Dustin packed two coffees and waters and hope—hope of showing her that she didn’t need to carry guilt or feel responsible for what had happened to her—into his bag and set off for Trace’s place. They weren’t right for each other, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t help her.
He stopped and put a sign on the hotel’s main door, telling her he’d be at her place, and then took the short walk. It wasn’t long enough to allow him much time to overthink what he’d tell her.
He didn’t deserve her, but he wanted her. That was the problem. For the first time in his life, he needed to put someone else ahead of his own desires. She was good, despite what she thought. And the accident wasn’t her fault. It was only that. An accident.
Would she listen?
He’d make her.
At the door, he knocked twice, but it didn’t open. He was a few minutes early, so he set his supplies on the kitchen table and noticed everything had been packed and put in different areas of the house. She must’ve worked all night.
He would work as hard as she was to get this place ready for her to move back into it. The list of inspection items that Kat had provided pushed him to tackle the roof first.
A tall ladder at the side of the house gave him access to the roof. Unfortunately, it was worse than he’d first imagined. She needed an entirely new roof. He’d start by removing the shingles and tarping it until he could get roofers out here to put on a new one.
On his knees, arched over, he worked as the sun rose into the sky. No sign of Trace. He worried she’d never show, but he kept working. His arms burned from overuse and the sun that managed to sneak through the canopy by high noon.
Sweat poured down his body, and for a moment he thought about jumping into the ocean, but he wasn’t that desperate. Still, he needed a break.
He didn’t care that Trace was so late, but he worried she’d never come around him again. He’d go check the hotel to make sure she wasn’t working there, but if he didn’t find her there and she didn’t show by midday, he’d go find her at Jewels’s place. For the moment, he could stick his feet in the water and dump a bucket over his head. Sharks couldn’t go in water that shallow, could they?
Outside, he trudged through the overgrown grass. He eyed the hotel, but there was no sign of Trace, so he headed to the beach near the dock. He could wade in to his knees, splash some water on himself, and then return to work.
At the edge of the ocean, he removed his work boots and socks. He waded in to his ankles. The cool water soothed his toes and feet. Ankle deep was progress. At this rate, he’d reach knee-deep by Christmas.
Something floated toward him in the water. He jumped back, sure it was a shark, but it wasn’t. It was a paddleboard. One of Jewels’s.
A shot of heat seared his body. His breath caught. Mouth went sand dry.
He scanned the water but didn’t see anyone.
A splash rippled the waves, and he caught sight of blonde hair before it went under again.
He trembled at the sight. “Trace!”
No answer. No resurface. No Trace.
He didn’t think. Didn’t breathe. Didn’t wait.
He dove into the water headfirst and swam like Michael Phelps.
“Trace!” No answer.
At the board, he reached around under the water and touched something. It bolted up out of the surf with a yelp.
He screamed.
Trace splashed and scraped her nails at him. He grabbed her around the waist and hoisted her up onto the board. She coughed and choked on the ocean water.
“Don’t worry. I’ve got you.” He held on to the board and kicked and kicked.
“What are you doing?” Trace managed between coughs.
“Rescuing you.”
“From what? Practicing my freediving?”
He stopped kicking. “What?”
“I do that when I’m stressed or need to focus. It’s my yoga equivalent.” Trace shook her head. “Ah, you know you’re in the ocean, right?”
His attention snapped from a distressed woman to surrounding sharks. The ones he couldn’t see.
His heart beat faster than flying fish wings. Pulse hammered. Skin tingled.
He froze.
“Come on, knight in shining distress. I’ll get you to shore.” She slid off the board and kicked by his side, shoulder to shoulder toward the shore. “I guess you can swim.”
“Never said I couldn’t,” he grumbled, scanning the water for fins. “Freediving, really? Aren’t there tanks for that sort of thing?”
“Not scuba diving. It’s only thirty feet in the middle of the channel. No need for a tank.”
He wiped the stinging, salty water from his eyes. “There’s every reason for a tank. What if you got trapped down there?”
“On what? Sand?” She laughed, but her teasing didn’t bother him. He welcomed it—the distraction and the connection. “Looks like we have company.”
He flinched, sure a fin protruded from the water and headed their way, but then he followed her finger to Trevor standing on the beach laughing.
“Told you she’d get you to do something crazy. I can’t wait to see you in the pink apron mowing the lawn.”
“That doesn’t count. She didn’t convince me to do anything. I jumped in because I thought she was drowning.” When his toes brushed the sand underneath him, relief cooled his skin.
Trevor met them at the water’s edge and offered a hand to Dustin. “Listen, I don’t care how she did it. Just glad she did. Good job, Trace.”
Dustin shook his head, shooting excess water to the ground. “Right. Great job.”
Trace unstrapped the board from her ankle, and Trevor took it. He set it against the side of the wooden post of the dock and laughed all the way back up the hill.
“Thank you,” Trace said in an honest, soft tone.
“For what?”
She unzipped the shortie wetsuit and pulled her arms free, revealing a bathing suit that accentuated her chest and tight arms. His breath caught.
“For putting my safety above your fear.” Trace studied the ground. “That took courage. I can’t believe you did that for me. You’re a good man.”
His skin heated at her words. No, he’d never been a good man. Not that he was evil or unkind, just selfish. Had Trace brought out something different in him?
He stripped off his shirt and tossed it onto the dock and wrung out his shorts at the cuff. “It wasn’t a big deal.”
She hooked her fingers around his. “It was.” Her gaze traveled from his eyes, to his lips, to his bare chest, and back to his lips.
In that moment, he wanted to kiss her. Kiss her and make her see that he could give her the world and she could be happy.
She took in a stuttered breath and looked up at him.
He leaned in.
She pressed her palm to his chest. “Wait. I need to share something with you.”
Disappointment at her rejection took hold, but the way her thumb moved over his skin made him feel a longing he hadn’t felt in years, if ever. Trace was a woman worth waiting for. He couldn’t push her. He had to let her ease into something with him. And he had work to do to deserve her. “Okay. I’m listening.”
She shook her head. “Not here. Follow me.” After a glance around the area as if to search out enemies in the bushes, she let him go and walked toward the trail to her place.
The separation forced a coldness inside him he couldn’t explain in the ninety-plus degree temperature. All he could do was follow her.
At the edge of the woods, she didn’t speak. At the edge of the house, she didn’t speak. At the edge of a desk, she didn’t speak.
She opened a drawer, popped open a hidden door, and retrieved an envelope. With the crumpled white letter held to her chest, she sat on the edge of the desk and closed her eyes. “I don’t know if I can share this with you. I told you the basics, but this gives the details. An account of why I’m at fault. I’m sure you’ll hate me after you read it, but I can’t keep this to myself anymore, and I don’t know what to do.”
Dustin felt ripped in half between wanting to understand what she faced that kept them apart but at the same time dreading the knowledge. “What about Jewels, Wind, Kat, and Bri?”
She shot to her feet. “No. They can’t know. You promised you wouldn’t tell anyone. You can never say anything, or this could take you down, too.”
Dustin longed to touch her, to still her trembling hands, to pull her into his arms and hold her until she calmed and hours after. “You can trust me.”
“I know.” Trace took in a long breath and then blew it out as if to free herself from poisonous gas. “A man willing to face his fears to save me is a man I have to trust, or I’ll never trust anyone again.” She mumbled something else, but all he caught was “Dad” and “sure.”
She held out the envelope with her shaking hand, and he took it.
“Should I read it now?”
Trace nodded but took off for the back bedroom as if she couldn’t face him as he read what darkness waited inside the folded paper. He leaned against the desk and opened the envelope, unfolded the paper, and scanned the note.
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Sanders,
I am writing to tell you more about your son. He was working for me the night he died. Matt was an amazing person who had a heart for all things living. He followed me into battle and courageously faced the bureaucratic enemies ravaging our environment.
That’s what he believed, because that’s what I told him.
This isn’t easy for me to explain, but I wanted you to know that I take responsibility for your son’s death. I’ve remained silent all this time in fear of the retaliation I’d face if I spoke up, but I can’t keep the truth from you.
I’m aware that Remming Enterprises in conjunction with the Brazilian oil company paid you a substantial sum under the guise of goodwill despite your son’s illegal actions, but they lied. Your son wasn’t trying to sneak onto the rig that night to sabotage or to cause damage out of some misguided youthful notion he would be famous for his work as an extremist. Your son was there to gather photographic evidence of the illegal practices of the corporations running the rig.
I should’ve been with him to gather evidence, helping and ensuring his safety, but instead I was being manipulated by Mr. Remming with romance and empty promises. He told the authorities that I had a crush on him and he’d dissuaded me, despite my misguided attempts at winning his affections. Mr. Remming turned his deceit around and accused me of manipulating your son by using his desire to please me to convince him to perform the sabotage that got him killed.
None of this is true.
I’ve remained quiet, but despite the gag order the company and Brazilian government nudged me to sign in exchange for my freedom and a large settlement to you, I couldn’t keep quiet any longer. You needed to know the truth, even if you don’t believe me.
I’m sorry that I wasn’t there for Matt. I’ll carry that guilt with me the rest of my days. Ultimately, I take responsibility for his death because he was my intern, but I never and would never manipulate someone to destroy property. That is Remming Enterprise’s MO, not mine.
Please accept my deepest condolences and my heartfelt apology for failing your son. If I could go back and sacrifice myself for Matt, I would.
Sincerely,
Trace Latimer
Dustin lowered the paper and found Trace standing in front of him with a wild, fear-filled, wide-eyed gaze.
“Now you know the truth. It’s my fault that Matt died.”
He dropped the paper to the ground and cupped her cheek. “No. It’s not. And I’ll prove it to you.”
“No. You promised.” Trace grabbed his biceps, squeezing until her nails dug into his skin. “These people will ruin my friends and lie to everyone about me. I can’t embarrass our town like that. I came home after promising to keep my mouth shut. They paid Matt’s parents, who needed the money more than anyone. I thought I’d done the right thing at the time, but when I found out the company told them that their son had been there to commit sabotage and would’ve been put in jail, I couldn’t keep the truth any longer.”
Dustin bent over, resting his forehead on hers and willing her to hear the truth. “It wasn’t your fault. I’ll keep my promise. I would never betray you, but Trace, look at me.” He nudged her chin so she’d have to face him and looked deep into her eyes, willing her to see the truth. “You need to forgive yourself for allowing that man to manipulate you. I know you’ll never trust me when I say this, but I’m not Robert Remming, and I’d never use your feelings to get what I want.”
She blinked and took shallow breaths. “I do. God help me, but I do believe you.” She lunged into him, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him.
He stood, holding her tight, and kissed her back.
A kiss that shattered him. Broke him into a thousand pieces of nothing. But when she clung to him, the pieces glued back together. Together in a new way. A way that made him a better man, whole for the first time in his life.