Unnamed freighter, non-system space
A loud scraping sound was the first thing Ed became aware of, the second was a stinging sensation between his shoulder blades. Then something clunked against the back of his head and as he gradually became aware of his surroundings. He discovered he was trussed up with tape and being dragged through the ship by his feet.
He wriggled violently and whoever was pulling him along dropped his feet.
‘Ah, you’re awake are you?’ said Giner, leering down at him. ‘It would’ve been better for you if you weren’t. Then you wouldn’t’ve known what’s coming next.’
‘They’ll execute you if you murder me,’ Ed mumbled, trying to work the numb muscles in his face.
‘I’m wanted for murder in four systems already, so I don’t think another is really an issue. Just think yourself lucky the captain didn’t let Kul’man have her way with you. It gives me the shivers what she likes to do with that combat knife. She’s seriously perverted.’
‘Just take me down to the hangar and put me in my ship and you’ll never see me again,’ Ed said, a little clearer this time.
‘Dream on…that ship’s worth billions. It’s our retirement pot,’ he replied, picking Ed’s legs up again and continuing to drag him.
They came to a T-junction.
‘Would you like the port airlock or starboard?’ he asked, then sniggered and turned left anyway not waiting for a reply.
Ed tried to implement his DOVI, but it seemed the strong pulse of the stun shot had overloaded the delicate system and all he got was white noise and gobbledygook. He grimaced again as his head bumped over a bulkhead joint in the floor, then Giner dropped his feet again as they arrived at the airlock.
‘Here we are,’ he said, almost cheerily. ‘End of the road.’
‘Less of the chit-chat and more action,’ said the captain, approaching from behind.
Ed stretched his neck to look up to him.
‘Just remember, when you’re being sentenced to death, I gave you another choice,’ Ed said, attempting to sound as unafraid as he could, when in fact it was quite the opposite.
‘Oh, really?’ said the captain, glancing up at Giner with a quizzical expression.
‘To put him in his little ship and let him go,’ said Giner, chuckling again.
The captain looked back down at Ed ruefully.
‘Retire with a billion in the bank, or let the man who tried to kill me go?’ He rubbed his chin comedically as if actually debating the choice. ‘You know, hard decision, but I think I’d like to retire in luxury thanks all the same.’
He looked up at Giner again.
‘Open the door,’ he growled, nodding at the airlock. ‘Get rid of this pain in the arse.’
The lock disengaged and the heavy door whirred to the right, disappearing inside the wall.
Giner rolled Ed inside, gave him a wink and stepped back.
The girl, Kul’man sprinted around the corner and waved at them.
‘He sent a coded transmission to the Dasos system, Captain,’ she said, panting from the exertion.
The captain glanced down and glared at Ed.
‘What did you send? And to who?’ he snapped.
‘Full details of the three of you, this vessel and the crimes you’ve committed,’ Ed replied.
‘Shit,’ said Giner, looking up at the captain. ‘What do we do?’
‘Sorry,’ said Ed. ‘Seemed like the responsible thing to do.’
‘Who’d you send it to?’ the captain asked again.
‘Admiral of the Fleet.’
‘Oh, fuck,’ said Giner, putting his hand on his forehead. ‘We’ll have the whole GDA fleet hunting for us.’
‘No system will be safe,’ said Kul’man, pulling out her knife and pointing it at Ed. ‘I’m going to cut you to fucking ribbons, you bastard.’
‘Stop fucking flapping,’ the captain shouted. ‘We’ll be billionaires shortly. We can all change our identities and disappear, it’s a big galaxy.’
He turned to point at Kul’man.
‘Put that away, get to the cockpit and get us some embedded jumps away from here, right now,’ he ordered.
Kul’man gave Ed a filthy look, sheathed her knife and sprinted away, swearing under her breath.
The captain stepped into the airlock and kicked Ed in the stomach.
‘Piece a shit,’ he snarled, stepped back and pointed at the airlock control. ‘Shut the door.’
Ed didn’t have much time to worry about what was coming. Even though he knew it wouldn’t make a blind bit of difference, he held his breath and shut his eyes. He heard the inner door hiss shut again and the lock clunk as it engaged. He braced himself as he heard the outer door unlock and the whine of the door motor.
‘Hello, Edward,’ said a voice he recognised. Neferuptah floated just outside the door in all her finest regalia and her hands on her hips. Somehow she was also preventing the atmosphere from escaping. ‘Having problems with some lowlifes?’ she said, waving a hand at the inner door.’
The inner door snapped open a lot quicker than it was designed to.
Giner and the captain just stood rooted to the spot, their eyes wide and mouths open in shock.
‘Good morning,’ Neferuptah said, cheerily. ‘Were you about to murder my friend?’
She wagged a finger at them, and there was a shudder from underneath the ship.
‘Oh, dear,’ she said. ‘I think that might’ve been your array having a terminal malfunction. I fear Kul’man might have a problem with those embedded jumps now.’
‘Who, who the Ancients are you?’ the captain stammered, glancing nervously past her at open space behind her.
‘Yes, I am,’ she said, then noticing the direction of his gaze. ‘Ah, you’re wondering what’s keeping you alive right now, aren’t you?’
Ed felt his bonds evaporate into thin air and rubbing his stomach where the captain had kicked him, he stood up and dusted himself down. He smiled at Neferuptah and stood aside as she floated into the airlock, coming face to face the two confused pirates.
‘What would you like me to do with them, Edward?’ she asked.
Kul’man appeared, sprinting back around the corner.
‘Something’s happened to the array, boss…oh!’ she grunted, seeing Neferuptah for the first time. ‘Who the fuck are you? And what are you wearing?’ she asked, pulling a hand weapon out of a holster.
‘I wouldn’t do that if I were you,’ said Ed, shaking his head.
‘I’ve had just about all I can stomach from you,’ she said, pointing the pistol at Ed and pulling the trigger.
There was a little musical toot and a little red flag popped out from the barrel.
Kul’man turned the weapon in her hand and gazed at the small pennant in utter amazement.
Ed snorted.
‘I think someone’s been watching some old Earth comedy,’ he said.
‘Did you like that, Edward?’ she asked, smiling.
‘Oh, yeah. Andy would’ve loved that too. Is he okay by the way?’
‘He’s fine and a very busy boy.’
‘Erm,’ grunted Kul’man, noticing and seemingly puzzled by the fear her colleagues were showing, then suddenly becoming aware that both airlock doors were open to space. ‘How the fuck aren’t we all dead?’ she said, peering past them.
‘Because I haven’t decided whether you should stay alive or not,’ said Neferuptah, turning to Ed. ‘You haven’t answered my original question, Edward,’ she said, raising her eyebrows.
‘We need to secure them and hand them over to the authorities,’ he said, shrugging.
‘Are you sure? They were about to kill you,’ she said, seemingly surprised. They could all pop outside.’ She stepped to one side and waved her hand at the cold of space behind them.
‘Too easy for them, they need to spend time regretting some of their life decisions.’
‘You know…you’d make a very good junior Ancient,’ she said, pursing her lips.
‘Don’t even go there,’ he said, his eyes wide. ‘I don’t think I could cope with that level of responsibility. Look what it did to Lake.’
‘Ah, but Lake was a liar and as corrupt as they come.’
‘I’m not perfect either.’
‘Nobody is,’ she said. ‘Least of all me.’
‘Are you trying to make out you’re an Ancient or something?’ sneered Kul’man. ‘I bet this is all a fucking holographic hoax.’
She pulled out her knife and threw it with all her might at Neferuptah. It spun through the air, slowed and the point of the blade stopped an inch from Neferuptah’s nose. She inspected both sides of it as it hung there and nodded.
‘Hmm,’ she grunted. ‘Quality blade…titanium.’
She flicked a finger and the knife flew back the way it came and buried itself in the centre of Kul’man’s chest.
‘NO,’ shouted Ed, looking on in horror.
Kul’man dropped to her knees. With her eyes wide in shock, she opened her mouth to scream, but gurgled a cough and splattered blood in an arc around her.
‘Neferuptah,’ Ed cried. ‘I didn’t want this.’
She smiled and lifted a finger up slowly as if telling him to wait. The knife dropped out of Kul’man’s chest and clattered to the floor. All the blood disappeared and as Kul’man was finally able to emit an ear-piercing scream, she stared down at her chest, the fatal wound completely gone.
‘Perhaps you should remain on your knees in my presence,’ said Neferuptah. ‘Don’t ever insult me again, mortal human.’
The captain and Giner just gawped and remained frozen to the spot.
Ed caught a glimpse of the starfield behind him change suddenly.
‘Have we just moved?’ he asked, turning to peer outside.
‘I’ve brought you back to the Prasinos system,’ she said. ‘I believe Andrew and the rest of your crew will be very pleased to see you and you can help with the bug hunt.’
‘Can’t you help us with that?’ Ed asked. ‘After all, it was your husband who brought them into this galaxy.’
Neferuptah waved a finger again and the three pirates all disappeared suddenly. She turned to Ed, an irritated expression on her face.
‘Well, it’s true isn’t it? Ed added. ‘You could just end this with a wave of your finger.’
Neferuptah sighed.
‘Indeed I could, human,’ she snarled. ‘But gods don’t react well to being told what to do.’
‘No, ma’am, sorry,’ Ed said, quickly realising he seemed to have overstepped a boundary with her.
‘You must realise that we’re your creator but not your protector,’ she said, her tone calming again. ‘I am genuinely impressed with this conglomeration you call the GDA. In many ways it seems we’ve got at least one galaxy about right, but there comes a time when you have to face potential extinction events and overcome it yourselves with your own ingenuity. This is one of those moments and I’m sure there will be more.’
Ed nodded, as she took his arm and led him back into the corridor. The two airlock doors closing behind them.
‘What the hell is that stink?’ she asked, pulling a sour face.
‘I don’t believe these pirates know the meaning of the word hygiene,’ said Ed. ‘Pretty ripe isn’t it? Where are they, by the way?’ he asked, staring down the empty corridor.
‘In a cell on the admiral’s ship,’ she said, walking up the corridor with a raised hand and gradually fading out of existence. ‘Go and win the war and if I were you, I’d claim salvage rights on this vessel.’ Her voice boomed around him. ‘And don’t forget my earlier offer. It will remain open. Au revoir.’
Ed, now alone, took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. He wrinkled his nose at the smell and steadied himself against the airlock door as the realisation of how close that had been hit him and his legs turned to jelly. If it wasn’t for her intervention, he’d be very dead right now. Forcing his legs to wobble him in the direction of the hangar and his ship, he said a little prayer of thanks to a god who wasn’t always invisible.
‘You’re welcome, Edward.’