21

Louis stepped from Long Shot to Endurance—into a skinny, cylindrical, clear-walled isolation booth. The entire booth floor was a stepping disc, and another disc sat on the deck just outside.

Stepping discs had tiny control switches inset on their rims, but the tiny booth left him nowhere to stand but on the disc. He could not get at its controls, even if he had known the address of the other disc.

“Déjà vu, Louis?” Nessus asked.

Huh? Louis sensed more to the odd greeting than meeting each other after many years. He rapped on the booth wall. “I’ve had friendlier welcomes.”

“Blame me.” With some kind of a handgun dangling from her belt, Julia emerged from a dim corner of the cargo hold. “The eyeball check was a final precaution. Nessus, you may extricate our guest.”

Eyeball check? Precursor language or not, Louis thought he might have to link in Hindmost’s Voice to translate to and from English. Blame me was plain enough, though. He waited to be let out.

In Nessus’ sash, some gadget made a pocket bulge. Nessus plunged a head into the pocket—

And Louis found himself standing outside the booth.

He and Hindmost had scattered stepping discs around the Ringworld and across Long Shot, and Hindmost had never mentioned that the discs could be controlled from a distance. Somehow it didn’t surprise Louis that the Puppeteer had kept a trick in reserve.

“Welcome aboard, Louis. I’m Julia Byerley-Mancini, captain of this ship. If half what I’ve heard is true, you have some interesting stories to tell.”

“And I won’t mind telling them,” Louis said. “Nessus. Someone is waiting for you aboard Long Shot. Someone with whom you shared a special night at the ballet.”

“It has been a long time.” Nessus shivered. “I need a moment to compose myself.”

“Go when you’re ready,” Julia said.

“I’d like to see your ship,” Louis said.

“Let’s see Nessus off first.”

She wants Nessus to leave, Louis realized. What else was going on?

With a tremulous and somehow eager glissando, Nessus stepped onto the disc and disappeared.

“How about that tour?” Louis asked.

“Soon.” Julia eyed him appraisingly. “You could pilot this ship to Earth, couldn’t you? Or tell me where to find it.”

“No problem. Earth is about two hundred light-years from here, mostly to galactic south. Based on Earth years, that is. I’ll show you on a star chart.”

Beaming, she said, “Then this mission has been a brilliant success.”

“And I wouldn’t mind seeing your world. I’ve been called something of a tourist.”

“New Terra will be our next stop. I sense Nessus won’t be coming back with us.”

“My guess is he won’t.” Begging the question: would he go with Julia to this new world? Louis had been looking forward to exploring the Fleet. Free will could be a terrible thing.

“Louis, there’s someone aboard waiting to see you.”

“That doesn’t seem possible,” he said.

“Nevertheless.” Julia turned toward the door. “Wait here, please.”

Through the door Julia left ajar, Louis heard two indistinct voices. Two women’s voices. Who could he know here?

The door swung open and a tall, white-haired woman entered. Did New Terra not have boosterspice? Maybe she wasn’t the oldest person Louis had ever seen, but she looked the oldest. She had a quiet, mature grace about her.

She shuffled toward him, hope and confusion—and anger?—flickering in her eyes. “It is you. Louis, it’s been more than a century and you haven’t changed a bit.”

“I’m sorry, ma’am. I’m afraid I don’t know—”

She caught him across the jaw with a right hook. “You no-good bastard.”

*   *   *

NESSUS STEPPED INTO A NARROW CORRIDOR. “Hello?” he called. His voices echoed a bit.

“Here.” A mere chord of welcome, but laden with undertunes.

Nessus edged toward the voices. He remembered them well, but after so long apart, how could he know?

By being together. That’s how.

He rounded a corner into a small room. And standing there—

“Nessus. I had dared to hope it was you on that ship.”

Years of worry melted away. Nessus bounded forward joyfully, chanting, “Baedeker. Baedeker.”

*   *   *

LOUIS LET HIMSELF be escorted to Endurance’s compact relax room. Alice insisted they knew each other and glowered at his denials.

He synthed brandy for himself. “Can I get you something?”

“Coffee.” She smiled sadly. “I don’t suppose you remember how I take it.”

“Sorry.” He’d said that a lot since meeting her.

“A dash of milk, no sugar.” She sat at the small table, looking lost in thought, till he handed her a drink bulb. “Our last evening together was dinner at our favorite restaurant.”

“On New Terra?”

“Of course, New Terra. You made a terrible scene, blaming Sigmund for ruining your family’s life.”

Nothing like that had happened to Louis, nor did he know anyone named Sigmund, but he had stopped denying things because Alice refused to listen. She was old and her memories confused.

Even so, she packed a mean punch.

“The horrible, ironic thing, Louis? That scene was a sham, something you and Sigmund and I cooked up. But after the charade had served its purpose and we should have been together…”

“Yes?”

“You left. You abandoned your own unborn son. Alex was a great kid, and you missed him growing up. He is a good man. You would have been proud of him.”

“I’m sorry,” he told her yet again. “I’ve never been to New Terra.”

“Yes, you have. Not only that, you have grandchildren and great-grandchildren there.”

“I wouldn’t have left,” he said, stubbornly.

“You did leave. Sigmund curse him Ausfaller convinced you that leaving was for my own good. For my safety. I was off-world, and you didn’t even wait for me to get home. I had a right to take part in the decision, damn you, or to go with you. By the time…”

Alice was less a woman scorned than an Amazon pissed off. To have such fire now, she must have been a force of nature in her prime. This was not someone he would forget, tanj it!

The problem was, she didn’t seem the type to hallucinate imaginary lovers.

What did he have to unlock this puzzle?

Ausfaller. The name had a familiar ring to it, like the alias Louis had given himself. From Nessus’ reaction, Nathan Graynor wasn’t a random name plucked from the air. “Nessus was involved, too?”

“Yes! He brought you to New Terra in the first place. Then he spirited you away.”

Louis took a long swig of his brandy. Nessus had appeared from nowhere on Louis’s two hundredth birthday to recruit him for the first Ringworld expedition. Nessus had had his reasons—none of which had ever rung true.

Not an hour earlier, Hindmost had urged Louis to use an alias. When Louis had asked why, Hindmost had said to ask Nessus.

Maybe Alice wasn’t the one with a memory problem. Louis drained his brandy. “I’ll be having a long talk with Nessus.”

*   *   *

NESSUS LOST HIMSELF IN JOY and union as profound as two Citizens can know without a Bride. He and Baedeker huddled together for a while after, necks twined, in intimate silence.

“How are the children,” Baedeker finally asked.

“Well.” Nessus edged closer. “Children no longer, of course. Happy on New Terra.”

“I never meant to be gone for so long.”

A sad melody. A heartsfelt melody. And like so many Nessus had sung, an evasive melody? Long Shot had not been accelerated to the Fleet’s velocity because his mate planned a return to New Terra. Some terrible duty must yet remain.

His dread came crashing down. “The New Terrans will soon reconnect with their roots. Either my shipmates will make contact here with the ARM, or Louis will reveal the way to Human Space.” He sang softly, “I fear disaster must follow.”

“All that can wait,” Baedeker sang, “if only because we cannot change it.”

Baedeker’s pocket comp trilled insistently. They ignored it. Nessus’ pocket comp rang, and they ignored it, too.

“I have an urgent hail from Louis, aboard Endurance,” Voice announced.

“It can wait,” Nessus sang. “Tell Louis we will call back.”

They were on the fastest ship in the galaxy. They could run away and know peace at last. Only neither of them was built that way.

“We must speak with Louis,” Nessus sang.

Baedeker bobbed heads in agreement. “We owe Louis. More than he knows.”

“We will have to explain … did you hear something?”

Footsteps. Louis stuck his head into the room. His face was flushed. “I want to know my past. All of it. Now. Start with Alice Jordan.”

Nessus untwined his necks from Baedeker’s, and they stood. “And you will. I will tell you whatever you wish to know. But perhaps…”

“No perhaps. Start by explaining why I don’t remember Alice or New Terra.”

“Do you still have the Carlos Wu autodoc?” Nessus asked Baedeker.

“It is aboard,” Baedeker said.

“What does the autodoc have to do with this?” Louis asked.

Nessus stood tall, his hooves set far apart, summoning a confidence he did not feel. He might as well be unready to run: he and Baedeker were cornered. “Your surmise is true, Louis. I brought you to New Terra long ago. Your memories of that visit, and much more, are recorded in that autodoc. If I had not been in an autodoc on our return from the Ringworld, I would have offered you your memories then.

“You will come out of the autodoc remembering everything. You will find you agreed that those memories be edited.”

The color had drained from Louis’s face. With fists clenched, he studied Baedeker. “In all our years on the Ringworld, you never spoke a word of this.”

Baedeker said, “I knew of your past visit—to New Terra and the Fleet, too. I knew those memories had been removed. I did not know the recordings were with us the entire time.” With a sad glance at Nessus, he added, “We have too many secrets, even from each other.”

“But no longer,” Nessus said.

“No longer,” Baedeker agreed.

Finally, Louis spoke. “Whenever you’re ready, Nessus.”