CHAPTER NINE
Tuesday, December 29

Todd, help me here.” Becca blew out a soft sigh, taking a stab at patience, which was dwindling fast. She swiveled from her computer screen to face him fully. “You’re telling me your company is about to lay off a lot of people in your department but you won’t be among them.”

“Yes. My level is safe for now.”

“Yet this is your confirmation that we should leave life as we know it and move to Hope Springs? You can’t be serious.”

They’d been debating this since the road trip home. Todd’s meeting with the elders had made an impression and swayed him to at least begin thinking seriously about their proposition. Every day he seemed to be leaning more in favor of the move. But she’d been hanging her hopes on one thing he said he’d need—real confirmation. Given how crazy this notion was, she’d been sure he wouldn’t get it.

“I really think so, Bec.” He paced in front of her, a distressing sign, since it meant his wheels were turning. “When they told me about the layoffs today, it just clicked.” He looked at her, his green eyes twinkling.

“Clicked.” She bit her lip, nodding. “What am I missing, Todd? If your job is safe, why would you want to leave?”

He grabbed a chair from the small round table in her office and sat. “When they told me who they were laying off—including a woman who just had a baby and a guy who just bought a house—it struck me that nothing is secure in this world. We hang on to it like it’s everything, but it could be gone like that.” He snapped a finger. “I felt like God was showing me that instead of trusting in a job, I need to trust where He leads us. You know?”

“Not really.” She stared at him. “I’m not seeing why you’d quit a job—that affords us a nice living, by the way—to take a position you’ve said you’re not called to do.”

Todd nodded. “That’s the other thing God’s been showing me.”

If I hear that one more time . . .

Todd had prayed and fasted after Christmas, something she’d never seen him do, not apart from some churchwide initiative. Now every time she turned around he had something else God was showing him. And she wasn’t excited about any of it.

“I’ve been running from it, Bec, from my calling,” he continued. “Doing what’s comfortable. Maybe I feared I wouldn’t measure up to my dad and granddad. And frankly, I knew enough to know that shepherding a congregation can be one big headache after another. I didn’t want the hassle. But now . . .”

Becca didn’t necessarily want to hear the rest. She liked their life just fine before the But now.

He sighed. “I don’t know . . . I know you’re against the move. It’s not even that I’m for it. I just can’t shake it.” He leaned forward, elbows on his thighs, and looked her in the eye. “But you’re right. I’d be giving up a good salary. I’m out of my mind, aren’t I?”

“Yes. You are.” She gave him a wry smile, then sighed herself. “I don’t get what God is doing. Right when my travel ramps up, we’re talking about moving away from Mom? She’s invaluable to us. And most of my ministry opportunities are out of town now, but I still get speaking engagements in St. Louis. I would hate to leave the ministry network I’ve built here.” She felt a check inside. “And yet . . . this Calvary opportunity came out of the blue, just like Worth & Purpose. How can I say God is at work with one and not the other?”

Todd stared at her.

“What?”

“I hadn’t thought about that. For so long we’ve been plugging along, taking steps that made sense. Now this ‘out of the blue’ stuff.”

“Kind of like your message at your dad’s funeral.” He had shared it with her on the way back to St. Louis. “Be nice if ‘living full-out’ only applied to the things you’re excited about.” Becca shook her head. “But I’m sorry, I don’t think I could ever get excited about living in Hope Springs. I love our life here.”

“Sweetheart . . .” He stood and pulled her into a hug. “I love our life here too. I love our church. I love living in a city this size, with everything at our fingertips—shopping, restaurants, museums—”

“—Mom. Cable Internet.”

He laughed into her hair. “They’ve got cable Internet. Dad just didn’t have it.” He stepped back and looked her in the eye. “Moving back to the place I grew up doesn’t excite me either. But hearing from God and trusting Him on a whole new level—that’s what excites me.” He held her shoulders. “I really do think this is God, Bec. But I’d never accept Calvary’s offer without your full support.”

She walked to the window. So she could end this with a flat no? Though she wanted to say it, she found it hard. She’d never seen Todd so stirred up about anything related to job or ministry. What if he was right? What if this was God?

Or maybe it was some sort of test, God wanting to see if she was willing. But in the end the whole thing would fall through.

She turned back around. “How soon would we have to leave?”

“No telling how long it would take to sell the house in this economy,” he said. “Could be six months or more.”

A ray of hope poked its nose through. She didn’t mind the “when” stretching into the future. More time meant more opportunities to change their minds. But admittedly, the housing issue was one benefit—they’d no longer have a mortgage if they moved into Todd’s childhood home. “What would Calvary do without a pastor meanwhile?” she said.

“They were already figuring on an interim preacher while they did a search, so that wouldn’t be a problem.” He paced a little. “But this isn’t a done deal. The elders have to vote, then they recommend me to the congregation for a vote.”

Becca gave him a look. “It’s a done deal.” She swallowed, encouraging herself. Voicing support only means you’re willing. Anything can happen between now and when the house finally sells. “If you’re fully convinced this is God and thus worth the drastic reduction in income and a drastic move to Hope Springs, then I guess . . . fine.”

Todd wrapped his arms around her. “I promise you I’ll keep praying, and if I get the slightest inkling we’re on the wrong track, I have no problem calling it off. And I’m not giving notice at work or church until we see movement with the house.” He looked her in the eye. “All the pieces have to fall into place.”

Becca nodded and sent up a silent prayer.

Lord, if there’s any way we can stay, please . . . close this door.