29

 

Maxi placed the treasured graduation photo of Jason inside the last box, closed the flaps and sealed it shut. It was a symbolic gesture, she knew, for packing away the past and preparing for the future, but it felt good nonetheless. She laid the roll of tape aside, and straightened to look around her New York apartment. All the furniture was staying, so other than the tiny mountain of boxes in the corner, the place would remain unchanged. She would miss this apartment, with its high ceilings and impossibly large windows overlooking the bustling street below.

She wiped perspiration off her damp forehead and peered down at her old gray sweats. A shower would be the next order of business. She’d been packing since she’d gotten up, and it was well past two o’clock. The image in the hallway mirror as she passed made her wince. Not a spec of makeup and her hair reminded her of a disheveled peacock. If Philippe could see her now, he’d most certainly rescind his offer.

She laughed aloud at the thought and headed through to the galley kitchen to get a drink. Despite the residual ache in her heart over losing Jason, she felt an unusual sense of freedom. It had taken achieving her life-long dream to make her realize it wasn’t what she wanted after all. That and coming to terms with Drew’s death after all these years. She finally understood she’d been running away from her father’s disapproval as well as her own guilt.

Turning down the partnership had lifted a huge weight off her shoulders. She now looked forward to going home for good. Working with Peg at the Cut ’N Curl if she’d have her, and helping more women like Dora Lee at the shelter. That was where she’d found her joy and her true purpose in life. If she were honest, she never really belonged in New York. It would always be a place she loved to visit, but she couldn’t live here. Not anymore.

She opened the fridge, grabbed a bottle of water, and then frowned at the loud knock on her door. She checked her watch. The landlord wasn’t supposed to pick up the key and inspect the apartment until four o’clock. Oh well, he’d have to take her as is, sweat pants and all.

She peered through the little peephole just to make sure. Couldn’t be too careful in the city. She blinked to clear her vision, and her muscles seized up like a victim of paralysis.

Jason?

Her unopened bottle of water slipped through her fingers and bounced off the hardwood floor. All the air seemed to evaporate from her lungs. She jumped away from the door as though Jack the Ripper stood on the other side.

Another knock, louder this time, echoed through the space.

What on earth was he doing here? And why did he have to come when she looked her worst? In a panic, she finger combed her hair and tucked her baggy T-shirt into her pants.

“Maxi. It’s Jason. I need to talk to you.”

The refrigerator motor knocked and sputtered in the kitchen, matching the knocking of her heart in her chest. She wet her dry lips, took a deep breath, and opened the door a crack. “Jason? What are you doing in New York?”

He stood smiling at her in the dim hallway light, his hair windblown over his forehead. The familiar scent of his aftershave, his old battered leather jacket, and worn blue jeans all combined to overwhelm her with longing. He looked so good she wanted to cry.

“I’ve just driven fourteen hours to get here. Can I come in at least?”

Unable to speak, she stood aside to let him in.

He paused for a moment, then strode on through to the living room. His presence filled the space as he stood taking it in. Never did she dream Jason would show up here and be standing larger than life in her apartment.

He let out a low whistle. “Not bad.” Then he noticed the boxes stacked in the corner and turned with a frown. “You moving?”

Shock made her mute. She couldn’t bear to tell him the truth—that she’d given up her job and was coming home to Rainbow Falls with her tail between her legs, her big dreams nothing but an illusion. She ran her tongue over her lips and tried to pull herself together. “Why are you here, Jason? Shouldn’t you be getting ready for your wedding?”

His expression turned serious. “Can we sit down? There are a few things I need to tell you.”

He reached for her hand, but she snatched it away. Instead she crossed the room and perched on the end of the stuffed armchair. Bracing herself for whatever Jason had to say, she folded her arms over her chest like a shield. Most likely he’d come to ease his guilt, to ask for forgiveness or some such thing. She wished he’d just say his piece and leave her alone.

He settled on the edge of the couch nearest her and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees. If she didn’t know better, she’d say he was nervous. The way he clasped and unclasped his hands. The way he kept licking his lips.

Before he could say a word, the question that had been nagging at her burst out. “Why did you buy my parents’ farm?”

He dropped his gaze to the floor for a minute as if contemplating his words. Then he looked into her eyes. “I figured it was the least I owed you.”

Disbelief swirled through her system. “You bought my house because you broke up with me?” As well as she knew him, she didn’t understand his logic there.

He shrugged. “You needed money for your partnership. I needed a home. It occurred to me that all those acres would come in handy and I could offer a portion to the city for a fire station one day. Seemed like a good idea all around.”

The shard of pain in her heart dug deeper. “What about Gloria? I can’t see her wanting to live in my old house.” She still couldn’t bear to imagine Jason living there with that woman and forced the terrible image from her brain.

Jason scrubbed his hand over his face. “Listen, a lot has changed in the past couple of days. That’s what I came to tell you.”

She tried to look away from his earnest eyes, but they drew her in like a magnet. What expression did she see there? Regret, guilt. Could it be hope?

She jumped to her feet and paced to the far side of the room. “Whatever it is, Hanley, just spit it out and go.” She didn’t care if she sounded rude. There was only so much nearness to Jason she could take right now. He needed to leave before she lost every shred of dignity and begged him to stay.

 

****

 

Jason rose from the sofa and let his pride and dignity fall away. He would take Maxi’s rudeness, her disdain. He deserved all that and more. Maxi’s slim back shuddered with pent up emotion, and fear crawled up his spine. How could he make her understand how much she meant to him? How his world wouldn’t be complete without her in it? What if she couldn’t forgive him and wanted no part of him? His hands shook so much he shoved them into his pockets as he closed the gap between them.

“Maxi, look at me, please.”

She finally turned to face him with barely disguised anguish. “What do you want, Jason?”

He waited a beat until she met his gaze. “The baby isn’t mine. It’s Marco’s. So I won’t be marrying Gloria after all.”

Her eyes grew huge and color seeped from her face. She raised one hand to cover her mouth but said nothing.

“I know this doesn’t erase what happened, doesn’t make up for the way I handled things, or my inappropriate relationship that led to this problem. I want you to know how sorry I am—about everything.”

She stood stock-still, shaking her head. What did that mean? Was she refusing his apology? His chest tightened to the point that his breathing became labored.

“If you’re willing to give me another chance, I’d like us to try again. I know how important your career is, and you shouldn’t have to give it up for me. Once I get my firefighter certification, I’ll move to New York. Try to get a job here.” He paused for a breath, pushing back the fear that grew larger by the moment.

Her eyes darted around the room. “I—I don’t know what to say.”

He moved to stand right in front of her and pried one of her hands loose. Her stiff, cold fingers remained unresponsive in his. What was she thinking? For once, he couldn’t read her. Panic fluttered in his stomach. He pulled out his trump card and prayed it would be enough to win her over.

“Maxi, the one thing I’m sure of after this whole fiasco is that I love you, and I don’t want to lose you. No matter what it takes.” Moisture impaired his vision. He didn’t care; nothing mattered but what she would say. “I know it’s a lot to ask, but I hope it’s not too late for a second chance.”

The vulnerability on her pale face made him want to wrap her in his arms and protect her. Make sure nothing ever hurt her again. A huge ball of emotion lodged in his throat, making speech impossible. Instead he reached out and caressed her cheek with his knuckles. Against the roughness of his fingers, her skin felt like velvet.

She closed her eyes and her whole body started to shake. When she covered her face with her hands and began to weep, he didn’t hesitate for a second. He pulled her to his chest and enfolded her slim form against him. “Please don’t cry. You know I can’t take it when you cry.”

His hands moved up and down her back. At last, the warmth of his body seemed to penetrate her stiffness. Her tears subsided. He pulled a tissue out of his pocket and gently wiped her face.

And waited.

 

****

 

Maxi took a cleansing breath deep into her lungs and blew it out. The fog seemed to clear from her brain. Had he really said he loved her?

“You—you’re not marrying her?”

“No, I’m not. Can you ever forgive me for causing you so much pain?”

Hope began as a tiny bud in the pit of her stomach. She wanted to believe him, but she was too scared her lovely dream would burst like an overfilled balloon. As it had so often in the past. “I think so.”

“Are you willing to give us another chance? This time with nothing blocking our way. Not my father, not Drew’s death, not Gloria.”

She took a step away from his intoxicating presence. It sounded like heaven. Her, Jason, and no baggage. She rubbed her hands up and down her arms. “You’d really move here?”

“If you want me to, I will. Whatever will make you happy, I’ll do.” The sincerity in his voice matched his eyes. He was laying himself bare for her. Laying his heart and his life on the line for her.

“I turned down the partnership.” The words erupted out of her.

His mouth fell open as his eyes widened. “But why? That’s all you’ve talked about for years.”

The shock on his face softened her heart. He’d thought of her happiness first.

“It’s not what I wanted after all.”

He took a step closer. “What do you want, Max?” His voice was unbearably gentle. “Whatever it is, I’ll get it for you.”

She moved to the boxes in the corner and straightened the flap on the top carton. “I want a life in Rainbow Falls. Funny, isn’t it? The thing I thought I hated the most is what I really wanted all along.”

A tender expression softened his face. “And what about me?”

She watched the hope bloom in his blue eyes, overshadowed only by fear. With her answer, she held the power to make or break his heart. It was time for the truth at last.

“I love you, too, Jason,” she whispered. “I’d like to start over.”

“Thank You, God.” He sighed and stepped toward her. His hands framed her face as he lowered his lips to hers. She drank him in like a drowning woman. The familiar taste she never thought she’d savor again, the feel of his strong arms holding her, the smell of his leather jacket. Heat swirled up through her system, like steam rising off a lake.

Suddenly he pulled away from her. Dazed, she wondered what was wrong. He bent down, fumbling in his pocket to pull out a tiny blue box.

“I love you and want to share my life with you, Maxi. Will you marry me?”

She couldn’t think, staring at the gleaming diamond encased in velvet. Everything was happening too fast for her to process. “It’s a little soon for this, don’t you think?”

The devastation that spread across his features shamed her. “I mean, we’ve only been on one official date. And you just narrowly escaped another marriage.” A random thought crossed her mind. She pointed at the ring. “This isn’t…”

“Of course not.” He rose stiffly to stand before her. “I couldn’t buy her a ring. Because I want to marry you—in front of God and everyone. It isn’t too fast, Maxi. I’ve known you since the first grade. I’ve loved you almost as long, only it took me a while to realize it.”

She saw how much it had cost him to do this, to lay his heart open before her. Trust her with his soul. Marrying Jason was all she’d ever really wanted as far back as she could remember. Why was she hesitating now?

He pocketed the box. “You’re afraid.” His words came out as a flat statement. “I understand that. I haven’t given you much to go on all these years.” Strong hands reached out to settle warmly on her shoulders. “Whatever way you want to do this, I’m fine with. As long as we’re together.”

She met his warm gaze with her own and lifted her chin. If he could risk everything for her, she could take a step with him. “Don’t put that ring away yet, Hanley. I’ll accept it on one condition.”

A slow grin spread across his face. “Name it.”

“We go on at least ten dates before we get married. To make sure we’re compatible.”

He threw back his head and gave a loud laugh. “That’s the Maxi I know and love. Ten dates it is.”

“And I mean classy dates. Not Ruby’s Diner or—”

He silenced her with a lingering kiss. She melted into his arms, her bones feeling as malleable as clay as all the weeks of tension drained out of her body. She grasped his shoulder to keep from falling while his lips traced a path down her cheek to the soft skin below her ear. She shivered, overcome by delicious sensations rippling through her system.

“We better make those fast dates,” he whispered into her hair, “because I don’t think I want a long engagement.”

She laughed the first real laugh she’d had in weeks. A long beam of sunshine danced across the area rug, illuminating the room. She felt her own smile beam just as bright as she looked up into the eyes she knew so well.

“How about you load those boxes in your truck while I pack the rest of my things? Maybe we can even squeeze in one date tonight.”