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I ENTERED MY COTTAGE and was assaulted by the smell of our evening meal. I hadn’t eaten much, since eating always made me slow. Instead, I liked to keep my energy levels up by eating fruits and berries throughout the day and then eat as much as I could once I returned home. My stomach grumbled in rebellion at the familiar aroma.
“So how was your play date?” Mother asked.
“We weren’t playing. We were practicing,” I said, aggravated by her tone.
“Oh Alora, I wish you would stop that.”
“I wish you would stop wishing I would stop.” I passed the dining table and went into my room. I gently leaned my practice sword against the wall by my bed and went back out to deal with her. I sat down at the table.
“It’s just that...”
“I know Mother.”
She placed a bowl of stew in front of me. There was beef, broth and a mixture of carrots and potatoes. “It’s just that I miss your father. And seeing you fight with the other boys always reminds me of how he used to play with you and teach you how to fight.”
“I’m good at it Mother,” I said before nearly attacking the bowl.
“I know.”
“Better than all the boys.”
“I know that too. I hear the other ladies talking about you and how you should be fighting for a husband, not with swords.”
“A husband? I don’t want to be at home cooking and cleaning—playing house.” Mother turned and peered. “Sorry, Mother. It’s just not for me. I want more.”
“I know.”
“Mother, there’s news from the king.”
“From the king?”
I could tell she didn’t expect those words to come out of my mouth. “Aye. The king is asking for volunteers for his army. He has called for male and female volunteers. I would like to—”
“Nay.”
“Nay?”
“I forbid you to join the king’s army.”
“But Mother—”
“That’s the end of it. No daughter of mine is going to be a knight.”
“But Mother—”
“Enough! Go to your room until your father comes home.” She removed my empty bowl and handed me a piece of bread to take with me to my room, or rather my dungeon.
I rose, slid my chair under the table and then stormed off slamming my door behind me. I threw myself onto my bed and stared at the ceiling until I heard the front door open and shut.
“Alora. The horse please.”
Ugh. Do the chores ever stop? I got up and went to greet my step father. After he returned home from trying to sell the blueberries and potatoes that we grew, it was my job to take the horse into the stable.
“There you are. Mata is waiting for you outside. Treat her good, she worked hard today.”
“Aye, Biron.”
“Alora!” My mother yelled.
“Aye, Father.”
I took Mata into the stable and uncinched her saddle and removed her saddle pad. I stroked her softly between her eyes to make her relax and when she lowered her head, I removed her bridle and hung it up. I filled her trough with water and placed some oats and chopped carrots into her pail.
Her grooming brush was at the other end of the two horse stable where I left it yesterday. I retrieved it and went to work. She was a good horse and never really caused much trouble. In fact, I think she enjoyed our time together at the end of the day. Even though it was a chore, I had to admit, I enjoyed taking care of her. I imagined when I fed her and she snorted, it was her way of saying thank you.
After finishing taking care of Mata I went back into the cottage and Mother had already told Biron.
“Alora. Your mother tells me you heard about the king’s call.”
“Don’t rile her up, Biron. Please...” Mother pleaded.
“What could it hurt if she auditioned? Maybe she’s not as good as she thinks she is,” he suggested.
That last one was probably more for me than for her. “But what if I am?”
“Then I guess we shall call you Lady Alora from now on.” He slapped his knee, laughing up a storm.
“Stop encouraging her Biron. I already told her she wasn’t going.”
I wondered why she was acting this way. I have so much fun when I’m fighting the boys. I didn’t care what she said. I had already made up my mind.
“Why don’t you become a sweet young lady? Any man would be happy to have you as a bride,” Biron added.
“I don’t want to be a bride. I don’t want to clean up after him and take care of him. I can do more than that.”
And then I saw it. My mother looked down. “I’m sorry Mother.” I had hurt her feelings. She had married my father and had done those things for him and she also did them for Biron.
“Mother? Didn’t you ever wish for something more when you were my age?”
“Well, I did imagine myself married to the king. Having all those servants taking care of me. I thought that must be nice.”
“And what stopped you?” I asked.
“Don’t be foolish. I couldn’t possibly have married the king.”
Could it be? As I stood there arguing with my mother, or rather pleading, did she think the king wouldn’t want her? He himself was of humble origins. And my mother with her sandy, long, flowing hair, beautiful blue eyes, and shapely body was just as pretty, if not more so, than the queen.
“Mother, what if you could go back? What if you could change your stars and get the king’s attention, would you?”
“I suppose, but that’s silly.”
“I can do something now. Do you want to be on this farm forever, Mother? I don’t. I want more. Please give me your blessing. Please Mother.”
“My young daughter. Has life been so terrible for you here with me?”
“Nay, but an opportunity has presented itself for more. Much more.”
“My dear daughter. You have much to learn.”
“That’s enough talk for today. Why not sleep on it and decide in the morning?” Biron said.
“I can’t. If I’m going to go, then I must leave in the morning.”
“Let your mother and me sleep on it. We’ll have an answer for you when you awake.”
I could tell I wasn’t winning this argument. “Ugh... fine.”
“Alora!” Mother scolded.
“I’m sorry. Aye, Father.”
I hated calling him father. After all, he wasn’t my real father. After Father died in battle, mother married Biron. That’s when she commanded that I address him as Father. He does take care of you like a father, she had said. I went to my room and thought about my real father. Father was a knight and brave by default. He would let me go. He would understand what this means to me.
From my room I heard Mother arguing with Biron. “Nay Biron. I won’t let her go.” I sat down by my door and put my ear to it. They were talking loud enough for me to hear them clearly.
“She’s getting older. She’s no longer a baby. If it’s what she wants, then she should go,” Biron said.
“She doesn’t understand the real world. She doesn’t know what it’s like. She’s still too trusting.”
“You can’t shelter her much longer. She needs to get out there and learn.”
“I don’t know.”
“She doesn’t want this life. If she has the opportunity to do something she’s really interested in, then we shouldn’t stand in her way.”
“But what if she gets injured, or worse?”
“Then we’ll deal with that when the time comes.”
“I’m going to go talk to her some more,” Mother said. When I heard her footsteps getting closer, I scrambled to my feet and leapt onto my bed. I crossed my legs and sat waiting. Mother knocked.
“Alora dear, may I come in?”
“Aye, Mother.”
The door creaked open and a rush of wind followed her in, blowing out my candle. She shut the door, struck a match and brought the flame back to life. She sat on my bed next to me and inhaled slow and deep. Exhaling a sigh, she began speaking. “I know you think you want this, but how can you be sure?”
“I’ve never been more sure of anything.”
“But finding a husband and starting a family is what ladies do.”
I wrapped my finger around my big toe. “Mother, I’m not a lady. Boys don’t even like me,” I said.
“They do dear, but no one likes to be made a fool of.”
I thought about that. “I suppose. And what about other girls? They don’t like me either.”
“Perhaps because they don’t know how to talk to you. A girl that prefers sword play versus stitching isn’t going to be easy to talk to. Besides, what about Lucah?” Mother asked.
“We’re friends.”
“I see the way that boy looks at you. You might think you’re friends, but I can tell he wants to be more.”
I realized I was playing with my feet. “What? How?”
“A woman knows. Don’t worry. You’ll figure it all out one day. Just open your eyes, dear, and pay attention to what people do, not what they say.”
“May I answer the king’s call?” I asked.
She sighed. “Just give me this evening. I will wake before the sun rises and give you my answer.”
“But Mother—”
“Before the sun rises.”
I nodded.
She leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead. Before she stood, she patted my dirty feet. “Looks like you’ve been out and about barefoot again. Wash your feet before you go to bed. They’ll dirty the sheets.”
When she shut the door, I slid out of my brown pants and green shirt and walked over to the pail of water resting in the corner. I used a wash cloth to clean myself and made sure to scrub my feet thoroughly. Throwing on my plain, white sleep shirt, I climbed into bed and stared at the ceiling again. I hoped she would give me her permission, but I couldn’t risk missing the carriage. I weighed the options and made up my mind.
There was no way I was going to miss this opportunity. I planted my feet on the floor and looked at my toes. Mother would be proud at how clean they were. I shimmied out of my sleep shirt and put on the clothes I was wearing earlier. I grabbed my shoes and walked to my window. Picking up my practice sword, I climbed out and landed quietly.
After sliding the window closed, I crouched low and tip toed past the house and towards the woods that led to Lucah’s home. I stopped, leaned on a tree and put my shoes on. The woods were no place for bare feet.
I made my way through the woods to Lucah’s house, a journey I’ve taken many times before, and could see light filtering through the cracks of the window coverings. I knew his parents would have something to say, but they knew me and knew I could take care of myself. I walked up and knocked.
“Hello Alora. Out at this hour again?”
“Aye. Is Lucah available?” I asked.
“We were just finishing our evening meal.”
Lucah’s father moved out of the way and motioned for me to enter. “Lucah... Alora is here,” he announced.
Lucah came out of the kitchen area. “Alora. What are you doing here?” he asked, surprised to see me.
“I need to talk to you about tomorrow. Can I come along with you?”
“Did your mother give you permission? I can’t believe it.”
“Nay. She hasn’t made up her mind yet, but I’m not waiting for her decision.”
“You shouldn’t disobey your mother,” Lucah’s mother added as she came out from the kitchen area, drying her hands on her apron.
“Sorry, but I must audition. I must.”
“I understand dear. But if your mother comes looking for you, I will tell her where you’ve gone. As a mother, I must.”
“I understand.”
“But of course I won’t go looking for her. Only if she comes looking for me,” she added.
I wished Mother and Biron were as understanding as Lucah’s parents.
“Good luck with the audition Alora. Show them what we Kingsley girls are made of,” she said, and then went back to cleaning up.
I asked Lucah to meet me before the sun rose, where the town road meets the main road. From there we can hike to the bridge where the carriage will be waiting for us.
“I have to get home before they realize I’m gone. See you in the morning.” I waved goodbye, but Lucah just stood there shaking his head as I walked out of his home.
I made the journey through the woods and back to my window. Prying it open from a corner, I climbed in. I undressed again and threw on my sleep shirt. Looking at the dirty chore clothes I had removed, I wondered what I would wear. I had other pants that were used for chores. Those looked too dirty and ragged. I didn’t want to look that way in front of the king. I opened my small closet and pulled out a blue dress I’d never worn. Biron had given it to me as a gift and I refused to wear it. I laid it down and retrieved my stitching kit from underneath my bed.
Using scissors, I cut the bottom of the dress in two. I stitched it closed, making two separate legs and tried it on. It wasn’t perfect, but it would do. At the very least it was clean. I tried moving around in it—a few kicks here, a few lunges there.
I performed overhead strikes, side strikes and jump strikes. I stretched my body in every direction and it moved with me easily, not bunching or catching during any of my movements. I removed my new outfit, folded it, and placed it gently under my pillow.
Standing in the candlelight, I focused on my pillow as if the outfit hiding beneath it was the key to a new life.
There was a knock at my door. “Alora, may I come in?”
“Just a moment. I’m just getting ready for bed.”
“Bed? It’s still early,” Biron said from the other side of the door.
“Just give me a moment.” I rushed to get into my sleep shirt and then jumped onto my bed, crossing my legs and resting my elbows on my knees. “Come in.”
Biron entered, shut the door behind him and sat at my side. “You understand why your mother doesn’t want you to go?”
I nodded.
“I think you should go, but your mother doesn’t want you to. Please don’t make this any harder on her than it needs to be.”
I was playing with my feet again.
“Whatever the decision, will you be able to accept it?” he asked.
I didn’t want to lie, but I couldn’t tell him the truth. Instead, I answered with silence.
Biron stood and made his way towards the door. He pulled it open and turned one last time. “Your mother loves you Alora. And even though I’m not your real father, so do I.” He nodded once and then closed the door behind him.
With him gone, I threw myself backwards and stretched out my legs. I wondered what my punishment was going to be when I returned home. Whatever it was, I was sure I could deal with it. I stared into the darkness thinking about what tomorrow would bring.
I’ve never been as far as the king’s castle. What would it be like? Would I be good enough? Would I be better than the other volunteers? Suddenly, I found myself concerned. What if I wasn’t good enough? What if everyone else was better than me? There was only one way to find out. I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep. I needed my rest. Tomorrow was a big day.