Kat needed no one’s help to make the biggest decision of her life. They all tried, of course, except for Hetty, who seemed to believe, since she had delivered her ultimatum, all she must do was to sit back and wait for Kat to arrive in Brightcastle. She was the only one who had not tried to speak with her over the past two days. Her mother, sister, and brother-in-law all cornered her at various times. Esta had a habit of popping up when least expected and found Kat even though she had a young child to keep track of. Kat had taken to mucking out the stable and completing tasks in the most far flung corners of the estate. She bolted her dinner, spent the evenings in her room, then rose early and breakfasted before the others were up. She had become so jumpy she felt like one of her hounds.
Her dreams were full of them as if they had invaded her subconscious. Most of them were nightmares where all her beloved beasts were speared to death by armored soldiers. During the day, she couldn’t stop yawning and snapped at anyone who came near her. She kept drifting off, her thoughts turning to all her encounters with James, especially those where he had pleasured her. She lay in bed before sleep claimed her, touching herself to relieve the desperate desire she had for him. No matter how hard she tried, her body waited for James, and no false loving would do.
After two days, Kat was desperate to take action of any kind to escape. And so she packed her saddle bags and set out for Costa. She would find him and settle this once and for all.
That evening, she arrived at his manor house on dusk. The housekeeper told her James was not at home. Kat was overwhelmed by a desperation she had been fighting all day.
“I must see him, Mistress Lary.”
“Then you must find him, Lady Katrine. But let me tell you this. I care for Master Tomel as if he were my son, and if you will not give him what he needs then get up on your horse and ride back to where you came from.” She closed the door in Kat’s face.
She stood, shocked at those words. How dare his housekeeper take her to task when it was James who had ruined everything? She had been ready to give herself to this man who made her body sing, and he spurned her. Did Mistress Lary know that? Of course not!
Kat turned and mounted Demon, determined to do as James’s housekeeper suggested–ride back home. She let Demon amble back the way they had come and was almost at the town wall when she reined him in. What am I doing? I must see James.
Kat turned Demon and searched Costa, beginning with James’s jewelry shop. She shivered as she recalled her first visit to the shop and their battle with the night hound. Had it all been a test? Had the hounds been waiting for a worthy person to lead them? If so, it appeared she had passed their initiation. The shop was locked up tight. He wasn’t in any of the other shops either.
Next, she patrolled the inns and taverns, gathering more unwelcome interest from patrons as she moved from the more respectable to the seedy end of town. James was not to be found and desperation seized her. Was he even in Costa? His housekeeper would have told her if James was away. Or perhaps not. Had she missed her chance to be with him? A tiny piece of her worried she might never see him again though his actions demonstrated he wanted a life with her.
It was growing dark. Soon it would be dangerous to be out and about. She had no wish to expose her magic or fight for her life. The only lit building near her was the temple. It drew her like a moth to the flame. A prayer to the Goddess would not hurt.
Kat tied Demon around the side of the building out of the wind and paused on the threshold. She took a deep breath and stepped inside. Her whole body trembled, and she drew her cloak around her. She tried to soak in the peace of the sanctuary, but the day had been too long and fraught. A man stood near the front where the candles burned as tribute to the Goddess. He had just placed a lit candle on the shelf. Her foot scraped on the step.
James turned as the sound of a footfall disturbed his prayer. Just his luck that even this small moment of peace should be denied him. A woman stood in the entry, seemingly poised for flight. Their eyes met. Katrine.
He dared not speak or move for fear he might scare her like the wild animal she resembled. Her eyes glittered, swirled, and sparkled. Suddenly, glowing red eyes flanked her.
“Katrine,” he said. “Your hounds.”
She turned and sent the beasts into the night with a wave of her hand.
She turned back to him, and it seemed some of her wildness subsided. She took a step forward, then another.
“I thought I’d never find you,” she said.
His heart leaped for joy. “You were looking for me?”
“I find myself at a crossroads,” she said, her voice guarded. “I needed to speak to you before I could move on.”
Was she here to say goodbye? “I won’t let you leave without a fight.”
Her eyes flared, reflecting the candle light. “You want me still?”
James chanced a step forward. “I thought the ring would have spoken eloquently of my desire to have you in my life. I love you, Katrine.”
He took another step, and she held up her hand to make him stop.
“I am yet to decide,” she said, “but I can’t get you out of my life, out of my head.” “Perhaps there’s a reason. Perhaps we are meant to be together.”
She looked down at her boots, and, when she looked back up at him, her eyes had lost a little of their life. “Once I would have given anything to hear you say those words. I would have given anything to receive your ring and your promises. Indeed, I gave you something precious.”
“I don’t know what came over me that day. I allowed my body to rule, but I can’t regret what happened, not honestly.”
Katrine turned to leave, but he grasped her hand. “Stay and hear me out.” She didn’t turn, so he spoke his words to her profile, the silhouette he loved, the brave, brash, and most alive woman he had ever met.
He took a deep breath, praying he could find the right words. “I regret not saving that moment for this day. Giving in to my desires was wrong. I can never truly make you believe I didn’t intend to use you. But I will try.” He took another long breath, but she still refused to look at him. “I love you, Katrine Aranati. It has taken me months to accept my feelings for you. Now I understand I can’t live without you. I’ve tried and failed. The day in that snowy meadow is one I will never forget. The Goddess knows I tried to put you out of my head and out of my heart. I could not. The intensity of my feelings terrified me. I had tried so hard to control my destiny. I thought I had it all planned out.”
Katrine turned to him and tears shimmered in her blue eyes.
“And then you came along, and my heart took over,” he said. “My body betrayed me, and I acted without regard for you and your reputation. But now I realize I love you, I can’t be sorry I was your first. I’ve lain with no one else since. You ruined me for all other women, and I’m glad. Katrine, you may not need me anymore, there may be many hurdles for us to jump, life may often be difficult. But I can’t live without you. Please put me out of my misery and do me the honor of becoming my wife.”
James dropped to one knee and looked up at the only woman he would ever want, could ever want. Might she put aside the hurt he had delivered her and agree to love him forever?
Katrine grasped both his hands. James closed his eyes to gather courage before fixing his gaze on hers.
“I am not the girl you took in the meadow, James, and I will never be that girl again. Too much has happened–the hounds, my dreams, Hetty—” She swallowed and started again. “Hetty has asked me to move to Brightcastle and take over from her. She is too old to continue her work. I’m considering her request, even though it was more an order.”
“And what is your decision?”
“I’m yet to choose. But back to us. It broke my heart the day I saw your wedding banns posted. You can’t imagine how angry and hurt I was. Not only had you left me, but all the time you were committed to another. I had no concern for my safety and that enabled me to control the hounds because I had lost all fear of them. Losing you was devastating at the time, but now I realize it was all part of my coming into power. No doubt there will be other days when I must rise like a phoenix from the ashes.”
James couldn’t decide where this was going. She sounded so strong, so capable of living without him. Goddess, please let her have mercy on me! She pulled a chain from her bosom and lifted it over her head. Upon it was threaded the ring he had given her. As he watched her remove the ring from the chain, a cold hand gripped his heart. Time slowed as he waited for Katrine to walk out of his life forever.
“Hetty’s ultimatum made me examine what the future might hold for me if I take the path of the sorceress.”
She handed the ring to James, forced him to fold his fingers around it. His world shrank to the cold metal in his palm. He thought he had prepared himself for her rejection, but this moment proved he had not. He couldn’t even look at her as she drew breath to continue.
“I don’t want Hetty’s life. I want to be a wife and mother. I want to dwell in the bosom of my family. And the only man I wish to have by my side is you, James.”
It was only then that he looked into her eyes and what he saw there told him she truly wanted him. He stood and threw his arms around her, crushing her to him.
“Yes, James, I say ‘yes’ to becoming your wife!”
“You are more than I have ever wished for, Katrine. I will love you and treasure you all of our days. You will never be sorry you said ‘yes’.” He reached for her hand, slid the ring onto her finger and covered her hands with his
She stepped back from him. “We still have much to decide. Somehow, we must fit your life with mine, for I won’t give up my magic. I want children, and I want to help my kingdom as well. I’ll track down the dragon and find those responsible for it. And I won’t hide away like Hetty does, a spider spinning her web from the shadows.”
His heart swelled with pride at this fierce woman who had agreed to be his. He pulled her close again, and her arms crept inside his cloak. They stood in the center of the temple, amidst candles signifying tribute and hope, a beacon of light in the darkness.
“I love you, Katrine, and you shall have all you desire and more. Together we will fight the evil in this kingdom. Never fear I will deny you again. I have cast off the fear of old and am ready to adore you for the rest of my life.”
She beamed up at him. “I’ve loved you since the first day when I almost galloped over you, I think. You have set me free of my melancholy and shown me the way forward. I know there will be strife between us, but there is so much love.”
“And desire,” James growled, nibbling his way down her neck until she trembled in his arms.
“I want you, James,” she whispered against his throat.
He kissed her, savoring the sweet softness of her lips and the promise of her ripe body against him. “I vowed I would not take you again until we were married,” he said. “I was here tonight, praying you might find me. I realized the only way for me to have you was for you to come to me. And here you are.” He kissed her again. “We’ll find a priestess and be married this night, and I can spend the rest of my life making up for breaking your heart.”
“You are forgiven, beloved,” Katrine said. “But if we don’t find a priestess soon, I fear I will make you break that vow.”
James laughed and dragged her toward the back of the temple.