The row of tall attached cottages with a double peak on the roof of each one was set at a slight angle to the beach, so that architecturally they could be set back, one from the next, to provide total privacy for the individual walled gardens where the small swimming pools were.
The row of cottages was back a hundred feet and more from the beach. Between the front gates of the cottages and the beach itself was a private expanse of sand, landscaped palms, sea grapes, almond trees with sun chaises spotted about at intervals far enough apart for privacy.
I put on swim trunks and took up a position on a chaise fifty feet from my front gate, turning it in such a way I could watch the gate of number 50. By then it was past noon. The tropic sun had such a hefty sting I knew that even my deep and permanent tan would not be immune, not without a little oil and a little limitation on the exposure time.
At twenty minutes to one the gate opened, and a young woman came out. She was of medium height, delicately and gracefully built. Her dark hair was quite long, and she had a white band above her forehead clipping it in place. She seemed to be somewhere in her twenties. I could not make a closer guess at that distance. She wore eccentric sunglasses with huge round lenses in dark amber. She wore a don’t-swim-in-it bikini fashioned of white elasticized cord and swatches of watermelon-colored terrycloth. She was two shades darker than Mia Cruikshank, a perfect and even tan which could only have come from untold hours of total discipline and constant care.
A man came out with her. Youngish, lithe, laughing and saying something which made her laugh. Awesomely muscled, moving well so that muscles bulged and slid under the red-bronze tan. A Riviera swimming outfit, little more than a white satin jockstrap. She walked a few steps and then turned in a proprietary way and went back and tested to see if the gate was locked. She looked in her small white Ratsey bag, apparently to make sure that her key was there. Then they walked toward the hotel.
My heart had turned heavy, and there was a taste of sickness in my throat. But you have to be certain, terribly certain. Like a biopsy. Make absolutely sure of the malignancy. Because the surgery is radical.
I gave them five minutes and then followed the same route. I found them in another of the ubiquitous thatched bars, having a drink at a shady table and still laughing. A cheerful pair. I went to the bar and ordered a drink. When I had a chance, I asked the bartender if the woman at the table was a certain Lois Jefferson. He looked troubled. He said he knew them by the numbers. Just a moment, please. He went to the other end of the bar and came back with a signed drink tab. Mary D. Broll. Number 50. He showed it to me. I thanked him, said I was wrong. I winked at him and said, “But that is not Mr. Broll?”
He had a knowing smile. “It is just a friend. He has been a friend for a week, I think. He works, I think, on a private boat. That is what I hear. It is easy to make friends here.”
I picked my drink up and moved along the bar to a stool that was about a dozen feet from their table. I turned around on the stool, my back to the bar, and looked at her with obvious and amiable and very thorough appreciation. She was worth appreciating, right from her brown, slender, tidy little ankles right on up—not too quickly—to a ripely cushioned little mouth, dark eyes set at an interesting tilt, a broad, immature, and vulgar little nose.
She put her glasses back on and leaned over and said something to her nautical friend. He put his drink down and turned around and stared back over his shoulder at me. I smiled and nodded at him. He had a Prince Valiant haircut, and his hair was the dark molten shade of some golden retrievers. His face had a tough, pinched, disadvantaged look which did not go with the Valiant hair or the beachboy body. I do not make any judgments about hair length, mine or anyone’s. I own some Sears electric clippers with plastic gadgets of various shapes which fit on the clippers to keep you from accidentally peeling your hair off down to the skull. I find that long hair is a damned nuisance on boats, on the beach, and in the water. So when it gets long enough to start to make me aware of it, I clipper it off, doing the sides in the mirror and the back by feel. The sun bleaches my hair and burns it and dries it out. And the salt water makes it feel stiff and look like some kind of Dynel. Were I going to keep it long, I would have to take care of it. That would mean tonics and lotions and special shampoos. That would mean brushing it and combing it a lot more than I do and somehow fastening it out of the way in a stiff breeze. Life is so full of all those damned minor things you have to do anyway, it seems nonproductive to go looking for more. So I go hoe the hair down when it attracts my attention. The length is not an expression of any social, economic, emotional, political, or chronographic opinion. It is on account of being lazy and impatient. No reason why the male can’t have long, lovely, dark-golden hair if he wants it. But it is a personal decision now, just as it was during the Crusades and the Civil War.
He kept staring right at me, and I kept smiling at him. So he got up fast and rolled his shoulders as he covered the twelve feet to stand in front of me, bare feet spread and braced.
“Chief, stop the birddog routine. You’re annoying the lady.”
“Me? Come on now! Don’t let her kid you. Lois and I have known each other for a long time. She knows I like to look at her. Always have. And I know she likes being looked at. Right, dear?”
“You’re out of your tree, chief. Knock it off. She isn’t Lois.”
I stood up. “She’s Lois Jefferson. Believe me!” I edged by him as he tried to block me away from the table. “Lois, honey. It’s Gav Lee, for God’s sake. It was a good joke, but let’s not run it into the ground.”
She took the glasses off and looked up at me. “Really, I’m not Lois. I’m Mary Broll. Really.”
I boggled at her. “Not Lois Jefferson from Scarsdale? Not Tom’s wife?”
It sucked in the fellow nicely. He was all alerted for games. When you roam in public with an item like that woman, you keep the guard way up. “Honey,” he said, “how about this clown? You get it? Tom Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson. Stop annoying us, chief, or I’ll call the—”
I turned on him. “Really. Would it put too much of a strain on you to have a little common courtesy? Her husband has always had the nickname Tom, for quite obvious reasons. His real name is …” I turned back to her. “What is Tom’s real first name, dear?”
She laughed. “But I am really not your friend!”
I stared at her. “That can’t be possible. It’s the most fantastic look-alike.… You wouldn’t believe.… Miss Broll, would you—”
“Mrs. Broll.”
“I’m sorry. Mrs. Broll, would it be rude of me to ask you to stand up for just a moment?”
“I guess not.”
“Now just one goddamn—”
I turned on him again. “What harm can it do, Mr. Broll?”
She stood up beside her chair. I moved closer to her, and I stared into her eyes from close range. “By God, I am wrong. I would never have believed it. You are a little bit taller than Lois, and I think your eyes are a darker shade, Mrs. Broll.”
“Now go away,” the man said.
As she sat down she said, “Oh, shut up, Carl. You get so boring sometimes. The man made a mistake. All right? All right. Please forgive Carl, Mr.…”
“Lee. Gavin Lee. Gav to my friends.”
“I don’t see any friends of yours around here,” the man said.
She gave me a very pretty and well-practiced smile. “Gav, this rude animal is Carl Brego. Carl, shake hands nicely with Gav, or you can damned well take off.”
I saw the little tightening around his eyes and knew the childish bit he was going to try. So when he put his hand out, I put my hand into his much too quickly for him to close his hand to get my knuckles. I got my hand all the way back, deep into the web between thumb and finger. Then I could just maintain a mild, firm clasp and smile at him as he nearly ruptured his shoulder muscles trying to squeeze my hand to broken pulp.
“Sorry about the little misunderstanding, Carl,” I said. “I’d like to buy you two nice people a drink.”
He let go of my hand and sat down. “Nobody invited you to join the party, chief.”
He had fallen into that one, too. He was scoring very badly. I said, “I don’t expect to sit down with you, Carl. Why should I? I was going to go to that table way over there and have my own drink over there and send two to this table. You act as if I’m trying to move in on you. How far would I get, Carl? As you are not Mr. Broll, then this lovely lady is a friend of yours. You are having lunch together. Just the two of you. If I were having lunch with her, I would be very ugly about anybody trying to move in. I just think you overreact, Carl. I made a little mistake. You keep getting rude for no reason. But I’ll still buy those drinks. I was thinking of it as an apology, not a ticket to the party.”
So saying, I gave the lady a little bow and marched on over to my distant table and told the waiter to give them anything they might want. I sat with my back toward them.
It did not take her long. Four minutes, I think it was, before he appeared beside my chair, standing almost at attention.
“Excuse me. Mrs. Broll would be very happy if you would join us for lunch.”
I smiled up at him. “Only if you are absolutely certain you don’t mind, Brego.”
It hurt his mouth to say it. It hurt his whole face. “Please join us, Mr. Lee.”
All through lunch I knew Brego was waiting and planning. When I saw that he wasn’t at all upset that I was living just a few doors—or a few gardens—away from his pretty friend, I could almost guess the kind of routine he had figured out.
And during lunch I had managed to steer the conversation in a direction that gave me a chance to awaken more than a flicker of interest in her eyes and at the same time gave her a chance to shove a little blade into Carl Brego and give it a twist.
I said, “I take little flyers in island property sometimes. Actually, that’s why I’m here. Some associates said I ought to take a look at this one. Anyway, usually I like to pyramid, but quite a while ago I got into Freeport up in the Bahamas at the right time and got out at exactly the right time with much more than I’d expected, so I thought I’d give myself a little present. So I bought this great big, ridiculous brute of a schooner in Nassau and had the yard that sold it to me hire aboard a crew, and I actually set out for this island. But the guest I invited aboard for the trip became terribly seasick. We made it as far as Great Inagua and got off, both of us, at Matthew Town and arranged passage from there back to civilization. I had the crew take the boat back to Nassau. As I remember, my accountants told me the net loss was something like thirteen thousand dollars after I had the yard resell the schooner. But it would have been cruel and unusual punishment to have made the young lady sail one more mile.”
Something behind her dark eyes went ding, and a cash drawer slid open in her skull. She counted the big bills and shut it again and smiled and said, “Carl knows all about yachts. He sails one around for a very fat rich lady, don’t you, darling?”
“That must be very interesting,” I said.
“He’s waiting on Grenada until she arrives with friends,” the woman said. “You know. Like a chauffeur, parked somewhere.”
“Knock it off,” Carl said in a small humble voice.
“Please?” she said.
“Please.”
And that made it even more imperative. I decided I was reading her well enough to see that she knew the direction the tensions would take and would give the ceremony a chance to get under way at the first opportunity. And would want to watch.
When we got to her gate, there was no one in sight. The breeze had stopped. Sweat popped out immediately on all three of us. I felt it run down my back.
“Do come in, Gav,” she said. “Do join us.”
She was starting to unlock the gate. Carl said, “So it’s enough already.”
“Enough?” she said blankly. “Enough?”
“Honey, the guy is taking a cheap shot, and I’m going to run him off.”
She licked her mouth. “Carl, sweetie, why do you have to be—”
“You can go in out of the heat, or you can stay and watch how it’s done, Mary. Either way I run this smartass off.”
“Any special direction?” I asked.
“Pick the one you like best, chief,” he said with a jolly grin of anticipation. “Start now and save yourself grief.”
“Take your best shot, Brego.” He took it. I was worried that he might know too much about what he wanted to do. If he did, it was going to take a long time in the hot sun, and if he didn’t, it could be reasonably quick.
He did a little bounce, a little prance. He pawed with the clumsy, measuring left and then came leaping in, following up on the right hook that he had brought up from about five feet behind him, practically at ground level. He did not know what he was doing. People who know do not go around taking the chance of hitting the solid bone of skull or jaw with the bare fist. A broken hand is incapacitating. It takes a long, tiresome time to heal. He wanted to pop me one and let the momentum carry him into me so he could get his hands and arms on me and put those muscles to work. He gave me lots of time for a decision. If I fell back away from it, he was going to tumble onto me. That way I might get a thumb in my eye before I could unwind and unravel him. The footing in the soft sand was a little uncertain for savate. So I moved forward, a little to my right, to take me inside that long, sweeping hook.
I felt it go around me, and I let his momentum then drive me back. I drove both hands, fingers spread, into his long hair, I clenched hard and went down pulling him on top of me but getting my knees up against my chest in time. One shoe slipped off his sweaty body, but the sole of the other stayed in place against his belly, and momentum gave me enough leverage to push him up and over. It was a good, high kick, and he spun well. By then I was on my back with my hands straight up over my head.
He hit the soft sand flat on his back with one hell of a whump. It exploded the air out of his lungs. I was up first, and I moved into position, waiting for him. He got up slowly, gagging for air. As he pushed up, I cranked his arm around behind him and put my other hand on the nape of his neck and ran him into the weathered boards of the garden fence, quite close to the woman. He splintered a board with the top of his head. She squeaked and chewed her fist. I dragged him back by the ankles, face down. I picked him up and stood him on his noodle legs and slapped him until he started to come around. Then I bent him over and ran him into the fence again. I dragged him back again, and I turned his feet until he rolled over onto his back. I slapped him where he lay, and when he stirred and his eyes came into focus, I levered his mouth open by bracing the heel of my hand against his chin. I packed his mouth full of soft hot sand, from the back of his throat to his pretty, white teeth. He came sputtering and gagging onto his hands and knees and coughed himself sick. I grabbed the hair and pulled his head up and back.
“Nod if you can understand me, Brego.” He nodded. “Do you want me to break any bones? Do I have to do that?” He shook his head. “She isn’t your woman any more. Understand?” He nodded. “Now I am going to start kicking your ass. You better head for the beach. If I ever see you back here, I’ll break some bones.”
I went around behind him and got a pretty good soccer kick into it, using the side of my foot. On the upswing. It slid him onto his face. He came scrambling up with more energy than I expected, but I got him again just as he got his feet under him and his hands free of the sand. Three running steps and he landed on his face again but didn’t spend any time resting. He got up and went into a wobbly scuffling run, fists against his chest, not daring or wanting to look back.
I watched him and then turned and looked at the woman. She gave me a very uncertain smile. There was an unhealthy skin tone under that deep lovely tan. “I … I thought you were going to kill him.”
“Kill him? What in God’s name for?”
“Well … it was so quick and so terrible.”
“He won’t be back, Mary. Are you going to miss him, particularly? You going to be lonesome?”
“That would depend, wouldn’t it?”
“Is there any of his stuff in there?”
“Not much. A few things.”
“Anything worth his coming back after?”
“I wouldn’t think so. No.”
“Now you can invite me in again.”
Her color was back. “You take a hell of a lot for granted.”
I put a knuckle under her chin and tilted her face up and looked at it inch by inch, a long and interested search. “If you want, girl, I can throw you back, like an undersized mackerel. The world is full of Carl Bregos. It’s up to you.”
She twisted her chin free. “I guess I wouldn’t want to be thrown back, Gav. I guess it wouldn’t fit my image. Was there really a Lois Jefferson?”
“If you think there was.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Then there never was such a girl.”
“Poor Carl. Do you always get what you want?”
“I usually get what I think I want.”
She tilted her shoulders one way, her hips the other. Her look was challenge. “And sometimes you find out you didn’t really want it after all. Me, too. Win a little, lose a little, huh?”
“If you wanted Brego, you’d still have him. I wouldn’t have gotten to say more than two words to you.”
“Like I was saying when we were so rudely interrupted, you want to come into my house? It’s hot out here when the wind quits.”
So we went in, and I wondered why I could find no trace of a Canadian accent. She had to be Lisa Dissat.