Zyan
Zyan wasn't sure what had woken him, until he turned to look at Carter. His eyes were rapidly moving behind closed lids as drops of sweat ran down his temples and lined his brow. His breathing was unhealthily arrhythmic.
Zyan hurried to grab his shoulder and shake him. Carter's eyes flew open, but his breathing remained heavy as his gaze flicked around the room, until it landed on Zyan's face.
"You had a nightmare," Zyan said, voice quiet in the dark room.
Carter nodded a little and kicked off the covers, while Zyan helped him by pulling the bedspread over to his half.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Carter pushed his hair up and away from his sweaty forehead. "Old memories," was all he gave as an explanation.
Zyan crossed his legs as his brain brought back images of a time he'd rather forget. He knew sleep wouldn't be on either of their minds for a while.
Carter sighed. "What is it?"
Zyan felt guilty. He avoided Carter's gaze, though he could barely make his eyes out in the strips of silver moonlight pushing through the blinds. "Was it…you know…the time when…"
Carter reached out and grabbed hold of Zyan's wrist. Zyan barely managed to look at the hand before it had tugged him back down and into Carter's side. "It doesn't matter anymore," Carter said quietly. "I forgave you a long time ago."
"You nearly died," Zyan said in a low voice. "It would have been my fault."
"You wanted to help. You felt a compulsion. I couldn't have lived with myself if I'd let you go alone. It was my decision."
Zyan was too tired to argue. It was an old argument, already revisited too many times to count. Carter had forgiven him decades ago, but Zyan would never forget, and he'd never forgive himself. The guilt would never stop. Still, he gave a curt nod, if only to satisfy Carter.
He was pulled closer. A cold hand found its way onto the bare skin of his back before it started drawing invisible patterns. Zyan felt himself melt into the touch.
"Tell me something." Carter's voice was close. Zyan could feel the breath brush through his hair. "I could use a distraction."
Zyan was silent as he tried to think of anything that wasn't related to what they were trying to avoid. But he'd practically pushed Carter to risk his life just because he himself had felt guilty—how could he not think about that? He cleared his throat and squeezed his eyes shut. He needed to think of anything, anything that wasn't this. "After our last divorce, I joined a gym," he offered finally, saying the first thing that popped into his head.
Carter's movements didn't falter, despite the surprise in his voice. "Really?"
Zyan nodded against Carter's shoulder. "Yes. But I soon realized I was one of those people that only go there and do a few exercises until they don't feel too guilty leaving again. I canceled the membership again after two months."
Carter's laughter was low, and rough with fatigue. "Oh, wow, that's beautiful."
Normally, Zyan would have lightly punched Carter at the teasing tone in his voice, but right now, he was just glad they were both still here, together and healthy.
"Any other stories you'd like to share?" Carter asked playfully.
Zyan hummed a little while he dug through his memories. "I can't think of anything right now."
Carter was quiet after that. Zyan would have assumed he'd fallen asleep if it weren't for the continuing soft touches against his skin.
"Can I ask you something?" Carter asked finally.
"Sure."
"Why did you take me back?"
Zyan tensed. He suddenly felt more awake.
Carter must have felt the movement under his fingertips, because his hand flattened against Zyan's back. "You don't have to answer," he added quickly.
Zyan shook his head and forced himself to relax again. "It's okay," he reassured him. There was no point in hiding it any longer. He'd known the question would come eventually, and he had expected it a lot sooner. But, well, with their age, two years felt about as long as two weeks to mortals.
Carter slowly picked his pattern-tracing back up.
"Do you remember…" Zyan started but trailed off, taking a deep breath. "The first time we got married…" He paused. "The first time we got married, you wrote me this letter and…you gave it to me after the ceremony."
"'For the day you stop loving me.'" Carter recalled the words written on the envelope.
Zyan nodded again. "I remember, at the time, I thought it was impossible. Ridiculous, even. But you told me—"
"'Just keep it for me. Please.'"
"Yes."
"What did I write?"
"You don't remember?"
Carter shook his head. "How could I? It's been centuries."
"I suppose…"
When Zyan didn't say anything for a few seconds, thinking about where to start and what to say—if he should retell what he remembered reading or just give a general outline—Carter jerked his shoulder, as if he were worried Zyan had fallen asleep. "So? What did I write?"
Zyan flattened his hand over Carter's heart. "Nothing groundbreaking, don't worry."
"Well, it must have been enough for you to change your mind," Carter argued.
"Not really," Zyan replied, sounding casual. "It just reminded me of the people we used to be. Specifically, our sex life and how hot I used to think you were."
"Excuse me? What do you mean 'used to' and 'were?'"
Zyan rolled his eyes, glad that Carter couldn't see how fond he was. "You're so easily distracted."
Carter repeatedly jerked his shoulder again. "Just tell me what I put in that damn letter!"
Zyan reached up and put his hand over Carter's mouth. "Shush, Ava and Jessica are sleeping next door."
"Then jus' tell me," Carter replied, voice muffled by Zyan's hand.
Zyan put his hand back on Carter's chest. "I will." He paused. "One day."
"Oh, come on!"
Zyan clapped his hand back over Carter's mouth. "Hush!" He shot Carter a pointed look, and was met with narrowed eyes. Still, he lifted his hand.
Carter glared at him until Zyan had lay back down. The silence stretched out until Carter grumbled something unintelligible to himself and curled closer to Zyan, despite his obvious pouting. Zyan suppressed a smile and tugged Carter closer.
Eventually, they both drifted off again.
No more nightmares plagued Carter that night.
*~*~*
"I'm just saying," Zyan said. "She didn't set a dress code, so technically, we could go in sweatpants."
Carter slapped Zyan's hands away to fix the black-and-gray tie for him. "Stop complaining already. It's only a few hours. We'll just show up, give them the gift I bought them, and wish them the best. And if I have any say in it, we'll also squeeze in some half-assed dancing."
Since Zyan couldn't currently cross his arms in front of his chest, he settled for putting his hands on his hips and looking grumpy. "I already feel like I'm suffocating," he complained.
Carter flattened his hand over the tie and looked up at Zyan with a raised eyebrow. "You didn't even do up the first button."
"The tie is crushing my windpipe," Zyan argued.
Carter rolled his eyes and loosened the knot a little further before he patted Zyan on the chest and took a step back. "Do it for Carol."
Zyan huffed a breath and shrugged on the suit jacket Carter was holding out for him.
"Now put on your shoes and move your butt to the door. You still have to help me do the girls' hair."
Zyan muttered grumpily while he tied his shoes. "When did I get put on hair duty?"
"When you became the master of fish-braiding," Carter replied.
"You're lucky I love you."
"Aw, I love you too."
"Don't let it get to your head."
"Too late!"
Two hours later, Zyan was sitting at their table while everybody else was off hitting the dance floor. The wedding had been all right—lots of crying and sniffing, followed by amazing food and halfway decent music. Carol looked gorgeous in her white-and-blue dress, and Zyan had heard her mother breathe a sigh of relief in front of him when Carol's make-up had remained smudge-free throughout the exchange of vows.
The only thing Zyan could do without was the amount of wedding guests. There were at least two hundred people crammed into the venue, and he doubted they were all family, but since both he and Carter were invited, Zyan shouldn't have expected anything less. Carol was Ava and Jessica's employee-turned-friend, so Zyan and she had met every other week throughout the three years they'd known each other. Yet they'd never gone beyond shallow small talk and movie commentary, which was the reason for his surprise when he and Carter had received an invitation.
"Hello, young man, would you like to dance?"
Zyan's head shot up as he was torn from his musings. Oh no. "Um, sorry, I don't…"
The elderly person grabbed his hand and pulled him up. "You wouldn't turn down a lady now, would you?"
"Uh…"
She pulled him along to the dance floor.
Zyan watched on in horror and turned to look back at the table with longing before it disappeared behind a wall of moving bodies. He slowly turned to face the stranger pulling at him again. She was smiling. Zyan forced himself to return it.
Time seemed to move a lot slower from there.
He kept looking out at the people surrounding him in hopes of spotting someone who could save him. But no such luck. Instead, the lady's hands seemed to move suspiciously low on his back every now and again, forcing him to push her away a few inches, which made her tighten her grip on him and pull him uncomfortably close again. But at least it made her hands travel further north.
While they swayed to the music, she kept telling him about how beautiful her niece had looked, and how she had just gotten back from fixing her makeup because she'd cried so much during the ceremony.
He wished he hadn't told Carter to go dance with Jessica half an hour ago. It would have spared him this suffering. Oh god, he'd much rather be groped by his boyfriend.
He forced a smile again when the woman looked back up at him. He wished he could get rid of her without making a scene right about then.
When a brown hand finally tapped her on the shoulder, Zyan felt relief flood him.
"Excuse me," a pleasant, polite voice said. "May I cut in?"
The woman's eyes slowly traveled down until they landed on Ava. Her hair was still beautifully done up, though a few strands at her temples had come loose to frame her face.
At the sight of her, the hands fell away from Zyan. He quickly stepped back to reclaim his personal space.
"Of course," Carol's aunt said as she stepped aside.
Ava politely inclined her head and walked up to Zyan. "Much appreciated." She put a hand on his arm and began to guide him toward the edge of the dance floor.
"I just wish you'd shown up sooner," Zyan said as they stopped walking.
"Why didn't you just get away from her as soon as her hands started wandering?" Ava asked.
Zyan shrugged. "I didn't want to make a scene and ruin Carol's big day."
"Aww," Ava made. "Look at you being all sweet."
Zyan rolled his eyes, only to jump and nearly hurt himself when a hand suddenly fell on his shoulder.
"Hey, what are you two doing here?"
Zyan turned to look at Carter, whose brow was lined with pearls of sweat. He was breathing a little heavily. Zyan's brows rose at the sight of him. "Did you hit the gym in the middle of the reception?"
Carter chuckled. "No, I just got back from dancing with Jess. My fault for forgetting she used to take hip-hop dance classes when she was younger."
"In that case," Ava interrupted, "I better go find her and show her some of my moves."
Carter looked over at her and nodded. "Have fun! I think she went off to the drinks table."
Ava shot them a grin before she disappeared into the throng of people.
Carter wrapped his arms around Zyan's waist as soon as she was out of sight. "Finally."
Zyan turned slightly, until they were fully facing each other, chests brushing at the smallest of movements. "What do you mean?"
"I finally got you where I want you. On the dance floor. With me. And with no way of escaping."
"I could get away if I wanted to." Despite his words, he raised his arms and put them around Carter's neck.
"Then I'm glad you don't."
Zyan leaned forward to press their lips together. "After I just got felt up by Carol's aunt, I'd much rather be doing this for the rest of the day." Their lips nearly brushed with Zyan's every word.
Carter's nose wrinkled as he cringed. "I'd say 'yikes, she's twice your age,' but we both know that's a lie."
Zyan laughed and stole another kiss.
Carter hummed. "I love you."
"I love you too."