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TWO WEEKS LATER, RUTH was on a cozy love seat in a Green Valley coffee shop. It was her fifth date with Carter. In addition to the evening they’d first met, they’d had lunch together twice and gone to the annual symphony in the park together last weekend.
Tonight they’d had a romantic dinner at an upscale restaurant overlooking the lake. Afterward, they’d held hands as they walked around town—making sure they were widely observed by the curious residents of town—and ended up at Roasted, where they’d split a cupcake and tried to act like one of those obnoxiously sappy couples Ruth had always rolled her eyes about.
If this were a real relationship, Ruth would be over the moon about how well it was going. Even recognizing it was fake, she was enjoying herself more than she would have imagined. It felt like she and Carter were mischievous children, knowing they were being a little bit naughty and relishing it all the more because of it.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had so much fun.
“You want another one?” Carter asked, licking the last of the cream cheese icing off his fingertips. He had very good fingers. Long and agile and strong. He also had a really good mouth.
She couldn’t help but watch with visceral interest as he sucked one of his fingers in a brief, casual move. There had never been anything overtly sexual in his interaction with Ruth for the past two weeks. He wasn’t that kind of guy. He was thoughtful. Careful. Decent. Always buttoned-up and holding tight to whatever he was feeling. Which made the thoughtless gesture with the icing all the more distracting since it hit her out of the blue with a wave of physical attraction.
She ignored it. Of course she did. Carter was a handsome man, and noticing that fact from time to time was inevitable. But she had no real interest in someone who was still hung up on his brother’s wife. A man who’d never fall for a woman like her even if he were emotionally available.
She might still be fairly young, but she’d lived most of her twenty-six years knowing daydreams and fairy tales didn’t come true. After all, when her dad had walked out when she was six, she’d spent the following year hoping and dreaming and praying he’d come back and make them a family again.
He never had.
More often than not, people let you down. Especially when you expected them to change.
Or expected them to fall in love with you.
She wasn’t going to go down that road, no matter how hot Carter was, sucking his finger.
“Is something wrong?” he asked, his dark eyebrows pulling together with that questioning concern that she’d learned was typical for him.
“No. Of course not.” Ruth had to hand it to Carter. Despite his innate consideration of other people, he was adorably clueless about what she was actually thinking. He had no idea she was lusting after him right now. “I was just trying to decide about another cupcake. But I’m pretty full, and if I eat any more, I might feel sick.”
“Okay.” They’d been sitting quite close together in the interest of acting their parts, but now Carter eased back some so he could turn to face her. “Are you ready to take off, or do you want to hang out a little more? You think we’ve done enough?”
She searched his face quickly, satisfying herself that he wasn’t trying to get away from her in his always courteous way. “Let’s stay a little longer. It’s still kind of early. If this is going to work, then we have to be convincing.”
“Okay.” He set down his empty coffee cup on a side table and then relaxed back against the cushions of the love seat. He reached over to pick up her hand and held it, gently stroking her palm with his fingers.
It felt good. Ridiculously good. A little throbbing awoke between her legs, and she felt her cheeks flushing.
Maybe he saw her reaction. Or sensed it. Because he asked very softly, “Is this okay? Should I have asked first?”
“It’s fine.” She moved closer so they could talk without the risk of anyone overhearing. “You don’t have to ask my permission to hold my hand.”
“Okay.” His brown eyes never left her face. It was so unnerving. The way he always seemed to search for what she was thinking, how she was feeling inside. She wasn’t used to that from men. From anyone. “Just checking. Just tell me if you feel weird about anything. I know we don’t know each other very well, and we’ve trapped ourselves in this artificial closeness.”
“Yeah, but I feel like I know you better than I did.” She smiled, studiously ignoring the tingles of pleasure his touch was still generating. She rubbed his thigh in a flirtatious manner but didn’t let the touch linger. “And you’re not the worst person to get close to, if you want to know the truth.”
His smile was surprised, authentic. “Yeah?”
She rolled her eyes and shook her head. “How is it you manage to come across as so unassuming when you have to know you’re the romantic hero for half the Green Valley daydreams?”
He chuckled. “Let’s not exaggerate.”
“I’m not exaggerating. I’m telling you it’s true. Even I, who am mostly immune to your charms, had more than one choice daydream about you back in high school.”
“Yeah?” He straightened up, leaning toward her slightly like he really wanted to hear this.
“Yes. I told you that before.”
“Sure, but I figured you were just saying it. I thought you were into Lincoln.”
“I was. I mean, just from a distance. He’s hot, and I was always into bad boys. But that didn’t mean I didn’t have silly fantasies about you too.”
“Fantasies?” The rough texture to his voice made her shiver.
“Not those kinds of fantasies.” She pulled her hand away from his since his touch was clearly interfering with the clarity of her thinking. “Romantic fantasies. About you rescuing me from bad guys and falling helplessly in love. Bringing me flowers and jewelry and breaking into song to express your great love for me.”
He burst into warm laughter. It felt like a victory. “You’re kidding.”
His appreciation of her humor was going right to her head. She was warm and flushed and happy as she scooted a little closer to him, snuggling up at his side. “I’m not kidding. I was a silly teenager. My daydreams matched my maturity level. But they were just daydreams. Nothing serious. I mean, I didn’t know you at all, and you had no idea who I was.”
“And I’m not really your type.” Carter said the words with a matter-of-fact complacency that made it clear he wasn’t hurt by this assessment.
“No. Not really. Which is the only way our plan can work. Neither of us can be wanting something more than helping each other out.”
He gave a brief nod. “Right. Got it.” He paused and asked in a different tone, “So do you always go for the bad boys then?”
Ruth shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I’ve always leaned in that direction. Not that any of them have ever worked out for me.”
“Why not?”
“Why not? What kind of question is that?”
“It’s a real question. Why shouldn’t it be?”
She’d never met another mature man who could come across as so sincere while still being sharp and intelligent. She had no idea how Carter managed it. “Because how is a person supposed to know why her attempts at romantic relationships don’t work out?”
“Some people know.”
“Do you?”
“No. I really don’t.”
“Me either,” she admitted. “I mean, I think I’m basically a nice, smart, relatively attractive person. But I think I mentioned this before. The guys I really like never like me. And the guys who do like me, just don’t...” She sighed. “They just don’t do it for me. I call it bad luck.”
“How do you know the guys you like don’t like you? Maybe they do, and you just don’t realize it.”
She gave him an impatient look. “Oh, I know.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I...” She cleared her throat. “I’m not exactly the most subtle of women. I say what I think. Sometimes I say a lot more than I should. If I’m into a guy, he knows.”
Carter tilted his head down so his face was only inches from hers. “Yeah? So you prefer to make the moves?”
“No. I do not prefer to make the moves. I’d much rather a man make the moves. But they never do. So then I tie myself into mental knots about exactly what you’re implying. Maybe the guy is into me and he doesn’t know I’m interested. What if I’m waiting around and letting a good thing slip away? So I...” She felt her cheeks burning as way too many cringe-worthy memories exploded in her mind. “I’ve been known to humiliate myself from time to time.”
“What have you done?” Carter didn’t look remotely surprised or uncomfortable or put off. He seemed fascinated. “Called guys up? Followed them around?”
She giggled, feeling better that he thought it was funny and not distasteful. “Occasionally. Not like I’m a stalker or anything. I’ve always had enough sense to stop before it got inappropriate. But I’ve called guys up and left rambling messages, practically throwing myself at them. I’ve shown up where I knew they’d be. I’ve even asked them out occasionally. None of that is... I mean, I think it’s fairly normal, and I don’t think it’s inappropriate. Just ended up embarrassing for me because the guys weren’t interested. What’s worse...”
She cleared her throat, feeling her cheeks still burning and knowing Carter would be able to see that. She shot him a quick look and saw he was waiting, that little concerned frown on his face. She took a breath and continued, “What I’d say is more of a mistake is too often I’ve held out hope for guys when I knew better. I knew better. They said yes when I asked them out, but they never initiated anything themselves. They were just going along with it because it was easy. I’ve had sex with guys who clearly just wanted a casual fling, but I convinced myself they’d fall for me soon. They’d want it to be serious. If I just held out, they’d... they’d... But of course they never did. I’ve assumed that guys were going to change for me when anyone with sense would know that they wouldn’t.”
Carter picked up her hand again while she spoke. This time he didn’t caress it. Just held it in an oddly comforting gesture.
She swallowed, not quite able to meet his eyes. “I think I’m basically a strong person. I mean, I’ve always been independent. People think I’m competent. And I’m not silly or naive or even particularly optimistic. Even back when I was doing all this with guys. I’d know—I really do know—that it’s better to be by myself than to be with a guy who isn’t going to make my life better. But...” She didn’t know why she was babbling out this very intimate confession, but it felt safe enough with Carter for her to continue. “But sometimes I would just... I would feel alone. And I’d get scared if I didn’t do everything to make it happen, I’d end up missing out. I’d have to stay alone. So despite my skepticism about romance, I just kept... chasing after it. And it makes me take whatever they want to offer—even if it’s not what I want—and pretend it’s enough.”
Her eyes were burning. It was ridiculous. Why the hell was she so emotional about this? And why was she telling Carter?
She sniffed and gave him a wobbly smile. “So I’ve done a lot of things I wish I hadn’t. I haven’t protected my heart enough. For this past year, I’ve been trying not to feel that way. I’ve been trying to be happy with myself. Moving here, it felt like a fresh start. That helped. I left all my embarrassments and disappointments back in Charlotte. Here, I’m going to be better. If I ever start dating again, I’ll do better.” She blinked, realizing she’d been talking for way too long. “Sorry about the rambles. I’m not sure why I felt the need to spill all that.”
He slid an arm around her shoulders and gave her a half hug. “I’m glad you did. I never would have guessed that about you. You always seem so...”
“So what?”
“So settled in your own skin. Like a man is the last thing in the world you need. Does that make sense?”
“Maybe.” She leaned her head against him. It was supposed to be an act, but it felt nice. Supportive. “My mom used to tell me the same thing, but I could never figure out what to do about it. And when I’m genuinely needy, they all just run away. I don’t know. I think I’m just hopeless.”
“Unfortunately I can’t help you with relationships since I’ve had no luck either.”
“I know for sure it’s not because girls aren’t interested in you. So at least you’ve got that going for you.”
“I suppose. But if they’re just going for that Prince Charming fantasy you talked about, I’m not sure how much that helps me. Who wants a relationship with someone who’s just looking for a fantasy?” He sounded tired. Stretched. Like it really bothered him.
“Yeah. That doesn’t sound great. But when girls get to know the real you, they’re going to like you. I guarantee it.”
He huffed with dry amusement. “If you say so.”
She pulled away so she could glare up at him. “I do say so. I know better than you.”
He laughed again, warmer this time. “Okay. I’m learning not to argue with you when you have that particular look.”
The comment completely distracted her from the righteousness of her indignation. “What look?”
“Your jaw goes out and your eyes narrow. It’s a fierce look. Very intimidating. It means you mean business.”
“It can’t be that intimidating if you’re sitting there laughing at it.”
“Hey, I’m not arguing with you anymore, am I?”
“I guess not.”
“So the look worked.”
She wanted to keep glaring at him, but for some reason she laughed instead. A quick glance around the coffee shop proved that a lot of people were covertly observing them. A few weren’t being covert about it at all. “People are watching us.”
“I know. Hopefully, we’re being convincing enough.”
“Maybe we should kiss a little.”
His eyebrows went up.
“I mean, we don’t have to,” she hurried on, wondering if she’d just embarrassed herself again in the way she’d resolved not to do anymore. “If it’s too weird, we can probably make do without it. I was just thinking if this was a real date... we might... I mean...”
She was saved from trying to finish her stilted explanation by Carter taking her face in both his hands and kissing her.
It was a good kiss. A really good kiss. So good that it knocked the breath out of her.
His lips were gentle at first, like he was testing her responses, giving her the chance to pull away. When she didn’t, he grew more insistent. One of his hands slid back to tangle his fingers in her loose hair, holding her head steady so he could move his mouth more urgently.
Ruth responded. She couldn’t help it. Waves of pure pleasure washed over her as she raised a hand to hold on to his neck and pushed back against his kiss. When his tongue slid over her lips, she made a silly sound. Embarrassingly close to a moan into his mouth.
When his tongue darted between her lips—for just a couple of seconds—her whole body throbbed. She wanted more. A lot more. She was just about to open her mouth to him when Carter pulled back with a rough inhalation.
They stared at each other. Motionless except their urgent breathing.
Then Carter blinked. “Uh.”
At least she wasn’t the only one taken aback by that kiss. Reminding herself that she wasn’t going to go down that same road she always took—the one that led to her humiliating herself by chasing a man who didn’t want her—she smiled at him. “Wow. You’re a good kisser.”
Her casual, friendly tone broke through the lingering tension from the kiss. Carter chuckled and leaned back against the cushion of the love seat, visibly relaxing. “You’re not bad yourself. I didn’t expect that.”
“You didn’t expect me to be a good kisser?”
“No! That’s not what I meant. I meant I didn’t expect it to be good under these circumstances. I didn’t intend to—”
“I know. I get it.” She laughed to smooth over his obvious concern at hurting her feelings. He really was very sweet. She’d never known a guy like him before. “I know exactly what you mean. I didn’t expect it either. But it will make it easier going forward.”
She was pleased. Proud of herself. She was handling this exactly right. Keeping it in perspective so she could enjoy herself and not get hurt. So she went on, “So if we need to kiss again—just to convince people that we’re really together—I’m in.”
He shook his head, still laughing softly. His eyes were very warm on her face. If she hadn’t already known that his heart belonged to someone else, she might have gotten the wrong idea from that expression. “Same here.”
She leaned against him again. His body was still shaking with amusement, and it felt incredibly good against hers. “Why are you still laughing about it?”
“I don’t even know,” he admitted. “Just that this is very weird.”
“I know. If it’s too weird, just tell me and we can call the whole thing off.”
“No way. I haven’t had anything to entertain me this much in ages. And no one has tried to set me up on a date in two weeks. As long as it’s okay with you, I want to keep going.”
“Me too.”
It occurred to her that she should probably convey some degree of emotional distance. Wouldn’t want him to think she was doing this just because she wanted to. So she added, “Although maybe you can introduce me to a couple of people in the next few weeks. I’m supposed to be adding some contacts for my business.”
“Oh. Yeah. Of course. I’ve already mentioned you to some of my mom’s friends. I’ll do better. I promise I’m not going to take advantage of you.”
Only Carter could be worried about taking advantage of her, when he’d been more of a gentleman with her than any man she’d ever met in her life. “I know you won’t,” she told him. “You’re way too good a guy for that.”
He gave her a strange look. One she didn’t understand. She was about to ask him about it, but a couple came over to the love seat just then. Ruth didn’t know them, but Carter did. They were old school friends of his.
Ruth responded to the introductions and the friendly conversation, conveying the right balance of friendliness toward the new acquaintances and besotted interest in Carter.
It wasn’t nearly as hard as she would have thought.
***
THE FOLLOWING FRIDAY, Ruth gave Carter a sidelong look as they rode up the elevator in a very swanky lakeside apartment building. Lincoln and his wife, Summer, had invited them over for dinner.
Ever since they’d received the dinner invitation on Wednesday, Ruth had been getting ready. She’d brainstormed all conceivable background information she and Carter would need at that point in their relationship. She’d called him up for the past two evenings to go over strategy. Last night, they’d talked for two hours, although in all honesty only the first half hour was actually preparing for tonight. The rest was getting to know him so they could be convincing to Carter’s brother and sister-in-law.
And now the time was here. Ruth was sure they were ready. They wouldn’t be caught off guard by an unexpected question or an awkward moment. Carter wanted to prove that he was over his long-lost love for Summer.
Whether Ruth believed those feelings were truly over (and she didn’t), she was going to make sure everyone else believed it after tonight. It was important to Carter. He hadn’t said so, but she could tell. If any moment was crucial in their wild fake-engagement plot, it was this one.
Right now.
Dinner with Lincoln and Summer.
“We’re gonna do great,” she murmured.
“Mm-hmm.” Carter slanted her a wry look.
“We are. You’ll see. You might not believe it, but I can be a great adoring girlfriend. They’ll be completely convinced I believe you walk on water.”
“All right. Don’t overdo it though. They’re both really smart. And observant. And they know me really well. If it’s too over the top, they won’t buy it.”
“It’s not going to be too over the top. It will be exactly right. And don’t forget you’ve got to act like you’re into me too. If they think it’s one sided, you’ll have accomplished nothing but embarrassing me. Or rather, nothing but letting me embarrass myself.” She checked her outfit—slim pants, leather boots, and a pine-green top with a discreetly sexy V-neckline. “Not that it hasn’t happened before.”
“Stop it,” Carter bit out, giving her an impatient look.
She couldn’t have been more surprised if a pet kitten gave her a painful scratch across the face. In the three weeks she’d known him, she’d never heard Carter be anything but gentle and polite. “Stop what?”
“Stop talking about yourself that way. Who cares if you messed up a little in past relationships? You think you’re the only one?”
“No, I don’t think I’m the only one.” The elevator had reached the top floor more than a minute ago, and they were still standing inside, Carter holding open the doors with one hand, despite the way they kept trying to shut. “I just meant—”
“I know what you meant.” He was holding her gaze with a strange intensity. It gave her weird flutters. Made her hands tremble slightly. “And it’s not going to happen. I know what I need to do, and I’d never let this crazy scheme embarrass you. I promise.”
She took a ragged breath. Then released it and smiled at him. “Okay. Thanks. Let’s do this then.”
She took his arm as they stepped off the elevator and was still holding it as they crossed the ornate foyer that led to the entrance of the condo. Carter knocked. After a moment, the door swung open, and Ruth and Carter were greeted by a sexy, grinning Lincoln Wilson—all vivid green eyes and lean, hard body in a black Henley and dark-washed jeans.
They were also greeted by the warm, savory scent of lasagna and baking bread and loud, haunting, dramatic music.
Ruth blinked in surprise at the blast of scent and sound and warm, knowing smile.
“Why the hell do you have the music so loud?” Carter demanded, sharing a friendly half hug with his brother. Mostly just pounding each other on the back.
“Hey Carter!” The voice was female and coming from the kitchen, although the woman speaking wasn’t in sight. “Please come on in, Ruth. I can’t wait to meet you. I’ll be out in just a minute.”
Ruth had practiced (several times) a friendly, casual opening to conversation at their arrival, but she couldn’t get it out at the moment. She stared around at the spacious, beautifully furnished room—set off by huge glass doors that led out onto a balcony that looked out over the lake. The music really was very loud. She recognized it now. Les Mis. Fantine was currently on her deathbed. Ruth wouldn’t have expected Lincoln Wilson to be a big fan, but the emotional music was swelling out of high-end speakers. Ruth could feel it all the way down to her bones.
“Hi, Ruth,” Lincoln said to her, loud enough to be heard over the music. He took her hand and held it in a gesture of playful, exaggerated gallantry. “It’s great to meet you. I’m hoping that for our first act of kinship, you’ll help me convince Carter to do a number.”
Ruth blinked. “A number?” She shifted her eyes over to Carter, who was now glaring at his brother.
“Oh no,” Carter muttered. “No way.”
His brother flashed a very Lincoln-like smile. “You arrived just in time for our favorite duet. I refreshed my memory on the words, so I’m all ready to go.”
“I said no. You planned this on purpose. You were watching the camera in the lobby and you timed it like this on purpose.” Carter was visibly outraged. “I can’t believe you.”
Lincoln laughed irrepressibly. “As if I would do such a thing to my little brother. It’s just a happy accident.” Turning to Ruth, he added, “You want to hear our old duet, don’t you? It was always his favorite. He made me sing it over and over again when we were kids.”
Thrilled by that unexpected piece of information on Carter, she clapped her hands excitedly. “Yes! Oh yes. You have to sing it, Carter!”
“Lincoln, I could punch you in the face right now,” Carter said gruffly.
“I know. But then we couldn’t serenade Ruth. It’s obvious she really wants to hear you. Fantine is just about dead here, so it’s almost time for us.”
“Damn it, Lincoln.” Carter looked momentarily helpless, his eyes moving from Ruth to his brother and back. “I don’t remember the words anymore.”
“Yes, you do.” Lincoln grabbed two remotes from near the television and handed one to Carter. “Here’s your microphone. Get ready. If you bail on me, you’re going to disappoint Ruth. And I know you don’t want to do that.”
Carter’s face twisted. He was obviously torn. Reluctant. For a moment Ruth didn’t know what he was going to decide. Then he groaned and gave his brother another glare as the music faded between songs. “You’re going to pay for this.”
Lincoln laughed again and flashed Ruth a victorious smile. “I knew he’d cave. He never could resist although he’ll never admit it to anyone anymore. He’s Javert. I’m Valjean. And here we go.”
“Don’t start without me!” Summer called as she ran out of the kitchen, still wiping her hands on a dishcloth.
Ruth knew Summer by sight. She was a quiet, pretty blonde and was currently dressed in an outfit that was basically a more expensive version of Ruth’s, with a pink top instead of a green one. She was flushed and smiling as she pulled Ruth down onto the couch so they could form the audience for the men, who were starting to sing “The Confrontation” with the recorded version coming through the speakers.
They were good. Carter had a better voice than his brother, but Lincoln hammed it up on purpose in a way that was impossible not to enjoy. They had the words and the timing and every note exactly right. Carter was obviously self-conscious about performing unexpectedly like that in front of Ruth. He kept giving her sheepish looks during his brother’s parts. But he belted out every word into his fake microphone, glaring at his brother with a malevolence which was exactly right for Javert’s part.
Ruth watched openmouthed, barely able to contain her delight at this new side of Carter and the pure fun of watching the brothers sing the dramatic duet. Summer was clearly just as thrilled. She was practically hugging herself as she watched. And both of them burst into loud applause and cheers as the song concluded.
Carter went immediately to turn off the music, as if worried he’d be pressured into a second performance. Lincoln laughed and clapped his hands and then sank down onto the couch, wrapping an arm around his wife. “That was fun.”
“That was ridiculous,” Carter said, taking the chair beside Ruth’s side of the couch. “I can’t believe you did that to me.” He cleared his throat and added to Ruth, “Sorry about that. I should have known my brother wouldn’t act like a normal host.”
“No, it was great,” Ruth insisted.
“I figured it might loosen him up a little,” Lincoln said, still grinning as he added to Ruth in a conspiratorial whisper, “He’s sometimes kind of uptight. Worries too much about doing the right thing and doesn’t let himself have fun.”
“I am not uptight.” Carter scowled although it was clear he wasn’t genuinely annoyed.
Lincoln mouthed to Ruth, “Uptight” again and made a gesture of buttoning an imaginary collar.
Carter grabbed a cushion and threw it at his brother. It hit Lincoln’s head with a satisfying swoosh. “And I have plenty of fun. I just don’t always need to be the center of attention, like some people I might mention.”
“You’ve got a really great voice, Carter,” Summer said, her gentle voice stilling some of Lincoln’s laughter. “I remember you used to do choir in school, and you’d always do those community musicals in the summer. You’d usually get the lead roles. Why don’t you sing anymore?”
Carter was wearing a blue button-up shirt and tailored trousers. He looked handsome and put-together and affluent and as relaxed as she’d ever seen him. He shrugged. “I don’t know. Just don’t have the opportunity. I work twelve hours a day. When would I have the time?”
“I guess you can always sing in the shower,” Lincoln said. “Does he?”
When she realized the question was aimed at her, Ruth straightened up. “What?”
“Does he sing in the shower?”
Summer gave him a little jab with her elbow. “Lincoln, stop.”
“Yes, please stop,” Carter said with an eye roll.
“Anyway, I’ll never tell what he does in the shower,” Ruth said, playing up the primness in a way that felt appropriate for her role as the new love of Carter’s life.
It worked. They all laughed. And since dinner was ready, they moved to the table to eat.
Dinner was delicious, and the wine was excellent. Summer was both sweet and smart, and Lincoln was clever and hilarious. Even Carter came alive in a way she hadn’t seen from him before, telling stories and arguing with his brother and making sure Ruth got plenty of attention. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d laughed so much. Half the time, she forgot to act like she was completely in love with him.
It didn’t seem to matter. The whole evening felt natural, and Summer and Lincoln didn’t appear to question the nature of Ruth’s relationship with Carter.
After dessert, Ruth begged Carter to do one more song with his brother, so the men went to the other room to confer about possibilities while Ruth helped Summer rinse off the dishes and load the dishwasher.
“This was really fun. Thanks so much for having me,” Ruth said. She really liked the other woman although Summer wasn’t anything like her. In fact, they were as different as they could get.
Any man who’d been in love with Summer wasn’t going to fall in love with Ruth. That much was clear to Ruth. She’d already known it. She’d come to that conclusion after a ten-minute conversation with Carter. So she wasn’t sure why she felt a little heavy about it now.
“You’re welcome. It’s really good to get to know you. I’m sure I must have seen you around some. Lincoln says you come into Milhouse a lot, so he knew who you were. But I’m sorry we hadn’t met before now.”
“There’s no reason we would have met. We don’t move in the same circles, and I didn’t move to Green Valley until you were out of high school. But it’s been really nice to get to know you too. I know Carter loves you like family.”
Ruth knew more than that, but it hardly seemed appropriate for a new girlfriend to mention that she was aware her boyfriend used to be in love with another woman (and probably still was).
“We are like family. We grew up together. Carter was always my best friend.” Summer sighed as she leaned against the counter, her brown eyes slightly poignant. “Things have changed in the past year. For obvious reasons. I mean, I married Lincoln. Fell in love with him.”
Ruth didn’t miss the unexpected order. Surely falling in love should have happened before marriage. But she didn’t have time to mull it over because Summer was still talking.
“It was kind of hard. For all of us. It changed the balance of our relationships. I couldn’t be as close to Carter as I used to be.”
“Yeah. That makes sense. I guess it was unavoidable.”
“So I don’t get to spend as much time with him as I used to. He’s been stressed and busy since his father died, taking over the company and trying to turn it around. He’s been working so hard. I was worried he wasn’t happy.” Summer swallowed and gave Ruth a little smile. “But he seems happy tonight. I’m so glad he’s met you.”
“Y-yeah. Me too.” For just a moment, Ruth felt a little guilty. This was a tenderhearted woman who obviously loved Carter dearly. It felt wrong to lie to her like that. Give her hope of Carter moving on when that wasn’t really what he was doing. But it was what Carter wanted, and Ruth was on his side. She was going to do what he asked.
Summer slanted her a quick look. “He’s always tried to be good at everything. Do everything other people need of him. He’s done that in relationships too. Even with me. Even when...” She didn’t finish that thought although Ruth really wanted to know what it was. “He’s always gone down the road that’s been laid out for him even if it wasn’t the one he wanted. I always hoped he’d finally go his own way. Find someone he could really let go with. I think he needs that, and he never really did with me.”
Ruth had no idea what to say to that. It felt like Summer was telling her something, but she wasn’t sure if it was good or not. So all she said was, “Yeah. Yeah.”
Then Lincoln called out for them, summoning them to the living room so he and Carter could perform “Mr. Mistoffelees” for them. Carter sang Rum Tum Tugger’s part. Lincoln was Mistoffelees and did a lot of comical dance moves that made Ruth laugh until she almost peed in her pants.
They were all still laughing as they said goodbye, and Ruth couldn’t stop smiling as she rode down in the elevator with Carter.
“It wasn’t that funny,” he said after a minute.
“It was brilliant. You guys were really good.”
“Uh-huh.”
“You were! I never would have believed it. How long have you been singing?”
“It feels like all my life.” He wasn’t meeting her eyes.
“Summer said you did musical theater?”
“Yeah. I did a lot of it.”
“Why did you stop?”
“I grew up.”
She frowned, since he still wasn’t looking at her as they exited the elevator and headed outside, and it felt like he was hiding. “Carter.”
Her tone drew his gaze to hers. Something softened on his face as he stopped just outside the main entrance of a building. “My dad got me to stop in high school.”
“What? Why?”
“He didn’t think it was... I don’t know.” Carter shrugged and glanced down. “It wasn’t manly enough or something. His reasons were all wrong. I knew it even then. But I caved. I was always trying to get that man to love me.”
Her heart ached at the faint hint of pain she heard hidden beneath the dry resignation of his tone. She put a hand on his chest and didn’t say anything.
After a moment, he cleared his throat and gave her a sardonic half smile. “So I gave it up and focused on sports instead. I was pretty good at sports too, but I never really enjoyed them. I didn’t give up my friends in theater though. I wasn’t that kind of person.” He added the last bit hurriedly, as if he were worried she’d think badly of him.
“I know that. Even if I hadn’t gotten to know you, I still would have known that. People in Green Valley don’t just love you because you’re rich and good-looking. They love you because you’re good.”
He darted her a quick, questioning look and mumbled something that sounded embarrassed.
She laughed and asked, “And you never wanted to get back into it? After high school, I mean.”
“No. To tell you the truth, it never even occurred to me. It’s not like I was ever good enough for a career. I just had fun with it.”
“Nothing’s wrong with just having fun. Even now that you’re an adult. Aren’t there community theaters and opportunities like that?”
“I honestly don’t have time, even if I...” He shook his head and started walking toward the car.
She fell in step with him. “Well, maybe you will someday. You shouldn’t have to work all the time. You should do some things just for fun. Just because you enjoy it.”
“Yeah. Well. It was kind of fun tonight. But I don’t expect it to become a habit.” He was flushed and relaxed and a little rumpled. So sexy that Ruth gulped and glanced away.
“I had a really good time. Summer and Lincoln are both really great.”
“Yeah. They are.”
She checked Carter’s face. He looked slightly subdued but not hurt or particularly sad. She took his arm as they neared his car. “Summer thinks you need to let go.”
“What?” The muscles of his arm tensed beneath her hand. “Let go of what?”
“Oh, not like that. She didn’t mean let go of someone. She said she’s always wanted you to go down your own road. Not the road laid out for you. She wants you to find someone that you’ll let yourself go with. That’s what she said.”
“What did she mean by that?”
“I don’t know exactly. But I...” She hesitated before she finished the thought but then just went for it. “I can see why you wanted to do this. Fake the relationship.”
His eyes were sober as he turned toward her. They were standing beside the car now. He’d unlocked it but not opened the door. “You do? You understand?”
“I think so. It was really clear how much Lincoln and Summer both love you. They love you so, so much. But it’s also like... like they...”
“Feel sorry for me,” Carter murmured. Very softly. He’d turned his eyes away from her.
“No. Not exactly that. Maybe a little, but it’s more like they feel... guilty.” She swallowed. “Would they have reason to feel that way?” She held her breath, having no idea if he’d answer her intrusive question.
He didn’t immediately. It was almost a full minute before he said hoarsely, “Yes. I mean, they think they have reason. Lincoln felt like he was taking her away from me. In fact, he wasn’t going to... he was going to give her up for me. He loves her more than anything, and he was going to give her up for me.” His voice was soft, but it ached. Filled the cool air around them.
Ruth reached over to put a hand on his arm, needing to comfort him somehow. “I’m sure you wouldn’t have let him do that. Not when they’re so in love.”
Carter cut his head to the side quickly. “I... I almost did. I told you before. Everything that happened is my fault. I made all the mistakes. So I do think they might feel a little guilty still, but they shouldn’t. I can’t let them. They didn’t do anything wrong. I need them to believe...” He took a weird breath.
“So we’ll do it. We’ll make sure they know they have nothing to feel guilty about. No reason to feel bad for you. But it’s really going to have to be good. If we’re just together for a while and then we break up, it might confirm to them that you’re not over her. You tried but you’re not over her.”
“So what can I do? What do I need to do?”
It was so strange that he was looking at her with that kind of trust in his eyes. She couldn’t remember anyone trusting her like that. Except maybe Kayla. “I don’t know exactly. But if you really want them to believe you’ve fallen in love, we need to do what Summer said. Show that you’re really letting go. Figure out something that... that makes them think you’re unbuttoning a little.”
“Unbuttoning?” He frowned and adjusted the collar of his shirt.
“Just a little. You have to admit you’re pretty well buttoned-up.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Nothing.” She smiled up at him, reminding herself that this was a plot and that his warm brown eyes didn’t mean what she might want them to mean. “I like you as you are. I’m just saying. If this whirlwind romance is going to be convincing, you probably want to make it seem like you’re being all of yourself. You’re not holding back. And that you’re remembering how to have fun.”
He was quiet for a minute as he opened the passenger door for her and walked around to the driver’s side. Then he met her eyes and said softly, “I am having fun.”
Her heart did a silly little bounce. “Me too.”