My Father the Dude
Jeff Bridges
Jeff Bridges is an actor, painter, singer, photographer, and producer. Bridges, who comes from a prominent acting family, was born in Los Angeles, California, in 1949. He began his acting career with his father, Lloyd, in the series Sea Hunt and went on to star in films such as The Last Picture Show, Fat City, Heaven’s Gate, Tron, and Crazy Heart, for which he won an Oscar. He is perhaps best known for his role as the Dude in the Coen brothers film The Big Lebowski. He is married to Susan Geston, and they have three daughters, Isabelle, Jessica, and Haley.
Jeff with his daughters (from left to right), Hayley (eight years old), Jessica (ten years old), and Isabelle (twelve years old), on set in Los Angeles, 1993
my dad came from a family of actors. His father, Lloyd, was an actor. His mother, Dorothy, was an actor. His brother Beau is an actor, too. He knows firsthand how weird and challenging it can be to have an actor as a parent, which means he is very good at being a famous actor father.
When I was growing up, my dad was really hitting his stride. He made many of his greatest films, from The Fabulous Baker Boys to The Fisher King to Fearless, before I was ten years old. He was often away shooting for weeks at a time, leaving my mother to look after me and my two sisters. She likes to say she takes care of the empire—and she does.
But when my dad was at home, it was like having the greatest, most imaginative friend in the world. What makes him such a wonderful actor is the same thing that makes him a wonderful playmate: he’s a great pretender. He relished opening up his rich inner life to share with me and my sisters, and he was always happy to be part of ours, too. My sisters and I loved to dress him up, put flowers in his hair—he’s always had a nice head of hair—and decorate his face with makeup. When Dad was around, we’d draw or paint or just play pretend for hours. He has such a playful spirit. The only time he ever brought his work home with him was the day he returned from shooting Blown Away still in makeup, his face appearing all bloodied and bruised. I think he wanted to scare us, but we just loved peeling off the stretchy plastic fake blood from his face. It was really satisfying.
But, of course, he couldn’t always be at home. When he was away, Dad made sure we stayed connected. He’d call every night. He’d say something like, “Isabelle, when you’re asleep tonight, you’ll see a building. Go through the front door and climb up to the attic. What do you see?”
“I see the branch of an oak tree by the window,” I’d reply.
Then he’d ask, “Do you see the tree house nestled in the crook of the branch?”
I’d laugh and say I did.
“Let’s meet there tonight,” he’d say. “What are we going to do?”
“We’ll jump on our horses and ride to the mountains.”
“Sounds like a plan,” he’d say. In the morning, he’d call again, and we’d go over the adventures we’d had in our dreams the night before.
I always knew that my father was loving and sweet and playful, but it’s still funny to me that he’s become so closely identified with the Dude. By the time The Big Lebowski came out, I was in high school, and, just like a typical teenager, I had zero interest in my father’s work. (I still haven’t seen some of his films from that period.) What I remember most is that around that time, we were on vacation in Hawaii, and my dad was wearing those hideous Sun Jellies from the movie. They’re one of the most well-known parts of his costume, but they were actually my dad’s own shoes. Anyway, my sister and I were so embarrassed by those godawful jellies, we threw them into the ocean. Today, they’d probably be worth a lot of money. Another funny thing about people conflating Dad with the Dude is that he’s not really a laid-back guy. He gets anxious. He experiences stress. Before he goes onstage, he always says he doesn’t want to do it, and afterward, he is critical of himself. Though he describes himself as “Buddhish,” and certainly those are themes reflected in the Dude, he doesn’t project Zen calm.
He is, however, extremely present. Even more so now that he’s older and a grandfather. I have two kids of my own, and he is very focused on being in their lives. We live in Oakland, but he and my mom visit often. And when he’s not able to be with his grandkids, he calls to plan dream meetings with them, too.