––––––––
Kyran led me up the two sets of stairs then down the hallway toward his room. As we walked, I leaned into him in spite of the awkwardness between us. My crutches were in the car, so I had to rely on him to help me walk all the way to his bedroom.
This morning I wanted nothing more than to have a few quiet moments with him. Things had definitely taken a whole different turn since. I was emotionally compromised because of what I’d just found out and though hurt, I was also very angry.
Kyran was special to me. I couldn’t deny that. Being around him always seemed to make things better. Nothing was the same. Life had turned things against me again. I was caught between two brothers who had both bonded with me. I was hours away from meeting some man claiming to be a long lost family member. And there was a chance that he was right. Even if I was in denial like Simone had accused me of being, Marquis’s story was undeniably similar to the dreams I’d had.
While it was true that he could have made up the whole thing because of what I had said to Kyran the night before, there was no way for them to know about the other dreams. I hadn’t mentioned them at all.
Kyran must have felt the tension in my body because he pulled me closer to him, holding me against him as I limped to his room.
“Did you have to be so mean to Alexis?”
He looked at me for a moment before averting his eyes. “Yes.”
“He’s only trying to help,” I argued. “Isn’t that what you all want?” I couldn’t keep the sarcasm out of my voice.
“We have wanted that from the beginning,” he replied calmly.
“Right. Because you need me,” I retorted angrily.
Kyran didn’t bother denying it. “That’s part of the reason. Yes.”
Hearing him admit it so coolly stung. “Let’s talk about something else,” I said, suddenly unwilling to continue with this conversation. Knowing the mysterious alpha wanted me for devious purposes was one thing. Being aware of the Rousseaus’ intention was another very different and hurtful matter.
“You can’t just avoid every uncomfortable topic, Marjorie.” He held me even closer, fully taking advantage of the fact that I needed him in order to walk without continuously aggravating my already aching knee.
“Why not? You guys sure don’t have a problem keeping secrets or being evasive. You’re practically experts at it. I must have gotten it from you.”
“True enough.”
“So why not avoid what makes me uncomfortable?”
“Life doesn’t work that way,” he said.
“Right now, I don’t know what works which way.”
Kyran said nothing else as he helped me into his bedroom and to the bed. I sat on the edge of the mattress and watched as he sauntered over to the door and shut it before turning back to me.
“I’m really curious about a lot of things.” Looking straight at him, I said, “Including, how you feel about this cure thing. You told me once you wished there was a cure for your defect. That wish is one step closer to becoming a reality.”
His irises dilated a bit as he gazed at me. I could see he was trying to work through something, but I wasn’t sure what. I was afraid to ask since he didn’t look particularly in the mood to share.
“Is that what you think? That my interest in you is based solely on what I may gain from having a relationship with you?”
I couldn’t tell whether he was angry or not. His expression was hard to decipher.
“I don’t know what to believe, Kyran.”
In truth, I didn’t know what to think on any subject. The lies hurt. I was disappointed by the Rousseaus’ original intent, but deep down I wanted to believe that in the course of a few weeks we had formed some kind of bond. A friendship.
What I didn’t know was if our friendship actually meant something to them. It meant a lot to me that’s for sure. Especially the strange, somewhat dysfunctional relationship Kyran and I had.
“Under the circumstances, I can understand that you may find it difficult to trust that we had no choice but to keep silent, but this wasn’t something we could openly discuss with anyone.”
“Even after I figured out who—what you are? Why couldn’t you tell me then?”
“If you recall that night, you didn’t exactly take our confirmation too well,” he retorted.
“That’s because you freaked the hell out of me. How did you expect me to react? I was scared to death. Seeing someone go through such a drastic physical change isn’t exactly something I’d see every other day.” I balled my hands into tight fists on top of my thighs. “Now...I will always wonder if you’re really my friend or faking it in hopes of gaining something.”
I stared at my fists, wondering even as I finished that sentence if the bonding he claimed to have happened between us really did occur, or was it said to distract me into thinking exactly what they wanted me to think.
“Friends?” He sauntered over toward the bed and sat down to my left. “I thought we were beyond the friend stage.”
“I thought so too,” I said.
Silence filled the room following my reply.
Kyran gazed around the bedroom. My peripheral vision detected the way his lower jaw tensed. He was angry. Maybe even frustrated. But so was I.
“What would you have done had we told you the truth from the beginning? What then?” he asked.
“What are you getting at?” I turned to look at him.
“Just answer the question. What would you have done?”
Being that I had no idea what he was aiming for, I sat there in silence and thought over my response. It took but a few seconds for me to realize I would have probably been as confused as I was now—with the exception of the lack of disappointment since there were no appearances to uphold had they been honest from the start.
“I guess my reaction would have been the same.”
“I’m not talking about your reaction. I asked what you would have done.”
“I...” I glared at him. “I...don’t know.”
“You don’t know what you would have done, but what we did, we did to protect you. We didn’t want to cause you unnecessary worry if it turned out that finding you was only a coincidence. We came here on a wish. Bumping into you was just luck. Pure and simple. We got lucky. I got lucky. Never in a million years did we think we’d find you less than two weeks after moving here. And that you’d turn out to be who you are. Nothing turned out as planned. You and I...we bonded. It was hard for all of us to accept at first because we weren’t sure who you were. We came here hoping to find the Lost Child. Not his descendant. I guess life had other plans.”
“But my assumptions weren’t off the mark? You did plan to use...the Lost Child? Me?”
“Not in the way you think. We wanted to run our plea by him and hope he’d find it in his heart to help us, but we found you instead. We received the shock of our lives that first day of classes.”
I couldn’t hold back the half smile that form on my lips.
“You weren’t the only ones shocked,” I blurted before I could stop myself. I’d never forget that first period when I glanced up from my book and spotted him standing there. He was just about the most handsome guy I’d ever seen.
“Marjorie.” Uncertainly, Kyran reached for my balled up fist and dutifully uncurled my fingers so that he could thread his through mine. “What brought us together is very real. There’s no faking the bonding. I could lie—emit important details, but there’s no way I could fake what I feel for you.”
“Love?” Was the knot that tied us together responsible for that? Was he mistaking our bond for love? Or was I? “When we’re separated, do you feel anxious? Like you’re short of breath? Do you feel an indescribable pain in your chest whenever the thought of us being permanently separated crosses your mind?”
A look of stunned disbelief crossed his features. “How did you know?”
“Because that’s exactly how I feel,” I admitted.
“I do too,” he said.
“It’s because of the bond? Isn’t it?”
He looked as confused as I felt.
Then how would I know for sure whether I loved him or he loved me if what brought us together was a bond? Somehow, I just needed to put this to the test. When or where? That was to be determined soon.
“So, Alexis, he’s considered bonded with too, right?”
Kyran’s expression turned dark quickly. “Unfortunately.”
“So, why did I bond with you and not with him?”
His fingers tightened around mine. “The truth?”
“I expect no less of you.”
“I saw you first,” he stated with an air of irritation.
“That’s it? You saw me first? That’s the reason?”
“Identical twins share the same DNA. Apparently, somewhere it was designated that we—whether you and me, or you and Alexis—were made for each other. As luck would have it, we shared our first period so we met first. That’s how destined couples bond...over their first meeting. Sentiments and physical desire gradually grow after that,” he explained.
I couldn’t find it in me to say anything because there was nothing for me to add. Was it destiny? In my eyes, destiny was a concept I associated with hurdles of complications, which, sooner-or-later, one has to deal with. It’s part of the journey of life. In my case, the past few weeks were a perfect example of that theory. Chaotic one moment, disastrous the next.
I’d begun mentally to challenge everything I had come to know up to this point in my life. Nothing was definite. Tomorrow I might come to find out new things and today might get stuck in my head as just another memory.
“Oh,” was the only thing that came out of my mouth.
“I should warn you, I may or may not have to spend some time in isolation,” he said, bringing me out of my troubled thoughts. “For the past couple of days I have been feeling the oncoming symptoms of yet another episode. You are welcome to stay in my room if you’d like.”
Separation was just one of many flaws in our relationship. I’d just been discharged from the hospital and already he was being forced to limit our contact. Could our bond have been preordained? How could a relationship between us truly grow and mature if we could barely be in the same room without the risks climbing to dangerous heights?
“Where will you sleep?”
“In the cellar,” he replied casually.
“The cellar? I didn’t know you had a cellar.”
“Its purpose is to keep me locked safely away whenever I’m going through yet another relapse,” he added nonchalantly. “This entire house was erected over it.”
An instant rush of embarrassment washed through me. By his tone of voice, I knew that was something he didn’t want me to know but for some unknown reason felt compelled to share.
“I’m sorry for asking.”
“Don’t be.” He moved in closer to brush his lips over mine. “It’s part of who I am. It may not be the best of me, but it is in my nature nonetheless.”
Bringing up the bloodlust seemed like the worst thing to do. He was on edge enough as it was and I didn’t want to make things worse by talking about it.
“We don’t have to talk about it right now, Kyran,” I mumbled in a hurry. The last thing I wanted was to get his mind on that particularly disturbing subject.
“No. We don’t.” He inched closer until his nose was nestled against my neck. “We’ll have plenty of time for that later.”
Unsure as to how to feel when it came to physical contact, I held myself stiffly next to him. Anger, though dwindling with each passing second, was still present.
“Time. It seems to be the one thing we don’t have.” Even though I wasn’t up for forgiving him so soon, there was no way for me to pull away. The attraction I felt for him was so intense, it wouldn’t allow me to maintain the distance my mind so desperately required.
My heart was the one in charge now. Common sense flew out the window the moment Kyran touched me. It always did.
“We have the right here, right now.” His eyes roamed over my face, briefly assessing me before his arms tightened around me. “I think we should take advantage of these moments when they present themselves,” he said, mirroring my words from the day before.
I drew away enough to look up into his gray eyes. “That’s probably not a good idea.”
“I know, but I’m going to kiss you anyway.” Before I could form a protest his lips were on mine, sealing his promise with a long and ardent kiss that forced my heart to beat at record speed.
Since the incident with Santos, we hardly ever had a moment to share more than a quick peck and a few innocent caresses. Now that we were completely alone, it seemed as if a lot of catching up was in order.
Kyran’s arms wrapped around my waist and drew me against his solid chest. My hands tangled in his long hair, tugging gently at the strands as the kiss grew in intensity. I savored the fact that despite my near death experience, I was still alive to enjoy moments like these.
Hurt or not, my feelings for my gray-eyed werewolf boyfriend went deeper than I could control. Even if he’d lied, he did have a valid point in his favor. I could no more fight what was in my heart than he could.
Like it or not we were bonded, brought together by some invisible force. The only way out of this lifelong commitment was through death.
As Kyran’s lips actively claimed mine, I couldn’t help but wonder over the possibilities of our bonding being an illusion, created by the attraction we felt for one another. It was highly possible. He’d said so himself. If Alexis had been the first one to walk in on my life, I would have bonded with him instead. Or was his deduction accurate?
What made bonding between pairs permanent? What brought them together? What brought us together? I couldn’t understand the mechanics behind the process, but I wanted to make sense of it.
I had to find out whether Kyran and I were brought together because we were meant to be or because he’d been the so-called lucky one. Because if my feelings for him were nothing but an illusion created by the bonding, then I’d have to find a way to break our connection without the loss of lives if possible.
All doubts disappeared as Kyran’s kiss intensified, his arms drawing me closer to his body until my breasts were pushed up against the wall of his chest.
Lost in the moment, Kyran goaded me into lying flat against the mattress, his fingers glided over my skin while his lips grew greedy in their exploration of mine. I allowed my better judgment to take a step back and willed all self-consciousness to disappear. Sooner or later, the truth would come out, but right now, none of that mattered.
The only thing on my mind was to enjoy the here and the now.
A loud thump, coming from the wall behind Kyran’s bed, alerted us to the fact that there were other people in the house, keeping tabs on us. Kyran pulled back slightly, gazing down at me with a deep, lustful haze in his eyes.
“Did I hurt you?” he asked with concern.
I shook my head. “Not really, but we...uh, should have better care of our impulses,” I managed to gasp out, slightly annoyed by Alexi’s timing. I may not be too happy with Kyran, but even that wasn’t enough to keep me from enjoying his kisses.
Kyran sat back up in bed without saying a word, brushing a few locks away from his face. I took advantage of the space awarded to sit up myself and breathe in some fresh air. He had an amazing ability for making me lose all sense of self-control. Just one kiss and I ached and burned for him.
How could something so powerful be questionable? There was little doubt in my mind that attraction existed between us, but it went beyond a physical thing. I was drawn to all of him. Not just his good looks.
Dazed, I turned to look at Kyran and found him frowning as he stared at the wall the noise had emanated from. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking but it might not be very pleasant, judging by his expression. After a moment, he broke concentration and grabbed the remote control from atop the nightstand to his left.
“I have to go to the bathroom,” I said as I forced myself off the bed. “I’ll be right back.” I didn’t wait for a response and instead, limped across the room toward the bathroom.
I went in and locked the door, leaning against the wooden frame between the blood lusting werewolf in the bedroom and myself. Irked over my conflicted emotions when it came to Kyran, Alexis, and everything that the Rousseaus had confessed to me, I took a moment to reflect on these new sets of problems.
What to do?
Sighing, I squeezed my eyes shut, only to be startled by the images of the recurring dream invading my train of thought. Was it possible that I could be reliving moments lost in time? Was it possible that the man was my ancestor and the baby he carried in his arms was the one who started what could very well turn out to be my end?
Odd. It was all odd. The dream. The explanation behind it. The alpha male’s interest in me. My relationship with Kyran. Everything. Then again, the moment the Rousseaus entered my life everything became odd.
I wasn’t safe either. Not from the alpha. Not from a potential past that now haunted me. And most definitely not from a possible broken heart. Everything seemed to be going to hell with no route for an escape. I was surrounded by complications that only seemed to get worse as time ticked by.
Leaving the slight refuge the door had provided, I limped over to the sink, and turned the cold water knob to get it going. I splashed some water on my face, hoping the coldness would help break me out of my troubled thoughts. After patting my face dry with a clean washcloth, I paused to look at my reflection in the mirror above the sink.
Even though I’d gotten a full eight hours of sleep last night, I both looked and felt exhausted. I’d taken on a lot in the past few weeks, would probably have to withstand a lot more in the weeks to come, but even I had it better than the Rousseaus. Having constantly to protect me, and those I loved, was a major job they took on without complaining. Though I hadn’t asked for their guardianship, they had given it nonetheless. Like it or not, this act of unselfishness did add points in their favor.
The muffled sound of angry voices in the room I’d just left behind traveled to my ears. By the hushed tone of the conversation, I figured the twins had to be locked in another argument they didn’t want me to listen to.
I’d had my fair share of confrontational debates between Kyran and Alexis in the past two weeks to last me a lifetime. For me, it was hard to understand how two seemingly identical human beings could tolerate so little of each other. Had they always been this way? Or had this bout of sibling rivalry commenced after Kyran and I bonded?
With nowhere to go but out the same door, the choice of escaping and not confronting the scenario awaiting me in the other room was taken from me. Though reluctant to face the fuming brothers, I had to put a stop to their constant bickering. I could take no more of it. I had more important things to worry about.
Exasperated, I unlocked the door, turned the knob, and yanked the door open. Limping, I hurried out of the bathroom and found Kyran’s bedroom door wide open with Alexis’s form half way inside. Kyran blocked his access to the room. Neither looked particularly happy. The moment I reentered the bedroom they stopped arguing and stood stiffly in front of each other.
Kyran turned to look at me.
“What are you arguing about now?” I asked in frustration. Their constant quarrelling back and forth was getting more than a little bothersome.
Neither of them answered and after a few seconds, Alexis averted his gaze from his brother and opted for staring at me instead.
“Well, don’t you boys rush to answer me both at once.”
“I...we...I was just reminding Kyran that he...should keep some safe distance between you two,” he said.
“We weren’t planning on sleeping here together,” I said. “I just want to lie down and Kyran was keeping me company.”
“It’s not that it bothers me.” Alexis winced, perhaps as he realized he didn’t sound convincing at all. “I mean, Kyran hasn’t been feeling very well lately and we don’t want to...risk...” He stopped when Kyran turned to glare at him.
“You haven’t been feeling very well? What does Alexis mean by that?” I inched closer, stopping when I could lay a hand on Kyran’s arm without having to lean forward.
“I’m fine. I keep telling everyone I’m fine, but nobody believes me,” Kyran replied, but even I could see he was trying to convince more than just us.
I turned to Alexis and asked, “Has something happened?”
Shifting his weight from foot to the other, Alexis averted his gaze and said, “It’s not my place to say.”
I really didn’t want to bully the truth out of them, but since they seemed to think that by keeping secrets from me I’d be less inclined to freak out I had no choice but to say, “Fine. If you’re not going to share whatever it is that you two are keeping quiet, then at least have the decency to leave so that I can get some rest.”
Two pairs of gray eyes turned to look at me in stunned disbelief.
“Marjorie,” Kyran started. “It’s nothing serious.”
I folded my arms over my chest. “Right. Don’t worry. I get it. But I’m really tired and I want to lie down for a bit.”
Turning on my heel, I started for the bed, presenting my back to them. I limped as quickly as I could toward the queen-sized bed, fully intending on lying down and, hopefully, taking a short nap. Unfortunately, in my attempt at putting some distance between the twins and myself, I failed to notice my leg was caught in Kyran’s guitar strap, which was lying flat on the floor in front of the nightstand.
I stumbled and struggled to hold on to something so I wouldn’t fall.
On my way to reach for the bed, my knee banged the nightstand forcing a very audible, “Damn it!” out of me. Almost as soon as it hit the wooden piece of furniture, a sharp wave of heat radiated from my knee to my toes, blinding me with pain.
The bed softened my fall as I landed on it, but my knee was aggravated even further by the abrupt contact with the mattress.
In moments, both Kyran and Alexis were by my side.
“Are you in pain?” Alexis asked as he helped me sit up.
I grabbed ahold of my knee, wincing as heat radiated down my leg. “No! I’m just faking it for your sake. This is your fault!”
His eyes widened. “Mine? What did I do?”
Kyran grabbed a chair and placed it in front of me before positioning one of his pillows on top. He then carefully lifted my leg and gently positioned it on the pillow before taking a seat on the bed to my right.
“Yes! The both of you! If you weren’t constantly arguing over stupid, unimportant things...” I gritted my teeth, willing the needle-like pain to subside.
“So I’m the bad one?” he asked.
“It’s in your nature to be annoying, yes.”
Alexis furrowed his brow as he redirected his gaze to look at Kyran. After about a second or two of glaring, he said, “I could debate that argument all day long, just so you know.”