ACT V.

Enter HEGIO, PHILOPOLEMUS, PHILOCRATES, and behind them, STALAGMUS.

HEGIO
To Jove and to the Deities I return with reason hearty thanks, inasmuch as they have restored you to your father, and inasmuch as they have delivered me from very many afflictions, which, while I was obliged to be here without you, I was enduring, and inasmuch as I see that that fellow pointing to STALAGMUS is in my power, and inasmuch as his word pointing to PHILOCIATES has been found true to me.

PHILOPOLEMUS
Enough now have I grieved from my very soul, and enough with care and tears have I disquieted myself. Enough now have I heard of your woes, which at the harbour you told me of. Let us now to this business.

PHILOCRATES
What now, since I’ve kept my word with you, and have caused him to be restored back again to freedom?

HEGIO
Philocrates, you have acted so that I can never return you thanks enough, in the degree that you merit from myself and my son.

PHILOPOLEMUS
Nay, but you can, father, and you will be able, and I shall be able; and the Divinities will give the means for you to return the kindness he merits to one who deserves so highly of us; as, my father, you are able to do to this person who so especially deserves it.

HEGIO
What need is there of words? I have no tongue with which to deny whatever you may ask of me.

PHILOCRATES
I ask of you to restore to me that servant whom I left here as a surety for myself; who has always proved more faithful to me than to himself; in order that for his services I may be enabled to give him a reward.

HEGIO
Because you have acted thus kindly, the favour shall be returned, the thing that you ask; both that and anything else that you shall ask of me, you shall obtain. And I would not have you blame me, because in my anger I have treated him harshly.

PHILOCRATES
What have you done?

HEGIO
I confined him in fetters at the stone-quarries, when I found out that I had been imposed upon.

PHILOCRATES
Ah wretched me! That for my safety misfortunes should have happened to that best of men.

HEGIO
Now, on this account, you need not give me even one groat of silver for him. Receive him of me without cost that he may be free.

PHILOCRATES
On my word, Hegio, you act with kindness; but I entreat that you will order this man to be sent for.

HEGIO
Certainly. To the attendants, who immediately obey. Where are you? Go this instant, and bring Tyndarus here. To PHILOPOLEMUS and PHILOCRATES. Do you go in-doors; in the meantime, I wish to enquire of this statue for whipping, what was done with my younger son. Do you go bathe in the meantime.

PHILOPOLEMUS
Philocrates, follow me this way in-doors.

PHILOCRATES
I follow you. They go into the house.

HEGIO and STALAGMUS.

HEGIO
Come you, step this way, you worthy fellow, my fine slave.

STALAGMUS
What is fitting for me to do, when you, such a man as you are, are speaking false? I was never a handsome, or a fine, or a good person, or an honest one, nor shall I ever be; assuredly, don’t you be forming any hopes that I shall be honest.

HEGIO
You easily understand pretty well in what situation your fortunes are. If you shall prove truth-telling, you’ll make your lot from bad somewhat better. Speak out, then, correctly and truthfully; but never yet truthfully or correctly have you acted.

STALAGMUS
Do you think that I’m ashamed to own it, when you affirm it?

HEGIO
But I’ll make you to be ashamed; for I’ll cause you to be blushes all over.

STALAGMUS
Heyday-you’re threatening stripes, I suppose, to me, guite unaccustomed to them! Away with them, I beg. Tell me what you bring, that you may carry off hence what you are in want of.

HEGIO
Very fluent indeed. But now I wish this prating to be cut short.

HEGIO
As you desire, so be it done.

HEGIO
to the AUDIENCE . As a boy he was very obedient; now that suits him not. Let’s to this business; now give your attention, and inform me upon what I ask. If you tell the truth, you’ll make your fortunes somewhat better.

STALAGMUS
That’s mere trifling. Don’t you think that I know what I’m deserving of?

HEGIO
Still, it is in your power to escape a small portion of it, if not the whole.

STALAGMUS
A small portion I shall escape, I know; but much will befall me, and with my deserving it, because I both ran away, and stole your son and sold him.

HEGIO
To what person?

STALAGMUS
To Theodoromedes the Polyplusian, in Elis, for six minæ.

HEGIO
O ye immortal Gods! He surely is the father of this person, Philocrates.

STALAGMUS
Why, I know him better than yourself, and have seen him more times.

HEGIO
Supreme Jove, preserve both myself and my son for me. He goes to the door, and calls aloud. Philocrates, by your good Genius, I do entreat you, come out, I want you.

Enter PHILOCRATES, from the house

PHILOCRATES
Hegio, here am I; if you want anything of me, command me.

HEGIO
He pointing to STALAGMUS declares that he sold my son to your father, in Elis, for six minæ.

PHILOCRATES
to STALAGMUS . How long since did that happen?

STALAGMUS
This is the twentieth year, commencing from it.

PHILOCRATES
He is speaking falsely.

STALAGMUS
Either I or you do. Why, your father gave you the little child, of four years old, to be your own slave.

PHILOCRATES
What was his name? If you are speaking the truth, tell me that, then.

STALAGMUS
Pægnium, he used to be called; afterwards, you gave him the name of Tyndarus.

PHILOCRATES
Why don’t I recollect you?

STALAGMUS
Because it’s the fashion for persons to forget, and not to know him whose favour is esteemed as worth nothing.

PHILOCRATES
Tell me, was he the person whom you sold to my father, who was given me for my private service?

STALAGMUS
It was his son pointing to HEGIO .

HEGIO
Is this person now living?

STALAGMUS
I received the money I cared nothing about the rest.

HEGIO
to PHILOCRATES . What do you say?

PHILOCRATES
Why, this very Tyndarus is your son, according, indeed, to the proofs that he mentions. For, a boy himself together with me from boyhood was he brought up, virtuously and modestly, even to manhood.

HEGIO
I am both unhappy and happy, if you are telling the truth. Unhappy for this reason, because, if he is my son, I have badly treated him. Alas! why have I done both more and less than was his due. That I have ill treated him I am grieved; would that it only could be undone. But see, he’s coming here, in a guise not according to his deserts.

Enter TYNDARUS, in chains, led in by the SERVANTS.

TYNDARUS
to himself . I have seen many of the torments which take place at Acheron often represented in paintings; but most certainly there is no Acheron equal to where I have been in the stone-quarries. There, in fine, is the place where real lassitude must be undergone by the body in laboriousness. For when I came there, just as either jackdaws, or ducks, or quails, are given to Patrician children, for them to play with, so in like fashion, when I arrived, a crow was given me with which to amuse myself. But see, my master’s before the door; and lo! my other master has returned from Elis.

HEGIO
Hail to you, my much wished-for son.

TYNDARUS
Ha! how — my son? Aye, aye, I know why you pretend yourself to be the father, and me to be the son; it is because, just as parents do, you give me the means of seeing the light.

PHILOCRATES
Hail to you, Tyndarus.

TYNDARUS
And to you, for whose sake I am enduring these miseries.

PHILOCRATES
But now I’ll make you in freedom come to wealth. For pointing to HEGIO this is your father; pointing to STALAGMUS that is the slave who stole you away from here when four years old, and sold you to my father for six minæ. He gave you, when a little child, to me a little child for my own service. He pointing to STALAGMUS has made a confession, for we have brought him back from Elis.

TYNDARUS
How, where’s Hegio’s son?

PHILOCRATES
Look now; indoors is your own brother.

TYNDARUS
How do you say? Have you brought that captive son of his?

PHILOCRATES
Why, he’s in-doors, I say.

TYNDARUS
By my faith, you’ve done both well and happily.

PHILOCRATES
pointing to HEGIO . Now this is your own father; pointing to STALAGMUS this is the thief who stole you when a little child.

TYNDARUS
But now, grown up, I shall give him grown up to the executioner for his thieving.

PHILOCRATES
He deserves it.

TYNDARUS
I’ faith, I’ll deservedly give him the reward that he deserves. To HEGIO. But tell me I pray you, are you my father?

HEGIO
I am he, my son.

TYNDARUS
Now, at length, I bring it to my recollection, when I reconsider with myself: troth, I do now at last recall to memory that I had heard, as though through a mist, that my father was called Hegio.

HEGIO
I am he.

PHILOCRATES
I pray that your son may be lightened of these fetters, and this slave be loaded with them.

HEGIO
I’m resolved that that shall be the first thing attended to. Let’s go in-doors, that the blacksmith may be sent for, in order that I may remove those fetters from you, and give them to him. They go into the house.

STALAGMUS
To one who has no savings of his own, you’ll be rightly doing so. coming forward.

Spectators, this play is founded on chaste manners. No wenching is there in this, and no intriguing, no exposure of a child, no cheating out of money; and no young man in love here make his mistress free without his father’s know ledge. The Poets find but few Comedies of this kind, where good men might become better. Now, if it pleases you, and if we have pleased you, and have not been tedious, do you give this sign of it: you who wish that chaste manners should have their reward, give us your applause.