Classic wedding invitations are engraved, very formal, and printed in a fancy cursive font that resembles calligraphy. As you will see below, there are fewer rules for invitations today, and they can be much less formal.
Invitations can be printed on scrolls or hand-painted on cards.
Some couples opt for pretty handmade papers such as those containing pressed or dried flowers.
You can make your own invitations, but be sure to factor in the cost of your time and what it is worth to you. More potential headaches and unforeseen costs can be associated with making your own than with the more conservative store-bought route. Be sure you are prepared for the extra work and time commitment involved.
Some couples design homemade invitations with photos of themselves scanned in or printed on the invitations.
One bride chose to literally make her own paper. She used construction paper, a blender, water, and flower petals. (Consult a craft store or a book on papermaking for more details!) Then she used tracing paper as the overlay with the invitation printed on it, and attached the pages together with ribbon. The invitations were a fraction of the cost of store-bought ones and had her handmade personal touch on each.
The wording of invitations has become less formal due to many factors, including the increasing number of weddings involving blended families, the greater frequency of weddings paid for mostly or entirely by the bride and groom, and the high divorce rate. Consult stationery stores, the Internet, and etiquette or wedding books to get ideas on how today’s couples are choosing to word their invitations.
Be sure to include information about your wedding dress code, if there is one. No one wants to arrive at a black-tie wedding in a suit or sport jacket.
There are many lower-budget printing services that will print your invitations for much less than a stationery or wedding store would charge. Bridal magazines also have special reduced rates for subscribers.
Order wedding announcements and thank you cards simultaneously to coordinate with your invitations.
Nowadays, some couples even e-mail or fax their invitations. Casual can be chic! Be sure this choice fits your style, though. It may offend some more traditionally minded recipients.
Envelopes can be hand-addressed if you have the time. This is typically more personal than affixing labels to each invitation.
You can have your computer print your guests’ addresses and your return address on the envelopes, but note that this can be incredibly time-consuming if you need to hand-feed the envelopes one by one.
Use “Love” stamps or other pretty floral stamps on your invitations and reply cards for a romantic touch.
Bring your invitations to the post office and take the time to hand-cancel the stamps on each instead of having the postal meter run a black line across the bottom of your invitations. It looks classier. Realize, however, that even if you have your envelopes hand-canceled, sometimes they still get double-canceled by the postal machines. Unfortunately, there is no way to prevent this.
Some couples choose to use sealing wax on the back of the envelopes for a classy effect. Be aware, though, that these seals can crack or chip during handling by the postal service. Seals can also lead to delays in guests receiving their invitations because they can cause postal machines to jam and even tear your envelopes because of the uneven lumps that these waxes make.
To avoid these problems, some couples use sealing wax on the inner envelopes of their invitations instead of the exposed outer envelope. (Don’t use candle wax; it is too brittle and will crumble.) Be sure anything with wax seals (inside or out) is hand-canceled at the post office.
When compiling your guest list, decide whether you will include only the spouses of your guests, or whether you would like to invite fiancés and significant others as well.
If you address an invitation with the words “and guest,” you should assume that the invitee will bring one. Factor this into the number of guests your budget, location, and caterer can accommodate, and decide as a couple what you would like to do.
You can always leave out the words “and guest” initially, then call your single guests closer to the actual wedding, once you have a firmer idea of how many people will be attending, and offer them the option to bring a date if they would like.
Send out your invitations six to eight weeks in advance. That way you’ll have plenty of time for slower RSVPs as well as time to move to your “B” list if your numbers are coming in lower than expected.
Any international guests or those traveling great distances to attend should receive their invitations or, at minimum, information regarding the wedding, ten to twelve weeks in advance as a courtesy to assist them in travel planning.
Include a “reply by” date on your reply card to encourage guests to RSVP in a timely manner.
Prestamp your reply card as a courtesy to invitees.
Check with your caterer as to the absolute final date you can let him or her know your total number of guests. As this date approaches, if you have not heard from certain guests, you and the groom should call them to find out if they are planning to attend.
Frame, matte, or etch your invitation on a silver serving tray, glass plate, or Lucite block to serve as a beautiful reminder of your special day.