Easter Conversation in the Living Room
Harry and Amber are locked in a hug. Jean sits on Marla’s floral couch and watches. Missy is in the bathroom. Marla and Gottfried are in the kitchen, where Gottfried is telling Marla that Amber has come home.
HARRY. Oh my god!
AMBER, through tears. I can’t believe you’re here.
HARRY. Neither can I, believe me.
AMBER. Stop it. Some things aren’t funny.
JEAN. Harry, are you going to hog her the whole day or do the rest of us get to say hello?
AMBER, still hugging Harry. Hello, Jean.
JEAN. Ha-ha-ha.
HARRY, to Amber. My god. You didn’t age. (To Jean.) Unlike your ancient sister.
AMBER. Jean looks great. No more of that bullshit.
HARRY. This is my last Easter. I’m not going to make amends before I die. How else will Jean live if not feeding off the guilt she has for being such a bitch to us for so long?
JEAN. Jesus. If this how today’s going to go, I’m not playing.
MISSY. Amber?
JEAN. It’s her! In the flesh!
HARRY. Jean, don’t they sell funny somewhere so you can buy it?
JEAN. Maybe the same place they sold you cancer.
HARRY. Clearly you have not found the humor store. Next you’re going to tell Missy she’s fat, right?
MISSY. I nearly died. Do you think I care if she says I’m fat again?
AMBER. You nearly died?
MISSY. You-know-who. You were right about him.
AMBER. Yeah. I know.
HARRY. Scumbag.
JEAN. Well, I—
HARRY. Don’t say anything, Jean. Just don’t say anything.
AMBER. Oh man. (Hugs Missy.) You okay? Loretta okay?
MISSY. That girl could walk through fire and still be happy, I swear.
HARRY. They all could. Look at them. Stronger than we ever were.
(All four adults look out to the deck and spy their chattering kids; they smile and nod in agreement. Marla enters.)
MARLA. Amber Marie! You came home!
AMBER. Hi, Mom. Nice to see you.
MARLA. Last time we heard from you, you were in Texas, I think.
AMBER. We were.
MARLA. Are you just visiting?
AMBER. We moved to town in January.
MARLA. Well, do I get to meet him?
HARRY. You can’t hug your kid? After sixteen years? Seriously, Mom?
AMBER. It’s fine.
MISSY. You know I was pregnant with Loretta before I got married. You didn’t kick me out.
HARRY. So was Jean.
JEAN. What? No. I wasn’t.
MISSY. Come on, Jean. Who cares? None of that shit even matters anymore.
JEAN. I got pregnant on our honeymoon.
HARRY. Sure you did.
AMBER.
MARLA.
JEAN. So where are you living?
AMBER. North city.
JEAN. Are you renting?
AMBER.
HARRY. Who cares, Jean?
JEAN. Just making conversation. Why are you all against me all of a sudden?
HARRY. I don’t think it’s sudden.
JEAN. If Matt was here, he’d stick up for me.
MARLA.
MISSY.
HARRY.
AMBER. What about Matt? Why do you all look like that all of a sudden?
HARRY. We should talk somewhere else. I have to catch you up.
JEAN. Matt’s kid went missing.
AMBER. Why didn’t any of you tell me this?
JEAN. Like we could find you?
AMBER. I sent my address to Dad. Every time I moved. He has my number.
HARRY.
JEAN.
MISSY.
MARLA. GOTTFRIED!
Gottfried isn’t in the kitchen. He isn’t in the garage. Marla looks everywhere and finally she sees him outside, talking to the kids. She weighs the possibility that her pineapple stuffing might burn if she goes outside to confront Gottfried. She decides it can wait. Waited sixteen years already. Another few minutes won’t hurt. She goes back into the kitchen.
(Amber sighs.)
HARRY. Nothing changes.
JEAN. Amen.
MISSY. I can’t believe I’m living here.
AMBER. So, why isn’t anyone talking about Matt? Did he do something wrong? His girl is really missing? Like missing missing?
(Silence.)
AMBER. When did this happen?
MISSY. Like, two years ago, I think. Snatched from the mall.
AMBER. And no one’s found her?
JEAN. Obviously not.
HARRY. No one knows anything.
AMBER. Shit.
JEAN. This family has been through the shit.
HARRY. Yeah.
AMBER. God, Harry. You especially.
HARRY. And you, Amber.
MISSY. And me.
JEAN. And Matt.
AMBER. It’s so fucked up.
JEAN. Do you have to talk like that? It’s Easter.
HARRY, points at Jean. That’s exactly why our family is so fucked up.
JEAN. What? Me asking for civilized conversation?
MISSY. You’ve never had a civil conversation in your life, Jean.
HARRY. Maybe you can buy civility wherever they sell humor.
AMBER. I didn’t come home for this.
JEAN. Well, tough luck. What you came home for is still what it always was. We’re not going to miraculously change just because you popped in.
HARRY. It’s my last Easter. If it doesn’t suck, what pain will I have to bring to the Consciousness with me?
MISSY. Oh god, Harry.
GOTTFRIED, enters through deck sliding door. You guys have great kids! What a bunch of smarties! (Shakes his head.) But Marla worked a long time to hide those eggs and they’re sharing the candy!
Marla calls for someone to fill water glasses, and Missy goes to the kitchen to get started. Harry sits down and closes his eyes as if he were meditating. Jean and Amber open the door to the deck to tell the kids to come in. The last thing Amber hears of their conversation is her son, David, saying, “We’ll take my car.”