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CHAPTER 26

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Tessa awoke the next morning feeling groggy and out of sorts. After a restless night due to Jack’s behavior and her own reaction to him, she wanted nothing more than to leave this house as fast as possible. How could he have attempted to kiss her after what he had put her through? The man had no idea of the embarrassment and shame he caused her. The thought of facing him again made her want to burrow herself under the blankets and spend the day in bed.

Perhaps she could avoid him all day. She almost laughed at the insane notion. The morning would be easier to evade him than later when she no choice but to eat dinner with the family. Hopefully, Regina would be satisfied with seeing her great-grandson today so they could continue their journey tomorrow. With that positive thought, she rubbed her eyes and then rang for Marianne to assist her with dressing for the morning.

A few minutes later, Marianne brought up a tray of tea and toast and placed in on Tessa’s lap. “I hope you don’t mind eating in your bedchamber. Most of the family is still abed after such a late night. The servants are all abuzz about the new heir.”

“I much prefer a nice quiet breakfast here,” Tessa responded as her maid set to work pulling out all Tessa’s clothing for the day.

“The servants said today will be very informal until dinner. While they don’t expect Lady Bideford to join them, his lordship requested a celebration dinner. I shall pull out your rose silk for tonight.”

“Very good. Did you pack my riding habit?”

“Of course, ma’am. Do you wish to ride this morning?” Marianne stopped and turned toward her.

“I believe I shall. After so much time in that dratted carriage, I need some exercise.”

Tessa sat back with a slight smile on her lips and spread jam on her toast. If she rode long enough, she might avoid Jack most of the day. This afternoon, she might just need a nap after such a long ride. Then all she had to do was get through dinner. She could do this. How hard could it be to evade one man?

Once dressed, she took one more sip of tea and was ready to face the day. “Marianne, please ask a groom to ready a horse for me to ride.”

“Of course, ma’am.”

Marianne left the room as Tessa decided on a hat to wear with her riding habit. She finally chose the hat that matched the green of her habit and placed it on the bed.

A light rap sounded on her door. “Lady Stanhope, it is Lord Bideford. Are you dressed?”

“Of course.” Tessa opened the door to Jack’s brother. “Is everything all right, my lord?”

“Please call me Bideford. No need to stand on such formalities as ‘my lord’ while you are here.”

Jack’s brother had a bright smile on his face but she couldn’t help but wonder if he had any sleep after the excitement last night. He had dark circles under his twinkling eyes. “Very well, what I can I do for you this morning?”

“My wife would like to meet you. After hearing my grandmother speak of you last evening, she is most curious about you.”

Tessa smiled. The man had a certain charm about him, not unlike his younger brother. “That would be lovely. When?”

“Now, if you can put off your riding for a short time.”

“Yes, of course. But I feel as if I should change.”

“Nonsense,” he said with a wave of his hand. “Georgiana won’t mind at all.”

“Very well, then. Lead on.” Tessa grabbed her hat and then followed Bideford down the corridor. She wondered about Lady Bideford. The woman must be near her age but Tessa could not remember meeting her before.

Tessa glanced at Jack’s door and prayed he was still sleeping so she could slip out after meeting the viscountess. Bideford opened the door to his wife’s bedchamber and Tessa smiled at the scene. Lady Bideford sat back against the headboard with both her daughters cuddled up against her as they all stared at the new heir lying on her lap.

“Come along, Georgie, I do believe it is time for his uncle to hold him.”

Tessa turned at the sound of Jack’s voice from the end of the bed. How had she not noticed him? Dressed in fawn breeches and a brown jacket, he looked as if were also ready for a ride. She hadn’t noticed that his hair had grown slightly longer causing it to curl more. Drat the man, only he could look more handsome with longer hair.

“Lady Stanhope, this is my wife, Georgiana and my son.”

“It is a pleasure to meet you, Lady Bideford, and my joyous congratulations on your new son.”

“It is lovely to meet you finally, Lady Stanhope. I believe we missed each other by a Season. I had already married this scoundrel by the time you came out. Please call me Georgiana.”

Does he have a name yet?” Tessa asked as she stared down at the infant.

“Come along, Georgie. Give up little George,” Jack implored. “After all I am five pounds richer all because of my new nephew.” Jack reached out to take the infant from his mother.

Tessa watched as Jack carefully supported the newborn’s neck and head. He cradled little George in his arms as if he had done this hundreds of times, which he probably had based on his caring nature with the girls. “I take it you named him George?”

“Yes, after my father, not me,” Georgiana said with a laugh. “Lady Stanhope, meet George John Neville Raynerson.”

“John after his favorite uncle,” Jack crooned to the baby who stared up at him.

“John after our father,” Bideford corrected.

“Jack, let Lady Stanhope hold him,” Georgiana said with a smile. “You do want to? I couldn’t help but notice the way you looked at him.”

“Of course, but please call me Tessa.”

Jack brought the infant over to her. Tessa glanced down at the baby and then up at Jack. She couldn’t remember holding an infant other than Emma and that was eighteen years ago.

“It is easier if you sit in the chair and then I can place him in your arms,” Jack said softly. “We wouldn’t wish you to drop the little boy.”

“I would never do such a thing,” she replied but moved to the chair.

Jack placed George in her arms. “Just be certain to support his neck.”

“I will.” Tessa was instantly in love as she stared down at the little boy. She picked up a tiny hand and watched in amazement as he clutched her finger. Tears welled in her eyes as she realized she would never have this in her life. Her heart, which had slowly started to mend from Jack’s betrayal, splintered into a million pieces. As if sensing her heartbreak, little George scrunched up his face and let out a small cry. “Oh, I made him cry. I’m so sorry.”

“He’s just hungry,” Georgiana said with a smile.

Jack reached down to take the boy but paused as he noticed the tears in her eyes. “Are you all right?”

“Please just take him.”

“Of course.” Jack picked up George and handed him off to Georgiana.

“Congratulations again, Lady Bideford.” Tessa scrambled out of the chair and then raced out of the room.

“Tessa, wait.”

She heard Jack’s call but had no intention of talking with him when her emotions were out of control. She ran down the stairs to get away from him and his damned lovely family. Why couldn’t they be miserable? Instead, they all looked so happy while she was miserable knowing she would never be a part of a family like theirs.

“Where are you racing off to, Tessa?” Regina demanded as Tessa strode passed her.

“Riding.”

“Be sure to take a footman with you, then.”

Tessa had no intention of taking a footman or anyone else along with her. She walked outside and realized she had no idea where the stables even were located. With a sigh, she headed for the back of the house and then noticed the stables off in the distance. Once she reached the stables, a stable boy brought out a beautiful chestnut mare.

“Lady Stanhope, this is Fiona. She is gentle but enjoys a good ride.” The boy helped her up on the horse. “I shall be ready in a moment to accompany you.”

“Tessa, do not leave!”

Hearing Jack’s voice, she urged Fiona off. “I shall be fine on my own,” she said to the stable boy. She galloped down the path and moved into the pasture. She prayed she could make it to the tree line in the distance before Jack could saddle his horse and find her. It had been ages since she’d had the chance to ride with abandon. The line of trees came closer with each passing minute. Slowing Fiona down, Tessa glanced back and noticed Jack gaining on her. Drat him, he must have already had his horse saddled.

Entering the dense forest, she had no choice but to stay on the path. The sound of Jack’s galloping horse grew louder until she realized he had already entered the forest but unlike her, he hadn’t slowed his gait.

“Tessa, rein in.”

“No, I am riding and I don’t need an escort.”

“Bloody hell you don’t.”

Before she knew it, he had come alongside her and grabbed the reins from her grip. Fiona stopped and Tessa jumped down eager to get away from the man who had broken her heart.

“Where are you going?” he asked as he jumped off his horse.

“As far away from you as possible,” she retorted and strode toward a break in the trees. A small pasture with a pond opened before her.

“You are on the lands I grew up on. I know them like the back of my hand so it is doubtful that you will be able to evade me.”

Tessa walked to the edge of the pond and sat down. He was right. She would never be able to get away from him while she was at his brother’s home. Pulling her knees up to her chest, her tears finally fell. “Please leave me alone,” she sobbed.

“You know I cannot,” he whispered above her.

She heard the rustle of his clothing as he sank down to the ground beside her. “Why?”

“Why? You are a guest here and don’t know the lands. I have no wish for you to get lost.”

“Would you ask for a carriage to take me home? To London?” she asked softly.

“I thought you wanted to travel to Venice.”

“I just want to be left alone,” she cried.

“No, that is not what you really want, Tessa.”

She lifted her head and glared at him, not caring if he saw the tears streaming down her face. “What do you know about my desires?”

“More than you think,” he answered with a rakish smile. “I saw the look on your face when you held George.”

“It matters not since I shall never have a child and family of my own.” She rose and then looked around. There was no place she could go where he wouldn’t find her. “I shall never be a mother,” she whispered.

“Of course you will.” Jack stood and faced her. He lifted her chin until she had no choice but to look into his eyes. “You will be a loving mother.”

Her tears fell again. “I have been married three times, Jack. None of those marriages produced a child. There were times we were not careful and I never conceived. I must be barren.”

Slowly, he brought his arms around her and held her against his chest. “Your marriages didn’t last long enough to prove anything and there were only two times I wasn’t careful. It took Georgiana five months to get with child the first time. And there are four years between Winnie and George.”

She could hear his heart beating in his strong chest. She shouldn’t allow him to give her comfort but she seemed unable to stop until she remembered all that he had done. Pressing her hands to his chest, she pushed him away. “Do not try to comfort me when you are partly to blame for my heartbreak.”

“Tessa, would you please let me explain?”

“There is nothing to explain. You were doing your job, nothing more. You thought nothing of putting me in Newgate to rot just to get a confession out of the duke.”

“That is not true,” Jack said with a scowl. “I thought long and hard about how to get a confession out of him.”

“And that is supposed to make me feel better?”

“I said it all wrong,” he said, walking away from her. “I never wanted to put you in Newgate. It was the hardest decision I had ever made.” He turned to face her again, agony etched upon his face. “It was torture knowing you were alone in there.”

“Well, thankfully the duke made certain my accommodations were clean and safe.”

Jack’s face turned cold. “How can you still defend the man after what he did?”

“He was a friend.”

“And what was I?” he demanded. “Everything I did was to help you clear your name.”

“Hah! You thought I was guilty! I was nothing but a job to you. Tell me, Jack, how many other women have you bedded for your job?”

“None, Tessa. Only you.” He strode toward the horses. “We are leaving now. I have a carriage to arrange for you.”

“As you wish.”

After helping her on Fiona, they both rode back to the house in an uncomfortable silence. Tessa wondered how he could believe he was in the right on this matter. She obviously had meant nothing to him, and she cursed herself for caring. The carriage ride back to London would give her time to think about what she could do with her life and her money. Perhaps some charity work would do her good.

Arriving back at the stables, a boy helped her down and then she strode for the house, not looking back to see if Jack followed. She asked the butler to have Marianne pack her things.

“Going somewhere?”

Tessa turned to find Regina frowning at her. “I am returning to London. I don’t believe this is the right time for me to travel.”

“Of course it isn’t,” Regina grabbed Tessa’s arm and led her into the small salon. “Are you such a simpleton that you cannot see why I brought you here?”

Tessa anger flared at the older woman. “I know exactly why you brought me here and it did not work. I will never forgive your grandson for what he did to me.”

“Of course you will, my dear.”

“I am done with this conversation.” Tessa turned to leave the room.

“Has the young fool not told you everything yet?”

“There is nothing more to tell. He used me to get to the duke.” She took a step only to feel the older woman grip her upper arm with a strength Tessa hadn’t imagined.

“Did he tell you that he would have been one of the duke’s victim, if not for your maid?” Regina whispered harshly.

No! That could not be true. “We weren’t married so there was no reason to think the duke would have attempted to kill him.”

“Your maid said otherwise. She told Jack that the duke wanted her to give the powder to him but she never did it.”

“Why not? If she had no idea what the powder contained, why wouldn’t she have used it on Jack?”

The older woman laughed. “Anne was told the powder would invigorate a man. She’d overheard you and my grandson in the bedchamber and felt there was no need for that with him.”

Tessa’s cheeks burned with embarrassment.

“And then there was your prison cell,” Regina added.

Prison cell? Tessa slowly faced the older woman again. “I beg your pardon?”

“Your prison cell, with the private guards, soft cot, and tasty meals. Far from the usual fare at Newgate.”

“The duke paid for it all.”

Regina laughed softly. “Oh no, my dear, my grandson spent a fortune trying to keep you safe. Money he could ill afford to spend.”

“Jack paid for all that?” That wasn’t possible. He had caused her to be imprisoned in the first place.

“Nearly indebted himself just for you. I had never seen such a look of self-loathing on any man. He hated what he’d done to you in order to save your reputation.”

Why would he have indebted himself for her? It made no logical sense. He’d never professed love. And he hadn’t admitted that he was investigating her. Could he possibly have fallen in love with her?

“I see you have finally figured this out,” Regina commented with a smile.

“Oh dear God,” Tessa whispered. He loved her. “How could I have been so wrong about him?”