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Flint looked at the note he had found right inside his door when he entered his room. It had been slid under the door. On the outside was only written his title, meaning that it could be from anyone, but somehow only seeing the letters, he knew that it was from Hester. They were round and soft and somehow reminded him of an owl. If anyone else had written the letter, he would have been disappointed.
He sat down on the edge of the bed, simply staring at his name written by her for another moment, before opening the letter. His body tightened at the thought of last night, while his conscience stirred in the back. He was not being fair to either Cecilia or Hester, but he could not help himself.
The missive was brief: She requested to meet him in one of the unused guest rooms at midnight tonight. Flint stared at the words, uncertain of how to react. As he had left her last night, he had promised himself, that he would not be alone with her again. And certainly not be intimate with her. It was beyond doubt now that he was in love with her, which was precisely why he needed to keep away from her.
One matter was that he was unable to control his emotions. He was however able to control his actions: He might as well finalize the papers and make the engagement official while he was there. That would perhaps make it easier for him to stay away from Hester. After this, he would only see her at social functions with many other people present where he would be able to avoid her.
Slowly Flint tore up the missive and threw it in the fire. Then he went in search of Mr. Gaywood to learn whether his future father-in-law had time to speak to him now.
***
“I am glad we are finally able to finalize the negotiations,” Mr. Gaywood said as he sat down in one of the sofas in front of the fireplace in the duke’s study. The duke had most graciously allowed them the use of the room while they finalized the last details in the contract.
Once it was signed, Flint would not have to think about Hester anymore. No matter what his mind conjured of images of the two of them together, he would know that it would never happen. As a gentleman, he would not be able to back out of the contract. His future would be settled – just as he wanted it to be.
Flint’s chest felt heavy as Mr. Gaywood opened the binder with the previous conditions that they had agreed upon, which mostly included the money and land that would be part of Cecilia’s dowry. He assumed the heaviness in his chest was due to being in one of Hester’s father’s most private rooms after having done ungentlemanly acts against his daughter only the night before. He was relieved that the duke was not there, taking part in the meeting.
He could only imagine what the duke would say if he knew how Flint had treated his youngest daughter. If he was the gentleman he thought himself to be, he would not have touched Hester. Or if so, he would have told Mr. Gaywood that he could not marry Cecilia and then find the duke and ask for Hester’s hand in marriage.
But he did not. Because this would be the best for the both of them. The three of them in fact. Cecilia would be a countess, Hester would find someone else, someone who would not be constantly afraid that something happened to her, and he, Flint, he would be... content. Happy would be a far stretch but his role in life was not to be happy, but to help those around him prosper.
He must have made a sound because Mr. Gaywood looked up from perusing the papers and raised his eyebrows in a questioning manner.
“Oh, I... It’s just a large decision it is all,” Flint stated and tried to smile, although he felt that it was more of a grimace.
“Of course, it is,” Mr. Gaywood said. “Not one to venture into lightly,” he added and sent Flint a look that he could not interpret. The thought that Mr. Gaywood might suspect that he was attracted to another woman was unsettling. Sophia and Percy already knew; he did not need others to figure it out as well. The house party would end in five days which seemed far too long to remain in the vicinity of Hester. He might have to come up with an excuse to leave early. Preferably one that had him leave the very next morning.
“Yes, indeed,” he answered Mr. Gaywood and tried to dry his brow without the other man noticing.
There was a knock at the door. Mr. Gaywood called for the person to enter, and Algernon Gaywood did.
“I hope you do not mind. Algernon will be your brother soon and I think it will be beneficial to him to watch the negotiations. Maybe even inspiring,” Mr. Gaywood jovially added and patted his son on the back, as the tall, thin man folded himself and sat next to his father.
“Well, if you...” Algernon Gaywood began.
“I have seen the way you and Lady Hester talk. I am certain that the two of you will be a great match. I have even discreetly enquired with the duke, and he would be favorable towards the match,” Mr. Gaywood stated.
Flint tasted bile in the back of his throat and swallowed several times without being able to rid himself of the taste. He wanted to have a drink but did not want the other men to notice him.
“Father,” Algernon Gaywood sighed in a tired voice. “Of course, the duke would be favorable, otherwise we would not have been invited to the house party to begin with. As for me marrying Lady Hester, I do not think that I can do it, since we are not in love.”
Flint took a large sip of his tea, only to choke on it, making both men look at him. He waved his hand in excuse, hoping to draw the attention away from himself.
“Love, such a modern concept. Your mother and I were never in love, but we have a very prosperous marriage, nevertheless. We have even sired eight children without love,” Mr. Gaywood said.
“Perhaps I should leave,” Flint suggested and was already rising. The conversation felt much too intimate and besides this, he had no interest in hearing Mr. Gaywood talk his son into marrying Hester.
“No, no, there is no need. Since you will soon be family, you will learn this in any event: Algernon wishes to marry the daughter of our local vicar, but both his grandfather and I have told him that she is unfit as a wife for him.”
“I am certain Sarah would manage with the proper training,” Algernon Gaywood said defensively and crossed his arms over his chest. “It will be many years until she would become a Lady if you allowed me to marry her. Both you and Grandfather would have to die before that happened and since Grandfather seems determined to live until he is a hundred and you might very well do the same. She will be at least sixty before it would become reality. I dare say that forty years should be sufficient time for her to learn how to manage an estate.”
Flint stared for a moment at the man that would soon become his brother. He had no idea that Algernon was in love, nor that this kind of passion lay hidden beneath his otherwise stoic demeanor. Flint moved in his seat, feeling the need to once again suggest that he left, yet he felt certain that Mr. Gaywood would still urge him to remain seated.
“Yes, well, let us not discuss this now.” Mr. Gaywood tried for a jovial tone of voice and patted his son’s arm.
Algernon Gaywood did not seem appeased, but he did not discuss the topic further. The conversation veered into the final details of land and bonds that were to be Cecilia’s dowry. Flint was relieved to immerse himself in this kind of conversation; he knew how to handle this; his grandfather had been training him since he was a child.
Time went by quickly and Flint had forgotten everything else than the matter at hand. He was surprised when they were once again interrupted by a knock on the door. Mr. Gaywood called for the person to enter once again as if it was his study and for a moment Flint assumed that it would be Cecilia since Mr. Gaywood almost seemed to be expecting the person. It was Hester, however. Flint’s heart pounded in his chest as he quickly rose along with the two other men.
For a moment she was simply staring uncomprehendingly at their small group.
“I beg your pardon,” she mumbled, and Flint could see how her gaze darted between the three of them. “I assumed my father was in here... I needed more ink...”
She took a step towards the desk, then stopped as if uncertain whether she should continue or not.
“I was just in my study next door... writing,” she held up her right hand, which had a few smudges of ink on it.
“We were finished as well?” Flint asked Mr. Gaywood. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw how Hester walked to the desk and pulled an extra ink blot from a top drawer.
“Yes, just one more thing. I would like the children to have my name as well,” Mr. Gaywood said.
Flint could tell that Hester froze in her movements, but he could not turn to look at her.
“Our firstborn son will be named Gaywood as his first name, surely you know the practice of my family,” Flint stated. He would make sure that there was only one child, which meant that this whole conversation was completely redundant.
“Naturally, I would not subject my grandson to be named Gaywood Gaywood Eavesgrave, but the others...” Mr. Gaywood smiled a little.
Flint understood the honor for the man in having his surname attached to that of Eavesgrave, but the notion of giving in to the man did not sit well with him. Even though he knew it would never come to be, he did not like to make the promise.
Hester moved towards the door and their eyes met for a moment. Both Mr. Gaywood and Algernon followed his gaze towards her.
“I beg your pardon,” she stated again. “I... I am clearly interrupting an important conversation. I’ll leave now.”
She hurried out the door and all but slammed it in her haste.
“You should follow her, Algernon,” Mr. Gaywood told his son and nudged him with his elbow. “She seemed upset, probably thinking of how Cecilia is to be married soon and she has not received any offers from her three suitors. Now would be a good time to...”
“Cease it, Father. I am not ready to give up my hope that I can marry Sarah with the family’s blessing. Lady Hester will only be of interest to me if Sarah decides that she does not wish to marry me.”
Mr. Gaywood looked as if he was about to spit something onto the table, but only remembered himself because Flint was there.
Flint was not certain whether it was the sight of Hester or simply a wish to appease Mr. Gaywood in any event he said:
“It is fine, Mr. Gaywood. Of course, it can be a stipulation on your part that we name the children Gaywood Eavesgrave if that is your wish.” He extended his hand to the other man.
“Then we should announce it at dinner.” Mr. Gaywood took his hand and practically beamed.
Flint only nodded, before taking the hand that Algernon Gaywood offered him as well. His only thought was that he needed to exit the room and find Hester. He needed to apologize to her for stumbling right into this scene. It was unfair of him, and he could have prevented it if he had been just slightly more thoughtful.