"I'm going to kill him," Jasyn announced.
Clark looked up from his seat on the floor surrounded by brightly colored blocks that made various noises when shaken. Louie sat in front of him, his chubby hands banging blocks on the floor. The sound of tortured animals bleated from the blocks.
"Who?"
"Lowell, who else?" Jasyn sat at the table, the latest copy of the news spread in front of her.
"Why?" Clark asked carefully. His wife had a volatile temper.
"He promised. Dace was supposed to stay safe on Besht until we could get there. Leon told me that was his personal promise last time he talked to him." Leon was on his way to Besht, ahead of them, to make sure Lowell was keeping that promise. They'd been slowed by engine problems and the need to haul cargo to keep their business interests valid.
The sound of the blocks was too distracting. Clark stood, hauling Louie up in his arms.
"What game is he playing now?" Jasyn muttered.
Clark looked over her shoulder. The mem paper held the latest news from Linas-Drias. Plastered front and center was a picture of Dace in a silver uniform. She leaned against a man identified as Vance Shiropi. The headlines screamed about an engagement.
"Engaged?" Clark said. "To the son of the Speaker to the Council?"
"You don't recognize him? He's the one Lowell sent her off to the Sessimoniss with. I'm going to kill him."
"Lowell, Vance, or both?"
"Does it matter?"
"Not much, but if it's Lowell, I'll help. Dace would never get into something like that on her own. It would involve being social."
Jasyn shook her head. "Paltronis warned us she was different. Maybe she isn't the same person anymore. Maybe this is what she chose."
"And maybe she learned to cook. I won't believe it until I talk to her again."
"What are you suggesting?"
"That we go to Linas-Drias and talk to her."
"We go to Besht first," Jasyn said. She used her uncompromising voice, the one Clark knew not to argue with.
"It will take us two weeks. We have to make at least two stops on the way."
"Don't tell me my job," Jasyn snapped. "I can plot a course to get us there in ten days."
"Not unless Darus found another coolant regulator valve. We can't push the engines until the system is back to normal levels. Banging on the valve every ten minutes to keep it from sticking can't be good for it or the engine." He shifted Louie to one hip and rubbed her shoulder with his free hand. "No matter how hard you push things, it's going to take at least two weeks to get to Besht."
"And the story is already two weeks old." Jasyn's shoulders slumped. "I should have talked her out of listening to Lowell."
"She did what she had to, Jasyn."
"What is she doing now?" The hurt in her voice was clear despite the anger she used to mask it. "She doesn't belong there, she belongs here."
"Jasyn," Clark said gently, "maybe she doesn't anymore."
"Don't say that." She shoved the mem papers, sending them flying off the table to scatter on the floor. "Even if it is true," she added in a tiny voice.
Clark squeezed her shoulder. He could hear the others coming back to the ship. She took a deep breath, getting her emotions under control.
"Success!" Darus announced from the hatch. "We found a brand new, factory perfect valve. Considering they haven't made the things for fifteen years, I consider that a small miracle."
Hatches banged outside. Clark turned to face the older man. Darus was Dace's father. He needed to be told the latest news about his daughter.
"Ginni says to tell you they spent too much on food, but Twyla insisted it was edible. She said it even tastes pretty good." Darus grinned as he hefted a greasy box and headed for the engine room. He was oblivious to the mood in the room. Just like Dace, Clark thought.
"Darus," he said to get the man's attention.
Darus stopped. He put the box carefully on the floor. Each movement was exaggerated. Darus wasn't as oblivious as Clark had thought.
"What about Dace this time?" he asked. "She was in the hospital. How much trouble can she get into if she can't even get out of bed without help?"
Clark shook his head, unable to answer that question.
"She's getting married," Jasyn said.
"What?" Darus darted across the lounge and grabbed up the mem paper from the floor. His voice was hard, anger mixed with hurt. "That's not Tayvis. She wouldn't do that without at least telling me."
"Are we interrupting?" Beryn asked from the doorway. "The cargo's stowed," he added to Clark. "We're set to go when you're ready."
The rest of the crew came through the hatch. Ginni laughed at something Twyla said. Finn walked behind them, grinning down at Ginni though she was turned away from him.
Finn was new, hired only a couple of months earlier. So far, he hadn't proven himself. He was capable enough, but he didn't understand. And he didn't listen.
Finn leaned over Ginni as she put fresh food away in the galley. She kept her head down, not looking at him. The two of them were the only ones who hadn't sensed the change in mood in the lounge of the ship. Beryn and Twyla watched Darus and Jasyn.
"What is it now?" Beryn asked. "Another letter from Lowell?"
"News sheets," Clark answered.
Darus crumpled the mem paper in his fist. He threw it at the table. "How soon can we get to Besht if I get that new valve installed?" he asked Jasyn, his voice flat and angry.
"Eight days if we can push the engine," she answered.
He nodded. He stomped down the stairs to the engine room, snagging the valve on the way.
"Why are we in a hurry to get to Besht?" Finn asked.
Twyla and Beryn retrieved the crumpled paper and smoothed it out.
"Because Lowell owes us answers," Jasyn said sharply. She shoved herself out of her chair, stalking towards the cockpit of the ship.
"This is about Dace, isn't it?" Finn asked. "We're going to drop everything, including a cargo that still needs delivered, to run off and ask questions about her."
"You have a problem with that?" Clark asked him, deceptively mild.
"The cargo isn't due on New Haven for another month," Twyla said over her shoulder. "We can get someone else to take it for us once we get it to Besht."
"We'll stop somewhere for fuel and transfer it there," Clark said. "You want to say something, Finn?"
"It's stupid," Finn said. "You're losing money, good money, to chase after someone who isn't even here and hasn't been for over a year. It's ridiculous. You keep her cabin the same. You have all her things still in lockers. It's like a shrine to her. She's gone and she's not coming back but you're all too infatuated to face the truth."
His words echoed in the room. There was silence for a long moment.
"You're welcome to leave," Clark said.
"There aren't any good positions here," Finn said. "I'd be stranded for months."
"It's better than being dead," Twyla said.
Finn blinked, caught by surprise at her comment.
"If Jasyn heard you, she'll kill you," Ginni added. "And I'll help."
"You're crazy," Finn said. "All of you. You won't face the truth. I think she never was part of your crew. You're waiting for a phantom to show up."
"Get out," Clark told him. "Your contract is terminated."
"You don't have the authority to do that," Finn said belligerently. "And you won't leave me here. This world is barely civilized."
"Then you should have thought about what you said," Jasyn said, rejoining them. "Get off my ship. You've got five minutes to collect your things."
Finn shook his head. "You won't leave me. You need me. Darus is a half-baked engineer who doesn't know anything about hyper engines or tuning your sublight drive. Beryn is passable, but he isn't what you need, either. You need a real engineer, like me. Who else is going to keep this tub of bolts flying if you leave me behind?"
"We managed before, we'll manage now. Five minutes." Jasyn turned her back on Finn. "We're lifting in fifteen."
Ginni and Beryn went out the hatch to check that the ship was secured. Twyla went down to the engine to help Darus. Clark stood his ground, facing Finn. Louie chewed his fist and drooled down Clark's neck.
"You're crazy," Finn said. "All of you."
"I believe the owner terminated your contract," Clark said. "If you aren't off this ship in five minutes, we'll have you arrested for trespassing."
Finn's face tightened with anger. He shoved his way past Clark to his cabin. The sound of lockers being slammed open and emptied mixed with his muttered comments.
Clark put Louie back on the floor and gathered the blocks, shoving them into the bottom locker with the other toys. Louie grabbed for them. Clark handed him his stuffed cat instead. Louie clutched it and chewed on a well-worn ear.
Their real cat, Ghost, appeared from nowhere as usual. She meowed at him. Clark scratched her head. Louie grabbed for her. She slipped away, jumping up to her favorite perch high overhead.
"I still say you're crazy," Finn said as he stomped his way off the ship.
"Probably," Clark agreed though Finn was too far away to hear. He crossed the lounge and shut the hatch.
"Adaba," Louie announced, banging his toy on the floor. The soft cat made no sound. "Adaba," Louie said again, looking up at Clark with his clear blue eyes.
"We're going again, yes," Clark told his son. "Let's get you tucked away."
The area behind the cockpit held a crib, padded on the bottom, with the sides and top enclosed by a mesh webbing. He put Louie inside.
"Fofl?" Louie asked.
"Fofl," Clark agreed. He touched a control panel. A singing, dancing blue rabbit appeared in front of a small screen. Louie sighed happily and lay down. His thumb popped into his mouth. Clark fastened the top screen shut. With any luck Louie would fall asleep.
He went into the cockpit and slid into the pilots chair. Jasyn sat at the navigation station, her head in her hands. He ran his hands down the sides of the control panel. There was a small bin at the top. Its clear front showed several seashells inside. Dace had collected them on the day Lady Rina died. He opened the bin and took out a delicately swirled pink shell. It was smooth inside and rough outside. He ran his fingers over the shell.
"Finn may be right," he said. "Maybe it is time to let her go."
"Don't say that." Jasyn's voice was harsh.
"It's been well over a year, Jasyn," he said as gently as he could. "We can't keep listing her as captain when she isn't here."
Jasyn turned her head away from him, letting her long, dark hair veil her face. "This was her dream, Trevyn. She convinced me I could dream it, too."
Clark swiveled his chair around to face her. He reached across her controls to brush the hair out of her face. He tucked it behind her ear. She'd been crying. She was still the most beautiful woman he'd ever met.
"I can't give up on her," Jasyn told him. "Not until she tells me herself she's through." She blinked, looking around the cockpit at the complicated control panels. "She talked me into buying this ship. It was a stripped down hulk, rusting away in a junkyard. She convinced me it would fly, that it was a good ship. She rebuilt the engines herself. She loved this ship. She saw possibilities in it I couldn't begin to imagine. She did the same thing with people, without even trying." Her voice trailed away into silence.
Clark took her hand, squeezing it gently.
"I have to hear her say it," Jasyn repeated.
"I know. Which is why we're going to stop at Tebros and convince someone else to finish hauling our cargo. And this time, no one's going to stop us from finding her. Not even Lowell."
"He promised me she'd be on Besht." Jasyn's face hardened. "He promised me she wouldn't be gone more than a few weeks."
"I'll hold him while you kick him." Clark cocked his head to the side. "Do you think Paltronis will try to help us or stop us? She does work for him."
"I think she'll help us this time," Jasyn answered. "She was furious with him when I talked to her last. She was there, on Tivor, with Dace. She knows what they did to her."
She slipped her hand free from his only to knot it together with her other hand in her lap. Paltronis was also the one who had warned them that Dace wasn't the same person who had left their ship for Serrimonia. She wouldn't say how Dace had changed, only that she wasn't the same. The only information they had been able to get was that Dace may have suffered brain damage when she was shot. Only time would tell how bad it was.
"How could she do that to Tayvis?" Jasyn asked after a strained silence. "She loved him."
Clark didn't know how to answer that.
"When I first met her, she had nightmares. She was in love with him way back then, even if she wouldn't admit it to herself. She said his name in her sleep." She looked up at Clark. "Do you know anything about Vance Shiropi?"
"He was a bit of a jerk when he came to pick her up, but Lowell trusted him. I don't know anything about him, Jasyn."
"If she's playing some kind of game." Her voice trailed off. She stared down at her controls. "Lowell's behind it, I know it. I want to know what he did to her on Tivor."
"I'll help you beat it out of him." Clark clicked the com button. "How's the repair coming?" he asked when Twyla answered.
"Another ten minutes and we should have it," his sister told him.
"I'll start preflight," he said, to both her and Jasyn.
Jasyn didn't answer. She sat still, her arms wrapped around herself as if she were cold. Her eyes stared into the distance at something only she could see. It hurt him to see her that way. She loved Dace, they were closer than sisters. He didn't understand what could possibly have happened to keep Dace away from Jasyn. He was going to find out, though, no matter what it took. He wanted his wife to smile again.