“The most precious possession that ever comes
To a man in this world
Is a woman’s heart.”
JOSIAH G. HOLLAND
Your Project
She gets to pick the movie, TV show, or whatever she would like to do on the couch.
Guys, make sure you can dedicate a reasonable amount of time to this activity. No fair watching the clock or accidently changing the channel to The Deadliest Catch while she’s getting the popcorn. (Hey, why is she getting the popcorn in the first place? This is a full-service evening.) Don’t worry, your day is just around the corner.
Purpose of the Project
Couch time is a celebration of the best kind of love—comfortable love. See how author Paula Friedrichsen describes comfortable love in her book The Man You Always Wanted Is the One You Already Have:
Comfortable love is like coming home after a hard day’s work to the smell of beef stew simmering in the Crock-Pot. Comfortable love is like changing out of a business suit, nylons, and high heels into flannel jammies and fluffy slippers. Comfortable love is like coming in from a raging winter storm to a cozy home warmed by a crackling fire.
In a day and age where the siren song of modern media promises women true and lasting happiness based on their income, material possessions, bust size, or hair color—marriage offers us comfortable love.
Yesterday was Jeff’s and my twenty-first wedding anniversary. We will go out to dinner next Saturday night to celebrate, and then snuggle on the couch to watch a movie together. And this is perfect. This is enough. This is my marriage.
You may be underwhelmed by our celebration plans. Maybe you’re wondering, Where’s the trip to Paris? or Where’s the diamond anniversary band? (You know… like on the Zales commercial.) or Won’t there be a surprise getaway to a cozy bed and breakfast, where Jeff has arranged for chilled champagne and draws you a bubble bath?
Uh…no. You see, that’s just not Jeff’s style. But he more than makes up for it. Because while unrealistic expectations and perfection in body and home are foisted upon women at every turn, my husband accepts me as I am. In a culture where an extreme makeover promises us fulfillment and happiness, my husband offers lasting love and enduring security.
Now don’t get me wrong, if my mate surprised me with a trip to Paris, I would have my beret on before we hit the car door. Surprises are great, and wild romance is many a girl’s dream. But life is good when I can rest my head in my husband’s lap and feel secure in the knowledge that I am loved.
Dear God, I pray that not only do I grow in passion with my partner, but also in comfort.
Getting Creative
• Ask your wife earlier in the week what she would like your couch time to look like. Maybe it’s watching a movie or just sitting and talking for a little while.
• If it’s a movie, make sure you have it in your collection, ordered it from Netflix, or can pick it up at the library.
• Go the extra mile and have a favorite snack waiting. Chocolate usually works.
Project Reports
“I have to tell you I was not looking forward to this one. I thought for sure we would be watching some chick flick, but she put on a movie we had seen when we were dating. I got her Taco Bell nachos (her favorite), and we just relaxed. Great evening—for both of us.”—Rod
Your Plan for the Project (copy your plan into your Project Planner)
Results (mate’s reaction, my reaction)