Chapter Seven
Aldris
I was a good man. Sure, I’d made my fair share of mistakes in the past, but I was a good man. Yes, a great deal of my mistakes came by way of cheating on Jennifer, but still, I had made amends for my actions, even if not directly with her. I’d gone to church and leaned on Christ while becoming an active member. I may not have been doing everything right by fornicating with Lucinda and shacking up with her, but I only did that—well, the shacking up part—because I knew she’d be my wife. As for the premarital sex part, well, everybody has a vice. At least I was faithful to her and wanted to make her my wife. I never said I was a perfect Christian, and if you find one, please point them out to me so I can tell you in awe that you’ve met God.
After messing over Jennifer and meeting many wrong women, I was happy God sent Lucinda my way. I tried to get everything right after getting it wrong. I took care of her and Nadia. I loved them and treated them like the queen and princess they were, and I took care of all the household expenses. We went to church together, we prayed together, and we played together. We were a family.
Even when Lucinda and I got in disagreements, I’d walk away and let us both calm down. Even if I was right, I found a reason to apologize because I wanted Lucinda to understand that I truly loved her, and if I was wrong, I went above and beyond to make it up to her. They were my world, and I would give my life for them.
Like I said, I was a good man, so why, for heaven’s sake, was I being slapped with a paternity suit? The possibility of being a father was something I looked forward to sharing with Lucinda. So why now? And why me? And why the hell didn’t Jennifer tell me this sooner?
Wasn’t there a loophole for karma, especially if you changed your life around? Perhaps some old college buddy clued her in to the fact that I was getting married and she wanted to get even, or maybe she just felt like fucking with me after all these years because she had a grudge. Maybe she was on some female liberation and revenge conquest. I just refused to freaking believe that I got her pregnant and she didn’t tell me. I absolutely refused to believe that.
Even if it was true, how could this chick—yep, I said chick for lack of a more appropriate word—keep something as precious as a child away from me for all these years? I just couldn’t believe she’d be that heartless and vindictive. Being hurt is one thing, but denying a parent their rightful relationship with their child is downright scandalous. I didn’t want to believe that Jennifer could be that person, no matter how badly I had hurt her.
While at work, I impatiently waited for my attorney’s phone call. So much was on my mind that by 5:00 p.m. I still hadn’t finished my work, and it had taken me an extra hour just to submit my daily reports. When the call finally came, all I could think about as I listened to him feed me a bunch of shit I really didn’t want to hear was, this child is not mine.
“What do you mean I have to take the paternity test?” I asked my attorney as I toyed with a pen on my desk.
“Aldris, I understand that you feel this child is not yours, and you have justifiable cause to feel this way. However, it doesn’t dispute the fact that you’ve been court ordered to do so. She’s paying for this herself, and the law requires that you comply,” my attorney advised.
“So, I want to take my own test with people I trust.”
“You’re more than welcome to pay for any others that you want, but you still have to take this one.”
“How will I know it’s not rigged?”
“The courts are sending you to their facility, not one chosen by Jennifer. Therefore, no one has privileged information about the facility or its staff. Aldris, let me just shoot this to you straight. I can assure you no one there gives a damn about you or your situation. It’s just their job.”
I sighed, rubbing my forehead in frustration. “So, when do I have to do this, again?”
“Tomorrow at ten a.m. The results will be back in forty-eight hours, and we will go to court on that Friday at one p.m. That’s where I shine. So far, she’s asking for back child support, continued child support, a visitation schedule, and for you to provide health insurance. I’m flat out contesting back support unless she can provide proof that you either knew about the child, or that she’s attempted to gain child support prior to the case. The health insurance is debatable depending on her employment. Visitation will be worked out, and I will try to get your child support reduced to as low as possible given the circumstances. Of course, all of this is based on the results of the paternity test,” he explained.
Growing frustrated, I had to end this conversation. “All right, I’ll be there at ten.”
“Okay. Don’t stress about this part, Aldris. We don’t even know if this is your child yet. Like you said, you doubt that it is. Once we find out the truth, all this will possibly be a distant memory.”
“Attorney Willingham, I understand, but it’s not the possibly I’m worried about. It’s the probably,” I confessed.
“Even that can be resolved, Aldris. You can always opt to give up your parental rights if you do find that this is your child.”
Nope. Not me. Regardless of the outcome, I was a man, not a coward, and definitely not a deadbeat. “No, that won’t be necessary. It would just take a lot of getting used to, that’s all.”
“Well, let’s just get past this first step, and on Friday, we’ll worry about the rest.”
After I hung up, I logged out of my computer and left the building, but I didn’t feel like going straight home. I wanted to be alone and just clear my head. Ever since I found out about this possible child, I’d been so tense. I realized my tense behavior was unfair to Lucinda, but I was upset and worried because I just didn’t know how having an outside child would affect our relationship. My baby wasn’t a jealous woman, and I knew she’d expect me to take care of my own child, but living in that kind of scenario was harder than it sounds. This should’ve been the happiest time of my life. I was getting ready to marry the woman of my dreams, and suddenly, out of left field, there’s a child. What the hell was Jennifer thinking, doing this to me?
After a while, I found myself at my mother’s house. I knew I should’ve gone home to talk to Lucinda instead of my mother, but I needed an outside perspective for guidance. She didn’t say much, but just her listening ear did more good than anything, and I was ready to get home to my lady and baby.
It was 9 p.m. by the time I got home, and I knew Lucinda was going to be mad as hell, especially since she’d called me ten times. When I walked in, I headed to Nadia’s room to peek in on my sleeping beauty and smiled. Knowing that she had school tomorrow, I gently shut the door and made my way down the hall to our bedroom, eager to get out of my suit and get comfortable. I put on my basketball shorts and a T-shirt, then took a deep breath before I headed to our home office, where I was positive Lucinda was working. I could tell before I even opened the door that she was mad as hell from the way I heard her pounding on the keyboard.
I exhaled deeply and opened the door. “Hey, Lu,” I said softly.
She stopped typing without facing me and said, “Hey.”
Feeling a little safe that she didn’t blow up right away, I continued inside and shut the door behind me before I sat down. “I know you’re working, so I won’t disturb you for long,” I said, trying to give myself an easy out.
She finally turned to face me. Her anger was written all over her face. “Oh, so now you’re concerned about my feelings? You waltz your ass up in here after nine o’clock at night without so much as a phone call, change clothes, and then tell me you won’t disturb me for long? You have some nerve, Aldris! Where was this concern at five thirty? Where was this concern when I called your ass ten damn times?”
“I know I was wrong, but I had so much shit on my mind, Lu. This whole situation with Jennifer is really fucking with me right now.”
“And you’re fucking with me,” she yelled angrily as she stood up and leaned against the wall. “So, just how is putting me on the back burner a requirement for you to deal with your issues?”
“I wasn’t putting you on the back burner, Lu—”
“Bullshit and die, Aldris! Yes, you were.”
“Nadia is asleep—”
“As if you care about that.”
Now, that was a low blow. When I looked at Nadia, I didn’t see my stepdaughter. I saw my daughter. For Lucinda to go there was just plain wrong. “Don’t start that shit now. I do care about Nadia, and you know it.”
“So, coming home any time of the night when she hasn’t seen you all day and asked about you until she fell asleep is showing her that you care, right?”
Her point was valid, and I hated that because it made it seem as if my actions contradicted my words. I rubbed my head as I attempted to calm my tone. “I’m not saying I wasn’t wrong, Lucinda. I’m just saying I needed some space to clear my head. That’s it.”
She ran her fingers through her hair. “Ay dios mío! Aldris, I understand that this shit with Jennifer has got you messed up right now, but I thought we were in this together. I want to be there for you and help you, but I can’t do that if you’re constantly pushing me away.”
There it was: the reason for her brewing storm. Now I understood that her anger was based off sheer concern. She thought my actions were meant to push her away, when in actuality, they were meant so that I didn’t find myself pulling away.
I stood, walked to her, and pulled her close to me. “I realize that now. Don’t you know I’d never intentionally push you away? I’m just used to dealing with things in my own way. I was inconsiderate of your feelings and wellbeing, and I am sorry, Lucinda. I love you.” Bending down, I kissed her on the neck. “Forgive me,” I pleaded, breathing in scent. She smelled so fucking divine.
She giggled despite her anger. “You piss me off.”
“I know.” I tilted her head back and kissed the nape of her neck.
“I should give you my ass to kiss.”
“I know.” I kissed it again.
“I love you, Aldris.”
“I know.” I kissed it again.
“You’re making me horny.”
“I know.” Mission accomplished.
She exhaled, wrapped her arms around my neck, and looked me in the eyes. “I forgive you,” she said and planted a sensual kiss on my mouth.
I held her tighter and leaned my forehead against hers. “I know, and I thank you.”
“Dinner is in the refrigerator—fried chicken, macaroni, chicken-flavored rice, and cornbread.”
“That’s what’s up.” I smiled at her. “I’m going to eat and then shower. If I’m asleep when you finish, wake me up. I’ve got some make-up work to put in.”
“Yes, you certainly do.” She sat down at the computer as I turned to leave. “And Aldris,” she called out after me. “I know you don’t plan on leaving out of this room without telling me exactly where you’ve been.”
“I drove around for a while and then stopped at my mom’s house for a while to talk about all this shit with her. I hope you don’t mind,” I explained, praying she didn’t feel slighted that I’d chosen to talk to my mom about everything instead of coming home and talking to her.
She looked at me with a straight face. “No, babe,” she said and began working. “I figured you were at your mom’s. I gotta get back to work.”
I walked out. Liar, I thought as I closed the door, but as much hot water as I had just gotten myself out of, I had no room to call her out. The moral of the story was: choose your battles—wisely.