WE WERE GOING TO try again that Thursday night. She had a job interview in the city. She told us the husband would be working over at the restaurant till eight-thirty, nine o’clock. She got all signed up to send the dog to a kennel overnight to have his hair brushed and shit. Lydia gets the gun again. Me and Jimmy, we take out them black suits and gloves. It’s like what they say, dèjá vu all over again.
And this time everything goes smooth. Door’s open. We disconnect the TV and VCR, scatter her jewelry around a little. Open some drawers. Then alls we got to do is stand there waiting for the sound of him pulling his truck in the driveway. After a while we hear it.
You can hear Jimmy breathing deep then and shaking. Me, I could be squirrel hunting. I’m just thinking about the thousand dollars. And how once she’s got her insurance money I’m going to tell her I want five. Which is still a bargain.
Door opens. He sets down his briefcase. “Honey?” he says. Must’ve forgot she was going to be at the meeting. He’s just reaching for the light switch when I grab him around the neck.
“What the hell?” he says. “What—”
“Don’t move,” I say.
“What do you want?” he says. “Why don’t you just take what you want and get out of here?”
This is already more chatter than I was planning on. The guy should of been history by now. Only Jimmy’s froze. He’s just standing there with the gun. Not moving.
“Jimmy,” I say. “Now.” He’s still just standing there.
“Wait—” says the guy. You can tell now he’s had enough time he’s beginning to figure out this ain’t no ordinary burglary. I mean he was scared the minute I grabbed him, but now he’s about to shit in his pants. He’s like some fish flopping around on the pier that’s going to stop breathing in about ten seconds if he don’t get back in the water and he knows it too. He’s desperate. Gives me his gold chain. His watch. But when I tell him to take off his ring he says no. “I can’t do that, man,” he says. “My wife would kill me.” Poor dumb asshole, I’m thinking. If he only knew.
Up to now the guy doesn’t see Jimmy’s face on account of how I’ve got him by the neck. But now he kind of jerks around to where he’s looking right at Jimmy. Which if he ever had a chance of getting off is like, curtains for him. I get the feeling he knows that now too. He’s not even fighting me so much anymore. He’s gone limp all of a sudden. That’s when he turns to me and says, “You know my wife?”
Bam bam. Jimmy does his thing. Hubby there, he flops down on the rug. So much for not getting no blood on her fucking carpet.
We’re out of there.