CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
Wednesday, February 3

Chemo on Wednesday provided the first opportunity for Janelle to really talk to Grandma Geri about Aunt Gwynn and Pastor Jim, though she hadn’t planned to bring it up. She had the playing cards, DVDs, and magazines ready as usual. But instead Grandma Geri wanted to unload more of what she’d been carrying.

“She sees my sister as her grandmother, you know.” Grandma Geri had focused the conversation on Keisha.

Janelle was still making sure she had all the pieces. “That’s Aunt Floretta, right? Your sister in Jersey? So when Aunt Gwynn left Hope Springs, she went to stay with her?”

“That’s right. Gwynn couldn’t go back to school, and she couldn’t stay here. Would’ve been too much talk. The plan was that Floretta would take care of her while she was pregnant, and then Gwynn would come back.”

“But she never did.”

“No. She decided to keep the baby.” Grandma Geri paused. “Elwood and I told her she couldn’t bring the baby to Hope Springs. What if people saw a resemblance or somehow or other put it together that it was Jim’s? We thought we were persuading her to go ahead and give the baby up. Instead we convinced her to stay away once she kept it.”

Janelle was careful. “Grandma, why did you and Grandpa worry so much what people thought? Seems like that’s what drove this whole thing.”

Her grandmother took a minute to respond. “That’s just how it was. You didn’t do certain things. You didn’t get pregnant, and you certainly didn’t get entangled with another race. Gwynn managed to do both.”

“So Aunt Floretta helped raise Keisha, didn’t she?”

“Gwynn and Keisha lived with Floretta for years. Floretta was like a second mother to that little girl. To this day Keisha calls her Grandma.” Grandma Geri looked away.

“And you kept in touch with Aunt Floretta?”

“That was my only connection with my daughter and granddaughter,” Grandma Geri said. “Floretta would try to get Gwynn on the phone, but she’d refuse.”

Janelle was silent a minute, mulling her family history. “I knew Aunt Gwynn got pregnant in college and had to leave, and you and Grandpa wanted her to give the baby up for adoption. And I knew she went to stay with Aunt Floretta.” She tried to put herself in her aunt’s shoes. “I always thought she stayed away from Hope Springs because she was bitter toward you and Grandpa—which I guess is true. But I’m sure a lot of it was not wanting to be near the Dillons either. I couldn’t imagine seeing his parents time and again, knowing they couldn’t or wouldn’t acknowledge Keisha as their grandbaby. And I especially couldn’t imagine seeing Jim with his family. I can see why she stayed away.” She realized what she’d just said. “Sorry, Grandma.”

Grandma Geri seemed to be mulling their history as well. “I’ve sent letters apologizing over the years because I hate how it all happened,” she said. “But for the life of me, I don’t know if we would handle it any differently if we could go back. I know what life would’ve been like for them, for all of us.”

“For a while,” Janelle said, “till people got over it. And so what if they didn’t? Aunt Gwynn, Jim, and the baby could’ve moved elsewhere.”

“Jan, it always sounds plain in hindsight.”

Janelle lapsed into her own thoughts for a while. Then, “Mom and Dad used to drive up to Jersey sometimes when we were young. So I got to know Keisha a little even though we never really kept in touch.” She looked at her grandmother. “Have you met her even once?”

“Never. Only seen pictures.”

Janelle didn’t know what to say.

Janelle heard a light knock on the side door Wednesday evening as she and Stephanie cleaned the kitchen. “Hello?” a voice said.

“Come on in, Todd.”

Travis was with him. The guys were dressed in slacks and button-downs, their Wednesday evening Bible study attire.

Stephanie looked over her shoulder from her place at the sink. “I guess we should feel guilty that we weren’t at Bible study tonight—at either church.”

Travis pulled out a chair and sat down. “From what I’m hearing, that Saturday morning diner study is what’s happening. I’m thinking about crashing.”

“I’ve heard the same,” Todd said.

“So what’s up, guys?” Janelle said. “This is looking rather official.”

Todd glanced at Travis. “I’m on a mission. Travis is here for moral support, I guess.” He gave a wry smile. “I was hoping you could help me.”

Janelle sat down at the table.

“I know your family’s trying to get in touch with your aunt Gwynn, but my focus is on Keisha. I wondered if you could call and introduce us.”

“I don’t know, Todd. It’s been years since I talked to her. I’m not even sure I have the right number.”

“If you don’t, could you get it?”

“I guess . . . but there’s no guarantee she’ll get on the phone. Do you know what you’ll say?”

Todd sighed. “No idea. I don’t even want to plan it out. I’m praying for God to make the rough places smooth.”

Janelle nodded. “I like that. I’ll start praying that myself.” She got up and found her phone. “Want me to try right now?”

“That’s what I was hoping.”

Stephanie put the last pan she’d been washing in the rack to dry and came to the table.

Janelle took a breath and tapped in the number. In light of everything that had happened, she didn’t know what to say to her own cousin. How much did Keisha know?

“Whoever’s number this is,” she told them, “it’s ringing.” Seconds later a woman answered. “Hello . . . is this Keisha?”

“Yes, this is Keisha. Hi, Janelle.”

“How’d you know who it was?”

“You’re in my contacts,” she said. “You must have had the same number for a long time.”

“Likewise.” Janelle smiled into the silence. “How have you been?”

“You don’t have to make small talk, Janelle. I know why you’re calling.”

“You do?”

“Mom said everyone’s trying to get in touch with her, that you all know who my father is now.”

“So you already knew?” Janelle hadn’t been sure.

Todd was focused on Janelle’s every word.

“Yes, I knew.”

She sounded so calm. Janelle was the one who had to get her bearings. “Well, I’m actually here with, um . . . your brother, I guess I could say. Jim’s son, Todd. He wants me to introduce you two, if that’s okay.”

Keisha didn’t respond.

Janelle looked at Todd. “Keisha?”

“I’m not sure, but if he’s sitting right there . . . you can put me on speaker.”

Janelle wasn’t so sure this was a good idea either. “Okay, just a sec.” She put the phone on the table, making a face at Todd to warn him it might not go well, and pushed the speaker button. “Keisha, as I said, Todd is here with me. Just to tell you a little about him, he’s my age, thirty-four, married, with two kids who are four and two. They moved to Hope Springs from St. Louis about a month ago. He took over as pastor of Calvary Church.” She paused to see if Keisha would say anything, but she didn’t. “And, Todd, this is Keisha.”

Janelle didn’t know what else to say. She was pretty sure Keisha was married, but she didn’t know about kids.

Todd leaned forward. “Hi, Keisha, I’m so glad to meet you by phone.”

“Did you already know about me?” Keisha asked.

“No. I learned for the first time on Saturday.”

“I knew about you,” Keisha said.

Todd cleared his throat. “I’d love to know more about you. Are you married? Any kids?”

“I got married four years ago. We have a boy, Jason, who’s three.”

“That’s awesome,” Todd said. “And you live in New Jersey?”

“That’s right, in Neptune.”

“So if you don’t mind my asking,” he said, “how long have you known who your dad was?”

“My mother told me the whole story when I was twelve.”

They all looked surprised.

“Really?” Todd said. “Wow. Did you . . . did you ever want to come to Hope Springs to meet this side of your family?”

Keisha hesitated a little. “Well . . . from what I understood, it was never really an option.” She paused. “Do you mind if I speak plainly?”

“Please do,” Todd said.

“I’m sure you have warm and fuzzy feelings about your family, Todd. And I understand your dad just passed, so I’m mindful of showing respect. But the truth is that your grandparents didn’t want me because I’m black, and your dad went along with the status quo for most of my life. I honestly have a real problem with your grandfather calling himself a pastor—your father too—and yet living with the obvious prejudice they had toward black people.”

Janelle looked at the rest of them with wide eyes.

It took Todd a few seconds to recover. “You don’t mince words, that’s for sure. In all fairness, Keisha, I hear what you’re saying about Granddad, but I don’t see how you could say that about my dad. In his letter to Grandma Geri, he spoke of his love for your mother.”

“He was willing to live his life without telling a soul about me. If I were white, would that have been the case?”

“I think back then any pregnancy out of wedlock was taboo, especially in a small town. It often meant the girl going away—”

“Or it meant getting married, if you were the right color.”

Janelle had never heard such pointed discussion, but then, she’d never spoken with someone who’d had to reconcile such family history. “Keisha, I’m kind of surprised you answered the phone given the way you feel about everything.”

“My mother is the one who would rather avoid than engage, so she doesn’t answer calls. I don’t have a problem engaging the issue. I’m glad it’s finally out.”

Todd gave them a tentative glance before he continued. “Keisha, what would you think about meeting in person? My family and I could plan a trip up there or . . .”

“Or my family could come to Hope Springs?” Keisha chuckled for the first time, but she didn’t sound amused.

Janelle weighed her next words carefully. “Actually, Keisha,” she said, “it might be a good time to consider coming to Hope Springs. I don’t know if you’ve heard that Grandma Geri has advanced-stage lung cancer. I know that she’s . . . Well, she’s never met you either.”

Keisha was slow to respond. “I’ll have to give it some thought, to know if I can open myself up to meeting Todd or my mom’s mom. It would have to be from the heart, from a real desire to establish a relationship, and I don’t know if I’m there yet. I’ll pray about it.”

The four of them in Grandma Geri’s kitchen looked somber.

Todd stared at the phone, nodding. “Thank you, Keisha. Do you mind if I get your phone number from Janelle?”

“I don’t mind.”

“Take care, Keisha,” Janelle said, and ended the call.

“Well, that was interesting.” Stephanie blew out a breath and sat back.

Todd looked troubled. “I’ve always seen my dad and granddad as great men of God. She nicely and calmly called them prejudiced. That’s taking it a bit far, don’t you think? Janelle, Stephanie . . . your grandparents took the same position.”

“They all accepted the status quo regarding skin color,” Janelle said. “What I heard Keisha saying is that she expected more from them as pastors.”

“No matter how nice and calm Keisha sounded, we’d be crazy if we didn’t understand how hurt she has to have been over all this,” Travis said. “Neither set of grandparents wanted her around, and that came to include her father as well, who never acknowledged her until late in his life. Jim had a good heart. But when you look at it from her perspective . . .” He shrugged. “Can’t say I blame her.”

Todd retreated into his thoughts.

“I was just thinking,” Stephanie said, “how powerful the status quo can be. People just don’t want to break from the norm.”

“That’s interesting, Steph,” Janelle said, “because that’s been on my mind even before this revelation, and now even more so.” She looked at Todd and Travis. “I was planning to talk to the two of you this week about that very thing.”