Gabriella
It’s not legal, so it isn’t real. Just say I do and be done with it.
We’re on the beach, and about twenty of Triker’s top gang members are in attendance.
I’m wearing a white bridal sundress, and Triker just said, “I do.”
The words coming out of the woman’s mouth are jumbled. She stops talking and is waiting for me to answer.
“Gabriella,” Sid quietly says.
I put my hand on his cheek for the crowd of observers and his benefit as well. “I do.”
He grins at me.
God, I hate you.
All I’ve thought about all day when the makeup and hair ladies were fussing over me was Javier.
I should have had my wedding and be married to him.
Instead, I’m having a wedding with Sid Triker, so the Twisted Hearts can believe he won me over even though he issued a declaration to get me.
“We can’t get legally married because I’m wanted by the FBI and won’t get a license.”
“I understand.” Relief washed over me.
“So, we’ll have the ceremony and deal with the legal part down the road, but everyone will know you are mine.”
My gut dropped, and, two days later, it was our wedding day.
And tonight I have to give myself to him.
There is no window left. I’ve pushed Triker off as long as I can. I’ve been on the pill for several weeks. He kept his word and got an STD test and gave me the results without even opening it. He’s resumed sleeping in the bed next to me, except now, instead of just holding me, he kisses me good night and good morning.
As much as I hate him, I loathe myself.
When he kisses me, my loins burn. Javier was the only man who ever made my loins burn, but now, Triker does. It’s not the same as when Javier set my soul on fire. There’s no love, or intimacy, or respect.
At least not on my part.
But when he touches me, I want more.
And I detest myself for it.
So far, I haven’t let him take it further. But every kiss we have lasts longer. His rock-hard body presses against me, and his erection grows against my flesh.
The way he caresses my hip, or back, or a few times my ass, send shivers down my spine. He knows about those shivers, and he knows I’m having a harder time resisting him.
Since our conversation on the beach, he’s given me more freedom. I’m allowed to walk the beach without him during the day or go in the water. Sometimes I’m with Lena. At other times I’m alone. I’m not naive—I know his men follow me, but they stay far behind, and it’s Sid’s way of showing me he trusts me.
“You may kiss your bride,” the woman says, and I snap back into reality.
Sid steps up and kisses me, and I tell myself I’m kissing him back at the depth I am for the benefit of the guests, but my toes curl, and I want it to continue.
You’re a horrible, horrible person, Gabriella.
It’s one thing to do it. It’s another to like it.
God, I hate him.
No, you don’t, and that’s the problem.
We’ve gone out several times, and while I’ve put on a show for the Twisted Hearts, I’ve caught myself genuinely having fun with Sid. When he puts his arm around my shoulders or his hand around my waist to guide me into a room, I lean into him without having to think about it.
“Marry me, Gabriella,” he said to me a few days ago. We had just woken up, and he kissed me good morning. “Not because it’s expected for me to marry my First Lady but because you want to.”
I froze, and he pulled out the biggest ring I have ever seen then slid it on my finger.
The ring feels heavy and like a noose around my neck. Nothing like how I felt when I wore the ring Javier gave me.
“I know you don’t love me. I still hope you can someday. But I love you. When you marry me, I want to know you want to. That in this situation you’re in, you choose me.”
If I had any choice in the matter, I wouldn’t marry you. But since I have to, and your mood is better when I tell you what you want to hear, sure.
“I choose you,” I told him.
The night before he proposed to me, I told him what he didn’t want to hear regarding our relationship, and three of his men left dinner with black eyes. Sid accused them of messing something up I didn’t understand, but they stood ten feet from the table and didn’t move while Sid slammed his fist in each of their faces several times apiece.
That night, I went to bed, still rattled by watching the violence. He came to bed and pulled me into his arms. White gauze with blood seeping through it was over his hand. When I trembled from fear, he murmured, “I’m sorry you had to see that. Don’t be scared of me. I’ll never hurt you.”
I didn’t turn into him when he tried to kiss me good night. I was still shaking, and I think he knew he had done enough damage to the progress we had made. The next morning came the wedding proposal.
Sid pulls back from our kiss and wraps his arm around me and throws his other hand in the air as the crowd cheers.
I put the happiest expression on my face I can and pretend to be the bride Sid wants. He quickly escorts me into the house and to our room.
My stomach flips. I’m not ready for this.
He shuts the door, and his lips crash into mine. The flutter in my stomach that I try to oppress whenever he kisses me is running on all cylinders, and I swirl my tongue in his mouth.
“Sid,” I murmur between kisses.
“Yeah.”
“I don’t want to do this.”
He stops and pulls back. Anger flares in his face. I put my finger on his lips. “Not right now with our guests downstairs. I want it to be at night.”
His face calms, and he puts his arm around my waist. “Why night?”
Think, Gabriella.
“I...I...” I blow out a big breath of air.
He cups my face. “Tell me.”
Think.
“I don’t want to have to leave after our first time. I want to spend all night with you and not worry about people. I want it to be dark with candles and things. And I have an outfit for you...” I blurt out, making it up as I talk.
You just told him you want to fuck him all night long. Way to go, Gabriella.
A new heat enters his eyes. He kisses me, and I kiss him back. “Is that what you want?”
You said it. No getting out now.
“Yes.”
“Okay. I can wait a few more hours, then.”
A combination of relief and butterflies and dread fill my stomach.
“Thank you. Let’s go entertain our guests.”
He pulls me into him. “You’re already a great First Lady, but I knew you would be.”
I cringe inside at the realization of who I now am, and we go back downstairs. Throughout the party, people clink their silverware to their glasses, and Sid and I have to kiss. With every kiss, my loins burn hotter for him, and the intensity of his kisses grow.
By the time night comes, my lower body is wet and throbbing. I’ve also had a glass of champagne and am feeling a buzz. I go to have another drink, and Sid grabs it from me.
“Hey! That’s mine.”
“I don’t want you sick tomorrow.”
The previous weekend we were at a party, and I had a few drinks and paid for it the next day. I ended up telling Sid that I don’t drink and shouldn’t.
He’s right. You’ll be sick.
Yeah, but you’re going to be fucking him in a little bit. Maybe you should drink and get sick so you don’t have to.
It’s your wedding night. There’s no more getting out of this. You have to perform.
Fake wedding night.
“Thank you. You’re right.”
He stands behind me and clutches my body to his. Leaning into my ear, he murmurs, “I’m ready to go to our room and not come out until tomorrow morning. What about you?” His erection digs into my back, and his warm breath sends tingles over my neck.
There is no getting out of this.
“Yes.”
He guides me around the room, and we say good night to several influential people in the Twisted Hearts gang.
Flutters of anticipation and guilt consume me as I make my way up the stairs. When we get to the door, he picks me up in his arms and gives me another toe-curling kiss.
“I’ve waited for you. I want tonight to be special, too.” His smoldering expression creates further anxiety. But when the door opens, the room has been transformed.
Candles burn everywhere. Soft music plays. Rose petals are strewn all over the bed and floor.
He locks the door behind us.
“Wow,” I whisper, taken aback by the grand gesture as my butterflies go crazy. I curse myself for appreciating what he has done to the room. Disgust at myself hits a new level.
You aren’t supposed to like this. Fuck him and go to sleep.
He sets me down. “Gabriella.”
I turn into him.
“I do love you.”
The combination of too many emotions throughout the day, and the confusion I feel about him, mix with all my guilt, along with the glass of champagne, and I’m left vulnerable. “I know you do.”
I don’t doubt it. Sid Triker is evil. He’s a murderer and a violent person. But I know in his warped way, he loves me.
“I’m sorry I didn’t do things the right way with you.”
I blink back tears, not sure what to say or how to respond.
“I’ll always protect you. If I have to, I’ll die doing it. I want you to know that.”
I put my hand on his cheek and whisper, “I know.”
“Do you want me?” His eyes flicker from the light of the candles. The desire that he always has for me is in them, but tonight I see something new. Fear. He isn’t sure I will tell him what he wants to hear.
Play your part, Gabriella.
I stroke his cheek.
“I need to hear you say it, Gabriella. To know that you’re giving yourself to me because you want to, not because you think you have to.”
I don’t move, and my heart races.
Tell him you don’t want him.
Play your part.
He’s a monster. You’re only here because he kidnapped you and held you hostage then forced you to marry him in exchange for not killing everyone you love.
He steps closer to me and swallows hard. “If you don’t want me, I’ll leave. You don’t have to do this.”
Tell him you don’t want him.
He’ll go crazy.
“Want do you want, Gabriella?”
“I want you,” comes flying out of my mouth.
Relief crosses his face. “Good.” He kisses me, and unzips my dress, pushes it to the floor, then pulls back to assess me.
I’m wearing a white lace, barely-there bra and pantie set that Lena gifted me.
“I’ve never seen anyone as beautiful as you,” he tells me, pulls his shirt off his torso, releases his pants, displaying his body full of muscle then steps forward and consumes me in a panty melting kiss.
He picks me up and lays me on the bed, kissing my neck and removing my bra before dipping down and sucking hard on my nipples.
“Oh fuck,” I cry out, not used to the quick roughness.
He yanks my panties off me and begins marking my stomach.
A strange surge of pleasure and pain moves wherever his mouth goes.
“Sid,” I cry out and dig my nails into the skin on his head.
He moves to my pussy and begins eating me out with ferocity, making me peak almost instantly.
“Oh God...oh...oh,” I yell out, shaking in a hard orgasm.
Before I know what’s happening, he’s sliding his girth into me, and I clutch him around his shoulders, trying to accept him, but he doesn’t give me any time and thrusts.
“Oh God...slow down...please slow down!” I cry out to him.
He slows. “This better?”
“Hmmm.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I just...I want to feel you...let me just feel you for a minute.”
He slows further. “Okay. Like this?”
“Yeah.” I rock into him.
“Fuck. Do more of that.”
I rock a bit faster.
His flesh singes mine, breaking out into pellets of sweat.
I push him deeper in me, thrust in synch with him, as tingling sensations overpower my every nerve.
He sucks on my neck hard, and I cry out.
“I’m marking you as mine,” he bellows.
“I am yours,” I blurt out.
His lips consume mine, and his tongue plunges deep in my mouth.
I whimper, hating myself for not being able to stay quiet. Every pleasurable sensation I have is present. My skin hums under his, vibrating and pulsing.
He thrusts faster and harder, grunting, with every pound in me.
“Oh God,” I cry out, on the edge of climaxing.
“Come on,” he growls at me.
“I...oh...I...oh...”
“Fuck me, Gabriella,” he barks out.
I move my hips faster, matching his increased speed, panting, trying to find air.
He grips my hair and pulls it back, so my neck is taut, and he marks me again.
“Sid...don’t...oh...yes...yes,” I scream, and every cell in my body erupts into my high.
“Keep fucking me,” he yells, and I thrust with him until he pulses and pumps his seed in me.
He collapses on me, burying his face in the pillow next to my head.
The weight of his body crushes me for a moment. He rolls over, and we both try to find our breath.
I blink hard, focusing on the ceiling, feeling guilty, and missing everything about Javier, including how we had sex.
And I know I’ve now done the unforgivable. If Javier ever did rescue me, there’s no way he’ll ever be able to still love me knowing I fucked Triker.
My thoughts are interrupted when Triker turns my chin toward him.
I arch an eyebrow at him. “Hmmm?”
“Give me fifteen minutes, and then I want you on top.”