Suddenly the boy let out a gigantic BELCH which rolled around the Assembly Hall like thunder. Many of the audience began to GIGGLE. “Silence!” shouted the Trunchbull.
What’s that fly doing in my gravy?
Looks like breaststroke!
What tables don’t you have to learn?
Dinner tables!
What kind of nuts always seem to have a cold?
Cashews!
What is a pretzel’s favorite dance?
The twist!
CUSTOMER: Waiter, this food tastes funny.
WAITER: Then why aren’t you laughing?
What are twins’ favorite fruit?
Pears!
Suddenly the boy let out a gigantic BELCH which rolled around the Assembly Hall like thunder. Many of the audience began to GIGGLE. “Silence!” shouted the Trunchbull.
What do computer operators eat for lunch?
Chips!
What would happen if pigs could fly?
The price of bacon would go up.
Waiter, will my pizza be long?
No, sir, it will be round!
What happens if you make a walnut laugh?
It cracks up!
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn’t peeling well!
What do you call a peanut in a spacesuit?
An astro-nut!
What is green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!
What cheese is made backward?
Edam.
What did the nacho say to the burrito?
Can we taco ’bout it?
Why did the baker stop making doughnuts?
She was bored of the hole business!
What type of cheese doesn’t belong to you?
Nacho cheese!
Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Justin.
Justin who?
Justin time for lunch!
CUSTOMER: Is there spaghetti on the menu today?
WAITER: No, I cleaned it off!
What did the Italian chef give his waiters?
A pizza his mind!
What do polar bears have for dinner?
Iceberg-ers!
Why couldn’t the teddy bear eat his lunch?
Because he was stuffed!
Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
What did the daddy tomato say to the baby tomato?
Hurry and ketchup!
What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm in your apple!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
How do eggs leave in an emergency?
Through the fire eggs-it!
What do aliens eat off in space?
Flying saucers!
What vegetable should never be served on a boat?
Leeks!
