In the morning Mum had to go to work, even though everything was going wrong at the station. Dad had stayed out all night with the fellas. Emily, Bobbie, the Pommie and me were in the dining room eating our brekkie. The everybody jam didn’t taste as sweet as normal.
When the phone rang, we all stopped what we were doing. We knew the only person who’d ring at that time was Aunty Ve. And if it was Aunty Ve, she’d only be calling about one thing – the baby. Bobbie answered it because she was the oldest. Emily, the Pommie and me got up and went to the kitchen to listen. Bobbie said, ‘G’day, Timber Creek Station … It’s on its way already? … Right. Yep … OK. I’ll tell them … OK … Take care. Bye.’
She gave us a quick look and then swapped the phone for the radio, to see if she could catch Mum before she got all the way to Marlu Hill. Bobbie said into the little black receiver, ‘Come in, Sue, Timber Creek to Sue. You read me? Over.’ There was nothing coming back except the crackly desert noises, so she tried again. Eventually Mum’s voice fizzed and said, ‘Go ahead, Bobbie. Everything OK? Over.’
Bobbie said, ‘You need to come home. Over.’ I guess Mum knew that was Bobbie’s way of telling her Sissy’s baby was coming early, without the rest of the Territory understanding what was going on.
The Pommie said something to Bobbie about getting some food together for Mum to take with her for the journey to Alice. That’s when Emily asked what for, so Bobbie explained that Mum would have to go to Alice to be with Sissy because the baby was on its way. Emily looked confused. Bobbie said Sissy needed Mum with her when she went to hospital to have the baby. She reckoned Mum would only be gone a few days or so. I was mad when I heard that. I couldn’t help it – before I knew what I was doing I’d shouted out, ‘BUT IT’S THE MUSTER – WE NEED HER HERE!’ That’s when Emily started to blub. Bobbie rolled her eyes at me as she squatted down to give Emily a hug. Bobbie reckoned we both had to act real grown-up because we were going to have a niece or a nephew soon. She said we all had to pull together. It didn’t feel like Sissy or her gin baby were pulling together.
Before we’d finished washing our breakfast plates, Mum got home. She burst through the door and ran into the kitchen. She grabbed the phone straight off the wall and rang Aunty Veronica without even speaking to us. She said the same things Bobbie had said to Aunty Ve a few minutes earlier, except Mum finished by saying, ‘Don’t worry, love, I’m on my way.’
We watched Mum run into the bathroom to get her toothbrush and a bottle of shampoo. She threw them in a bag. She dropped that by the door and went back into the kitchen. First she radioed Dad. When he answered she just said, ‘Derek, I’ve got to go to Alice. They’re ready.’ There was a pause before Dad replied, ‘You’re kidding?’ Neither of them said anything for a moment, then at the same time as Dad asked if Sissy was OK, Mum said she was sorry, but she had to go. I guess we all knew Mum couldn’t be in two places at once – I just couldn’t believe she would leave the station when everything was going wrong. Dad said, ‘Drive carefully and phone later. Over and out.’
Then Mum phoned the clinic at Marlu Hill. She said she wouldn’t be going in because she had to go to Alice. She didn’t need to explain anything else. Then she wiped the tears off Emily’s cheeks with her thumb and said we had to listen to Bobbie and Liz and do what they told us to. We all went outside and watched Mum get in the Ford. She was still in her work clothes. The electric window zoomed down as she reversed. Once she was pointing in the right direction, she shouted out to us, ‘Look after each other. I’ll call you tonight.’ The engine revved and her arm waved from the open window as she drove away through the dust cloud.
Long before we all got to Cockatoo Creek we knew the fire was still burning because we could see a big pile of brown smoke moving straight up into the sky – floating like a feather. It was already hot. I pointed at the smoke and said, ‘At least it’s a still day.’ I watched the smoke get bigger and bigger until eventually, as we got nearer to Cockatoo Creek Dam, we could smell it. The Pommie closed her window and told me to do the same, but barbecue and bonfire smells still wafted into the ute. It got so strong, it made my eyes water.
No one had said much on the way over to Cockatoo Creek, but when we pulled into the yards and saw the pile of dead cattle waiting to be burned, it was like someone sucked the air out of the desert. I couldn’t breathe. We got out of the ute, and I guess it was a bit like when Jonny died – no one knew what to say.
I’d never seen so many carcasses. They were piled up like horrible fire wood – waiting to be burned. I knew Emily would blub. As soon as she did, Bobbie got back into the ute and sat with her on her knee. I guess on a day like that, the yards weren’t really a place for a little kid like Emily. Not long afterwards, Bobbie took Emily back to the station. I looked at the Pommie and she seemed whiter than normal. Her mouth was open and she looked a bit like when you can’t catch your breath. I felt my chest tighten then, so I sucked on my inhaler as I studied the pile of carcasses. It looked like a horror movie – only it was real. The loader appeared then out of the bush, piled high with more dead.
I looked at the fire, and there was Dick, crawling round the edge like a little ant. He had a shovel in his hand. He was using it to manage the fire, to stoke the hot ashes and make sure it didn’t get out of control. His hands were black and he had grey marks all over his shirt. He’d taken his overalls off at the top, so the arms were tied round his waist, but he still wore the blue legs. It was hot work standing in the sun poking a fire, and I wondered about his rattly chest.
Reg was putting the finishing touches to the yards. Everyone had the same look on their face. Water was getting warm in the line of troughs inside the fences. The tanker had gone. I went over to where Dad was. I asked him where the tanker was, and he said it would be at Wild Ridge, filling up again. He said they’d have to keep going back there to get more water to take to Gum Tree Dam too. He rubbed his face and said things were so bad on the eastern side of the station that he’d decided there was no way we could continue without a helicopter. He reckoned we could herd the cattle faster from the air than on the ground. They couldn’t hide from us up there, so we’d spend less time looking for them and chasing after them. I guess the quicker it was, the less cattle we’d lose. Dad said it would be worth the money. I nodded so he knew I understood and then asked what he wanted us to do to help. He shrugged and said it was hard to know what to do for the best. That probably scared me more than anything. Dad always knew what to do.
Mary arrived then. She’d come to make sure her dad, Dick, was OK. He was holding a dirty hanky over his face when she arrived. Mary handed him a supply of tablets in a little box, which Penny had sent to keep him going. He started coughing and he sounded like his chest was trying to jump out of his throat. Mary looked worried and reckoned Dick had been working too hard. Dad agreed and said Dick should go home with Mary, or he’d have Penny to answer to. Dick looked at the hanky he’d been coughing into and then carefully folded it up. He didn’t look too happy about it, but he went with Mary anyway.
Dad took the shovel Dick had been using and went to keep an eye on the fire. I saw another in the back of Elliot’s ute, so I ran to get it. I followed him to the fire and asked again what we were going to do. He reckoned the only thing we could do was pin our hopes on the helicopter turning things around. He explained how some of the fellas were with the Crofts out at Gum Tree, clearing the dead out there. The Crofts had brought their tanker in from Gold River to make sure there was water at Gum Tree. I knew that was a real kind thing to do. If we were suffering on the eastern side of the station that meant the Crofts would be having a tough time on the west of theirs. I asked Dad if they were OK over there at Gold River and he shrugged. He reckoned it wasn’t good, but they hadn’t got the same problems as us – none of their water holes or dams had gone dry – yet.
The Pommie had come over with us to the fire. She’d tied a scarf round her face. She wouldn’t look at the piles of carcasses around us. She said in a muffled voice how she’d really like to do something to help. Dad reckoned the best thing she could do would be to boil a kettle and get some tucker organised. He said, ‘An army marches on its stomach.’ I guess we were kind of at war.
Dad and me kept walking round and round that bonfire, making sure the dead were burned and we didn’t start a bushfire. Every now and then, if I felt a slight breeze, I’d feel sick. I was scared we’d have no cattle left, but I couldn’t even let myself think about what would happen if a bushfire started. Everything was so dry, I knew it would spread faster than the drought.
Lloyd kept appearing from the bush in the loader with more and more carcasses. With each load, I got more and more worried. I wondered if all our cattle out there had died.
Reg came over to tell us the Pommie reckoned smoko was ready. Dad told me to go and get myself some tucker. I told him he looked like he needed it more than me. I reckoned he hadn’t slept all night. He smiled and told me he was OK. Someone had to stay with the fire at all times. Reg nodded, so I stuck my shovel in the ground and went to get some food.
It felt strange sitting there eating the food without everyone else. Dad and Reg had decided the best thing to do was to split the team up, so they could clear out both Gum Tree and Cockatoo Creek Dams at the same time. It was important we got rid of the dead and got water for the cattle that were left as quickly as possible. Reg said it was a race against time. So, as soon as most of the work was done at Cockatoo Creek, Dad had sent the fellas over to Gum Tree to get things sorted out over there. That meant there was only Reg, Dad and Lloyd left at Cockatoo Creek, putting the finishing touches to the yards and burning the carcasses.
As we ate the sandwiches the Pommie had made, no one really said much. Lloyd reckoned there weren’t too many more carcasses in the bush around Cockatoo Creek. I realised there wouldn’t be many live ones, either – that made it hard to swallow my food. I guess we all knew there wouldn’t be much to muster. Then Elliot’s voice came through on the radio. Reg answered it. Elliot reckoned they needed Dad to go over to Gum Tree. They needed to know what he wanted them to do. Elliot said there were as many, if not more, dead over there. Reg swore when he heard that. Elliot said the Crofts reckoned that instead of burning the carcasses, it might be quicker to dig a pit in the desert, as far away from the dam as possible, and bury them. Reg took a deep breath and told Elliot he and Dad would be over at Gum Tree right away.
I felt like my eyes were going to burst out of my head. I looked up and saw the Pommie staring at me and I could tell she understood how serious things were. She looked as scared as I felt. I just hoped no one could see it on my face. Lloyd, Reg and me went over to the fire to talk to Dad. When Dad heard what Reg had to say, his head dropped and he looked at the ground for a moment. I wondered if he’d decided there was no point. But then he said, ‘Right, well we’d better get over there.’ I saw his face had hardened. His jaw kind of jutted forward, like when he was angry. I guess he hadn’t given up. He looked at me and said he was counting on me to look after the fire – ‘Do not take your eyes off it, you hear?’ he said. I nodded. He told Lloyd to finish off moving the carcasses as quickly as he could because it sounded like they’d need the loader at Gum Tree Dam. Then he and Reg got in a bull catcher and sped off into the desert.
I was glad Dad had let me be in charge of the fire. It was a real important job. There was no way I was going to screw it up. I walked round and round, making sure not a single spark or a bit of hot ash got away. I made sure every hoof and horn, each tail, ear and eyeball, everything, was burned. I wanted to make sure there wasn’t even the slightest trace of the drought left.
When Lloyd dumped the last load of the carcasses onto the fire, he jumped down from the loader and told me he was going to Gum Tree. I nodded. He looked at me and asked if I’d be OK with the fire on my own. I nodded again. I knew what I was doing. I told him it was hot, but that was all. He punched me gently on the shoulder and said I was a good kid.
I heard the noise of the loader grow quieter and quieter as he drove away, until I couldn’t hear anything any more, except for the cracks and fizzes from the carcasses on the fire in front of me. As I looked at the pile of smoking legs, stinking bodies and breathed in the horrible, sweet smell of burning fur, I thought about Mum and wondered where she was now.