MY BODY WAS on a flaming tingle from Tony’s kiss that centered at the base of my belly. And then, it was over. Just like that, he pulled away. Utter shock gleamed in his eyes, like he’d come to his senses. My heart fell and fell until I could have stomped on it with my feet. Or Anthony Mitchell could, because he was actually doing so already.
There you go, Sam. Happy now?
Tony released my hands and raked his fingers through his wet hair, turning toward the forest and then back to me. “Ah, Sam…listen—”
“No,” I cut him off, almost in a panic. “Just—don’t—say anything.” I didn’t want to hear his apologies or excuses for a moment that was so beautiful. It wasn’t his fault alone. I should have known better. After all, it was Lisa he wanted, not me.
Taking a deep breath, I tried to push back my hurt before it overcame me. Then I shrugged and even smiled. “We kissed. It doesn’t have to happen again. It’s all right.”
Tony hesitated. He didn’t show any of my forced nonchalance, but eventually he nodded.
I stepped off the rock, leaving the comfort zone of Tony’s eye level, and walked out into the rain that had lightened to a drizzle in the past couple of minutes. Climbing down the rock face, I looked up at him between watching my steps. “Just don’t go back to being an asshole,” I said with a warning note in my voice.
A sly smile appeared on his face. Finally. “Can I call you Tiny?”
Resisting to flip him the bird, I stuck my tongue out at him instead. “If you want me to kick your shins, go ahead!”
My feet touched the ground, and Tony was down two seconds after me. We walked to his bike, but instead of mounting it, he looked both ways along the path, deliberating. “Are you cold?” he asked me. “If you want, we can go back to Carrie’s house and wait until the rain stops.”
I shrugged. “Yeah, I am. A little. But I’d rather go home now.”
After a curt nod, Tony wheeled his mountain bike in the opposite direction from which we’d come, and when we left the woods and returned to a paved street, he had me sit on his handlebar like before. With the wind and the rain gushing at my face and bare arms, I was freezing. But the cold also numbed my mind, and I was glad I couldn’t start thinking about what had happened back in the forest. Later, when I’d be alone in my room, would be soon enough.
Tony helped me down in front of my aunt’s house and handed me the backpack, but before I could walk inside, he grabbed my hand and held me back. Surprised, I spun around.
For a brief moment, Tony looked strangely forlorn. Then he cleared his throat, tightening his grip around my wrist a little more as if he expected me to wrestle free and run off.
“Look, I know you said it’s cool, but I’m…” He paused and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. You’re a nice girl. And I kinda like hanging out with you.”
I kept my expression blank. “But…”
His answer took a while to come. “But I’m just not doing the girlfriend thing right now.”
“Yeah, I figured that out.” For him, it was either Lisa or nobody. “And I told you, it’s okay. I’m not looking for a boyfriend.” Or so I would tell myself for the rest of the day. And in the end, maybe I’d believe it too.
Giving him a tight little smile, I pulled my hand away from his. “See you tomorrow at lunch?”
“Sure.” He looked away.
I turned and hurried inside, out of the rain and away from the boy who’d broken my heart this afternoon. As soon as the door banged shut, I slumped against it and ugly, fat tears spilled down my cheeks.
“Sam, is that you?” my aunt shouted from the kitchen a couple of seconds before she appeared in the doorway.
It was too late to dry my tears. Pam rushed to me and cupped my face with her warm palms. “Darling, what happened? You’re wet to the bone, and why are you crying?”
“We got caught in the rain,” I choked out, then sank into my aunt’s caring embrace, sobbing into her shoulder. “And he kissed me.”
“Who? Tony?”
Nodding, I looked up. And it was just my luck that Chloe was standing behind Pamela, her face full of horror. She didn’t stay long enough to hear the end of the story, but whirled around and dashed upstairs. A moment later, the thunder of her door slamming echoed through the house.
Pam looked over her shoulder, oblivious to what was going on. Then she held me tighter against her chest and caressed my hair. “If he kissed you, why are you feeling miserable?”
“Because he didn’t want to,” I told her truthfully. “I don’t know why he did it. But he said he didn’t want me to be his girlfriend. He’s still in love with a friend of mine. Has been his entire life.”
“Oh, Sammy. He must feel something for you if he kissed you. Maybe he just needs a little more time to understand what he really wants.” Stroking my bangs out of my face, she gave me an encouraging look. “Who’s the other girl?”
“Lisa Matthews. She’s with Jessie Hunter’s son.”
Realization shone in her eyes. Pam pressed a soft kiss to my brow. “Be patient. He’ll see that you’re everything she is. And more.”
I gave her a tight hug, grateful that she was here for me when I needed her. Her comforting words meant a lot to me. And they actually gave me hope that she might be right. Even if a relationship wasn’t in his plans, Tony wouldn’t have kissed me if he hadn’t felt anything for me.
Soaking in a long, hot bath helped clear my mind of all the shit that was going on inside me. When I came out of the bathroom an hour later, I felt light and refreshingly confident. But most of all I felt cozy and warm in my sweatpants and a dark gray fleece pullover.
I flopped onto my bed with my cell phone in hand and keyed in a message for Susan. It was time to tell somebody about this odd afternoon. I had just sent the text when my glance skated over my backpack, which sat totally forgotten next to my door.
Taking it with me onto the bed, I pulled out my folder to examine my latest work. I still thought it was perfection. When I shoved it back into the folder, I found another drawing inside. Strangely enough, this one wasn’t by me—but of me.
My mouth fell open. In my hands, I held a portrait of me on Jostle, galloping across the paddock. It was done in light lines, just a rough sketch, but the features were accurate, my hair and the stallion’s mane wafted in the wind, and Tony had even caught my joyful laugh. His signature across the bottom right corner brought a smile to my lips.
I was bored.
T.
A whistle from my cell phone told me Susan had read my text and replied. Of course, she was shouting for deets about the kissing. I’d call her in a minute, but first I had to do something else. Tony’s drawing reminded me that he’d said he wanted to email me something. Wondering if there was already an email waiting for me, I booted up my laptop, and opened my inbox.
There were a few spam emails, then one from my mom sending me pictures of our neighbor’s birthday party, and two from friends in Finland that I still wrote to every once in a while. But none from Tony. My heart sank a little then, yet I refused to let this spoil my joy over his picture.
I dialed Susan’s number, then squeezed the cell between my ear and shoulder and typed a reply to my friends while I waited for Susan to pick up.
“Hey! What’s going on?” she screeched in my ear. Startled, I let the cell drop onto the bed.
“A lot. And then nothing,” I told her when I had the phone back in place.
“What do you mean, nothing? You spent the afternoon with Tony. Alone, for heaven’s sake. Tell. Me. All about it!”
I sighed and rolled my eyes, but I also laughed. “He came over, found me practicing in my uncle’s gym, and made me come to his aunt’s. She has horses, and I needed a live model for my AVE project.”
“Wow. He just walked into your house like that? Did Chloe see him?”
Finishing the first email and sending it off, I answered, “Yeah. She wasn’t happy. But I really don’t care. It’s their problem, not mine.”
“So what happened next?” From her excited voice I knew she wanted me to get to the part where Tony kissed me.
“He had me sit on his bike, and we rode to his aunt’s.”
“That worked?”
“Yes. It was scary as heck, but we made it there all right. I worked on that one drawing I needed, and afterwards I got to ride a gorgeous stallion.”
“Tony?” she teased.
“Ha. Ha.” I sent off the second email then closed the lid of my laptop, dedicating my undivided attention to Susan. “But you know what? He drew a picture of me while I was on the horse. I didn’t know about it. Just found it in my folder.”
There was a stunned pause at the other end, then Susan sighed dreamily into the phone. “Aw, this is so romantic. Lisa was right. He must really like you.”
“I thought so when he kissed me in the woods,” I confessed then. “But he broke off the kiss before it got hot, telling me he didn’t want the girlfriend-boyfriend shit.”
“Dang.”
“Yeah. So that’s that. It won’t happen again.”
“Shame…” A smile sneaked into her voice. “But did you like it? How was it? Is he a good kisser?”
“It was…” Amazing, wonderful, breathtaking, sweet, and gut-wrenchingly hot. “…nice.”
“Oh.” Hard to miss her disappointment.
At that moment, my laptop made a low ding sound. I opened it again and found a new email in my inbox. From Tony. My heart zigzagged wildly inside my chest.
“Hey, Susan,” I said, trying to mask my excitement. “Can I call you back later? There’s…another call coming in.”
“Sure.”
I rang off and tossed the phone onto my pillow. This would give Susan time to call Simone and Lisa and spread the news.
Struggling to rein in my quickened breath, I opened Tony’s message.
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 20:59
Subject: helpful material
1 Attachment (1.65 MB)
Hey Sam,
Here’s the material on how to draw bodies.
I hope you didn’t catch a cold in the rain.
T.
Though his message was short, it didn’t escape me that he’d added a personal line. It kept my heartbeat in a fast rhythm.
The attached file contained detailed descriptions with sample pictures for each step. I scrolled through them and couldn’t wait to use this information for my next project. I saved it with my personal files then went to type a reply.
___________________________
From: Samantha Summers
To: Anthony J. Mitchell
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 21:13
Subject: no cold
Thanks for the file. And for saving the drawing(s) today.
Sam
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 21:14
Subject: You’re welcome
You’re welcome.
To say I hadn’t hoped for a longer reply would have been a lie. But what did I expect really? A romantic letter with hundreds of explanations as to why this afternoon had gotten out of control? Well…a girl could dream, right?
I put on some music and read the instructions in Tony’s file carefully, which kept me captivated for over an hour. In the end, I stretched with a wide yawn and closed all the windows I had open on my laptop. The last one was my inbox, and I noticed with surprise that there was another email from Tony. He’d sent it twenty minutes ago, but with my music playing, I hadn’t heard the ding.
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 22:02
Subject: I’m sure even the horse had one…
1 Attachment (1.05 MB)
I thought you might like to have this, too. It’s what I used when I started drawing faces.
You really need to break your obsession with dimples, Bungee. ;-)
T.
What was he playing at? Hinting that I shouldn’t get obsessed with his dimples, because there was no chance for us? This time I didn’t open the attachment but immediately typed a reply. With any luck he was still on his computer and I would get another email tonight.
___________________________
From: Samantha Summers
To: Anthony J. Mitchell
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 22:26
Subject: No. It. Didn’t.
It’s not an obsession, it’s merely a preference. :P
Just like how some guys prefer tall girls to small ones.
Why do you keep calling me Bungee?
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 22:29
Subject: Because I’m not allowed to call you Tiny
I prefer you standing on a rock when I kiss you.
SENT FROM MY iPHONE
My heart lurched to my throat as I read his message several times. It was so…intimate. Biting my bottom lip, I smiled to myself. I never would have dared to believe he’d come up with something this personal. Especially when he kept blocking me from personal stuff.
___________________________
From: Samantha Summers
To: Anthony J. Mitchell
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 22:40
Subject: Did you go to bed? Using your iPhone now?
You didn’t answer my question.
And I could tell you liked me at eye level. So much so that you bit my lip.
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 22:44
Subject: Playing video games with Frederickson
I did answer. See subject of last email.
And I didn’t bite your lip. I nibbled. A little.
You taste good.
SENT FROM MY iPHONE
___________________________
From: Samantha Summers
To: Anthony J. Mitchell
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 22:47
Subject: CAN HE SEE WHAT YOU’RE WRITING??
Why are we talking about kissing now?
That was not a real answer. You dodged the question.
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 22:51
Subject: Unlock your caps
No, he can’t see what I’m writing. Obviously.
We’re talking about kissing now because Frederickson made me talk about it. Apparently, he heard it from Hunter, who got it from Liz.
Did you talk to Susan?
SENT FROM MY iPHONE
Shit. I hadn’t realized the news would make the rounds this quickly. But then, we never said we’d keep it a secret. Was that a problem? Well, it could become one at school. Maybe he didn’t like Lisa knowing that he’d kissed me. If he was still working on a chance to steal her back from Ryan, this information could mean his downfall. Then again, in his email, he didn’t sound angry, exactly. I might be safe.
___________________________
From: Samantha Summers
To: Anthony J. Mitchell
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 23:01
Subject: Yes. Is that a problem?
If so…sorry. But that’s what girls do. They tell each other shit from their life.
Tell Nick I said hi.
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 23:03
Subject: Not for me
SHIT? FROM YOUR LIFE? Are you referring to me kissing you??
Nick just left. He wanted to give us some privacy.
SENT FROM MY iPHONE
___________________________
From: Samantha Summers
To: Anthony J. Mitchell
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 23:04
Subject: Re: Unlock your caps
Do we need privacy?
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 23:08
Subject: It’s a school night
I don’t think we do, but it’s nice to get some anyway.
Shouldn’t little (note I said little and not tiny) girls like you be in bed at this time of the night, Bungee?
SENT FROM MY iPHONE
___________________________
From: Samantha Summers
To: Anthony J. Mitchell
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 23:10
Subject: Your fault
I won’t be able to sleep until you tell me why you call me that.
___________________________
From: Anthony J. Mitchell
To: Samantha Summers
Date: Sun, 11 Nov 2013 23:16
Subject: c u @ lunch
All right. But only because I don’t want to be the reason for your sleepless night.
It’s just a nickname I gave you when I was talking to Hunter the other day. You and the girls were practicing while we were playing soccer. I saw you stretching against a tree.
You’re flexible like a freaking bungee cord…
Now sleep tight, Sammy. ;-)
Here’s a lullaby for you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a30tg02JwDc
SENT FROM MY iPHONE
It took a couple of seconds for the information to sink in, then my heart skipped a beat. He’d watched me cheerleading. He’d talked to Ryan about me. And he’d given me a nickname. All while he was still supposed to hate me. What did that mean?
I clicked the link and couldn’t believe what came up on YouTube. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. “Heigh-Ho.” Laughing out loud, I shut down my laptop and went to sleep.