Fiona couldn’t contain the sigh of relief that escaped her lips as she stepped inside her hotel room. It was big and shiny and expensive looking, the kind of place she never booked for herself but never minded when someone else did. In this case, it was a gesture of goodwill from the Cyprus Star’s parent company. The cruise line had been in touch with both her and Nicole, hoping to win back their good graces.
“This is…fancy,” Nicole said from behind her.
“It is. I bet it has a lovely tub.” Fiona kicked the door shut behind them, trying not to let on how exhausted she was from spending the evening with Nicole and her parents. She’d hardly done anything but sleep in the days since their rescue, and yet she still felt tired and weak. It was beyond frustrating.
In the end, she’d sweet-talked the doctors into letting her out after only two nights, and she was so grateful, she could cry. Between the doctors, nurses, Nicole, and her parents constantly bustling in and out of her room, Fiona had exceeded her capacity for human interaction. She was desperate for quiet, for a hot bath and a soft bed…the things she’d been longing for since their time on the island.
The whole time she was hospitalized, Nicole had looked so damn happy that Fiona couldn’t even be annoyed with her for letting her parents invade her room. They were lovely people. It wasn’t their fault Fiona was terminally antisocial. Nicole had spent both nights in Fiona’s hospital bed, as promised, and most of today too. Fiona hadn’t been released until half past three this afternoon, and the Morellas had promptly taken them both out to dinner.
Now all she really wanted to do was fall face-first into bed, but she was determined to properly enjoy her last night with Nicole.
“At long last, we’ve found the resort just over the hill,” Nicole said with a quiet laugh.
“Don’t you want to see your own room?” Fiona asked teasingly.
“Not even the least bit curious,” Nicole answered without hesitation. “In fact, I don’t plan to set one foot inside it.”
“What if I kick you out?”
Nicole narrowed her eyes at her. “In that case, I might go stay with my parents.”
“Do you want to be with your parents?” Fiona asked, purposely needling her, but also curious about the kind of warm, affectionate relationship Nicole had with her family, something Fiona had never known.
“Not tonight,” Nicole answered, stepping closer and sliding her hands around Fiona’s waist.
“But tomorrow?” she pushed.
Nicole let out a frustrated groan. “Yes, tomorrow. They’re my parents, but right now, I don’t want to talk about them.”
“They seem very nice,” Fiona said, nuzzling her nose against Nicole’s.
“They are, and they like you a lot too.” Nicole pressed their lips together. “So, can I stay? Please?”
“Stay.” Fiona wrapped her arms around her, pulling her flush against her body. “After all this time, we’re finally alone in a hotel room. We’ve got all the amenities we need. That bed looks really soft. And I want to fuck you in it…repeatedly.”
Nicole’s eyes had glazed over. “Yes. To all of that. Yes.”
Fiona slipped her hands into the back pockets of Nicole’s jeans. “Not used to seeing you in so many clothes.”
“Same.” Nicole tugged at the collar of Fiona’s blouse. “I can’t quite believe we got our suitcases back after all that.”
“A lucky turn of events.” She spun them, stepping Nicole toward the bed.
“We’ve had a lot of those.”
“Mm.” Fiona pushed her back onto the thick duvet, slipping one of her hands between Nicole’s legs. She could feel her heat even through the denim of her jeans. Nicole rolled her hips, taking full advantage of the contact.
Fiona knelt on top of her, wincing as her bandaged shin sank into the mattress, sending a shock wave of pain radiating up her leg. “Dammit.”
“You’re not good at being injured, are you?” Nicole sat up, rolling Fiona to the bed beside her. “What am I going to have to do to keep you off your knees tonight?”
“Don’t make me beg.” Fiona tugged at the button on Nicole’s jeans. “I might even need your help getting in and out of the tub without getting my leg wet.”
“I can definitely help with that,” Nicole said, making short work of the buttons on Fiona’s blouse. “Although first I want to put my attention toward getting other parts of you wet.”
“Too late,” Fiona murmured against her neck. “Already wet.”
Nicole pushed Fiona’s blouse over her shoulders, bending to press hot, openmouthed kisses down her chest to her navel. She tongued the piercing there, and Fiona arched off the bed, yanking at the loose knit skirt she’d worn to avoid aggravating her injury.
They scrambled out of the rest of their clothes and lay side by side on the bed, facing each other, legs entwined, hands roaming, kissing frantically.
“Does it hurt?” Nicole whispered, looking down at the bandage on Fiona’s right leg.
“No.” She nudged Nicole’s left foot with her right to illustrate her point. “Not unless I bump it.”
“I’ll be careful,” Nicole promised, giggling as her legs slid against Fiona’s. “This feels different now that we’ve both shaved.”
“The wonders of modern amenities.”
“So smooth.” Nicole thrust one of her thighs up so that it pressed against Fiona’s center, and she rolled her hips, suddenly overwhelmed by the desire raging inside her. She needed the kind of orgasm Nicole delivered so well. She needed to cleanse herself of the stress of the last two days, the pain, the hospital, so many fucking people. She needed to lose herself in the pleasure of Nicole’s touch, and she needed it now.
“You promised you wouldn’t make me beg.”
“And I never break a promise.” Nicole’s fingers slid between her legs, sending Fiona’s brain whirling in mindless pleasure.
Yes. God, yes.
She touched Nicole, giving as good as she received, stroking her toward oblivion as the same pressure built inside her. Their mouths met in a messy kiss, breasts touching, toes bracing against each other as they pressed together, moving as one. Blonde hair mixed with brown before her eyes, like earth meeting sand at the edge of their beach, blending together to form that unique place where she and Nicole existed in their own special world.
Theirs, and only theirs.
I love you. As the orgasm crashed through her, she had to bite her tongue to hold in the words. Tears slipped over her cheeks, and she kept moving, kept stroking Nicole until she’d joined her, hips bucking as she found release.
“It gets better every time,” she whispered, arms tight around Fiona.
“You’re just that good,” she teased, trying to keep things light, to keep the emotions at bay, because this was their last night together. Tomorrow, they would both fly home, leaving Greece and everything that happened here in their past.
“It’s not me,” Nicole said softly. “Or you. It’s just us.”
“Maybe it’s the bed. Or the fact that we have real food in our bellies.”
“You didn’t eat very much of your supper,” Nicole said.
“I wasn’t hungry then.” She’d been antsy, irritable, so very tired, yearning for the solitude of the hotel room she hadn’t yet seen. “I am now.”
“For me, or for food?” Nicole asked with a smile.
“Both.”
“Tonight, you can have anything you want.”
“Good.” She gave her a deep, drunken kiss. “First, I want a hot bath. And then I think we should order room service. Maybe champagne.”
Nicole gave her a look. “Okay, that you can’t have. Antibiotics, remember?”
Fiona sighed. “Right. No alcohol.”
“Promise you’ll tell me if you’re not feeling well?”
“Promise you’ll stop asking me that?” Fiona sat up. “Look, I’m taking my antibiotics without you even reminding me.” She twisted the cap off the bottle of water beside the bed and swallowed her pill.
Nicole just smiled.
“Ready for a bath?” Fiona asked.
“It sounds heavenly. I think I could bathe a dozen times a day after going a week without.”
“It felt like it took hours to get all the sand out of my hair,” Fiona said as she led the way into the bathroom.
“It feels good to be civilized again.” Nicole sat on the edge of the tub and started the water running. “Look, they’ve left you some scented soaps.”
“Lovely.”
“Although I didn’t totally hate being uncivilized together.” Nicole glanced at Fiona, something heavy in her expression, as if she was holding in words of her own.
“I didn’t either.” She dipped her fingers into the water swirling at the bottom of the tub. “But I do like being clean.”
“And I never want to eat another food cube again.”
Fiona laughed, the kind of laugh that vibrated up from the very deepest parts of her, leaving her light and airy, feeling like she could take on the world. “Shall we?”
“You first.” Nicole grabbed a towel from the stack on the counter and placed it on the edge of the tub, gesturing for Fiona to rest her leg there.
“Really unfair that I can’t take a proper bath.” She fake-pouted as she lowered herself into the hot, swirling water. “God, this feels good. I was fantasizing about this moment the whole time we were on the island.”
Nicole slipped in beside her, groaning as she relaxed into the water.
“Do your parents know you’re spending the night in my room?”
She made a noise of frustration. “No. And why do you keep bringing up my parents?”
“I’m just curious.”
Nicole looked like she was about to say something, then changed her mind. “Can I come visit you sometime?”
Fiona narrowed her eyes at her. “What?”
“After we’re home,” Nicole said, her eyes pleading. “I can’t say goodbye in the morning, Fi. Promise we’ll stay in touch.”
“We’ll stay in touch.” She left it at that, because she wasn’t very good at these things, at making emotional connections or keeping in touch with people.
“I’ve never been to France. What’s it like?” Nicole bumped her toes against Fiona’s, a gentle nudge like her questions, pushing slowly into places Fiona didn’t want touched.
“It’s beautiful. Quiet. I’ll send you a picture.”
“I’d rather see it for myself.” But she didn’t push harder for an invitation, and for that, Fiona was grateful. “Have you visited America before?”
Fiona nodded. “Several times. It’s loud and crowded, and the people are quite rude.”
“Sounds like you’re describing New York.”
“I am.” Fiona smiled at her. “You live in a horrible city.”
“I happen to love it.”
“Good for you.”
“Well, you’re welcome to visit me any time,” Nicole said, her eyes sparkling dangerously. “I’ll show you so much art, it’ll blow your mind, and then we can rent a car and leave the city. We could drive into the countryside and rent an extravagant hotel room together like this one.”
“Perhaps.” She settled lower into the water, closing her eyes, wishing desperately to feel like herself, to be rid of the fatigue and weakness that had plagued her since their rescue.
“I know what you need,” Nicole said from the other side of the tub.
“What’s that?”
“A massage.”
She cracked open an eye, peering at Nicole. “Are you offering?”
“I am.”
“Are you any good?”
Nicole shrugged, eyes sparkling. “We’ll see, won’t we?”
Fiona’s gaze caught on the bruise on her thigh, faded now to a garish yellow and green, streaked almost like the imprint of a hand on her skin, and her stomach turned so violently, she almost got sick right there in the tub. Suddenly, she couldn’t stand the sight of herself. She turned her head toward the door. “This isn’t that comfortable with one of my legs stuck up in the air.”
“Ready to get out?”
“Yes.”
Nicole reached forward and shut off the water, then pulled the drain. She slipped out of the tub and wrapped a towel around herself, bringing another back for Fiona. She extended a hand to help her out of the tub. Fiona managed not to grumble as she stood. The awkward position had left her with a cramp in the back of her right thigh.
Nicole wrapped the towel around her. “You look exhausted.”
“Didn’t sleep well in the hospital, all those nurses checking on me.”
“And you’re still recovering,” Nicole reminded her. “Let’s order room service, and I’ll give you that massage.”
“In a minute.” Fiona shooed her toward the bathroom door. “Order something for us, will you? I’m not picky.”
Nicole looked back at her, are you okay? so plainly visible in her eyes that Fiona almost laughed at the ridiculousness of it.
“I just need a minute.”
“Okay.” Nicole leaned in to give her a kiss and closed the bathroom door behind her.
Fiona sat on the mat in front of the bathtub. She folded her legs and rested her hands on her knees, desperate for the peace she’d found so readily even out there on the beach in the middle of nowhere. Tonight, it was nowhere to be found. Tonight, her leg hurt, and her eyes ached, and her heart felt like it needed a few stitches itself.
She was unraveling like the seam at the edge of the towel Nicole had given her. The room blurred around her, and she blinked back the tears swimming across her vision. Not tonight. Not here. Not while Nicole was sitting in the bedroom, waiting for her and wondering what was wrong.
Not a handprint. Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine.
Abandoning the pretense of meditation, she climbed slowly to her feet, wincing at the various aches and pains in her body, ignoring the hideous bruise on her skin, and walked to the bedroom. Nicole sat in the middle of the bed, completely naked, room service menu and phone in hand. She looked over her shoulder at Fiona with a wide smile.
“I was indecisive, so I ordered kind of a lot.”
“Sounds perfect.” She slid into the bed beside Nicole, dropping her towel to the floor as she did so. Nicole lay back, and Fiona settled with her head on her chest. “Thank you.”
“Ready for that massage?”
“Not quite yet.” Right now, she just wanted to lie here and listen to the steady rhythm of Nicole’s heart beating against her ear. Her eyes drifted shut, and the next thing she knew, someone was knocking at their door.
“Stay here,” Nicole whispered. She slipped out of bed, tucked a sheet over Fiona, and grabbed a white robe from the closet by the door before she pulled it open. Fiona just lay there and watched her, struggling to keep her eyes open.
“Food,” Nicole announced as she rolled a cart toward their bed. “We’ve got a cheese plate, some kind of Greek meatballs, stuffed grape leaves, baklava for your sweet tooth, and french fries, because…well, I had a craving, and it was on the menu.”
“Wow.” Fiona shrugged up on her elbows. “That is possibly the most amazing spread I’ve ever seen. You have weird but amazing taste in food.”
Nicole slid two trays onto the bed, and they sat there—naked—and ate all the food. It was the first full, satisfying meal Fiona had eaten since before they set off on their lifeboat adventure, and she felt immensely better afterward.
“You should get some sleep,” Nicole murmured, leaning in for a kiss before clearing away the plates from their bed.
“Not until I’ve enjoyed the rest of this night with you.”
Nicole crawled in behind her, brushing the hair off Fiona’s shoulder so she could place an openmouthed kiss there. “It’s not our last night together. I refuse to believe that.”
Fiona rolled to face her. “You have to go home and sort yourself out. Date. Date women, if you like. But you can’t possibly trust anything you think you’re feeling for me, not when we met under these circumstances. You’re in the middle of a divorce, and we got thrown into a survival situation together. It was crazy, and what we shared was amazing, but now you’ve got to get back to your real life.”
Nicole blinked back tears. “I hear the words you’re saying, but I also know what I feel for you, Fi, and I know what we shared is more than just two people turning to each other for comfort during a tough situation.”
“It was more than that,” Fiona agreed, pulling Nicole closer. “I’ve never shared anything like this with anyone else, ever, and I probably never will again.”
“Then don’t throw it away, Fiona, please.” Nicole flung her arms around her, burying her face against her neck. Her tears slid over Fiona’s skin, hot and wet.
“I’m not throwing anything away. I’m merely stating facts.”
“What if…” Nicole looked up at her, hope mixed with the tears in her eyes. “What if I go home and sort myself out, and I still feel the same way about you?”
Fiona looked away. She didn’t know what to say or how to feel. What if? “Then call me, and we’ll see what happens.”
Nicole slept deep and dreamless, drunk on the soft bed beneath her and the warm woman in her arms, safe and whole and on the mend. In the end, Fiona had slept through most of her self-proclaimed last night with Nicole. She’d put on a brave face, but the exhaustion was plain in her eyes. She’d fallen asleep about five minutes into Nicole’s massage and hadn’t stirred again.
Nicole had lain there for a long time, watching her sleep and worrying what would happen once they left Greece in the morning. Now, morning was here, and it meant a goodbye she didn’t want to say. With a sigh, she rolled over, finding the bed empty and cold beside her.
This wasn’t entirely surprising, given Fiona’s early morning yoga and meditation habit. Nicole wasn’t even worried when she looked around the room and found it empty. Fiona had probably gone outside in search of a peaceful place for her morning routine.
But her suitcase was gone. Holy shit, all her things were gone.
“No,” Nicole whispered. Fiona would never sneak out without saying goodbye. Except with every gulp of air into her lungs, Nicole realized this might be exactly the kind of thing Fiona would do.
“Dammit, Fi.” Nicole rolled over, pounding her fists against the pillow until some of her temper had subsided. Her gaze fell on a piece of paper on the table beside the bed. It was larger than standard notebook paper, crisp and unlined, and something was written on it. No, something was drawn on it.
Nicole lurched upright, reaching for the paper. It looked like a page out of a sketchbook, and oh God, Fiona had drawn them. She’d drawn them together, here in this bed. The sketch was done with some kind of charcoal pencil, Nicole’s dark hair fanning over the pillow as Fiona leaned in to press a kiss against her neck, blonde curls spilling everywhere. She’d signed the drawing at the bottom with a simple “xoxo.”
“Dammit, Fi,” she whispered again, swiping at the tears puddling in her eyes. She wanted to clutch the drawing against her chest and sob, but she didn’t want to ruin it, because it was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen, a perfect rendering of the love they’d shared.
Yes, she loved Fiona. Maybe she couldn’t officially say yet that she was in love with her. Fiona was right that Nicole needed to get her act together. Everyone knew that rushing straight out of a divorce into a serious relationship was a recipe for disaster, let alone adding in her first real relationship with a woman. But she loved her, and she would always love her, and she would never, ever forget a single moment they’d shared together.
And she’d find a goddamn way to get in touch with her once she got home to New York, because this was unacceptable. She picked up her phone to check the time and saw a text message from an unknown number.
I had an early flight, and I hate goodbyes. ~ Fi
And all the tears Nicole had been holding back flooded forth, streaming down her cheeks in a mixture of hurt and relief and too many other emotions to sort out. She pressed her face against the pillow until she’d gotten herself under control, and then she picked up her phone and started typing.
I hate you for this.
Also, how did you get my number?
Almost immediately, the little dots began to bounce at the bottom of her screen, letting her know that Fiona was typing back.
Please don’t. Your mother gave me your number yesterday when I was programming my new phone.
Nicole was so ridiculously happy to be talking to her that she was grinning like an idiot through her tears. Also, she really owed her mom one.
I don’t hate you. I should, but I don’t.
And I love the drawing so, so much.
The dots started bouncing again. I hoped you would. I wish I could chat, but my flight is boarding.
Safe travels. Talk soon?
Yes.
Nicole flopped back on the bed. She had Fiona’s number, and that was more than she’d had a few minutes ago. She’d go home and get her shit together, and then she’d fight for this thing between them with every ounce of her being.
But first, she had her own flight to catch. Reluctantly, Nicole got up and showered and packed her things. She checked out of Fiona’s room and met her parents in the lobby.
“You okay?” her mom asked.
She bobbed her head. “Just…emotional about everything, I guess.”
“Did Fiona already leave?”
“Yeah.”
“It must have been hard saying goodbye after everything you’ve been through together.”
“It was.” But she was going to get through it. She thought of the drawing tucked safely away inside her suitcase and smiled.
Fiona might want to think she didn’t care, but she did. She cared just as much as Nicole did, and they’d sort this thing out. They would.
She and her parents took a taxi to the airport, and Nicole watched the planes soaring overhead, wondering which one of them was currently jetting toward France. Was Fiona already home? It couldn’t be a very long flight, certainly much shorter than the one to New York.
Onboard, Nicole settled into a window seat with her mom beside her. Her dad took the aisle, burying his nose in one of the in-flight magazines. Nicole sighed, attempting to corral her wildly racing thoughts. She stared out the window, watching as the ground dropped away beneath them. The Greek coast was visible below, dotted with islands. Would the plane fly over their island? Would she even recognize it from the air?
“So, you and Fiona, huh?” her mom said once they’d reached cruising altitude.
Nicole turned, unsure what to make of her mother’s words. “What about us?”
“Well, you’re…together, if I’m not mistaken?”
Okaaaay, maybe her mom hadn’t been as clueless when she walked in on Nicole and Fiona in bed together as she’d thought. “Um.”
“I think she’s great,” her mom said. “Is she going to come for a visit?”
“Mom, you just asked me if I’m in a relationship with a woman, and now you’re inviting her for a visit before we’ve even talked about this?” Nicole’s brain had flipped on its head so many times since she woke up that morning, she was starting to get whiplash.
“I’ve always known you liked both men and women. This isn’t a surprise.” At Nicole’s incredulous look, she raised her eyebrows. “I’m your mother. I know these things.”
“How?”
“Let’s start with the X-Files poster in your bedroom in high school, the one where you drew little hearts around Scully’s face?”
Nicole’s cheeks were on fire. They were really having this conversation right now? On an airplane of all places? “Those hearts were so small, no one could see them but me!”
Her mother gave her a look.
“What were you doing in my bedroom to be that close to the poster?”
“Changing your sheets,” her mother said. “And then there was Lauren, in college.”
“You knew about Lauren?” Nicole’s voice rose.
“You talked about her differently from your other friends. It was obvious you were involved romantically. But you never said anything to me, so I figured I’d let you tell me in your own time, and then you met Brandon, so I didn’t see any point in bringing it up.”
“Well then.” Nicole crossed her arms over her chest. “Does Dad know?”
“I’m sitting right here,” her father said pointedly.
“Oh my God.” Nicole looked away, pretending a sudden fascination with the puffy clouds drifting outside the window.
“You didn’t think we would be disappointed, did you?” he asked.
“No, well…I don’t know. We’re Catholic.” She darted a glance over at him.
“Well, I guess we’re the kind of modern Catholics who support our daughter’s right to love whoever she chooses.”
Tears flooded Nicole’s eyes. God, she was an emotional mess this morning. She turned her face toward the window again, blowing out a breath. “Thank you. That means a lot.”
“How did you leave things with Fiona?” her mom asked.
“She told me to go home and get my shit together. Sorry.” She’d just told her parents she was bisexual, and now she’d graduated to swearing in front of them. Then again, she was thirty-five years old and swore on a regular basis without thinking twice, just not necessarily in front of her parents.
But her mom was laughing. “It was obvious that you two were smitten with each other. She couldn’t take her eyes off you.”
“She’s pretty determined to keep us apart, actually. She’s kind of a recluse in her real life, I think.”
“I could see that about her,” her mom said. “She looked like she wanted to escape our company a few times, but she was always perfectly polite.”
“She wouldn’t agree to see me again. She wants me to date other people.”
“Are you going to?”
“I don’t know. I don’t want to, but she has a point. I jumped straight out of my marriage into being stranded with her. Can I really trust my feelings right now?”
Her mom reached over and gave her hand a squeeze. “Then you go home and sort yourself out like she asked you to, and then you fight like hell for her.”