Step Eleven
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
“Those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint” (Isaiah 40:31).
Step Eleven
Joy in God’s Presence
Bible Reading: Psalm 65:1-4
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Most of us need to desire something before we will wholeheartedly seek after it. Until we realize how much God loves us and cares about the details of our lives, we won’t want to pray to him. Until we sincerely believe that he has completely forgiven us, we will be ashamed to face him. If we hold to our misconceptions about God, this step will be a formidable chore rather than a joy.
The life of King David gives us hope. Long after he had come face-to-face with his own sinfulness, he was able to sing, “What mighty praise, O God, belongs to you in Zion. We will fulfill our vows to you, for you answer our prayers. All of us must come to you. Though we are overwhelmed by our sins, you forgive them all. What joy for those you choose to bring near, those who live in your holy courts. What festivities await us inside your holy Temple” (Psalm 65:1-4). God wants us to be like those who live and serve in his temple, walking freely into his presence. He wants us to know that we are welcome and valued before him. (See also Matthew 10:29-31.)
The place where God lives can be a place of joy and happiness for us now. We can look forward to spending time with him and living in his presence every day.
It is essential for our recovery that we draw close to God.
Step Eleven
Pools of Blessing
Bible Reading: Psalm 84:5-11
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Where do we find the desire to seek after the knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out? We probably realize that seeking after our own will only brought us misery. Instead of happiness we found sorrow; instead of power we found that we became powerless. In following our own will we ended up depressed and exhausted, on a road leading nowhere.
The desire to seek after the knowledge of God’s will comes from realizing that God’s plan for us is good. The psalmist wrote, “What joy for those whose strength comes from the LORD, who have set their minds on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. When they walk through the Valley of Weeping, it will become a place of refreshing springs. The autumn rains will clothe it with blessings. They will continue to grow stronger, and each of them will appear before God in Jerusalem” (Psalm 84:5-7).
Those who long and pray for God’s will are on a road that leads to happiness. We may still walk through the “Valley of Weeping,” but out of the sorrow will spring new life. Instead of depression, exhaustion, and a road to nowhere, we will find joy, strength, and a road that leads to heaven and the presence of a loving God.
We are not alone in the Valley of Weeping; God walks there with us.
Step Eleven
Meditation
Bible Reading: Psalm 1:1-3
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Imagination exerts amazing power! Many of us struggle with obsessive thoughts. Our imaginations are haunted by images of doing the things we crave. No matter how hard we try to exert willpower over our imaginations, our willpower loses the battle sooner or later. Instead of trying to summon up more willpower, perhaps we should try a different tactic.
The Lord told Joshua, “Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper” (Joshua 1:8). When the psalmist described people not caught up in evil, he said, “They delight in the law of the LORD, meditating on it day and night” (Psalm 1:2). Each of these passages describes meditating as a key to success in following God’s will for our lives.
The word meditate in the Bible means “to imagine” and “to ponder repeatedly.” The key to winning the battle over obsessive thoughts is to fill our imaginations with images of a life lived according to God’s plan. There’s a better way of life for us. When we begin to “delight in” imagining what that would be like, we will find that we begin to win more of our inner battles.
The more we bask in the joy of God’s presence, the more we will discover joy within.
Step Eleven
Powerful Secrets
Bible Reading: Psalm 119:9-11
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
The secrets we hide away have enormous power over our lives. How many of our addictive/compulsive behaviors were hidden or covered up? When we took the step to admit the exact nature of our wrongs to another human being, we were amazed at the way the addiction lost power as it was exposed. The power of hidden behaviors and secrets can work for us as well as against us.
David said, “I have hidden your [God’s] word in my heart, that I might not sin against you” (Psalm 119: 11). The word rendered hidden can be translated “to hide by covering over” or “to hoard secretly.” If we “hide” God’s Word in our hearts by memorizing and imagining it, we will find new power to keep our minds and hearts clean.
The power of secrets also will work to our advantage in our prayer lives. Jesus taught us, “But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you” (Matthew 6:6). Secrets have a way of being exposed. When we begin to use our ability to keep secrets for prayer and meditation, we’ll find that power working for us. And if these secrets are “exposed,” it will be God’s rewards that people see.
Special secrets with God can overpower the destructive secrets that hide within us.
Step Eleven
Finding God
Bible Reading: Psalm 105:1-9
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
As we work the Twelve Steps, we spend a lot of time looking back. We often think about the wrong things we’ve done in the past. As we proceed in our recovery, we will need strength to move along the path God wants us to follow. Part of this strength will come as we visualize God’s constant presence with us.
The psalmist wrote, “Give thanks to the LORD and proclaim his greatness. Let the whole world know what he has done. . . . Remember the wonders he has performed. . . . He is the LORD our God. His justice is seen throughout the land. He always stands by his covenant—the commitment he made to a thousand generations” (Psalm 105:1, 5-8).
From now on when we look back we will see the “the wonders he has performed.” We will look around to find his goodness “throughout the land” and look forward to the fulfillment of his promises. In prayer we thank him for what he’s done; we seek him for the strength we need today; and we ask him to fulfill his promises for tomorrow. In meditation we remember our victories, ponder his presence with us today, and consider his faithfulness and the hope that gives us for tomorrow.
When we look, we will find God in the past, the future, and the present.
Step Eleven
Seeking and Finding
Bible Reading: John 14:15-24
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We can only get to know people to the degree they allow us to do so. We cannot get close to people who choose not to reveal themselves. In most of our human relationships we find that love can open up the door to the heart of the one we seek to know. It is the same way with God.
God reached out to us through the person of Jesus Christ. When we genuinely seek after a love relationship with God, he will then reveal himself to us. Jesus said, “If you love me, obey my commandments. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. . . . No, I will not abandon you as orphans—I will come to you. . . . All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and we will come and make our home with each of them” (John 14:15-18, 23).
The way to find the knowledge of God’s will is through the person of the Holy Spirit who leads us into all truth. We find the power through our relationship with the person of Jesus Christ. As we seek God with a desire to know him and a willingness to obey, he will reveal himself: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
As we reach out toward God, we will find his hand already waiting.
Step Eleven
Patient Waiting
Bible Reading: Isaiah 40:28-31
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We all want to recover as quickly as possible. It’s hard to be patient as we wait for the process to work. Sure, we realize that we didn’t get to the difficult spot we’re in overnight. We understand that we can’t undo a lifetime of damage in a moment. But still, it is a challenge to wait patiently. Every part of recovery requires time and patience with ourselves. This step also requires that we learn to wait for God.
The prophet Isaiah gave us this promise: “Those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint” (Isaiah 40:31). Jeremiah said, “The LORD is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him. So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the LORD” (Lamentations 3:25-26).
Waiting for salvation from the Lord has its rewards. We can remain calm when it appears that nothing is happening in our recovery. As we learn to respond to life in new ways, the winds of adversity will lift us up, like wind beneath the wings of an eagle, instead of immediately knocking us down. As we develop a patient faith in God we will be able to endure to the end of the race—and win.
Even the strongest of people tire, but God’s power never diminishes.
Step Eleven
Paralyzed by Perfectionism
Bible Reading: Matthew 25:14-30
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Perfectionism can paralyze us. Perhaps we’ve been shamed for not being exactly what others wanted us to be. Now the shadow of their unrealistic expectations is cast over how we see ourselves, creating unrealistic expectations for our progress.
Jesus told a story of a man who loaned three servants money to invest for him while he was away. The first two men invested and doubled the money; the third hid his money in a hole. The third servant saw the master through the eyes of fear. He “came and said, ‘Master, I knew you were a harsh man, harvesting crops you didn’t plant and gathering crops you didn’t cultivate. I was afraid I would lose your money, so I hid it in the earth. Look, here is your money back.’ But the master replied, ‘. . . If you knew I harvested crops I didn’t plant and gathered crops I didn’t cultivate, why didn’t you deposit my money in the bank? At least I could have gotten some interest’” (Matthew 25:24-27).
When we measure ourselves by others’ expectations or by our own need to be perfect, we may not even try. All God asks is that we try to do something with our abilities and resources. When we allow ourselves the option of just making modest progress, we’ll find courage to try. Even the least improvement is better than being doomed to complete failure by our perfectionism.
Being willing to try will open the door to new aspects of our recovery.
Step Eleven
Antidote to Depression
Bible Reading: Psalm 42:4-11
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
In bad times we may get lost in our memories of the “good old days.” We may find ourselves struggling with conflicting emotions, teetering between the extremes of depression and hope.
The psalmist reflected these emotions, saying to himself, “My heart is breaking as I remember how it used to be: I walked among the crowds of worshipers, leading a great procession to the house of God, singing for joy and giving thanks amid the sound of a great celebration! Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again—my Savior and my God! Now I am deeply discouraged, but I will remember you. . . . I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again—my Savior and my God!” (Psalm 42:4-6, 11).
Look how the psalmist improved his conscious contact with God. He talked to himself, commanding his emotions, “I will put my hope in God!” He repeated, “I will praise him again,” even though he didn’t feel that way right then. In the dark times he sang songs, thought about God’s steadfast love, and prayed. We can do these things, too.
We will discover hope when we discard our inabilities for God’s infinite ability.
Step Eleven
Enjoying the “Calm”
Bible Reading: Matthew 16:24-26
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Some of us are addicted to chaos. We may be so used to crisis that we don’t know how to enjoy the calm. Life in recovery may seem boring in comparison to our old ways. We may miss the excitement and danger. The rewards may seem too slow in coming.
The apostle Paul said, “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up” (Galatians 6:9). Weeds spring up immediately. The good crops must be tended steadily even before we can see anything growing. It’s only in time that we’ll enjoy the fruit.
Jesus suggested that we expand our perspective even further, with a view toward eternity. “Jesus said to his disciples, ‘If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?’” (Matthew 16:24-26).
It is God’s will for us to have a rewarding and fulfilled life. It may be easier to adjust to our new way of life if we remember that denying ourselves immediate pleasures will bring a harvest of rich rewards, in this life and the life to come.
Immediate pleasures usually have razor blades planted in them.
Step Eleven
Showing Love
Bible Reading: 1 Corinthians 13:1-7
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We may have given up on love. Perhaps we’ve waited for love to find us, only to be disappointed. Maybe our loved ones have hurt us so badly that we needed to numb ourselves from the pain. Our addictions helped to keep us numb. Now that we’re in recovery we have to find a way to deal with the issue of love once again.
It’s God’s will that we love; without love nothing else matters (see 1 Corinthians 13:1-3). Love is more than a feeling. It’s a choice of behavior that grows in our lives; it’s a fruit of the Holy Spirit, produced in our lives as we yield to God. The Bible defines it this way: “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. . . . Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).
No one loves perfectly, but we must not give up on loving. We can accept the responsibility to love others and stop playing the victim by waiting for them to love us. We can be patient with ourselves while love grows. When we choose to act lovingly, the emotions will follow. We’ll also find that love comes back to us.
The better we know God, the more we’ll find ourselves showing love.
Step Eleven
Love Is Waiting
Bible Reading: 1 John 4:7-10
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We may feel like love just doesn’t seem to work for us. We may wonder if we’re doing something wrong. Perhaps we have problems loving because we’re disconnected from the source of true love.
The apostle John wrote, “Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. . . . But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love” (1 John 4:7-8).
Jesus said, “I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other” (John 13:34). Trying to love without first receiving God’s love is like trying to water something with a hose that’s disconnected from the faucet. When we receive God’s unconditional love for us we can begin to love ourselves. We are then told to love others as we love ourselves and as Jesus has loved us. There is a boundless reservoir of love available to us; but without receiving the love of God in Christ we will run dry.
Jesus is waiting for us to open up and receive his love. He said, “Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends” (Revelation 3:20). Love is waiting. All we have to do is to open up to the love God offers us.
The more contact we have with God, the more we’re aware of his love for us.
Step Eleven
Loved by God
Bible Reading: Psalm 8:1-6
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We develop our self-perception by noticing how the important people in our lives see us. If we grew up in a dysfunctional family, their skewed view of us probably warped our ability to see ourselves as we truly are in God’s eyes.
King David was amazed at the place God has made for us in his plan. He said, “What are mere mortals that you should think about them, human beings that you should care for them? Yet you made them only a little lower than God and crowned them with glory and honor. You gave them charge of everything you made, putting all things under their authority” (Psalm 8:4-6). “How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!” (Psalm 139:17-18). The greatest demonstration of how precious we are in God’s sight is that Jesus gave his life for us.
God wants us to realize how precious we are to him and to begin to see ourselves in the light of his love. Consider this: If we were worth God’s giving up the most precious thing he had (his only Son), what does that say about our value?
It is overwhelming when we begin to realize how much God really loves us.
Step Eleven
A New Hiding Place
Bible Reading: 2 Samuel 22:1-33
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
In the past we used our addictions as a hiding place when life became overwhelming. Now that we are in recovery, life can at times feel even more overwhelming. We’ll need a new place of refuge to escape the storms and find protection.
King David experienced many battles. He said of God, “The LORD is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety. He is my refuge, my savior. . . . I called on the LORD, who is worthy of praise, and he saved me from my enemies. The waves of death overwhelmed me; floods of destruction swept over me. The grave wrapped its ropes around me; death laid a trap in my path. But in my distress I cried out to the LORD; yes, I cried to my God for help. He heard me from his sanctuary; my cry reached his ears. . . . He is a shield for all who look to him for protection. For who is God except the LORD? Who but our God is a solid rock? God is my strong fortress” (2 Samuel 22:2-7, 31-33).
There will always be times when we feel the need for a safe place to run and hide. God can be that hiding place. When we were in distress, and “death laid a trap” for us, we called to God and he brought us to where we are today. He’s always there, ready to shield and protect us whenever we call on him.
When our lives are shaky, God is the only safe place for us to hide.
Step Eleven
A Time to Rest
Bible Reading: Exodus 20:8-11
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We need to have all our faculties about us as we seek to maintain our sobriety. If we allow ourselves to get overtired we’ll be less able to cope with the demands of life and more susceptible to relapse.
Rest is essential to the maintenance of any kind of balanced life. Weekly rest was included as one of the Ten Commandments. God declared, “You have six days each week for your ordinary work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath day of rest dedicated to the LORD your God. On that day no one in your household may do any work. . . . For in six days the LORD made the heavens, the earth, the sea, and everything in them; but on the seventh day he rested. That is why the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and set it apart as holy” (Exodus 20:9-11). The Sabbath is described as “a permanent sign of my covenant with the people of Israel” (31:17).
God wants us to have rest and balance. A weekly “Sabbath” or intermission is a time to relax from our regular duties and allow our bodies to rest. It is also a time of spiritual refreshment, a time to reflect on God’s promises. It is a day of renewing our contact with God and remembering that he sustains us in our sobriety.
We all need a day to draw close to God, his power, and his promises.
Step Eleven
God Is for Me!
Bible Reading: Job 19:8-27
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
When we experience pain and loss because of something that seems out of our control, we may feel like God is our enemy. We may never grasp why God allows such torment, but we can have faith that a time will come when we will understand his will for us.
Job felt this way, too. He said, “God has blocked my way so I cannot move. He has plunged my path into darkness. He has stripped me of my honor and removed the crown from my head. He has demolished me on every side, and I am finished. He has uprooted my hope like a fallen tree. His fury burns against me; he counts me as an enemy. His troops advance. They build up roads to attack me. They camp all around my tent. . . . My close friends detest me. Those I loved have turned against me. I have been reduced to skin and bones and have escaped death by the skin of my teeth. . . . Oh, that my words could be recorded. Oh, that they could be inscribed on a monument, carved with an iron chisel and filled with lead, engraved forever in the rock. But as for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, and he will stand upon the earth at last. And after my body has decayed, yet in my body I will see God! I will see him for myself. Yes, I will see him with my own eyes. I am overwhelmed at the thought!” (Job 19:8-27).
God is on our side, even if we can’t see it now.
We can be sure that God is on our side, even when life lets us down.
Step Eleven
Running to Win
Bible Reading: Hebrews 11:1–12:1
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Many of us feel like losers that have dropped out of the race of life. Faith in God can give us the motivation to run the race, with a real chance at life’s rewards.
Chapter 11 of Hebrews has been called faith’s “Hall of Fame.” It refers to people whose lives were used by God because of their faith. The following chapter begins this way: “Since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us” (12:1).
This illustration referred to the Olympic Games. In Bible times, men wore flowing robes. At the time of an event the athletes would strip off their robes and lay them aside to run without encumbrance. If someone tried to compete in his robes, he would get tangled up, losing both the race and the prize.
It is God’s will for us to win the race of life. The robes of our recurrent sins need to be laid aside. There will be pain from the exertion, but we’re told to pace ourselves and to bear it with patience. And remember, others who have run the same race and finished well are cheering us on!
The closer we come to God, the simpler our lives become.
Step Eleven
Rebuilding Our Faith
Bible Reading: Luke 22:31-34
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
It is easy to lose faith when we’re troubled. As we’re buffeted about by life, we may feel like the faith we once had has slipped away. We may begin to feel anger toward God.
Simon Peter had his ups and downs with God. On the night Simon Peter would deny him, Jesus said to him, “Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift each of you like wheat. But I have pleaded in prayer for you, Simon, that your faith should not fail. So when you have repented and turned to me again, strengthen your brothers” (Luke 22:31-32).
Jesus pointed out that Simon had an assailant in the spiritual realm. Jesus knew Peter would be attacked and “sifted,” but he also was confident that afterwards Peter would return to God. Wheat is sifted by throwing it repeatedly into the air and catching it. The kernels are separated from the chaff as the lighter chaff is carried away by the wind. All that remain are the solid wheat kernels, which are good.
We should not be surprised that we face times when our faith seems to disappear. We may feel like we are being ripped open and our faith is being blown away. But we needn’t worry. We’ll find the core of our faith again. And when we do, we’ll be all the better for it—and better able to encourage others, too.
With God’s help, even our failures can be useful in our recovery.
Step Eleven
A New Life
Bible Reading: 1 Chronicles 28:19-21
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Full recovery doesn’t stop with repairing our brokenness. It includes building a new life that’s free, full, and rich. It takes courage to let ourselves dream of the life we truly desire. What if we allow ourselves to hope only to be disappointed again? What if we start and fail, suffering public humiliation? These fears can paralyze us and keep us from life in all its fullness.
David dreamed of building a magnificent temple. In commissioning his son Solomon to do the work he said, “Every part of this plan . . . was given to me in writing from the hand of the LORD. . . . Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Don’t be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you” (1 Chronicles 28:19-20). The apostle Paul said, “We [believers] are carefully joined together in him, becoming a holy temple for the Lord” (Ephesians 2:21).
Just as David dreamed of building a magnificent temple, we can dare to dream of building a magnificent new life. We need not be frightened by the size of the task, for “God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished” (Philippians 1:6).
Our knowing God will provide the courage we need to build a new life.
Step Eleven
Common Sense
Bible Reading: Proverbs 4:1-10
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We’re learning to think in new ways. As we develop new thought processes we may lack confidence in our own wisdom and common sense. We may hesitate to carry out God’s will if we are afraid of the criticism of the people around us.
Common sense could be defined as our ability to figure out in advance what the likely consequences of our choices and actions will be. We’re told, “Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment” (Proverbs 4:7). We can exercise our common sense by thinking about what we can do and then doing the things that we can.
A woman wanted to do something to display her love for Jesus. So she poured some expensive perfume on him. When she did this she was criticized by the disciples. Jesus came to her defense with these words: “Leave her alone. Why criticize her for doing such a good thing to me? . . . She has done what she could” (Mark 14:6-8). These are words we also can cling to.
God wants to renew our minds and help us develop wisdom and common sense. As we try to sort out our choices and develop common sense, people may criticize us. But we can trust that God will come to our defense as long as we do what we can.
God will bring about our recovery as we seek to do what we can.
Step Eleven
A Listening God
Bible Reading: Genesis 18:20-33
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Sometimes we become involved in extremely touchy situations. We may wonder if it’s possible to change the circumstances while staying within God’s will.
Here’s what Abraham did in such a situation. “The LORD told Abraham, ‘I have heard a great outcry from Sodom and Gomorrah, because their sin is so flagrant. I am going down to see if their actions are as wicked as I have heard.’ . . . Abraham approached him and said, ‘Will you sweep away both the righteous and the wicked? Suppose you find fifty righteous people living there in the city—will you still sweep it away and not spare it for their sakes? . . . Why, you would be treating the righteous and the wicked exactly the same! Surely you wouldn’t do that! Should not the Judge of all the earth do what is right?’ And the LORD replied, ‘If I find fifty righteous people in Sodom, I will spare the entire city for their sake’” (Genesis 18:20-26). The bargaining went on: Suppose there are only forty-five . . . forty . . . thirty . . . twenty . . . ten? And God said, “Then I will not destroy it for the sake of the ten” (18:32).
Abraham wasn’t sure what God’s will was in this case; so he talked it over with him. When we don’t know how much of a change we can—or even should—make, we can talk it over with God and then try to do as much as we feel confident doing.
God is interested in us and will support our desires for change.
Step Eleven
Selfishness
Bible Reading: Isaiah 14:12-15
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
When we were following after our addictions, we were powerfully directed by our desires. We were driven. We didn’t think about the effect this had on others. Our selfishness was in control and cut us off from life as it should have been.
Selfishness is at the heart of destructive behavior. The Bible indicates that Satan was once a high-ranking angel in service of the Lord. Isaiah gives us a glimpse of Satan’s fall, writing, “How you are fallen from heaven, O shining star, son of the morning! You have been thrown down to the earth. . . . For you said to yourself, ‘I will ascend to heaven and set my throne above God’s stars. . . . I will climb to the highest heavens and be like the Most High.’ Instead, you will be brought down to the place of the dead, down to its lowest depths” (Isaiah 14:12-15).
The same kind of selfishness that brought Satan down resides in the hearts of all people on earth. No one is exempt. Addicts are no worse in nature than anyone else. It’s just that the ways we’ve chosen to meet our needs have led us to hit bottom and go through our own personal hell. When we are free enough to focus on God’s will and his power to work in our lives, he will show us a way to fulfill the needs we were trying to satisfy in vain.
When our recovery becomes selfish, a relapse is just around the corner.
Step Eleven
The Highest Power
Bible Reading: John 14:6-10
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Christian people may have condemned us to the point that now we associate Jesus Christ with rejection and disapproval. These images may make us shy away from Jesus as a distinct representative of God. We may feel more comfortable with a nameless higher Power, whose nature is rather vague.
“Jesus shouted to the crowds, ‘If you trust me, you are trusting not only me, but also God who sent me. For when you see me, you are seeing the one who sent me. I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in me will no longer remain in the dark’” (John 12:44-46). Then he told his disciples, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me. If you had really known me, you would know who my Father is. From now on, you do know him and have seen him! . . . The words I speak are not my own, but my Father who lives in me does his work through me” (14:6-7, 10).
Jesus said clearly, “This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent” (John 6:29). If we accept the Bible at all, we will see that the knowledge of God’s will isn’t vague and mysterious. It starts with believing in Jesus.
Following God’s will starts by believing that Jesus is the highest power.
Step Eleven
Friends of the Light
Bible Reading: John 3:18-21
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Sometimes we don’t want to know God’s will because there are areas in our lives that we aren’t ready to deal with yet. Recovery is a process for us. We may be ready to pray for God’s will in some areas but feel uncomfortable with having God’s light shine into the areas that are still hidden in shame.
When talking about those who refuse to trust him with their lives, Jesus said, “God’s light came into the world, but people loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil. All who do evil hate the light and refuse to go near it for fear their sins will be exposed” (John 3:19-20). “Jesus spoke to the people once more and said, ‘I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life’” (8:12).
Darkness is great when we’re trying to hide something; but light is needed when we’re trying to walk without stumbling. When we were hiding the shameful issues of our lives and holding on to our addictions, the darkness seemed like our friend. Now that we’re trying to walk in the steps of recovery, we need the light to keep us from stumbling. We don’t have to be afraid of God’s light anymore. He wants to safely guide us on the right path.
The better we know God, the closer we will walk to the light of his will.
Step Eleven
Persistent Prayer
Bible Reading: Luke 11:5-10
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We may not pray because when we prayed in the past, it didn’t seem to work. We may even have prayed for things that are promised in the Bible, but didn’t get a response. This can be discouraging and make us want to give up on prayer.
While teaching about prayer, Jesus used this example: “Suppose you went to a friend’s house at midnight, wanting to borrow three loaves of bread. . . . I tell you this—though he won’t do it for friendship’s sake, if you keep knocking long enough, he will get up and give you whatever you need because of your shameless persistence” (Luke 11:5-8).
In Old Testament times God had given promises to Israel regarding Jerusalem. Then he told them, “I have posted watchmen on your walls; they will pray day and night, continually. Take no rest, all you who pray to the LORD. Give the LORD no rest until he completes his work, until he makes Jerusalem the pride of the earth” (Isaiah 62:6-7).
Prayer takes persistence. It’s not a magic button we push to make God move. We can be confident that if we persistently pray for the things that are God’s will and don’t rest from prayer until he fulfills his promises, we will see results.
When we ask persistently of a generous God, we will receive a generous share.
Step Eleven
God’s Peace
Bible Reading: Philippians 4:4-7
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
There are times when we’re caught off guard by life. We are suddenly faced with problems that can wipe out our joy in an instant. Our hearts are disquieted and our minds begin to race. When we are grappling with unsettling problems that come our way and cause us to worry, it’s time to run to God in prayer.
From his prison cell, Paul wrote this message: “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand” (Philippians 4:6-7).
The psalmist wrote, “Enter his gates with thanksgiving; go into his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name. For the LORD is good. His unfailing love continues forever, and his faithfulness continues to each generation” (Psalm 100:4-5).
God’s gates are always open to us. He’s waiting for us, whenever we’re upset and in need of a friend. We’ll still feel the painful emotions. We don’t just hand them over to God and expect them to disappear. Prayer is a useful tool to help us work through our problems. He will give us his peace, reminding us that he’s there with us. For this, we can be thankful.
A life bathed in prayer is the best antidote for worry.
Step Eleven
Knowing and Being Known
Bible Reading: Hosea 6:1-3
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
Intimacy issues can be intimidating, especially for those of us who grew up in dysfunctional families. We may not feel safe to reveal our true selves to anyone. We may be afraid that if we were deeply intimate with others, if we let them into our hearts, they would reject us once they really knew us. We may find prayer intimidating for some of the same reasons.
Hosea once said, “Oh, that we might know the LORD! Let us press on to know him. He will respond to us as surely as the arrival of dawn or the coming of rains in early spring” (Hosea 6:3).
God wants us to know him; but he wants an intimate relationship with us, not just a surface one. The biblical word translated know is also used to describe sexual intimacy. It’s the same word used in Genesis to describe the sexual intimacy between Adam and Eve (Genesis 4:1, NKJV). Coming to know God is an act of growing and deep intimacy. It is more than knowing him with our heads; it is a knowing that takes place in our hearts as well.
If we are afraid of knowing or being known deeply by God, we will want to avoid prayer. And yet it is those of us who are intimate with God who will have the strength to do great things. We are safe to reveal our true selves to God. As we dare to do so, he will surely respond.
As our knowledge of God grows, so will our strength for recovery.
Step Eleven
Resting in God
Bible Reading: John 14:12-14
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We may have lived most of our lives trying to take care of our own needs. Our addictive behaviors may have been misplaced attempts to accomplish this very thing. Once we’ve given up our addictions, it’s still hard to rely on others to do things for us, even when we don’t have the power to handle them ourselves. This tendency to avoid reliance on others may come into play in our prayer lives, making it hard for us to depend on God.
Jesus told his disciples, “I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father. You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it!” (John 14:12-14).
Jesus has been given all authority in heaven and earth to do anything. He demonstrated this throughout his life by the mighty miracles he performed. We may feel that it would take a miracle to deal with some of our unresolved issues. But we may also be afraid of being disappointed if we rely on God to meet our needs. Jesus has given us an open door and strong assurances that there’s no need too big or too small. We really can rely on him for anything!
When our requests are in line with God’s will, he promises to answer.
Step Eleven
A Trustworthy God
Bible Reading: Mark 11:22-24
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We may have avoided prayer before we entered recovery and now find that we have questions about it. Maybe we find that our prayers go unanswered and wonder why. We may lack faith because we’re not sure the things we’re asking for are in God’s will. Our faith may also be weak because of all the broken promises we’ve experienced with others. All of these things can discourage.
There are a few basic guidelines to follow when asking God for something in prayer. First, we need to ask: “You don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it” (James 4:2). Second, we need to ask in accordance with God’s will: “Even when you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong—you want only what will give you pleasure” (James 4:3). God won’t give us the things that feed our lusts and addictions.
“Jesus said to the disciples, . . . ‘You must really believe it will happen and have no doubt in your heart. I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you’ve received it, it will be yours” (Mark 11:22-24). The way we develop a faith without doubt is to become sure about what is in God’s will. This assurance comes from knowing what he has promised us in the Bible.
The better we know God, the more we will discover how trustworthy he is.
Step Eleven
Thirst for God
Bible Reading: Psalm 27:1-6
We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry it out.
We may have started out going to God for the sake of what he could do for us, namely, freeing us from the power and effects of addiction. Now we may be surprised to find that we’re going to God out of a desire to be near someone who is wonderful, who loves us completely.
King David gave us a glimpse into his relationship with God, saying, “The one thing I ask of the LORD—the thing I seek most—is to live in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, delighting in the LORD’s perfections and meditating in his Temple. For he will conceal me there when troubles come; he will hide me in his sanctuary. He will place me out of reach on a high rock. Then I will hold my head high above my enemies who surround me. At his sanctuary I will offer sacrifices with shouts of joy, singing and praising the LORD with music” (Psalm 27:4-6).
David found great joy by improving his conscious contact with God. God is always there, but we’re not always aware of his presence. When we began to go to God to get what we needed, we grew more and more attracted to him. But when we begin to focus on getting to know God as an end in itself, we will discover that he will slowly and surely give us our hearts’ desires. Then we will see that he can be trusted with every area of our lives.
We should run to God every day—even on the best of days!