Yossi! Yossi! Are you there?” Nir frantically called his friend’s name, praying for a response.
Everyone in CARL was still, eyes focused on the giant speaker mounted to the wall as if it could somehow give a glimpse of what was happening near that little patch of scrub in the Negev. Nir could make out the laughter and the voices of the terrorists, but the words were indiscernible. The sound of Adira’s torment, however, was crystal clear.
Then there was Yossi. “Umph…Umph…Umph…” With each blow, his reaction was weaker. Finally, the beating stopped, and the room resounded with one rasp followed by the next as the young analyst labored to draw in each successive breath.
Then he spoke, pushing out a phrase after each grating inhalation. “One job…I…I failed.”
A gunshot distorted the speakers, followed by a second. When the sounds dissipated, the rasps were gone.
Crying and cursing filled the auditory void. Each analyst and ops member expressed their anger and grief in their own way, with all of them vowing revenge on the pigs who had done this.
Nir continued to stare at the speaker. He knew this wasn’t over. Through the expressions of sorrow, he could still hear the assault of Adira.
He sat. Silent. Still. He could feel the tears trailing out of the corners of his eyes.
Gradually, the others began to take notice. When they did, they, too, quieted their heartache. They remained there out of respect for the next 20 minutes. With each cry from Adira and every outburst of laughter from the murdering rapists, Nir’s grief grew and his hatred deepened.
Finally, blessedly, there were two shots. Soon after, engines fired up, then faded away.
Everyone remained still where they were.
After several minutes, Nir said, “All of you go home. Your families need you. Make sure you’re back here first thing tomorrow. We’ve got work to do.”
Liora and Imri were the first to walk out. The others filed out behind them. Yaron and Gil each placed a hand on Nir’s shoulder as they walked by. Then the door closed, and he was alone.
Now that he was by himself, he placed his head into his hands and broke down. Sorrow, guilt, helplessness, anger—it all poured out of him. He allowed himself a few minutes to get it all out before he lifted his head up. Slamming his hand on the table, he shouted, “Enough!”
Deep breath, followed by another, then another.
“Get control of yourself.” Nir wasn’t in the habit of talking to himself, but he needed something to break through the violence of his thoughts. “You’ve got people to lead. You’ve got people to kill. Use the pain to make yourself better, smarter, more determined, more lethal. Make them pay. Every last one of them. Make them pay.”
Seeing that his phone still had an open line, he pressed “end.” When he did, it brought up his missed calls. There she was.
Nicole. She needs to know. Just please don’t give me optimistic happy God crap.
After a couple more breaths to make sure the emotion was all out, he pressed her name on his call list. She answered on the first ring.
“How’s Yossi?” she asked. Her South African accent was stronger than usual, as often happened during stressful times.
When he didn’t answer right away, she said, “Oh, Nir. And Adira too?”
“They found their hide. He was beaten, then shot. Adira was…these people are animals. It got to the point that I was relieved when they killed her. How sick and twisted is that?”
There was silence. Then Nicole spoke. “No, I get it. I understand. I just…I just can’t believe they’re gone.”
“I know. First, what happened in Damascus last year losing Doron, and now this. I mean, why Yossi? He was such a good guy. Quite literally he’d give you the shirt off his back. And the best analyst I’ve ever seen at processing through all the data.”
“Yeah, he was a bright light in CARL. Always making us laugh. Always watching over Lahav to make sure he didn’t get himself fired or arrested.”
Nir laughed bitterly. “Yeah, he did a good job of that.” They paused in their reminiscences. “I just don’t get it. From what I’m hearing, Yossi and Adira are just two stories of hundreds today. Murder, rape, torture, kidnapping—it’s all over the south. Today, evil is having a field day, and the bad guys get the win.”
Nicole took a breath to talk, but Nir interrupted her. “And please don’t give me some optimistic, ‘Well, God is still in control, and He’ll make it all good.’ There is no good in this and I don’t know what God was doing today, but He sure wasn’t protecting Israel.”
There was an edge to Nicole’s voice when she replied. “That isn’t what I was going to say, Nir. And there is no reason that today of all days you should turn us into adversaries.”
Nir leaned back in his chair and rubbed his forehead. “You’re right. Sorry.”
When Nicole spoke again, her voice was much softer. “You may be surprised to hear that I was going to agree with you. Evil is having a field day today. But from what I’ve seen in my Bible, especially in the Old Testament, every time someone comes out against God’s people, there is a reckoning. Even if it starts as God using some nation to teach Israel a lesson, He’d later punish them for hurting the people He loves.”
That set Nir off. “Wait, wait, wait. Are you trying to say that this is all happening because God is teaching Israel a lesson?”
“Nice job completely missing my point, you yutz. What I’m saying is that God loves Israel. There’s a verse somewhere that says the people who mess with Israel mess with the apple of God’s eye. Hamas just poked God in the eye. How do you think He’s going to respond?”
Nir pictured God getting poked in the eye. “I can’t say exactly, but I certainly look forward to being part of it. Which brings me to another reason why I made this call. I need you here, Nicole. It hasn’t been passed down the chain yet, but I have no doubt that while the IDF goes after the snake, we’ll be chopping off the snake’s head.”
“Well, isn’t it convenient that I just got off with my agent telling her to cancel all my modeling gigs until further notice. It’s not just that you need me there. I need to be there.”
Relief filled Nir as he pictured her sitting at her workstation in the corner behind him. “That’s great. Thanks, Nicole. First plane out. We’ll have your computers booted up and ready when you get here.”
“Good,” Nicole responded. Then she paused. “I know that I can never fully feel the pain of what you and your fellow Israelis are experiencing. Just know that I am grieving with you.”
Nir disconnected the call and set the phone down on the table.