DANA TRIED HER best to stay focused on the task at hand. She was in the home office on the lower level, typing up the minutes from the PTO meeting. She’d finished the first section with the list of attendees and the treasurer’s report, and was starting on the principal’s report when her fingers left the keys and found the mouse, clicking open the Web browser.
A couple of clicks later, she was at the Web mail page for a pharmaceutical company—Scott’s employer. Just looking at it made her anxious, so she switched back to the document, finished the principal’s report, then typed the next heading, Faculty Report—and switched windows again to stare at the Web page.
She had told herself not to do this again. Two days ago she had figured out how to access Scott’s e-mail account at work. It was fairly simple. All she needed was his password, and Scott was never big on creativity when it came to passwords. After a handful of tries, she found out he was using the same one he’d used on their old desktop— Markenzie, a combination of the children’s names.
Once inside the account, she’d run though the names in his in-box from the last couple of weeks, looking for Heather’s, but she didn’t see it. She was sure the girl hadn’t gone away, and checking Scott’s text messages wasn’t easy since the phone stayed glued to his hip. This was the next best window into what was happening . . . other than asking him directly. But she didn’t want to talk about it with Scott. It would only aggravate the wounds. This was a relatively pain-free way, she told herself, to keep tabs on them.
But it wasn’t guilt-free, which was why she had decided not to do it again. She didn’t feel right afterward, like she wasn’t trusting God.
But today was Friday, the day Scott and Heather had rendezvoused for three weeks straight. She didn’t think Scott would sleep with Heather again, but she didn’t put it past Heather to try to see him. It wouldn’t be hard to play on his feelings. They’d shared an intimate oneness, an act that had bonded them emotionally. It would take a lot of strength for Scott to walk away and never look back, strength he’d have to maintain constantly. If Heather said she needed to talk to him face-to-face one last time, he might agree in a weak moment. And who knew what she might try from there.
Dana had to stay on top of the situation. If Heather made a move, she wanted to know about it.
Despite the gnawing at her conscience, Dana typed in the password and saw a series of e-mails from this morning alone about test batches, an upcoming FDA conference, questions about the expiration date for a drug. She kept scrolling down, moving into yesterday’s messages, and saw one that stopped her cold. Heather Anderson.
Fear dropped its cloak over her, causing her arms to tremble and her mind to race. The e-mail was marked at seven thirty last evening. Had Scott checked his e-mail last night from home? Certainly he saw it when he arrived at work this morning. Why hadn’t he told Dana about it? This was something he should have shared.
Dana opened the message, her stomach clenching as she read.
Hey Love,
It’s been almost two weeks and you haven’t returned my calls. Haven’t we laid low long enough? I miss you. All of you. Let’s at least meet tomorrow for lunch at our favorite spot. Twelve sharp.
Heather
Dana’s eyes darted to the clock at the bottom right of the screen. 12:10. She snatched the handset from the base and punched the numbers for Scott’s office. When she got voice mail, she pushed 0 for the receptionist.
“Hi, is Scott Elliott available?”
“I’m sorry, Scott left for lunch a few minutes ago. May I put you through to his voice mail?”
“No. Thanks.”
Dana paced as she dialed Scott’s cell number, suspicion and dread flooding her being. She didn’t know what she would do if voice mail— “Hello, you’ve reached Scott Elliott . . .”
Dana threw the phone across the room. The back flew off and the battery skittered into the wall.
“I hate her!” She yelled it so loudly her throat hurt. Hey Love? Is that what she called him? Is that what he called her? She bent down and glared at the screen again. What was this about lying low? Did they have an agreement? Pretend it was over until Dana was lulled into believing it was so?
She paced the room again, so angry she couldn’t cry, an anger that worsened by the second because she didn’t know where they were. She couldn’t be more sure that Scott was with Heather. Right in some restaurant, proving by his very presence that he cared, that she had a hold on him.
Dana picked up the phone and battery, pieced them together, and dialed his office again. She got the receptionist.
“Hi, this is Scott Elliott’s wife, and I need to reach him. Did he happen to mention where he was going for lunch?”
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Elliott, he didn’t. Should I tell him you called?”
“No. No, thank you.”
She placed the phone on the desk this time and moved her deliberations upstairs, stopping in the foyer. What could she do? She stared at the wall and it came to her.
Stephanie. If she knew Heather well enough to invite her to the wedding, there was a good chance she had her number.
Dana grabbed the kitchen phone and dialed.
“You’re trying to meet for mentoring today, aren’t you?” Stephanie said.
“Stephanie, I need Heather Anderson’s cell phone number. Do you have it?” She found a pencil on the counter and snatched a telephone bill to write on.
“Why?”
Dana sighed. “Steph, it’s private, but I really need it.”
“She’s the one Scott had the affair with, isn’t she?”
Why did I call Stephanie?
“How on earth did you jump to that conclusion?”
“There’s something about her. I’ve never really liked her. I invited her to my wedding because she hangs out with some friends of mine, but I wouldn’t be shocked if she bedded a married man. And if you’re trying to get her number, that has to be it. Why else would you be calling her?”
Dana didn’t have a quick response, so Stephanie spoke again. “I don’t see what good it’ll do to call her, Dana.”
Dana wasn’t in the mood for a lecture, least of all from Stephanie. “Will you give me the number or not, Steph?”
Stephanie paused. “Let me find it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
She gave Dana the number, and Dana stared at it as Hey Love looped through her mind, rekindling her anger. She stabbed the numbers with the pencil eraser and seconds later heard a “Hello” that sounded confused.
“Heather, this is Dana Elliott.”
“Dana?”
“Dana. You know, Scott’s wife.”
“And you’re calling me because . . .”
“I’m calling to tell you to stay away from my husband. Don’t call, don’t e-mail—”
“Oh, how about ‘Don’t go to lunch,’ because he’s sitting right here.” The phone shifted. “It’s for you, love.”
Dana could tell she was smiling.
“It’s your wife.”
“Dana?” Scott sounded hurried and anxious, as she’d expect him to sound when he was caught. Again. “Dana!”
She let the phone fall, mostly because she couldn’t help it. Her body was trembling so badly she dropped to the floor and pulled her knees to her chest, folding her arms tightly around them. The tears came now, a flood of them. How stupid she’d been to trust Scott! He must have missed Heather as much as Heather missed him. Dana was sobbing so hard she began coughing. He and Heather could have each other. She was through.
When the waves of tears passed, she came to her feet, walked calmly to the bedroom, and started tossing Scott’s clothes from the closet onto the bedroom floor. She wanted him out by nightfall and she didn’t care what they told the kids. Let him come up with a story.
She’d been thankful up to now that Mackenzie and Mark were oblivious to his affair. They’d been in kids’ church during his announcement, and though she’d braced herself for the church chatter to reach their ears, God must’ve had a shield around them, because it hadn’t happened. But now they’d know—and maybe they needed to know the truth, that their father was a liar and a cheater. Dana took two shoes at a time from the shelf and threw them across the floor. The tears had started again, angry tears. She snatched a few silk ties from a hook and—
“Dana!”
Scott had entered the bedroom, greeted by the tornado of a mess she had made. When she saw his face at the closet door, she threw the ties at him, though they landed short of the target.
Scott rushed to her and held her tight. “Oh, baby, I can’t believe this.”
“Believe it.” She wrestled to get free. “I want you out.”
He lifted her chin with a finger. “Baby, it’s not what you think.” He held her again. “Oh, Dana. Sweetheart, you’ve got to hear me out.”
Shaking again, Dana broke free and moved into the bedroom. She swiped some tears with the back of her hand and headed for the door.
Scott grabbed her hand and pulled her back. More forcefully this time, he said, “Dana, we have to talk.”
He walked her to the bed and, practically numb, she followed. But she refused to sit as he did. She folded her arms and looked away.
“I have no idea how you got Heather’s number or how you happened to call when I was with her, but let me tell you why I was there.” He anchored his forearms on his thighs and clasped his hands. “For the last couple of weeks, Heather’s been calling me every day, several times a day, leaving these long voice mails.”
She glowered at him. “You never told me about that.”
He threw up his hands. “I was trying to ignore her and move on. Why would I want to talk to you about her?”
Dana rolled her stare back to the distance.
“Then she started e-mailing me at work every day, and I wouldn’t reply. I’d just delete them. Seemed like her messages were getting more and more insane, calling me ‘love’ and acting like we were going to pick back up where we left off. We never called each other names like that, and I made it clear it was over.”
Dana stared downward now, listening more intently.
“I get to work this morning, and she’s sent another e-mail asking me to meet her for lunch. I ignored that one, too, and had to run to a meeting. When I got back to my office, I found out she had come up to my job! She actually came into my building and said she needed to see me. They said I wasn’t available, and she said to tell me she’d see me at lunch.”
Scott shook his head. “I said, ‘This is it. I’ve got to tell this woman I’m sorry things went where they did between us, but she has to stay away from me. Period.’”
Tears slid down Dana’s cheeks again. She should’ve trusted God to handle it. God was handling it.
“I was only there for five minutes, long enough to tell her what I had to tell her, when the phone rang. She was upset and accusing me of using her and throwing her aside. But her whole tone changed on the phone, and when she said it was you, I thought she was playing games—especially when she gave it to me and I didn’t hear anything. I tried to call and you didn’t answer, so I came home. As soon as I walked in here”—he looked at the shambles she’d made of the room— “I knew it really was you.”
He took her hand and pulled her down beside him. “What happened? What made you call her?”
Dana bit the inside of her lip. “I . . . I read her e-mail about lunch today.”
Scott showed his surprise. “How did you get into my account?”
Dana gave him a look.
“Okay, it was easy to figure out. Wow. How did you get her number?”
“Stephanie.”
“You weren’t messing around, were you?” Scott’s tone was free of accusation. He wove his fingers with hers. “If I hadn’t violated your trust, you wouldn’t have felt you had to do all of that.” He sighed. “I should’ve told you she was contacting me, but I just didn’t want to talk about her. I was kind of working it out between me and God.”
“I guess . . .” Dana stared at their fingers. With all she’d done, she might as well bare her soul. “I guess part of the problem is I was jealous of her. I thought it would be easy for her to step back into your life because she’s so pretty. And she’s got the body . . . and the hair.”
“Baby, are you kidding?” Scott stood and brought her up with him. “Come here,” he said softly.
He led her into the bathroom and stood behind her as they faced the mirror. “I’m glad you cut your hair, because it showcased this.”
She turned and looked up at him. “What?”
“Your face. With short hair, the shape of your big, beautiful eyes stands out, your smooth complexion, everything. And the cut gives you a carefree look, like you’re confident in who you are. I love that.” He brought his arms around her waist and grazed her cheek with his.
“And I love every inch of your body. Every curve was made for me. And what I love especially is how it changes with the seasons, from young woman to mother, and eventually to middle age and older, because it’s a reflection of God’s goodness and grace in holding us together through those seasons.”
He turned her around. “You and me, Dana. That’s it. That’s all I want.” Scott kissed her, softly at first, more passionately by the second.
Dana brought her arms around his back and savored the moment. They hadn’t been this close—she hadn’t been this aroused—since before the affair. Most of her wanted to make love to her husband, but one part cried out still that it wasn’t ready. It couldn’t yet erase that image of Scott and Heather lost in one another’s arms. It made her sick still to think about it, and at their first counseling session yesterday, the assistant pastor had told her to take as much time as she needed. She felt torn as Scott slowed the kiss and groaned, an eye on his watch.
“I’ve got to get back for a meeting, sweetheart. I hate to leave you like this.”
Her heart settled down.
Thank You, God.
“It’s okay. I’m so glad you came home.” She kissed him again. “I love you.”
He traced a finger across her brow. “I love you too.” He took her hand and together they walked out of the bathroom. “What are you doing this afternoon?”
“I’ve got a little time before the kids get out of school.” She scooped up one of Scott’s shoes from the floor and gave him a sheepish smile. “Guess I need to do some picking up.”
He headed toward the bedroom door. “You mean I don’t have to move out?”
“Not unless I’m moving with you.”
Scott blew her a kiss and bounded down the stairs.
Dana got on her knees and bowed, face to the ground, thanking God. Because in the midst of the most painful trial of her life—even when she hadn’t sought Him and even when her prayer life hadn’t been what it should—He had been faithful. And because, though she wouldn’t have thought it possible, never had she felt as much love and appreciation for her husband as she did in that very moment.