YOU WANT TO HEAR something funny? With everything that’s happened now, every TV station in the tri-state area is trying to get their hands on film footage. Any footage: Suzanne walking through the door to the courthouse, Jimmy picking his nose, you name it. And here I am, manager of a two-bit local cable station, with a three-hour-long video special, narrated by none other than Suzanne Maretto herself, and featuring all four of them sitting on a couch and talking heart to heart in the very condo where she evidently took Jimmy Emmet into her bed, the very condo where her husband took his last breath.
I got Russell Hines saying, “Look, if you got a reputation for trouble and everybody out there’s thinking you’re raising hell all the time, anyway, you might as well raise it.” I got Lydia talking about how much it means to her to have a female role model she can emulate. I’ve got footage of Jimmy Emmet, looking straight into the camera, and saying, “People got the wrong idea when they think guys only care about sex, and emotions don’t matter. The person I’m in a relationship with at the moment, it’s not just about getting laid, it’s about love. I’d do anything for this person. And I mean anything.”
Her lawyers put a restraining order on the video. Which is a shame. Not just because it would sure give our ratings a boost. But the fact is, she did a good job with this little project of hers.
We’re not talking Mike Wallace here, I mean, but I probably would’ve put it on the air.
I was actually thinking, before all this happened, that it was about time I gave her a try reading the news. Well you better believe she’s on the news now. She’s a regular goddam celebrity. So I guess you might say her dream came true.