Misery set up camp inside John’s empty heart.
Passing the time without Sarah infiltrating his thoughts became impossible. He’d tried playing video games, but saw her in every character. She even appeared in the movies he watched. By late morning, he’d immersed himself in work, but there were only so many ways to restock the shelves and his mind kept wandering back to her. When the first customers arrived in the afternoon, he used them for conversation. Good thing they only needed a listener with their beer.
By five o’clock, he could almost function as a normal person. The place became noisy with the Friday night crowd.
He left the dining area to grab more napkins and upon his return Sarah was sitting at the bar. He ducked back into the hallway before she noticed him. What was she doing here? Had he not made himself clear? He should turn around and go back to his office. If he was smart, he’d do just that. But curiosity grabbed hold. So instead of turning around, he dropped the napkins off and headed in her direction.
She spotted him walking behind the bar and her eyes widened. He stopped in front of her, keeping a safe distance away, except no distance was safe from her tantalizing scent.
Her cheeks and nose were red as if she had been out in the cold. The whites of her eyes were red, too, but he didn’t think the outdoors caused that. She looked as miserable as he felt. And he felt pretty miserable knowing he was the cause.
“Hi, John. Can we talk?”
He indicated an empty booth across the room. Gathering her coat and purse, she slid off the stool and headed in that direction. He followed and sat across from her.
She squirmed in her seat, adjusting her slacks. Once she finished, she placed her hands on the table, fingers intertwined. “I came to apologize.”
Apologize? “I don’t understand.”
“I’m sorry I wanted to pay for the movie. I’m sorry for being too forward. I can do better. You acted like you liked me. I just want to make it better again.”
What the hell had Steven done to her? John had made the mistakes last night, not her, yet she was the one apologizing. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I did.”
“What did you do wrong?”
More than she could comprehend. “It’s complicated.”
She touched his hand. Caught off guard, he gasped at the sudden warmth. Her eyes widened in surprise. Shit. He pulled his hand away.
“You feel something, too, when we touch, don’t you?” she asked with a hopeful expression.
He didn’t want to hurt her again, but she gave him no other choice. Too chicken to look her in the eyes and see the pain he would cause, he stared down at the table, but she spoke before he had a chance to lie.
“Oh,” she sighed. “You must have loved her very much.”
She wasn’t making any sense. He looked up. Now she was the one staring at the table. “Loved who?”
“The person who hurt you. I understand. I’m afraid, too.” She looked up. “But I’m tired of my mind talking me out of everything. I want to listen to my body for a change. I get a thrill when I touch you, John. If you feel the same thing, don’t you want to try and see if it could be something better?”
He shook his head back and forth ever so slightly. She’d just given him the out he needed. It would be a lie—a big fat lie—but maybe this one wouldn’t hurt her as much.
* * * *
Sarah held her breath. Had she gotten through? Was John giving in?
He sat back and crossed his arms. “I still need time to get over…her. I’m sorry. It wouldn’t be fair to you.”
Oh God. How could she compete with another woman?
“Well, I tried,” she said, shrugging. “I hope you’re able to heal your heart. I think you have a lot of love to give.” She scooted out of the booth, grabbed her coat and purse, and headed for the door.
Her nose stung and eyes burned. She had to get out, and fast. She stopped long enough to don her coat. If he was watching, she didn’t know because she refused to turn around. She would leave with her head held high and no tears. After zipping up, she walked outside and took a deep breath, letting the cold air slap her. She’d made it, and without a scene. The breakdown could come once she got home.
In her haste to see John, she had left her car in the garage and now she was forced to walk back. Alone. The fear would eat her alive if she let it. Well, if she could confront John, she should be able to confront the garage. After another deep breath, she headed for her car.
She wasn’t but a few steps from Wings when someone grabbed her shoulder and spun her around.
“So, I find you here again, huh?” Steven’s breath reeked of beer and she grimaced.
Could the day get any worse? She wrenched her shoulder free. “It’s none of your business where I go. How many times do I have to tell you?”
He grabbed her throat and slammed her against the building. Pain blossomed on contact and she winced. His grip cut off her air supply. Crap. Why couldn’t she learn to keep her mouth shut? She grabbed his fingers and pulled—it had worked with her other assailant—but it only caused him to dig deeper into her neck.
“It’s my business if I say it’s my business, Sarah. Why do you have to torment me?”
White dots floated across her vision and her chest burned. If he didn’t let go soon, she would pass out. “I’m sorry, Steven. I didn’t mean it,” she croaked. “Please let me go. You’re hurting me. I can’t breathe.”
“I should strangle you, then maybe you wouldn’t make my life miserable.”
He slammed his mouth against hers. This was always his way. Scare her and then apologize by seducing her. It had worked in the past because she thought he loved her. But he didn’t love her. He only loved her looks and the status that had brought him—the only reason he’d never hit her face. Well, she wasn’t his damned status symbol any longer.
She rammed her knee into his groin. A squeaky moan escaped between his lips and his eyes bulged in pain. Or was that shock? Whatever, the best result came when he released her.
If only she’d hit him square, he might have fallen to the ground. Instead, he doubled over, the same as Sarah did to catch her breath. But she didn’t have the luxury of time on her side. Quickly gathering her wits, she ran toward the garage. With luck, he’d be down long enough for her to reach the safety of her car.
The garage door was in sight; the handle beckoned. He slammed into her and she cried out as she crashed into the building. Grabbing her shoulder, he spun her around. He backhanded her before she had a chance to block his punch or catch her breath. Pain exploded in her right cheek. She went flying and bounced off the wall.