that you know of?”

“It’s rare.” His eyes melt into mine. “But I believe so, yes,” he whispers. “I hope so.”

I fall into the softness of his voice, for a moment, before breaking the spell. “You speak in riddles, Kaylin of Tutapa,” I turn back to the fog, which is all there is to look at, and stare straight ahead.

He places his hand over mine as I grip the wheel. “I was asked to keep a confidence, an extraordinary one, and I did.”

“Fair enough. But it’s out now, this relationship you have with her. It’s out that Mar exist beyond myth and fancy, and that changes everything. You know Jacas Adicio has called a halt to the sacrifices, saying the Mar never existed, nor did the old gods. Now people will be tossing marred children into the Drop again, to placate the likes of your disemboweling Salila.”

“Is this Teern’s plan all along?” Salila’s voice echoes.

“Maybe.” Kaylin allows. “You know the ban has left empty tombs.”

Salila laughs. “We could have been played, but then why have them all killed? There’d be no one left to report it.”

“What are you two talking about?” I press my hand to my forehead. “Who’s Teern? Who’s to be killed?”

Kaylin startles. “Teern?”

“I heard her say the name.” I look for Salila on deck. “Where is she?”

Kaylin is speechless for a moment. “Guard your thoughts, lass.” His composure returns. “When we’re safely away, I’ll explain everything. I promise.”

“Oh, Cap-i-tán?” Salila interrupts.

“There she is again.” I shake my head. Is this imagination?

“It’s not.” He presses his finger to his lips. “Keep her out of your head.”

I stagger, bracing my legs in a wider stance to stay upright. She’s in my head, too? And I’m supposed to keep her out, how?

“Can you come aft for a moment, brother, if you aren’t too busy toying with your—”

“Steady on,” Kaylin says to me. “Salila’s—”

“I know. She’s calling you. I’m not deaf! And what does she mean, toying? Is she talking about me?” I’d cross my arms and puff out my chest if they weren’t clamped onto the wheel.

“Toy…it’s a Mar word for bantering,” Kaylin says quickly before disappearing into the fog.

Somehow, I don’t think that’s precisely true, and neither do I trust that Mar is leading us to safety after all.