Jen braced herself for Lindsay’s tight hug. As her friend wrapped her arms around her, Jen saw Jason chatting comfortably with her parents and Colby. Jason was getting a lot more trouble than he’d signed up for, that’s for sure.
“I’m so proud of you,” Lindsay said without letting go. Then she pulled back and grabbed her hands. “You’re going on to the semi-final. I knew you would. You’re totally going to win this thing.”
The crowd at the Depot was clearing. Jen waved to Bunny, who gave her a thumbs-up. She’d have to thank Bunny later. Without her tips and tricks, she’d never have pulled it off. “I had no idea the whole town would be here.” Jen shook her hair out of her ponytail, a feeling of exhaustion sweeping over her. “That was intense.”
“You did amazing. And—um. We seriously need to grab some drinks and talk about that man you had at your side. This whole text exchange we’ve had going on about that situation does not do him justice.” Lindsay nodded toward him. “I think he looooooves you.”
“Stop.” Jen couldn’t stop the smile that came to her face. “We’re . . . friends.”
“Friends who can’t keep their hands off each other?” Lindsay looked skeptical. “Whatever you call your little arrangement, you two have some serious chemistry.”
Jen bit her lip. She hadn’t had the chance to update Lindsay on what had happened with Jason the previous night. “Actually”—she lowered her voice—“we slept together.”
Lindsay’s eyes widened, and she smacked Jen on the arm. “See? I told you. When did this happen? How did you not tell me about it! How was it?”
“Last night. And I didn’t have a chance. And amazing.” Jen squeezed her hand. “I promise to send you the full details later. And I don’t know about drinks because my life is completely upside down right now. I’m moving back in with my parents this weekend, so maybe you want to come by?”
Lindsay’s cheerful expression faded. “Oh, honey. I’m so sorry.”
“It’s fine.” Jen didn’t want to think about it. “It’s going to be fine. If I can win this competition, then I can pay off the rent I owe and the preschool and have some left over.”
“You’re going to win for sure.” Lindsay gave her another hug. “Call me later, okay?”
Jen left her by the stage area and made her way over toward Jason. She came up beside him, and Colby turned to her. “You win, Mommy!”
She lifted him into her arms. He was growing so tall it was getting hard to lift him. “Not yet. There’s one more round, and then we have to wait a whole week to find out who won during Mr. Peter’s Christmas special. Then hopefully Mommy can win.”
“Do you two want to go out and celebrate your success?” her father asked Jason. “Betty and I can watch Colby if you do.”
“I don’t have a lot of time before I have to get to the cabins for work.” Jen exchanged a look with Jason. He’d spent his whole evening on her so far. Would he want—
“That would be great,” Jason said, slipping his arm behind her. He did the role of boyfriend well.
Her mom took Colby from her. “I’ll give him a bath.” She kissed her grandson’s sticky cheek. “Candy canes this time of year—they seem to end up on faces more than in stomachs. Oh, don’t forget, Jason. Sunday dinner at five. If you can make it, we’d love to have you.”
After saying their goodbyes, Jen watched them leave, then turned to Jason with a frown. “It’s occurring to me that I need to think of some better way to handle this with Colby. He just saw us kiss up there—and I don’t think he’s ever seen me kiss anyone like that.”
“That makes sense. What do you want to do?”
Despite the dying crowd, it still felt a bit too crowded for this conversation. “Probably no PDA in front of him, but we can talk about it more when we go.”
A sudden pulse of noise and activity drew her attention away. Jason straightened, looking in the hubbub's direction, by the backend of the folding chairs. His face paled. “Oh, shit.” He started toward the small group of people who had made a circle.
Jen followed him. Someone was lying on the floor beside the chairs, but she couldn’t quite see over the people gathered there.
Jason pushed his way through, then bent beside the figure. “Mildred. Mildred, can you hear me?”
Jen got past a few people, then got close enough to see. She froze. Millie Price lay there. “Oh my God!” Jen dug through. “Millie!” Was she okay? Kevin’s grandmother had always been an enormous source of support for her and Colby . . .
She paused, staring at Jason. Millie had opened her eyes now and lifted her hand to pat Jason’s cheek with familiarity and tenderness that stole her breath.
She lifted a shaking hand to her forehead, then squatted a few feet from them. Her chest felt as though someone had tied a belt around it, pulling it tighter and tighter.
How had Jason known Millie’s name?
Dan was there now, but her head buzzed with such ferocity that she could hardly absorb the scene in front of her. She’d seen her brother in the crowd, but he’d seemed to come out of nowhere. “We’ve called an ambulance, Millie, okay?”
Millie sat up, shaking her head. She touched her forehead. “I don’t know what happened. Everything just felt dizzy.” She gave a sharp look at Jason, holding his hand with a tight grip. “I’m much better now.”
“I think we should still have you checked out at the hospital,” Jason told her. His face was flushed, and he didn’t look at Jen.
“No, no, I’m fine.” She let go of Jason’s hand and held her hands out to Dan. “I’m sure Sergeant Klein can see me back to my house.”
Dan leveled his gaze with her as he helped her stand. “Millie, you’re going to the hospital.”
“We can talk about it.” She smoothed out her dress. “See? Perfectly fine.”
Dan didn’t release her arm. “Let’s go sit in a chair, okay?”
As they moved over to a nearby folding chair, the small crowd that had gathered around Millie wandered off, satisfied.
Jen didn’t move from where she’d squatted on the floor. Neither did Jason.
She closed her eyes. He obviously had met Millie—but no one in town called her Mildred. She was Millie Price, and her name carried with it the weight of her antics and personality.
Which meant he already knew her.
He’d come to Brandywood for “family business.”
She felt sick.
Opening her eyes, she cleared the knot from her throat. “You’re Millie’s—”
“I’m her grandson.”
Jason still didn’t look at her. His shoulders fell, and he rubbed his fingers over his jaw. At last, he lifted his eyes, his gaze apologetic.
The impact of his words was like a bludgeon to the head. She felt so dazed she couldn’t think straight. Millie’s grandson. She stood shakily and whirled around. Dan was still a few feet from her, watching her. He gave her a comforting look. “Just stay here,” he mouthed.
Had he heard Jason? If so, Dan was smart enough to put it together. Who knew—by now, he might know something else about Jason. His gaze told her he knew something.
But she didn’t listen, feeling so nauseated that she couldn’t stand still. She bolted from the Depot, not waiting for Jason.
Jason followed her outside. “Jen.” He was only steps behind her, and the sidewalks of Main were a bright blur of Christmas lights through her tears.
When he caught up with her, he grabbed her elbow. “Wait up.”
She whirled to face him. “Who are you?” Her words were a demand, not a question.
Jason dropped his hand. “Jason Cavanaugh.”
Liar. “Not Sutter?”
He shook his head. Then he took a step toward her and added, his voice low, “I’m Kevin’s brother.”
His words were like a death knell. She already knew. Millie only had one daughter. But Jen had also never spoken Kevin’s name to Jason.
Kevin’s brother.
Oh my God.
She covered her mouth.
Jason held her shoulders. “I didn’t know how to tell you and—”
“Don’t you dare give me excuses.” She wrested herself away. “You lied to me.”
He rubbed his eyes and nodded. “Yes, I lied. But I—”
“Kevin’s last name is Connor.” Had everything he’d told her been a lie?
Jason stared at the thick covering of clouds in the sky. “Cavanaugh, actually. Like mine. It was a stupid lie.”
What? Why had Kevin lied to her about his last name? Had Millie known? She looked back toward the door of the Depot. She didn’t know that she’d ever discussed Kevin’s name with Millie, actually. The only time that might have qualified was when Millie came to see her and Colby at the hospital after he’d been born.
“What’d you name him?” Mildred asked, peering down at the little bundle in Jen’s arms.
“Colby. Klein. Like me.”
“Good.”
And that was it. Neither of them had gone into the specifics of Kevin’s last name. Neither of them had a reason to. Jen closed her eyes, unable to look at Jason.
Kevin had never mentioned having a brother, had he?
Maybe he had. She could hardly remember anymore. Aware of the number of people still on the street, she spun and started her flight again.
Tears stung her eyes as she thought of all her conversations with him. The ample opportunities he’d had to tell her the truth. She put a hand to her throat. She’d had sex with him, for God’s sake. More than once.
Colby was his nephew. Same color eyes.
Who was Jason? Why was he in Brandywood? He’d been lying about so much. Was Kevin using him to spy on her? Maybe he finally had decided to make a bid for custody. The thought made her tremble.
As Jason fell into step beside her, words spilled from her chest as she walked. “I don’t leave Colby by himself in the guest lodge too often, you know. Almost never. And I rarely date. And no, I haven’t slept with anyone else since Kevin. I don’t make a habit of that. And . . . and the preschool stuff? We’re working through it. I have him talking to a therapist, and as soon as I find another childcare option, we’ll be totally fine financially. December has a lot of overtime opportunities for me. The eviction . . .”
Oh, God.
She’d given Jason every tool to destroy her with.
“I’m not—” Jason’s eyes moved to her hands. “You’re shaking.”
Jen swiped her tears away and stopped by the small park on Main—really just a few benches and streetlamps and trees. In the back, a small bridge overlooked the river that flowed alongside the city.
She gave Jason a pleading look. “I love Colby. More than life itself. And I don’t mind Kevin wanting to be a part of his life if he wants. God knows I dreamed about it for . . . well, years, actually. Colby deserves a dad. But”—her face grew more serious, less vulnerable—“he can’t seriously think he can waltz in here. I don’t have time for games anymore, and neither does Colby. I refuse to even entertain the idea of introducing them if there’s a chance he’ll disappear again.”
Jason was silent. The silence was thick and uncomfortable, and she wanted Jason to say something.
Anything.
At last, Jason lifted his blue eyes to her. Eyes that were just like Kevin’s. Just like Colby’s.
No wonder she’d thought they looked like father and son. Stupid, stupid.
How could she have missed something so monumental?
“Jen, I don’t know how to tell you this, but . . . Kevin’s dead.”
She gripped his forearm to steady herself, gasping. Dead?
It’d been almost four years since she last saw Kevin. And she’d spent most of the time hating him. But she’d never thought he was dead. Not really. She choked back another cry, then wiped her eyes, leaving a streak of mascara across her fingers. “How?”
He unbuttoned the top button of his coat as though he felt hot, despite the frigid December temperatures. “To be honest, I don’t really know much about it. He left home over seven years ago. Barely came back while he was in college and just vanished after a while. Then I got the call one day to come down to the hospital and identify a man in the morgue. It was him.”
She fought for composure, then found a nearby bench to sit. “What did he die of?”
Jason didn’t sit beside her, his posture rigid. “An overdose.”
Oh, Kevin.
His demons had come back to haunt him, after all. She shuddered, the cold permeating her uneven breaths and invading every inch of her skin. She almost didn’t want to ask her next question, but it burned in her throat. “When?”
Jason looked back toward a group of passersby on the sidewalk. He waited until they’d moved farther away, then stepped closer. “About three and a half years ago.”
She hugged her legs to her chest, setting her face on the tops of her knees. Before Colby was even born. He hadn’t even made it to his son’s birth.
This whole time, she’d been furious with a man who was dead.
He would never come back. Was never going to be a part of his son’s life.
She’d mourned Kevin years before when he’d left. But this . . .
A crushing pain gripped her heart. She’d loved him so much. She didn’t stop the tears. Her shoulders shuddered with broken sobs.
The bench creaked as Jason sat beside her. She didn’t fight him as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. Much as she was angry with Jason, her head was spinning from all the shocks to her system at once. Her feet slid off the bench, and she buried her face against his coat, breathing in his scent, which had felt so familiar and comforting just minutes before.
She’d tried to do her best to learn more about him, and he’d hidden the most important thing she needed to know. Jen clenched her jaw. Jason had slept with her knowing all this about her, while she knew nothing.
Her hurt was difficult to process, to understand. A gust of icy wind sent the bare branches of the trees scraping against the stone of the buildings beside them. The air dried the icy trails of tears on her cheeks. The desire to know more about what had happened to Kevin consumed every other emotion.
“I was afraid—” Her voice filled with tears. “I was afraid that he’d gone back to using.” She sniffled, wiping her nose with her sleeve. “He just seemed so different from any of the guys I knew around here. Didn’t know a thing about fixing cars.” She chuckled softly. “But we could go to museums and get lost in them for hours. He was the only person I’d ever met who would stop at the historic signs—you know, the ones on the side of the road that tell you about the important stuff that’s happened there?”
“Did he ever talk about his family?” Jason leaned back against the back of the bench, his arm still around her.
“Not really.” Jen cleared her throat. “He would just get really sad and close up entirely when I asked about it. He said something about his dad drowning, though.” She winced, immediately remembering Jason’s dislike of water. No wonder. “I mean, your dad. Sorry, I probably shouldn’t bring it up.”
Jason looked away as though willing himself not to think about it. He got to his feet. “Yeah. That was a long time ago.” He held out his hand to her. “I know you probably don’t want to be around me, but if you’d like to talk . . . can we continue it inside somewhere? You’re shivering.” Then he added with a pleading expression, “Please.”
She stared at his hand, her anger at him flowing back to him now that the shock about Kevin had ebbed. She shouldn’t have let him comfort her. Not after the way he’d lied to her. “Did you know who I was when you met me?”
“Yes.” Jason put his hands in his pockets.
The succinctness of his response felt honest but only made her eyes narrow as she remembered her fears about stalking her. “Then you actually were following me?”
“No.” Jason drew a sharp breath through his nose as though affected by the cold. “I just kept running into you. I didn’t come into Brandywood to meet you. I only found out about you and Colby the day before I came into town, and my goal was to talk to Mildred.”
She stood and lifted her chin. “And somehow, instead, you conveniently found and flirted with me—and then fucked me? Even though you knew I didn’t know Kevin was dead. Even though you were basically lying to me about who you were.”
“Jen . . .” Jason took her hand, but she yanked herself free from his grip.
“Don’t you dare touch me.” Jen glared at him. “The thing is, this whole time I’ve been questioning myself since I met you. But maybe being cautious and waiting for someone who actually deserves my limited time wasn’t the world’s worst plan.” She backed away, ready to flee. Her teeth chattered, almost more from emotion than from cold. “Do me a favor, will you? Stay away from Colby and me.”