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"When you master your mindset, you free yourself to achieve the level of success you desire" Louis L. Hay
If you wish to create a wonderful day and keep repeating that every day on consistent basis, it is not going to be easy.
You have to consistently keep reminding yourself about your big dreams. Moreover, you have to align your daily small decisions with your dreams to engineer your dream life.
It is possible. The goal of this chapter is to make it easier for you by suggesting some effective strategies.
Let’s jump into it directly.
Instead of adopting a “PUSH” strategy, where you have to force yourself towards a particular direction, you should use a “PULL” strategy.
The “Pull” strategy will on its own pull or attract you towards your desired goals.
But, there is a catch.
Our entire lives are already ‘defined’ (by us only, though unconsciously, I will explain it a bit later) by the people surrounding us i.e. our parents, siblings, other family members, neighborhood, friends, local acquaintances etc.
Also, all of us have grown up in different life circumstances, varied cultures, lifestyles, a certain set of religious or spiritual beliefs etc.
So our mind is already biased, defined (or rather say ‘brainwashed’) to think as the people around us do and as the local circumstances allow us to believe. Because you already know:
“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with”. ~ Jim Rohn
So you may relate to below general thought patterns in the mind:
- It is okay to follow the traditional path i.e go to school, college, get good grades, get a decent job and then continue until retirement the same life.
- What is the harm in doing the way, it has been done in my family and circle.
- I tried it once earlier and it didn’t work, so no use of putting in further efforts again.
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HOWEVER, IF YOU ARE thinking to engineer your dream life (undoubtedly true, because you are reading this book) and intend to master your days, the abovesaid thought pattern will hold you back again and again.
You will move one step further and then two steps backwards.
Results?
Obviously, no results, rather you are regressing.
Secondly, more dangerous repercussion is that you would start second guessing and self-doubting yourself.
And that’s why they say:
“Surround yourself with people, whose definition of you is not based on your history, but your destiny”. ~ T.D. Jakes
You would have noted that with the current belief pattern, you have to really ‘push’ hard to make things move.
Believe me, it is not sustainable, because you are not equipped with the right mindset to cope up with the ongoing challenges, the life poses on your way.
So let’s talk about the “Pull” Strategy.
As the name suggest, it involves literally creating certain different neuro-pathways in your brain. Such neuro-pathways will help you to attract or pull you to do the necessary actions needed to achieve your results, instead of holding you back towards the preset traditional beliefs instilled from your circumstances.
So let’s apply the 80:20 principal, which I have already explained in greater detail in my first book “The 30 Hour Day- Develop Achievers Mindset and Habits, Work Smarter and still Create Time for Things that Matter”
If you are not familiar with this, the principal states that:
“80% of your activities results into only 20% results and most importantly, 20% of your activities results into 80% of your results in life.”
And you will find ample examples of this in life, if you look around. (If you are interested to explore it further, refer to my book “The 30 Hour Day”)
So coming to the key point!
The 20% activity i.e. most significant activity is to work on your mindset.
This activity will give you the 80% result i.e. creating a pull strategy to attract you towards right actions needed for crafting your day and achieving your goals.
In the rest of this chapter, I will explain what are those super effective mindsets and some practical tips to inculcate those mindsets to operate your awaking life.
Precisely, following are the mindset, which are very much necessary for your journey towards winning your each day.
"Life is 10% of what Happens to Me and 90% of How I React to It" –John Maxwell
Each of us comes across different adverse situations or circumstances in life on a daily basis. How we react to these problems is in our hands in most of the cases.
Some people see the problems as devastating and get themselves frozen in that situation. And the result is very much obvious. They don’t take any action on it.
While in similar circumstances, the other set of people take the same problem as an opportunity to learn and evolve. They take it as a challenge to overcome. They know it very well that overcoming the said problem will help them evolve and transform them in to a better version of themselves.
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing” ~Theodore Roosevelt
Therefore, the successful people never see the problem as a problem, rather they see that as an opportunity. In fact, they go out and seek the problems to resolve for the rest of the world.
In the world, where most of the people are trying to escape from the problems, they embrace the adverse situations or circumstances of life with open arms.
As someone has rightly stated that there is no problem, when you are lying in the coffin, so go ahead and take risks till you are alive.
The world needs people, who are focused towards providing the solutions. And those who come forward are immensely rewarded.
The history is filled with examples of successful people in all fields of life, who have buckled up to resolve the problems. It is really a win-win proposition for such people and the world around.
While on the one hand, the world gets a solution to the problem, the persons who have come out with the solutions are generally rewarded in terms of name, fame, wealth. The top most reward for such persons is a sense of deeper sense of fulfillment. Ultimately, only those people are happy, who have got a sense of fulfillment in their life.
So now we know how this mindset will help us to look at the adverse situation, so there is no better time to cultivate this mindset.
Following are really helpful strategies to develop a solution oriented mindset.
Look around you at the same things or situations, which before that you would have thought of as a problem. Think over it again. You will always have only two type of circumstances.
So next time, you come across any situation, which seems like a problem, the first observation you need to do is to ascertain whether this is ‘controllable’ or ‘uncontrollable.
If it is controllable, your first reaction should be to take whatever possible action comes to your mind basis you best judgment. Make sure that you take quicker action and don’t’ get into lengthy ‘paralysis by analysis’ syndrome.
However, if there is something, which is totally beyond your control, then you need to teach our emotions to behave sensibly. If you can’t do anything about it, then you must not let your feelings and emotions wander negatively and creating more problems for you. Rather you should try to focus your attention on other positive things in life and keep moving on.
At the end of day, we all are human beings, not God. There is some bigger power operating behind the scenes, which we often forget, thanks to blurred vision due to thought clouds.
The “Serenity prayer” is very helpful tool in such situations. Pray to God:
“God, Grant me the:
- serenity to accept the things, which I can’t change;
- Courage to change the things, I can; and
- Wisdom to know the difference between the two”
Don’t allow your mind at all to complain over any situation. Complaining over things simply means giving the responsibility of your feelings and emotions to someone else.
I am not advocating that you should not hold someone accountable for not doing certain things, which he or she was supposed to do. Please be vocal and tell the person about his or her responsibility. But stop there. Don’t over think and let you mind start feeling negative emotions. Keep in mind, only you are the master of your feelings and emotions and no body else.
“Stop giving people the power to steal your peace. It belongs to you and no one should be able to run away with it” ~ A. Elle
Don’t waste your time with people, who merely keep talking about the problem. Try to avoid them at the very first place, if possible or if you can’t avoid them, then use “CTT Technique”.
CTT stands for “Change The Topic”. If you want to avoid such discussions, which spreads negativity and you can’t avoid it, then you have to subtly introduce CTT technique i.e. without anyone noticing change the discussion subtly and bit gradually to any other healthier topic. If done well, the other person really doesn’t realize that the negative topic is replaced by a healthy discussion point. Thereby, you save your energy and time and avoid getting plagued with negative emotions.
You see, one need to be aware and conscious from moment to moment to guard our minds against negativity and develop a solution oriented mindset.
In your entourage towards crafting your desired moments day by day, the importance of “possibility thinking mindset” can’t be undermined at all.
It might seem similar to solution oriented mindset, but it is One Level Ahead.
In ‘solution oriented mindset’, you focus on solving the problems, whereas in “possibility thinking mindset”, you go to a next level and create possibilities of further improvements in diverse areas of your life.
With this mindset, you are transformed into a highly optimistic person (not talking in terms of any woowoo stuff), because your brain gets wired to only look at ‘what is next possibility’ here.
Do you understand attack mode or defense mode?
It is more prevalent in the sports though. For example, in cricket, the batsmen use different strategies depending upon and considering the opponent’s game plan. Sometime the batsman chooses to defend to save his wicket while facing another player in his best form, while at other times, when the bowler has thrown a loose ball or there is some other drawback, the player chooses to be in attack mode.
However, some of the best players seemingly are always in the “attack mode”
So the Possibility thinking mindset is like acting everytime in the attack mode while playing the game of life, making the results quite apparent i.e. a winning game.
This needs a total shift in your mindset and how you react to daily situation moment to moment.
But don’t you worry, you have to follow these tiny steps and this thinking will become your second nature in some time.
“Trust that everything happens for a reason, even when you are not wise enough to see it through” ~ Oprah Winfrey
“You miss 100% of shots, you don’t take” ~ Wayne Gretzky
If you have ever studied the principle of “Law of Attraction”, one of the important ingredients is “Speed” and the universal rule is:
Therefore, we notice that the successful people generally take decisions very speedily. But don’t think that take decisions in haste, rather they have developed this habit by consistent practice over time.
All of us have same number of hours in our days, but some people multiply their time by taking quicker actions on the stuff. This sets them free to get engaged in other important things i.e. spending time with family, friends, doing adventure stuff etc. They realize that time can’t be bought back by any amount of money in this world and thus use it judiciously.
“Take action before you are ready” ~ Richard Branson
If you have not heard about the background behind creation of Virgin Airlines, this story will definitely intrigue you.
Richard Branson (who later founded Virgin Airlines) got stuck at one airport in United States, as the flight to his destination got cancelled and the next available flight was available only on the next day.
Obviously people around him were complaining about missing the important meeting or not able to reach at some family function or any other important event. Branson was also sitting amongst them, but he took a very different action.
He was mindful of the importance of his meeting at the destination, so he took a solid action immediately.
He called up and hired a chartered plane, despite this being a very costly affair for him to travel in a private plane at that point of time in his career. Then next immediate thing, he did was to communicate to the fellow travelers around him, if any of them wish to board his private plane, but at twice the cost of regular ticket price. Most of travelers chose to pay extra and Branson was able to recover his cost for booking the chartered plane and made some money too.
This inspired him to set up Virgin Atlantic Airlines.
So you must consider taking speedy decisions in your life, at least, in smaller decisions in your days.
For example you can start taking quick decisions on small actions as stated below:
Make it a habit to take faster decisions and it will become your second nature in no time, which will make your days look better with more time to focus on other important things.
Another mindset, which is very relevant for improving the quality of your day, is the minute observation of your mind on regular basis.
You might have realized that most of the time your mind keeps on playing tricks on you.
Ever wondered, why some specific thought, which you were quite optimistic last evening, suddenly next day morning seems to be impossible and even not worth putting efforts to.
Why it is so that last evening you said “yes” to lead a project in a meeting and next day morning you feel butterflies in your stomach about taking further action. What new came in and what changed between last evening and today morning to give birth to this for a different negative feeling. All the people around are same and you have the same skillset and experience. Everything is same, but now our general thinking pattern comes in the way to make us feel that we might fail or face rejection or humiliation or all sorts of other negative thoughts.
Our old conditioning of mind and the surrounding negativity plays a vital role in all our decision.
So, all the successful people on this planet keep a constant guard on the thoughts ongoing in their heads. They continue to measure the thoughts and evaluate, if any particular thought is serving the purpose of moving them ahead in life or it is merely a fearful thought generated out of general negativity and social conditioning around.
Once you practice this mindset, you will start developing a very careful and distinction creating mind.
“The key to growth is the introduction of higher dimensions of consciousness into our awareness” ~ Lao Tzu
All the practice in life is about making fine distinctions between the two things and choosing the things, which goes as per your deeper values and objective in the life.
With the developed and more conscious mindset, you realize that any negative feeling about certain thing is merely a temporary phenomenon and will vanish, if you shine your light of consciousness over it.
“Live as if you were to die tomorrow, learn as if you were to live forever” ~ Mahatma Gandhi
The world today is ever dynamic and every moment something or the other is changing some part of the world. New technologies are being developed at laser sharp speed. The human race is eager to reach at its the top potential by leveraging all the tools and technologies available around.
So the people who enjoy a very joyful and rewarding life are the people, who keep a constant watch on the ongoing trends. They keep on enhancing their knowledge base on a continuous basis.
It is worth mentioning an anecdote here to emphasize upon the importance of the enhancing your knowledge on a regular basis.
It goes like this:
John was a poor woodcutter living in one village. He had been earning his living by cutting woods and selling in the market on a daily basis, but he was always hand to mouth. It had been going on from years.
It happened someday that another wood cutter David shifted to his village and in his neighborhood. David always seemed to be quite joyful and earning more money than him, but surprisingly by working lesser number of hours as compared to John.
John observed it for few days but couldn’t resist his curiosity longer. Finally, he thought to visit David to know his secret of success, despite being in the competing trade.
He knocked the door of his new neighbor and David welcomed him warmly. Then both started talking.
The Poor John finally asked his life saving question:
“Hey David- I have been wondering from some time now as to how do you manage to earn more money than me, while still working half of the time than myself. I am really tired of living hand to mouth for so many years. If you don’t mind, can you please help me learn the tricks.”
David said “No big secret, John. Let me show you something”.
Then David took John to his backyard and showed him the real stuff. John was amazed to see different tools lying alongwith his axe. John couldn’t understand still and asked “David, I am still not sure if I understood this fully, could you explain it further.”
David said, “Listen my friend, for every one hour of cutting woods- I sharpen my axe for 2 hours. With that sharpened axe, I am able to cut faster and more wood. With the time saved, I am able to quickly go to the market and sell my wood. It is that simple”
John realized that he hasn’t worked on sharpening his axe since long. Therefore, it took longer and very tiring and frustrating for him to cut more wood and earn money therefrom.
So the moral of story is that one needs to continuously work on sharpening one’s skill set and knowledge to cope up with the challenges in a very fast manner.
None other than great Abraham Lincoln has quoted:
“Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.”
If you observe the successful billionaires they have got this habit of reading and learning every new thing.
Warren Buffett was once asked about the key to success; he pointed to a stack of nearby books and said, “Read 500 pages like this every day. That’s how knowledge works. It builds up, like compound interest.”
Similarly Bill Gates is also known to be reading 50 books in a year, which comes out to one book per week. You can check his blog, where he is always reading something and updating his blog. https://www.gatesnotes.com/
All these great people believe in the saying:
“Never stop learning, because the life never stops teaching.”
Therefore, to craft a life of amazing success, one needs to adopt the above mindsets and keep on working on them.
But, few of you may be suffering from some negative beliefs and mindsets and want to get rid of such mindsets, while adopting the positive mindsets as stated above.
For the benefits of such readers, I had earlier jotted down certain types of negative and real culprit mindsets, which are primarily responsible to ruin your day. These are captured in my another book titled “The 30 Hour Day- Develop Achiever’s Mindset and Habits, Work Smarter and Still Create Time For Things That Matter”.
However, to supplement this chapter, I am offering the free chapter of that book below:
7 Negative Mindsets which kill productivity and How to Replace them
You will learn in this Free Chapter certain types of negative mindsets responsible to kill the productivity and goes on to explain the ways with real life example on how to replace such mindset with practical and easy to implement strategies.
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