I am so lonely, I feel I will go mad with it. How have I stood here all these years, never even noticing how alone I am?
I thought of my mother earlier today, and such a wave of anguish shuddered through me that I found myself sobbing and gasping as though she was being torn out of my hands that very moment. But she was never torn; she left of her own accord. I see now, in a way I never did in life, that it was my father she was fleeing. But she left me behind, and with a man she knew would not care for me. I hate her.
Jack must come and stay with me. I will have someone of my own, someone who won’t leave me. Not ever.