Chapter Fourteen
I smiled at the flight attendant. “Yes, please.”
I wasn’t even disgusted with myself when she set the flute in front of me and I giggled. I was in heaven, and nothing could upset me now. Ten days in Hawaii was something I would have never dreamed of three weeks ago. Now, Glenn and I were on our way to the island of Oahu.
I leaned a little closer to him. He took my hand in his and lifted it to his lips for a kiss.
“I love you, Mrs. Wheeler.”
Mrs. Wheeler. The name sounded so old.
“I love you, too,” I said and took a sip of champagne.
“But?” he asked. “I know that look. You love me, but there’s a but in there.”
“My name. Should I keep Ravens for work? Should I go by Jo Ravens-Wheeler? I don’t want anyone calling me Mrs. Wheeler. It makes me sound like a schoolteacher – or a lunch lady.”
He laughed and kissed my hand again. “Well, if you want my honest opinion, Ravens is the name of a man you used to be married to. It would be nice if you’d let it go, but I’ll go along with whatever you decide. Jo Wheeler doesn’t sound like a lunch lady, and the name has a nice ring to it.”
I twisted the rings on my finger. He was right. I was comfortable in the name Jo Ravens, but it was time for a new chapter in my life to start, and a new name would be fitting. I leaned over and pecked him on the lips. “Jo Wheeler it is.”
“Good. I’m just happy to be able to call you my wife.” His smile was broad, and I noticed the flight attendant’s gaze lingering on his face longer than necessary.
I felt no jealousy. This sexy hot man with a dimple that buckled your knees was my husband. It was almost too much to believe.
It was only three days ago that Barbie and her husband were arraigned in court. The district attorney assured us Barbie would be going away for life, and her husband would be behind bars for many years. Arnie said they were married in Mexico, but because of the extra curricular activities of both of them, they kept separate housing in the States, and Barbie used her maiden name.
It killed me to tell Sergeant Rorski the flash drive with Barbie confessing to her crimes was burning in Jean’s fireplace, but he took the news well. Glenn told me later that Barbie wrote a full confession at the station the night he brought her in. She knew he already had her words on tape, so she followed procedure and wrote it all down.
Jean Young’s arm had been wrenched from the socket, resulting in a dislocated shoulder. She was going to be fine.
Harvey wasn’t happy to see me, but he was happy to take over the matters of Barbie’s husband. When Malloy’s apartment was raided, not only were there large amounts of marijuana in one bedroom, but there were copious amounts of cocaine and prescription painkillers in the other. There would be no getting out of the narcotics and racketeering charges brought by the federal government.
No charges were brought against Lucille. The gun was registered to her, and she had a legal carry permit. The amount of marijuana was small enough to be deemed a misdemeanor with a one hundred and fifty dollar fine, but no record. She was already asking around town to find a new dealer. She said the wacky weed made her hip feel better.
Glenn was reprimanded and given a four-week suspension without pay. Not turning in a person wanted for murder was more than Sergeant Rorski could overlook. That, and his colluding with me to get the confessions from Barbie, forced the sergeant’s hand.
Glenn came home early yesterday evening, after having taken my truck to a shop specializing in cleaning and detailing, and found me in the basement staring at the whiteboard. Keith had been in here since I moved out, adding clues to what might have happened to the Buxley Beaver mascot costume. The answer was right there for him to see, but it didn’t look like he had connected the dots yet.
“Do you have this crime solved yet?” Glenn asked. “I’m getting tired of running down leads, and everyone up at the school is hyperventilating over their missing beaver.”
“I can’t believe you haven’t studied Keith’s clues and solved it yourself. Buxley will never have a detective if someone doesn’t step up.”
He stood back, hands on hips, and read every item carefully. “For one thing, he draws better than you do.”
I backhanded him on the chest. “He drew a beaver. How hard can that be?”
He grimaced at my words, but couldn’t help smiling.
“Ok, let me get serious,” he said. “The doggone thing has been spotted around town, but it doesn’t fit whoever is wearing it, so it’s probably not an adult or a high school student. We have to think younger.”
“What if it’s a vertically challenged adult?” I asked, trying to throw him off. “If Pepper wore the costume, it would look like there was a little kid in there.”
He ignored me. “How would a kid get access to it? The sightings have been brief, so he doesn’t want to get caught.”
“What if it’s a girl?”
He ignored me again, sidestepped over to another part of the board, and pointed to a list of animals. “What’s this all about?”
“Jimmy Faust’s mother hates that the school uses a beaver for their mascot. It’s been brought up over and over at council meetings that the third graders have to write a report on beavers during school pride week, and every year, a few of them get more than they bargained for when researching. No one in authority wants to be the person to put an end to the beaver, so she’s on a mission to have the mascot changed herself. She’s circulating a petition and asking signers to vote for a new animal. Those are the top five choices.”
Glenn read the list aloud. “The Buxley Bandicoots. The Buxley Black Bears. The Buxley Balloonfish.” He furrowed his brow and laughed. “Has anyone ever used a balloonfish for a school mascot? The Buxley Badgers. The Buxley Bloodhounds. Personally, I wouldn’t vote for any of these. Keep the beaver.”
“Do you have any idea where the costume is?” I asked.
“Not a clue.”
I gave him a smug smile. “It’s in Jimmy Faust’s house. His mother is a booster club member, and I think she swiped it. Jimmy must have discovered where she kept it hidden, and when she wasn’t home, he took it and put it on somewhere around town. I would even bet Keith’s worn it a few times.”
A smile spread across his face. “That little devil. I think you’re right.” He grasped my arm and led me to the loveseat.
“Sit down,” he said.
I laughed and sat down. “Ok. Now what?”
He knelt in front of me and pulled my engagement ring from his pocket. “Jo Ravens, will you marry me? Tomorrow?”
“What?” I squealed. “Tomorrow? We can’t get married tomorrow. What about the double wedding with Nancy and Hank?”
“I can’t wait that long. Let them have their day. We’ll have ours tomorrow.” As if to sweeten the pot, he pulled two first-class tickets to Hawaii from his pocket. “We leave late tomorrow afternoon for vacation no matter what your answer is, but I’d like it to be our honeymoon.”
I was gobsmacked, dumbfounded, and thunderstruck, but not horrified. I threw my arms around his neck and whispered, “Yes!”
It’s not necessary to review what happened next on the loveseat in the basement, but it involved getting my ring back on my finger. I was pleasantly surprised later that evening when we were packing, and he brought my repaired watch to me.
“You know what,” I said. “I think this watch will always remind me of what we’ve just been through, and if we could make it through that mess, we can make it through anything.”
“My thoughts exactly,” he said and held up two horrible Hawaiian shirts. “Which one should I wear on the plane tomorrow?”
“The orange one, of course,” I said with a laugh.
We’d both been laughing or smiling ever since. We had been at the courthouse early this morning, obtained our marriage license, and we asked two strangers in the hallway to be witnesses for us. We were lucky and missed seeing that nasty, snoopy Vicki who worked at the bank as well as the courthouse, so we knew we wouldn’t be on the beauty shop gossip line anytime soon. I’d wait until we were in Hawaii before calling Mama, Pepper, and Hank.
We transferred planes in Los Angeles, and we were now enjoying our champagne while waiting for a group of passengers whose flight had arrived late. We were the only people in first class, so the late group was either a group of businessmen, or we were the only ones on the plane who had sprung for the exorbitant fare. I wasn’t comfortable to ask Glenn how he managed to pay for such an expensive vacation-honeymoon for us, but I would eventually.
I heard an odd yet familiar noise as the footsteps of the late arrivals thundered down the temporary ramp to the airplane’s door. I needed some new adjectives, because the way I felt next was way beyond gobsmacked and thunderstruck.
“I got her,” Keith yelled, and I heard him spray the air freshener.
Lucille was first through the doorway, smelling strongly of lavender. Keith was behind her.
“Wait a minute, young man,” the flight attendant said, stopping him. “How did you get through security with that can? You can’t have that in here.”
“If you take the can away from me, you’ll be sorry,” he said.
“Keith!” Pepper said sharply from just outside the door. “Give the lady the can.”
“Ok,” he said, handing it over. “But you might have to drop the oxygen masks over the Pacific Ocean. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
I managed to pick my jaw off the floor and looked at Glenn. He had a bigger than huge smile on his face.
“You knew they were coming!” I accused him.
He laughed. “They didn’t mind being left out of the wedding, but they wanted to come along on the honeymoon.”
I couldn’t stop shaking my head in disbelief as Buck and Kelly followed Lucille, Keith, and Pepper onto the plane. Mama and Roger boarded next, then Aunt Bee and Max, Hank and Nancy, and finally the last member of the Blue Hat Society, Rita. Each of them congratulated us as they passed. I was numb as I accepted hugs and kisses.
The attendant waited while one more person boarded. It was Floyd. I had no adjectives left at all when he sat down next to Rita and gave her a quick kiss on the lips.
“How in the world could anyone in my family afford this?” I asked softly. I looked at Glenn and asked, “How can we afford it?”
Lucille leaned across the aisle and said, “Dead Archibald’s paying for all of us – you two included. He doesn’t need the money anymore.”
Mama was behind me and leaned up over the seat. “Archie was Lucille’s second husband. He died and left her a fortune. She wanted to pay for your honeymoon as your wedding present and bring us along, too.”
Lucille fidgeted in her seat and said, “We’re going to see if we can get some chapters of the Blue Hat Society started in Hawaii.”
A flight attendant whisked our drinks away and asked everyone to buckle their seatbelts. Another attendant began announcing the pre-flight instructions. Glenn grasped my hand again to hold it. I squeezed his tight. I was so happy and so much in love with him, I felt my heart would burst.
Somewhere over the Pacific, I fell asleep with my head on Glenn’s shoulder. A slight commotion caused me to stir, and I opened one eye. A flight attendant rushed into the galley and returned with Keith’s air freshener. She sprayed a sleeping Lucille.
“Told ya!” Keith yelled from the back.
Mama farted behind us. “Oops,” she said. “Sorry.”
“I got one better than that,” Roger said and let one rip.
I looked up at Glenn. He was laughing so hard, he wiped tears away. He loved my family and thought they were a hoot, but I knew it would be a miracle if we weren’t all thrown off the island in a day or two. The Hawaiians weren’t ready for Mama, her cronies, or her family. I leaned back and smiled while a frazzled attendant sprayed Mama and Roger.
We would see soon enough.
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