part0015

The bus ride home was even more awkward. Ty and I sat next to each other, but I did my best to remain as far from him as possible. When we stepped off the bus, he turned to look at me.

“Do you want me to walk you to your dorm?”

“Why?” I stared at him.

“Uh, no reason I guess. See you tomorrow?”

“Right. Remember we have that trip tomorrow.” I winced as I recalled the way he’d spoken about Mrs. Ruby. Why did it have to be him that I had a crush on?

“Sure, I’ll be there.” He nodded to me, then turned and walked off in the other direction, away from the school.

I started to warn him that he shouldn’t be wandering off of school grounds but thought better of it. He was old enough to know better. He could take his own chances. If he wanted to get into more trouble, that was his business. Still, I wondered where he was going and why.

In an attempt to distract myself from those questions I hurried through the courtyard and toward the dormitories. I could pick up a good book, turn on some loud music, and completely forget about Ty. All I had to do was try.

I stepped into my dorm room and found it empty. At least I would have a few minutes of peace to sort through my thoughts.

I’d just put on my headphones and picked up my book when there was a loud knock followed by Maby’s laughter.

“Come on in. The door’s unlocked.”

Maby stumbled in with several packages in her arms.

“Let me help you!” I jumped up just in time to save one of the packages. “What’s all this?”

“From Mom.” She grinned as she stacked them up on the kitchen counter. “She took a trip to France. I’m sure she bought something in every store she stopped in.”

“Wow!” I smiled. “That’s wonderful.”

“I guess.” Maby looked over the packages. “Sometimes I wonder if it’s a bit much.”

“What’s a bit much?” Candy walked into the room.

“My mom.” Maby pointed to the packages.

“She loves you.” I thought of my own mother. She often showered me with gifts. Although I didn’t need half the things she bought me, it was our ritual and it made us both happy. “I’m sure she would have rather been shopping with you.”

“Ah, me too.” Maby shook her head. “Anyway, I have to run to a meeting, can I leave these here for now?”

“Sure, no problem.”

After Maby left, Candy looked straight into my eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“What do you mean?”

“Apple! I can see it in your eyes. You’re stressed. What is going on?”

“Nothing, nothing at all. You should open your packages. I’m going to take my book into my room.” I snatched it up from the sofa and headed straight for my room.

“Apple!” She followed after me and pushed open my door before I could get it closed. “What’s going on here?”

“It’s not a big deal. I just want some time alone, alright?” I sat down on my bed and did my best to appear calm, but my heart continued to slam against my chest. What if I told her the truth? Would she laugh at me?

“That’s enough.” She pushed the door to my room closed and strode across the carpet toward me. “You’re going to tell me exactly what’s going on now.”

“Ugh.” I flopped back on my bed and closed my eyes. “I’m not sure that I can. I don’t even know how to explain it to myself.”

“Don’t try to make sense out of it, just tell me what’s going on with you.” She sat down on the end of my bed. “You know we always talk everything out. Don’t let this pin you down. Once you talk about it, everything will be more clear.”

“Maybe that’s what I’m afraid of the most.” I sat up again and looked into her eyes. “I’ve gotten myself into a real mess, Candy—one that I never expected.”

“Hey, things happen.” She patted the back of my hand. “Whatever it is, I’m sure we can figure it out. But you have to tell me first.”

“It’s Ty.” I forced his name from between my lips. Even just saying it was enough to send my heart racing. Why? I frowned. “I hate to admit it, but it’s Ty.”

“What do you mean it’s Ty?” She narrowed her eyes. “Has he done something to hurt you? If so, I will sic Mick, Chuckles, and Wes on him. Just tell me what he did to you.”

“He didn’t do anything to me. I mean, not exactly.” I frowned. “He didn’t hurt me or do anything wrong. It’s just I...” I took a breath. “I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Oh my goodness!” Candy jumped up from the bed and gasped. “Does my little Apple have her first crush?”

“It’s not my first one, I’ve had crushes before.” I clapped my hand over my mouth and winced.

“You do!” Candy squealed, then jumped up and down with excitement. “I can’t wait to tell Maby!”

“No!” I jumped off the end of the bed and landed right in front of Candy. “You can’t tell her, not ever. Promise me!” I stared hard into her eyes.

“What? Why not?” Candy frowned. “She’d be so hurt if you didn’t tell her.”

“Candy, if Maby finds out, Mick will find out eventually and you know it. Then Mick will tell Ty and I will be even more humiliated than I already am! Please!” I grabbed her hand and looked into her eyes. “You can’t tell anyone, please! Promise me?”

“Alright, I promise.” She sighed. “But I think you’re being ridiculous. Maby would keep it a secret.”

“I’m sure she would, but Mick has ways of finding out everything.” I felt some relief as I sat back down on the bed. “Besides, just you knowing is embarrassing enough for me. I want to be able to pretend that none of this ever happened. Unfortunately, I haven’t figured out how to do that yet. That’s why I need your help.”

“I will help.” She sat down beside me. “But first we need to figure out what kind of help you need.”

“What do you mean? I just told you the kind of help I need. I need to get rid of this crush so I can go back to normal. I need to stop thinking about Ty every time I close my eyes.”

“I’m not sure if that’s the kind of help you need.” She folded her legs and turned to look at me. “If you have these feelings for him, maybe the help you need is learning how to express them.”

“No!” I shook my head. “Absolutely not. I don’t have feelings for him. All I have is an annoying crush. I’m sure that it has something to do with everyone pairing up around here. I honestly hadn’t even thought about Ty before. There’s nothing real between us. I just happen to be feeling a little lonely, I guess.”

“Or maybe getting to know Ty made you realize that he’s a pretty interesting guy. Have you considered that?”

“Not exactly. But it wouldn’t matter anyway. Even if he is interesting—even if there is more to him than I first thought—he has zero interest in me. So, what does it matter?”

“How can he have any interest in you if you never speak?” She snapped her fingers. “I’ve got it. I’m going to teach you a few things. Easy conversation starters. That way when you two see each other on the trip tomorrow, you can actually talk.”

“I don’t know.” I frowned. “I guess it couldn’t hurt to try.”

“The easiest way to start a conversation is to ask about music. Everyone loves music. So, you ask about what kind of music he likes or maybe if he’s listened to anything new lately. Then you share what kind of music you like.” She brushed her palms against each other. “Easy as pie.”

“Okay, I think I could do that.” I nodded.

“Next, you can ask him about something you know he’s interested in, like football or skateboards.”

“But I don’t know anything about either of those things.” I sighed.

“You don’t have to know, trust me. If he’s into it, he’ll explain everything to you. It’s a good way to spark a conversation if you get stuck.”

“Thanks, Candy. I just really hope we can find a way to be friends. You should see him with the kids at art club. I’ve never seen anyone so natural with them.”

“Oh?” Candy smiled. She leaned closer to me and looked into my eyes. “I think the first thing you should do is figure out if you really want to be just friends .”

“Of course. That’s the only option.” I shrugged.

“All I’m saying is that you should think about it.” She gave me a warm hug. “I promise not to pressure you. But maybe you two would be really good together.”