Five weeks before
It was late afternoon but the darkening sky made it more like night. The sea wind hit the cliff tops around St Petroc announcing the arrival of November. The St Petroc stone circle stood out against the flat horizon, dark grey on light. Lit only by the distant streetlights of the village, a sodium sunset on the horizon.
Two figures sat on a fallen stone, sharing a torch between them. The stone had been worn flat over the centuries. Local legend stated it was once used for sacrifices. During the madness seven months ago it almost had been. Now Tom and Pearl sat there, huddled close. For warmth only, they would have both said had they been asked.
Tom had something to tell her.
‘So why have we come up here, then?’ Pearl laughed. ‘Crap idea for a date.’
Tom didn’t know how to reply. He pretended he hadn’t heard her. Nominally she was his boss at the Sailmakers Arms, the pub he worked in. But over the months they had become more than employer and employee. What that was hadn’t been fully explored. They weren’t lovers but they were more than friends. There was a connection Tom had felt only rarely. Once that might have delighted him. Now the thought scared him.
‘Neutral ground,’ he said. ‘You know what the pub’s like for gossip.’
She nodded. Their relationship was often a subject for speculation.
‘So you’ve got something to tell me,’ she said. ‘That’s what you said in the text. What’s all this secretive stuff for?’
He sighed. Thought. Knew he had no option but to tell her straight. ‘I’ve got to go away for a bit.’
She just stared at him. ‘Got to?’
‘Got to.’
‘What d’you mean?’
He looked at the ground, checking for any remaining scorch marks in the grass from that night seven months ago. They were barely there. The seasons had covered them. He looked at her. She was very attractive, he thought. Slightly younger than him, dark hair kept quite short, intelligent eyes, a mouth ready to laugh. Trying not to let the recent past define her. She had become so important to his life. He didn’t dare believe she would be thinking the same.
‘I’ve got to go. You know my . . . background? How I ended up here?’
Pearl nodded. She was one of the two people he had told the truth to. The other being Lila.
‘Well, as part of my deal with them I have to be on call. When they need me.’
‘And they need you now.’ Disappointment in her voice.
He nodded. ‘They’ve got a job for me.’ He turned to face her. ‘And they want you to have a place in it too.’
‘Me?’
‘They’ve given me a cover story. I just need you to corroborate it for me. If anyone comes looking, you know.’
‘Might that happen?’
‘I doubt it. But don’t worry. I’ve been in touch with an old mate. He’s going to be around to keep an eye on things. Just in case someone comes around trying to poke holes in the story.’
Her eyes widened. She looked scared. ‘What the hell’s going on? What are you talking about?’
‘It’s just a precaution, that’s all. Standard procedure, the way I used to operate. I’m being doubly safe. It’s silly, really. But I have to tell you. Please say if you’d rather not be part of it and they can think of something else.’
‘What is it?’
He told her. Blackmoor Prison. Noel Cunningham. His plausible cover story and her part in it. And how he would get it done as quickly as possible.
‘I’ll be back by Christmas. Promise.’
‘You’d better,’ she said, grateful for something she could cling to, ‘or you’ll get the sack. Busiest time.’ She looked at the ground. Her voice became smaller. ‘I need you there.’ She tried to smile. It could have broken his heart. ‘Isn’t it dangerous?’
He shook his head. ‘Not really. I just do what I’m supposed to, get out. Simple as that. It’ll be fine. Honestly.’
She stared at the ground. He was sure she wasn’t looking for scorch marks.
‘Never trust anyone who uses the word “honest”.’
‘Good advice,’ he said.
She shook her head. ‘It’s just . . . it’s a lot to take in. It’s . . .’ Another shake. ‘I don’t know. It’s like normal life has stopped suddenly. And now there’s . . . this.’ She looked up at him, eyes direct, locking. ‘Do you really have to do it? Isn’t there anyone else?’
‘I don’t know. I seem to be the best qualified, according to them. It’s fine. The pub’ll keep going.’
‘It’s not the pub I’m worried about.’
A wave crashed against the cliff behind them. The sea wind intensified. She moved towards him. Tom stayed where he was. She took his hand in hers.
‘Tom . . .’
‘Why do we have to meet out here? Where it’s freezing? What’s wrong with the living room or the pub?’
They both turned, hands dropping. Lila stood behind them.
‘I asked Lila to join us,’ said Tom. ‘She needs to know as well. Both of you do.’
‘Need to know what?’ asked Lila. ‘What’s all this about?’
Tom noticed a slight buzz of anger on her words. Was that because she had had to walk all the way to the stone circle or because Pearl was here too? Or was it something else?
‘You two announcing your engagement or something? Should I buy a hat?’
Lila sat down on the stone. ‘Budge up, then. What’s happening?’
‘Come and join us,’ said Tom. He smiled but it dissipated quickly. ‘I wanted you here as well.’
‘It’s freezing.’
‘OK, then.’ He looked between the two of them. His gaze settled on Lila. ‘I’ve told Pearl about this. Now it’s your turn.’ He sighed, hesitant, as if his next words would make something notional real. Both to them and himself. ‘I’ve got to go away for a bit.’
It looked like something had juddered to a halt inside Lila. ‘Why? Where?’
‘It’s . . .’ He leaned forwards, concentrating on his hands rather than looking at either of them. ‘You know who I am. Or who I used to be.’ Lila looked like she was about to be told a loved one was terminally ill. Pearl looked like she’d just received the same information.
‘I thought this might happen. I dreaded it, to be honest. And it seems I’ve got no choice.’
Lila stared at him. ‘They’re making you work again, aren’t they? They’ve got you a job.’
He nodded. ‘Undercover.’
‘But you’ve retired. You told me that.’
‘Yeah, I have. But I also told you that I have to be available when they want me. Price I pay for being left alone. After what happened here.’
‘That’s not fair. Tell them no.’
‘I wish I could. I can’t, it’s not like that.’
‘Just tell them . . .’ Anger and sadness fighting it out with Lila. It looked like a part of her was detaching, drifting away. Tom found it heartbreaking to watch.
But you’re coming back, aren’t you? It’s not going to be for long.’
Tom smiled. ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can. Believe me.’
‘For Christmas?’
‘A long time before then.’ Hopefully, he thought.
‘So where you going then?’
He told her. Everything he had just told Pearl. In as quiet and reasonable a voice as he could manage. Pearl watched Lila, checked her responses. Concern in her eyes.
Time passed. Eventually Lila looked up. ‘They won’t let you in without a cover story. Have you got one?’
‘He has,’ said Pearl. ‘It’s me. A customer overstepped the line and Tom had to put him right.’
Anger rose again in Lila. ‘When did all this happen? When did you decide this and why didn’t you tell me earlier?’
‘Pearl’s just found out now. I had to check with her first, make sure she was OK with it.’ He glanced across at her. There was something heavy in that look. ‘Not everyone would have agreed to it. Thank you.’
She shrugged, returning a gaze full of unsaid words.
Tom sat back. Looked at Lila. Reached for her hand. She pulled it away.
‘No,’ she said. ‘Not yet. You don’t get to do that yet.’
‘D’you want to ask me anything?’
Tom could see Lila was angry that he had told Pearl before her. Even if he did need to discuss it with her first. And annoyed at him keeping secrets from her. ‘Why didn’t you tell me sooner?’
‘It only happened this week. The plans were advanced before they brought me in. The cover story was already there. They just needed me and Pearl to fit round it. And I wanted to tell you in a place where no one could overhear. Both of you.’
Lila tried to take it all in. Didn’t reply.
‘You’re still going to be safe, still living in the house. Nothing’s changed.’
‘Maybe I could move in as well,’ said Pearl. ‘Girls together. Might be fun. Or at least company. We could—’
Lila stood up.
‘What’s the matter?’ asked Tom.
‘Shut up,’ she said.
‘But—’
‘Just shut up.’ Tears welled in her eyes. She looked angry with herself for allowing that to happen. Tom knew she had felt safe, secure with him. For the first time in a long time. Possibly for as long as she could remember. And now, to her, this safety was gone.
Tom stood up too. Reached out to her. ‘Lila . . .’
‘Leave me alone.’
She turned and ran back towards the village, stumbling as her tears blinded her.
Tom and Pearl watched her go.