ENJOY THIS EXCERPT FROM THE FORGOTTEN RECIPE, THE FIRST IN THE AMISH HEIRLOOM SERIES!
Jason Huyard had to be dreaming. The whole scene playing out in front of him was surreal as he stood in the Lapp family’s kitchen doorway and peered into their large family room. People, mostly strangers from other church districts, paraded in and out of the house, seemingly in slow motion. They walked through the family room, shaking hands with other visitors before expressing their condolences to his friend Seth’s mother, Margaret, and his younger sister, Ellie.
Seth’s body lay motionless in the coffin behind his family, and Jason’s stomach twisted and bile rose in his throat as he looked at his best friend.
No, it wasn’t a dream; it was a nightmare, one of the worst nightmares imaginable. It couldn’t be possible that only two days ago he and Seth were talking as they built a shed together for the Lancaster Shed Company. Jason’s world came to a screeching halt when a board broke, causing Seth to fall from the rafters, breaking his neck when he plummeted to the concrete floor.
In an instant, Seth was gone.
If only I hadn’t walked away to grab those bottles of water . . .
Jason tried to push the thought to the back of his mind and moved into the family room to join his family. But he couldn’t take his eyes away from Seth’s mother. She was sobbing in the arms of a woman with graying hair peeking out of her prayer covering. Ellie, standing nearby, wiped tears from her rosy cheeks.
Jason must have told them a dozen times that he longed to go back in time and break Seth’s fall.
It’s my fault Seth is gone and his family is devastated.
Watching them cry was too much for him. The depth of their grief was palpable even from across the large room. Jason’s chest constricted, and he felt as if he couldn’t breathe. The heat in the room closed in on him, stealing the air from his lungs. He had to get out of there before he was sick or passed out.
He turned and weaved through the knot of people on his way back to the kitchen and mudroom, excusing himself whenever he bumped into someone.
“Jay?” his younger brother, Stephen, asked as Jason pushed past him. “Jason. Where are you going?”
“I need some air,” Jason breathed out, pushing on the old, wooden back door, which moaned in protest as it opened.
“Wait,” Stephen called after him.
Jason stepped out onto the wide, covered back porch, and the cool April air hit his face like a wall.
Finally! I can breathe! He moved to the railing and leaned over it. Staring down at the wet grass below, he took long, gasping breaths in an attempt to settle his violent stomach. He was glad no one else was there.
“Jay?” Stephen’s brow furrowed with concern. “You’re as white as a sheet.”
Jason lifted his hat and raked his fingers through his hair. “I’ll be all right. Just give me a minute.”
Stephen pointed toward a group of people talking just inside open barn doors. “I see a couple of guys from work out there. I’m going to talk to them. Do you want to come with me?”
“No, danki.” Jason shook his head. “I’m going to stay here for a few minutes and enjoy the quiet.”
“Okay. I’ll be back in a minute.” Stephen headed down the porch steps and dashed across the yard.
Jason turned and leaned back against the railing, crossing his arms over his chest as the cool wind seeped in through his black jacket. He moved his gaze upward. Puffy gray clouds strangled the sky, and the mist that had threatened all day finally transformed into steady raindrops. The weather was a fitting complement to the hundreds of community members who had journeyed to the Lapp home to say good-bye to Seth.
The back door creaked open, and a choked sob followed. Two women stepped out onto the porch as they supported a third woman, who seemed to be holding on to them with all her strength. They all shared similar facial features and looked to be in their twenties. The woman crying was dressed in black with wisps of blonde hair escaping her prayer covering. Her beautiful face crumpled with anguish and her ice-blue eyes, rimmed with dark circles, were clouded with tears.
The sobs grew louder as her legs seemed to buckled, causing the other two women to grasp her more tightly. Jason started to move across the porch to help them, but they successfully steered her toward a nearby bench and ordered her to sit down. The woman obeyed, and the other two young ladies sat on either side of her, cooing softly while holding her hands.
The door banged open, and a middle-aged couple rushed out and hovered over the three women.
“Veronica?” The older woman addressed the crying woman.
Jason’s eyes widened as he whispered, “Veronica.” Seth’s fiancée! Seth had spoken of her so often that Jason felt as if he knew her.
“Veronica? Please take a deep breath. You need to calm down or you’re going to pass out again.” The woman bent down to meet her eyes. “Do you want to leave?”
Veronica shook her head and dabbed her wet eyes with a tissue. “No, I promised Margaret I would stay.”
“She would understand if you left,” the young woman with light-brown hair said. “You’ve been here all day.”
“Rachel is right,” the one with blonde hair chimed in. “You’ve been here since the crack of dawn, and I heard you pacing last night. You haven’t slept since . . .” Her voice trailed off and she cleared her throat. “Mamm’s right. You’re going to pass out again if you don’t calm down. And you need to sleep.”
“I can’t sleep.” Veronica’s voice was gravelly. “I need to be here. I have to be here for him. I can’t leave him.” Her voice broke, and sobs racked her body anew.
The agony in her eyes fueled his guilt. Why hadn’t he saved Seth? Why wasn’t he there when Seth fell? He could’ve broken his fall or warned him if he’d heard the board start to give way.
Now the blonde was rubbing Veronica’s back. Tears still streamed from Veronica’s eyes, and Jason gripped the railing behind him. He needed to apologize, tell her he was so sorry for her loss. He knew how much Seth loved Veronica. Seth talked about her incessantly. Seth acted as if Veronica was all he ever thought about.
Stephen sidled up to him. “Do you know them?”
“No, but I feel like I do.”
“What do you mean?”
“Stephen, Jason.” Mamm stepped out the door and onto the porch with Dat in tow. “I didn’t realize you were out here.” She turned toward the sound of crying, and a look of compassion crossed her face.
“I needed some air,” Jason said.
“Are you ready to go?” Dat asked.
“Ya,” Stephen said. “Jason looks like he needs to go home and rest.” He patted his brother’s shoulder. “Let’s go.”
His parents walked toward the porch steps, but Jason lingered behind. He turned back to Veronica, who was speaking softly with the women he now assumed were her mother and sisters. He couldn’t stop watching her. He longed to take away her pain. He felt responsible for her suffering.
“Jay?” Stephen asked. “It’s time to go. We’ve been here nearly all afternoon.”
Jason nodded. “I’m coming.”
“No, you’re not, actually. You’re still standing here.” Stephen leaned closer. “Why are you staring at that maedel?”
“She was Seth’s fiancée. They were supposed to be married in the fall.”
“That’s Veronica?” Stephen blew out a breath. “Oh no.”
Veronica’s eyes met Jason’s for a quick moment, and his breath caught. No matter how much he needed to talk to her, he couldn’t do it now, not when her emotions—his emotions—were so raw. He was sure he’d fall apart if he tried to speak. He had to wait until he was strong enough to tell her he felt responsible for Seth’s death, that he would never forgive himself.
“Jason?” Stephen nudged him. “Mamm and Dat are ready.”
He nodded and followed his brother down the squeaky porch steps. When he reached the bottom, he looked over his shoulder one last time and took in the sight of Seth’s beautiful fiancée and her obvious grief. He was going to find a way to talk to her soon, and he would tell her just how sorry he was for not being able to save her future with Seth.
The story continues in
The Forgotten Recipe by Amy Clipston!