ELEVEN

“Let’s be out, y’all,” Cory said, moving to the car. The girls piled in, seated as before. Their faces were solemn. They had just witnessed the completion of the mural dedicated to Deja.

“Yeah, drop me at my block, yo,” Coco said.

“Take me home. I don’t feel like hanging out, y’all.” Josephine was clearly shaken by her experience at the weed spot.

“Death just seems to be waiting, huh?” Cory said.

“Cory, your father is a cop, right? I know he be seeing a lot of this shit,” Coco said.

“Aw, c’mon. Why do you need to discuss that shit, man?” Danielle asked.

“No, no, it’s cool,” Cory said.

Coco stared off into the distance. Lights flickered like fireflies. She lit another cigarette. She saw the candles at the end of the block. Deja is on this block too, she thought.

“Right here is ahight, yo,” Coco said. The vehicle stopped. She shook hands all around, and with a slam of the door she was off with a bop. Coco stopped at the corner and looked at the picture behind the candle.

“Bebop.”

The name slipped from her lips. The cigarette fell to the ground. Coco turned and walked away quickly into the building, straight to the stairwell, eyes stinging. Tears flowing, she bounded to the roof, pushed the door open and let out a scream in the evening air.

More tears flowed as Coco released the burden of her latest discovery. She cried for Bebop, who sometimes had been that big sister to her. She became more and more confused as she pondered Bebop’s death. She heard someone approaching as she left. Going down the stairs, she felt something close to fear.

Coco knocked on Miss Katie’s door. She heard movement from within. After a metallic click, Miss Katie opened the door. Coco walked in. She was taken aback by the neatness of the apartment.

“Hi, Coco. I guess you heard, huh?” Miss Katie said in hushed, gentle tone. She motioned Coco toward the kitchen.

“Oh, Miss Katie,” Coco began. “I really don’t know what happened. May I use your bathroom?”

“Sure, go ahead, sweetheart. Then join me in the kitchen. I’m almost through with supper.” Coco hardly heard her in her rush to the toilet. She joined Miss Katie at the kitchen table.

“Here, have some Kool-Aid,” Ms. Katie said.

Coco accepted the glass and sipped. It was too sweet, but she drank it, anyway. It left a cloying sweetness. Coco was sure Miss Katie knew the facts of Bebop’s death.

“What happened? I mean Bebop...”

Miss Katie looked past Coco and glanced up at the ceiling before she spoke. “May the Lord have mercy upon our souls,” she said.

Then, registering Coco’s anxious expression, she said: “There has got to be a better way for us all.” Coco was patient she knew the story would eventually emerge from this piety.

“You know, during the war and all the other times my husband was fighting for this country, even after he met his death, God bless his soul, never ever have I gone looking at another man. I mean, never,” Miss Katie said. There was such finality in her voice that Coco began paying closer attention.

“But these new jack women, they just can’t leave other women’s men alone. She wouldn’t leave that drug dealer alone. It cost her,” Miss Katie said. She got up and walked away from the table.

Coco watched her go to the oven and remove fresh-baked bread. She cut it in two and wrapped one half neatly in foil.

“For you and your family, Coco.” Miss Katie pointed to the wrapped half.

“Thanks,” Coco said. But she wanted to learn more. “Where did they find her?”

“Oh, I thought you had heard the full story,” Miss Katie searched Coco’s expression. “They found them dead together, Bebop and Deja, in his apartment. She had a gun in her hand. Lover’s quarrel. Coco, is you mixed up in anything like…” Miss Katie’s voice trailed as her eyes locked with Coco’s. Coco gazed stonily at Miss Katie. “Coco, I know you are a sweet child. I know you will take care and continue to do so with God’s help.” Miss Katie tendered a caring smile. Coco rose and hugged her.

“Thanks a lot, Ms. Katie. I better head over and see what’s going on,” Coco said.

Some parts of a smile made its way across lips bitter with emotion. She tried to hold back her tears by pursing her lips. She took the wrapped bread. It felt warm to her touch. They embraced again at the front door. Coco was face to face with the elderly lady. She planted a kiss on Miss Katie’s cheek and the tears began to flow. Miss Katie held her as Coco’s body heaved with the burden of her emotional state.

“She was like a sister to me, Miss Katie,” Coco said, her voice crackling with emotion.

“Yeah, I know child. Sometimes there’s a price that we must pay for our sins. Coco, you have to continue with your education. Don’t worry about your mother. She will be alright. She’s been doing a whole lot better,” Miss Katie said.

As Coco neared her own door, her mother flung it open. “Get inside, girl. I heard you bawling your lungs out. Must be for that Miss Hottie, Bebop,” she said. Her motherly face, an expression of seriousness shattered by too much alcohol. She was drunk. There would be no sympathy for Bebop.

“Ma,” Coco said, “You don’t even know what went down. You’re just running off at da mouth.”

“Well she was fucking around wid some other girl’s man from da building. It ain’t as if she didn’t know. I would’ve shot them both dead, too. They probably deserved it.”

“Ma,” Coco lashed out, “Save your theories. I’m gonna go take a shower. Miss Katie sent this over.”

She placed the half-a-loaf of bread in her mother’s hands and walked away.

“Why d’ya have to jump in da shower right after you walk in here? If it’s sex, you better be using rubbers. Don’t be coming up in here wid any pregnancy or HIV bullshit. You little ho.”

Coco vanished into the bathroom, closing the door, seeking solitude and trying to make sense of what had happened. Bebop and Deja were killed together. Did Bebop have a gun? The thought ran counter to the sweetness of the Kool-Aid she had drunk. Here, alone in the bathroom, her mother’s voice rambling loudly in the background. Coco’s thoughts were filled with the way the ugly end of a friend released a bitter taste and left her nauseated.

She turned the shower on and cried again. She did not understand. It just didn’t make sense, any of it. Bebop was alive just a week ago, going to school and taking care of her biz. Now she’s dead in a drug dealer’s apartment.

The shower continued to run. Water sprayed hard on Coco’s head. She stepped out of the shower and shook off the water. Sad thoughts of Bebop’s death clung to the inner parts of her mind, displayed like an upside down flag, clinging to its post in a storm. She couldn’t shake the thoughts. She didn’t even hear the knocking.

“You’ve been in there long enough. What da fuck ‘re ya trying to do, drown yourself? Listen, she deserved what she got. You’re from a different set. Them West Indian gals, drug dealers is what they all about. I know shit. I should know,” Ms. Harvey said, barging into the bathroom. There was a drink in her hand and smoke puff coming out her mouth with her words.

Coco screamed back at her. “Okay, so she wuz wid someone’s man. That’s no reason to kill a person. C’mon, Ma. That’s no reason to put bullets in her.” Coco wept again.

“Well, that’s your generation, yo!” Mrs. Harvey said. She raised the glass, sloshed the drink and smacked her lips. “What is it y’all do?” She said and poured some of her drink into the sink. It left a brown stain. “Peace to those who ain’t wid us,” she mocked. Closing the door, she walked away.

That night, sleep did not come easy for Coco, and in the morning she left the apartment building way too early for school. She could hear the mourner’s chant. Coco strolled away, her bop coming in a hurry. With sadness close at her heels, she sought to escape.