Helen perched on the edge of her bed and wished she had more of the ibuprofen Cecelia had given her. Eli had brought over a buggy and driven her home from Moses’s house, but her trek across the field left a pulsing pain in her hip the rest of the afternoon and into the evening.
“So, the girl will be okay?” Isaac lifted himself to a sitting position and yawned.
Helen twisted to face him as she took off her kapp and began removing the pins in her hair. “Ya. The paramedics said she has a lot of bruising, a busted lip, and a sprained ankle. It’s nothing short of a miracle that she wasn’t hurt worse.” She began to run a brush through her hair. “But we have lost Lucas to the Englisch world.” Her voice cracked as she forced herself to say the words aloud.
Isaac groaned as he shook his head. “Ach, Helen, you can’t be sure of that.”
“Ya, I can.” She placed her brush back in the drawer and crawled beneath the covers. “You arrived not long after I did, and you saw the way they were together. I’m sure the child was in shock, but she stayed curled up in Lucas’s lap. She wouldn’t even have anything to do with her mother. Lucas told her over and over again how much he loved her, right in front of Cecelia and me. And that girl clung to him, trembling. I felt sorry for her, but I felt even more despair knowing Lucas will be stepping off the path Gott chose for him.”
Isaac was quiet for a while before he gently nudged her, and in the dim light from the lantern, she saw the corners of her husband’s mouth crinkle as he grinned. “Had you ever shot the tranquilizer gun before?”
Helen snuggled up against him until she found a position with the least amount of pressure on her hip. “Nee. But I’d seen you and the boys use it, and it was in the barn. I knew I could get there the fastest even though my hip slowed me down.” She laughed a little. “After I took the shot and the horse fell, I couldn’t move for a while. I just stood there in the field shaking all over, thinking how I could have hit Lucas, the girl, or her mother.” She paused. “If it had to be someone, I’d have chosen the mother, I think.”
Isaac chuckled. “She would have been sore and had a nasty headache when she woke up, but she would have been all right.”
“Cecelia demanded to ride in the ambulance with her daughter, but Natalie wanted Lucas to go instead. She pleaded with the paramedics to allow him to do so. Cecelia actually stomped her foot and yelled at Lucas to move, telling the paramedics that she was family.” Helen shook her head. “Lucas said, ‘I’m her family too,’ so firmly that Cecelia shut up, and the paramedics agreed to let him go because Natalie’s blood pressure was rising. His love and need to protect that girl is strong.”
“Then we can’t fight it, Helen. Lucas isn’t baptized. He won’t be shunned from the community, so we will still see him.” Her husband eased an arm around her and pulled her closer. “What did Moses say when he got home and saw his horse laid over?”
“He didn’t see a thing. Cecelia followed the ambulance in her car, and I offered to wait at Moses’s haus until he got home so he wouldn’t think someone killed the horse or call a vet or Big Rudy. I waited two hours, and Moses still wasn’t home. The horse was back on its feet, so I filled a bucket with oats and left it some water.”
“I guess Cecelia will give Lucas a ride home?” Isaac reached for a tissue by the bed and blew his nose.
“Ya, I guess. I didn’t hear which hospital they were taking Natalie to. Probably the one in Bedford, so Lucas might call a driver.” She looked at Isaac and lifted his chin closer to the flickering light. “You’ve got some color back in your face. Are you feeling better?”
He coughed a little. “Ya, I just needed a little rest to fight off whatever bug I picked up. Eli and Jacob said this afternoon that they’re feeling better too.”
“That’s gut.” Helen kissed Isaac on the cheek. “I think I need a warm glass of milk and a sugar cookie. I’ll try to be quiet when I come back to bed.” She picked up her robe, then turned on her flashlight and extinguished the lantern so her husband could sleep.
“Helen . . .”
“Ya?” She slowed her pace, shining the light at her feet.
“I’ve been married to you for a long time. I know when you are trying to hide your feelings. But Lucas must make his own way.”
Helen felt like she’d been to battle and lost. “I know,” she said softly as she made her way to the kitchen. She sat at the table and stared into the darkness, then let the tears spill.
* * *
Natalie woke up the next morning in an unfamiliar bed, feeling like she’d been in a car accident. She lifted herself up on her elbows, looked around, and remembered she’d slept in her mother’s bed. She’d insisted on taking Natalie home with her when the hospital released her. Lucas had called a driver.
The events of the day before rushed into her mind. The ordeal with the horse, Lucas, the ambulance ride, and finally getting released from the hospital around midnight. She lifted her arms out from under the covers and eyed the bruises. As she touched her swollen bottom lip, she wondered how bad the rest of her looked, but she wasn’t ready to crawl out of bed yet.
Closing her eyes, she thought about Lucas. There should be no doubt in her mind that they would stay together. He’d told her repeatedly that he loved her and wanted to be with her. He said he would give up his Amish life to have a life with her, willingly and without regret. Natalie believed Lucas loved her, but she had doubts about him giving up the only life he’d ever known, without regrets. Maybe he meant it now, but what if he regretted it later?
Her cell phone was on the nightstand, and her mother had even plugged it in. She picked it up and saw that she had seven texts. The first one was from her father late last night.
Nat, I love you, and I’ll be there first thing in the morning. Mom says you’re okay, but I’m coming anyway.
There were two texts from Mary this morning. The first one read, Lucas let us know what happened. We love you. The second, Please come to supper Friday if you feel up to it.
The last four texts were from Lucas. She’d been loopy from the pain medicine last night and fell right to sleep when she got into her mother’s bed. In succession, the texts read, I love you so much, but I’m sure you are still sleeping, so I won’t call this early, then, I’ll call you later when I can talk, next was, I’m crazy in love with you, and finally, You are the only person for me. I love you.
She wrote back, I love you too. Library Wednesday at three?
In less than a minute, her phone dinged. Can’t really talk right now, but ya, I will be there. Love you.
Natalie forced herself to sit up, even though her head was spinning. She was wearing one of her mother’s nightgowns, but she didn’t even remember getting out of her bloody clothes, which were already laundered and folded on the dresser. Was her mother up all night, or did she get up early to wash the clothes? She glanced at the time on her phone, and her eyes widened when she saw it was nine thirty. The moment she stood, she realized she wouldn’t have been able to go to class today anyway. Putting pressure on her ankle hurt, and when she lifted the nightgown, she saw bruising up and down both legs. Her knees were weak as she hopped on one foot to her mother’s bathroom and looked in the mirror. “Wow,” she said softly.
Her lip was super swollen on the right side, but at least there weren’t any stitches. She had a bruise on her cheek and the beginning of a black eye. Thank You, God, for not letting it be worse. She’d been so stupid to get on that horse. She’d thought if she could do something successfully involving animals, or face a fear, maybe there was still a way to become a veterinarian. She was so unsure about school and what her future held, but knowing Lucas would be a part of it gave her comfort.
Natalie heard voices coming from somewhere, but they were muffled. It took awhile for her to get dressed. Every movement caused an ache somewhere on her body. Once she had clothes on, she hobbled down the hallway, then into the living room.
“Hey, baby.” Her mother hurried over to hug her.
“Ow, Mom.” She wiggled out of the embrace, and her mother stepped back and made room for Natalie’s father.
“I’m not going to manhandle you the way your mother just did.” He smiled and kissed her on the cheek. “Do you feel as bad as you look?”
“Thanks, Dad.” She tried to smile, but her swollen lip wouldn’t allow it. “I hurt everywhere.”
“What in the world made you try to ride a horse that a professional couldn’t even stay on?” He frowned. “You could have been killed.”
Her mother let out a heavy sigh. “That’s what I asked last night. You scared me to death, Natalie.”
“Well, it wasn’t a picnic for me either. It was a dumb thing to do, but I’d gotten the horse to trust me a little bit, and he actually did let me get on his back. Then he went nuts.” She eased herself onto the couch as she reached up and touched her swollen eye. “I think I’m going to have a big ol’ shiner.” Groaning, she laid her head back against the couch. Her parents stood next to each other and stared at her. It was the first time in a long while that they were in the same room together without yelling or her mother crying.
Her dad finally sat down beside her, but her mother stayed standing, hands folded together in front of her. Uh-oh. They had talked, come up with a plan, or made a major decision about something. She’d seen these looks on their faces before. Natalie, your mother and I don’t want you seeing that boy in your math class. Natalie, please don’t dye your hair purple. Natalie, your mother and I are separating. Natalie, your mother and I are getting a divorce. And the list went on. Now, would it be, Natalie, your mother and I are getting back together?
“Nat . . .” Her father took a deep breath.
Here it comes. She closed her eyes.
“Your mother said she’s been concerned about your relationship with Lucas. I mean, you do come from two entirely different worlds.”
Natalie lifted her head and opened her eyes, although the right one didn’t want to cooperate due to the swelling. “Everyone has been worried about it, Lucas and me included. We tried to walk away from each other, but it only lasted three days.” Pausing, she realized that wasn’t entirely accurate. Lucas had actually walked away from her.
She glanced back and forth between her parents. “We don’t want to be without each other, so we will go back to trusting God’s will for us.” In the back of her mind, she wondered if Lucas had acted out of duress.
“What if Lucas isn’t willing to leave his people to be with you?” Her father narrowed his eyebrows into a frown. “Then what? Are you going to become Amish?”
“He said he would leave the Amish world to be with me, without any regrets. And he won’t be shunned because he hasn’t been baptized yet.” Again, she wondered if yesterday’s event had brought forth emotions Lucas was trying to bury. But all of his follow-up texts . . . “Dad, Lucas and I will figure it out. Right now, I feel like I’ve been run over by a train.”
Her father grinned. “It was a horse.”
“Ha-ha. I know.” Natalie held his hand when he reached for hers.
“You’re right. Take today to rest.” After he squeezed her hand, he let go and stood. “I just had to lay eyes on my little girl and make sure she was in one piece.”
“Banged up, but in one piece.” She eased her bare feet onto the coffee table.
“I’ll talk to you later.” He turned to Natalie’s mother, gently held both of her upper arms, and kissed her on the cheek. “And I’ll talk to you later too.”
Natalie waited until he was out the door before she crossed her bruised arms over her chest and stared at her mother, whose face was as red as the blouse she had on today. “What was that about?”
She shrugged. “I’m sure he’ll call me later to check on you.”
“I won’t be here. I’ll be at my apartment, and he can call me on my cell. I’m not a child.” She lowered her head and shook it. “Are you getting back together?” At least Natalie didn’t live here to witness any fighting that might be forthcoming.
“We haven’t discussed that. Your father and I thought it might be best if you stayed here for a while, just until you’re feeling better.” Her mother smiled, as if their entire world hadn’t been turned upside down over the last couple of years, as if they were back to being a family again.
“I wasn’t planning on staying here.” Natalie glanced at the clock on the mantel. “It’s after ten—don’t you need to go to work? You’re going to be late.”
Her mother gasped a little. “Yes. You’re right. I do.” She paused, eying Natalie up and down. “But my hours are flexible. I feel like I should stay home with you.”
Natalie shook her head slowly. Even that simple movement hurt, but she tried not to cringe so her mother wouldn’t decide to babysit her all day. It was a sweet offer, but Natalie would be more comfortable in her own bed. “Go to work, Mom. You need the money, and I’ll probably go back to my apartment.” Then she realized there was a problem. “Where’s my car?”
“Oh, it’s still at Moses’s house.” Her mother quickly turned toward the hutch behind her and picked up her purse and keys.
“Wait, then. You can take me to get my car.” The thought of being stuck here all day and possibly even tomorrow and not being able to see Lucas gave her the strength to lift herself off the couch.
“No way.” Cecelia pressed her lips firmly together as she slapped her hands to her hips. “You’re in no condition to drive. I’ll take you to get your car when I get home this afternoon.”
“That doesn’t even make sense. It’s almost forty minutes from Montgomery to Orleans as it is.” Natalie found her purse. “Please just take me, or you know I’ll call someone to come get me.”
Her mother growled. “I think you should give yourself more time to rest, but come on.”
Natalie hobbled to the car, and the drive to Moses’s house was quiet as she drifted off to sleep. When she opened her eyes, her mother was nudging her. “Honey, we’re here.”
She blinked a few times, thinking that, for once, her mother might be right. She was hurting all over. Natalie couldn’t control her flinching, and her mom was suddenly around the car and opening Natalie’s door. After she helped her out, she kept an arm around her. “Maybe I could lie down on Moses’s couch for a while before I go home?”
“Of course you can. He has an extra bedroom, too, but it’s upstairs.”
Natalie leaned into her mom’s hold and curled an arm around her. “I love you, Mom.”
“And I love you.”
They took a few more steps. “Moses isn’t even here. His buggy is gone.”
“Okay.” Natalie was ready to lie down on the grass and couldn’t get to the couch fast enough.
* * *
After Cecelia got Natalie settled on the couch, her daughter was asleep within minutes. Cecelia shivered every time she thought about that horse dragging Natalie around the arena. Lucas had probably saved her life. He seemed like a nice young man who really cared about Natalie, but to be with her, he’d have to make a lot of sacrifices.
Cecelia heard horse hooves approaching, so she tiptoed across the den, gently opened the door, and closed it quietly behind her. She wanted to let Moses know Natalie was asleep on the couch. Then she’d fill him in on everything that happened. But it wasn’t Moses who stepped out of the buggy. It was Helen and one of her sons. Cecelia walked toward them.
“How is Natalie?” Helen brushed off what looked like flour from her black apron.
“She’s pretty banged up.” Cecelia nodded over her shoulder. “She’s actually asleep on the couch inside.”
Helen nodded before she turned to the young man next to her. “I don’t know if you remember mei sohn Jacob.”
“Hello, Jacob.” She turned back to Helen. “Moses isn’t here, if you were wanting to speak to him.”
Helen pointed toward the arena and spoke to her son. “After you check on that wild horse, go ahead and check on the other animals.”
Jacob nodded before he walked off, and Helen turned back to Cecelia. “Nee, I knew he wasn’t home. After you left and followed the ambulance last night, I waited for about two hours so I could tell him that his horse was sleeping and not dead or sick, but he never showed up. He still wasn’t home at four o’clock this morning.” She shrugged. “I figure he must not have come home, which isn’t like him since he has these animals to tend to. Mei boys take care of their three horses, but Moses has about a dozen of his own.”
“Hmm . . . He said he was going to town for errands when he left yesterday, and I had the impression that he wouldn’t be gone very long.” Cecelia tucked her semi-blonde hair behind her ears.
“I’m glad Natalie is recovering well. It will probably take awhile for her to feel back to normal.” Helen started to walk in the direction her son had gone.
“Helen . . .” Cecelia was barefoot. She’d kicked off her shoes in the house so they didn’t click against the wood floor and wake up Natalie. As she stepped across the pebbles on the driveway to get to Helen, she cringed. “Ow, ow, ow.” Then she glanced at Helen’s bare feet, chafed around the edges. Nope. Natalie would never live like that. But Cecelia wanted absolute assurance that Lucas didn’t think she might consider it. “I guess you saw the way Lucas was with Natalie yesterday.”
Helen raised her chin, the way she often did when they spoke about their children. “Ya. And I saw the way Natalie was with Lucas . . . after he saved her life, that is.”
Cecelia brought a hand to her chest. “And I will be forever grateful to Lucas for that. But . . . aren’t you worried about where this is going now? It looked more serious than I could have imagined, especially since they recently decided not to see each other anymore. Lucas would have to make a lot of changes to be with Natalie.”
Helen cut her eyes at Cecelia, that chin of hers lifted even higher. “I am well aware of that.” She turned to walk away.
“Wait. Helen.” Cecelia scratched her forehead as she tried to think of a way to let Helen know she wasn’t happy about the relationship either. But she didn’t want to hurt Helen’s feelings. The woman had tranquilized a horse that could have killed Natalie, and she was kind enough to ask how Natalie was doing. “I’m not in favor of this relationship either. I’m sure Lucas is a fine young man, but Natalie is going to college, and I don’t want anything—or anyone—to derail her plans.”
Cecelia wasn’t even sure if that was the case, but Lucas would still have a strong influence on Natalie’s decisions, whether she realized it or not. “We’re on the same side when it comes to Lucas and Natalie. What if this thing with them goes the distance and they decide to get married? What kind of a job can Lucas get in the outside world with only an eighth-grade education?”
Helen’s face turned bright red. “Is that what is at stake for you, Cecelia? That your daughter will marry beneath herself? What is happening to mei family is every parent’s nightmare—one of our children leaving to go live in a world where we can’t be sure they are safe. To live in a world with people who are unequally yoked with us. Temptation, crime, and a host of worldly things will threaten our Lucas and everything he has been taught and stands for.”
Cecelia pressed her lips into a thin line, then took a deep breath. “Careful, Helen. You make it sound like your people are better than us, and that doesn’t seem very Christian to me.”
“Isn’t that what you just implied when you said Lucas only has an eighth-grade education?”
“Okay, I probably shouldn’t have said that.” She did regret it. Cecelia knew lots of people who had dropped out of school and gone on to have successful careers. “I think we are just going to have to call a truce and accept what is happening. They’re young and haven’t been spending time together all that long. This could fizzle out, and we could be worrying for nothing.”
“I hope you’re right. Natalie is the last thing Lucas needs.”
Cecelia’s jaw dropped. “There are tons of men who would love to have Natalie in their life. Lucas should count his lucky stars.”
Helen hung her head for a few seconds, and when she looked back up, a fire blazed in her eyes. “Lucas will probably give up everything that is important to him to be with Natalie. We will pray that he stays true to his faith if and when he chooses to be with your daughter. But your world is filled with temptation, and Lucas would be living a lifestyle we don’t approve of.”
Cecelia’s mouth fell open again. “You make it sound like our way of life will influence Lucas’s choices for good or bad, but how he was raised will play a large factor in the choices he makes. And I’m sure your community has plenty of crime, sinners, and people who make bad judgments just like everywhere else.”
“Of course we have sinners, but the most important part of our detachment from the outside world is that we are unequally yoked with the Englisch.” She shook her head. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Try me.” Cecelia spat the words.
“We are certain of those in our district, of their belief in God and their commitment to the Ordnung, the rules we follow and know by heart. Ya, we have sinners among us. We are all sinners. And for that reason, we try to stay as detached as we can from others—those we don’t know, those who might think they know the Lord but who are not living by His standards.”
“Helen, you don’t know anything about me. Or Natalie. How do you know that our faith in God isn’t as strong as yours?” Cecelia was reaching, but it made for a good argument.
Helen offered a sad smile. “That’s just it. We don’t.”
Cecelia scratched her head. “Okay, well . . . I guess we could go on like this all day, but I’ve got work to do.”
Helen faced off with her. “I will be hoping and praying that this is an infatuation that will pass.”
Cecelia clenched her fists at her sides before she took a deep breath. This wasn’t worth it. “I will be hoping and praying the same thing.” She turned to go inside and eased the door open, her stomach clenching when she saw Natalie standing by the open window. Cecelia’s heart pounded. She sighed. “How much did you hear?”
A tear rolled down Natalie’s swollen cheek. “Enough.”