MY PARENTS ORDER MY favorite pizza to celebrate Harvard. The three of us eat in the backyard, the cardboard boxes piled on the ground in front of the firepit my dad decided to build three years ago and which we’ve used approximately twice. Jamie was at Ted’s house when I came home. Honestly, I was relieved she wasn’t there. We haven’t spoken since yesterday, and the thought of announcing my success to her definitely won’t help us reconcile.
Except for Jamie’s absence and the memory of Ethan’s . . . everything, the evening is exactly what I’ve been dreaming of.
“So, Alison,” my dad says, licking sauce from his fingers, “you happy?”
“I am.” It’s the truth. Even Ethan can’t change that. I’m proud of myself.
“No reservations about leaving California?” Mom asks.
“None.”
“What about leaving Dylan?” She leans back in her chair, passing the crust she doesn’t want to my dad.
I eye them, suspicious of this line of questioning. “We’ll visit each other.”
“How about your amazing parents? Will we be allowed to visit you?” She raises an eyebrow.
“She doesn’t have a choice,” Dad answers. “I’m looking forward to parents’ weekend already. We’ll get to hang out with her roommates, talk to random students in the dining hall . . .”
I roll my eyes, but it doesn’t sound terrible.
“Meet the people she’s made out with,” Mom adds.
“Oh, she’ll hate that,” Dad says.
The thought is mildly terrifying. “You think I’ll have multiple hookups by parents’ weekend? Isn’t that like a month into the semester?”
“We went to college once,” Dad says. “Hey, completely unrelated question, but where will Ethan Molloy be matriculating this fall?”
I grit my teeth. I knew the moment was coming. For the rest of my life, talking about Harvard will be tied to Ethan. “I don’t know where he’ll commit, but he got into Harvard if that’s what you’re asking.”
My dad’s face splits into a grin. He turns to my mom. “Pay up.”
To my horror, my mom pulls a twenty from her pocket and hands it to my dad.
“You bet on us?”
“On whether you’d be at the same school or not.” Mom shrugs. “Statistically, it seemed unlikely.”
As much as I desperately want to change the subject, a worse thought enters my mind. “Wait, have you bet on other things?”
“You’ll need to be more specific,” Mom replies.
“Related to my life. Specifically related to Ethan in my life.”
They exchange a glance that tells me everything.
“I could cut you in—” my dad starts, then stops when the sliding door opens and Jamie emerges.
“What’s going on out here?” Jamie asks. She doesn’t look in my direction.
“We’re celebrating!” Mom nudges my shoulder. “Alison, tell her.”
Jamie turns to me, perfectly polite. “I got into Harvard,” I say to her feet.
A day ago, Jamie would’ve rushed to hug me. Instead, she just plasters on a pleasant smile. “I’m happy for you.”
“Pizza?” My dad offers.
Jamie shakes her head. “Maybe later. I’m going to take a shower.” She leaves, sandals scraping the gravel loudly in the warm night.
“Are you guys in a fight?” my mom asks when Jamie closes the sliding door.
Watching the light go on in Jamie’s bedroom window, I push down the hurt that she won’t even celebrate Harvard with me. “A little one,” I say.
I do feel bad for how I upset her, but I still maintain she’s not looking at herself objectively. I don’t think me getting into Harvard helps. If anything, it’s going to remind her of what she could be doing right now but isn’t, and I don’t need to hear how she sees my sacrifices as a waste just because she didn’t like her own direction.
“Some unwanted parental advice,” my mom says. “Go easy on her. It’s difficult to watch your baby sister outpace you.”
I frown. I don’t like being told to diminish what I’m proud of. “I’m hardly outpacing her. She went to Columbia.”
“She did, and right now she’s living with her parents while her much younger sister is about to move out. It’s not like she’s happy she’s here.”
“She certainly acts like she is.”
My dad gives me a stern look. “You’re smarter than that. She may have recognized the job she had, even the relationship she was in, weren’t right, but that doesn’t mean she’s happy in this house, unsure of what’s next.”
“We’re all so proud of you, Alison,” my mom says. “Even Jamie. She’s just going through a lot right now, and we have to give her time. She’ll come around and be happy for you about Harvard. You know she will.”
“Fine.” I pick up my pizza. Even if my sister won’t celebrate, it doesn’t mean I shouldn’t.
My dad faces my mom. “Over-under on how long their fight lasts?”