CHAPTER 18

The sky had darkened while I walked, and now as the morning waned the sidewalks smelled of petrichor. Clouds lowered tendrils of slate and softest gray, rich with the promise of rain.

As the sky prepared for storm, the eddies of the land cleared. People retreated from stoops, and restaurants helped those lingering at sidewalk tables bring their meals indoors. Umbrellas blossomed. The first drops came, and I moved aside so I wouldn’t impede the people whose steps sped in response. Water fell cool on my brow and bare arms, and soothed skin rough with the city’s grit.

The rain quickened, blurring the world’s edges. In the silvering air, a flash of blue caught my eye. Across the street, a woman had retreated under a grocer’s awning. She bent her dark head to examine a box of grapes. It was her skirt, blue as a cloudless noon sky, that had attracted my attention through the rain.

I’d seen that blue before, peacock-bright, as she argued with a young Chinese girl a dozen blocks past and an hour earlier. Had we both come this way by coincidence? I’d seen thousands of people already today; surely some must have kept walking in my direction. The woman twisted half around. Her eyes met mine briefly before skidding away. She stretched her fingers past the awning’s protection, as if to test the rain, then frowned at the result and returned to inspecting produce.

Audrey would have been subtle, but I was not Audrey. I crossed the street as soon as traffic permitted and strode to the grocer’s. At the last moment, though, I shied away. Suppose I were wrong? I’d make a fool of myself and likely frighten her as well.

I steeled my nerves, gathered what dignity I could in a dress rain-plastered to my frame, and released with regret the solstice’s gift of quiet safety. “Excuse me, ma’am.”

She wasn’t much for subtlety herself. She flinched, and turned to me with an effort that mirrored my own. “Yes, miss?”

As gently as I could, I asked, “Were you following me?”

She sighed, and brushed her hand over her pouffed hair. “I told the man this isn’t what I’m good at. But I suppose he didn’t have much choice. He’s got trouble, and he wanted me to track you and find out if you might help. I was trying to decide if I ought to just ask. You’d better come along back, then.”

She had an umbrella, broad and red, and tried to hold it over both of us. Droplets splashed our shoulders.

“I don’t mind getting wet,” I said. I wanted urgently to know what was going on, and was willing to follow her as long as she didn’t seem a threat. My hand drifted near Grandfather’s rune. He couldn’t provide reinforcement at this time of day, but I didn’t want to simply vanish traceless. “Who’s ‘he’?” Perhaps she was a friend of Freddy’s.

“Nnnnnn-gt-vvv, of course. Not an ordinary sort of man, but it’s as good a word as any.” She looked around nervously. “I’ll take you back to my place. He’ll explain the whole thing better. Unless he’s still running scared; then I suppose I’ll do it. This ain’t normal. I’ve known them since I was a little girl. They’re good people. Peaceable.”

“Are they being … not peaceable?” With effort, I kept from rubbing the rune. Neko.

“I’m afraid so. He’ll explain.” She pushed back her hair again. “I’m Clara Green. His friend near forty-five years now, and travel-mate just this last year.”

“Aphra Marsh.”

“I know. And I know you don’t like them—he told me—but he thinks you can help. For sure no one who does like them seems capable, so maybe he’s right.”

I was glad of the rain in my eyes. “How did you find me? I’m sure I’d remember if we’d met.”

She laughed. “During your first visit to the mine? It’s a wonder you remember any of us two-legged folk. But you’ve been part of our rites, and you’re bound in with us a little now. Nyarlathotep knows your mind through the trapezohedron, and so do they. None of us is ever hard to find.” She sighed and sucked on her lip. “Except that he’s done something to hide us. He isn’t sure how long it’ll work.”

Another thing to hold against them. “I wish they’d told me everything the trapezohedron did. I have bonds already, ones I’ve chosen. It’s good Nnnnnn-gt-vvv knows I’m upset—they weakened those bonds without asking my leave. They must have known I’d refuse, and they didn’t care.”

“That’s not what they’re like. When they fail, it’s just the opposite—they assume anyone would want their gifts, so they don’t need to ask. Nnnnnn-gt-vvv’s better than most. He doesn’t always remember to ask, but he listens when I warn him off.”

I thought of S’vlk’s stories. “You’re lucky.”

“I was just a little girl when I met him. People who come to them older know enough to be awed. I was just excited to go play with the fairies.”

A friend for forty-five years, and traveling for just one. “They didn’t take you on a grand tour of the universe?”

“We’d better catch the train back to Harlem, unless you want to walk all that way again. I thought you had to stop some time for sure, but you just kept going!” She led me down between copper posts, into a station. Her umbrella spattered the floor as she slid it shut. “I wanted to go with him, but I warned him off. My papa needed me—and then my babies needed me. I couldn’t very well leave these old bones”—she slapped her arm cheerfully—“lying in bed while I skipped around the stars. I told him I had to wait. But as they grew I told my Nellie and Jack, you find people who’ll take care of you and stick by you. Now they’re both grown and married and have their own babies in tow, and I can finally travel a little.”

“I wouldn’t have guessed the Outer Ones would put up with that.”

“Maybe you don’t know them as well as you think.”

From the stories I’d heard, the Outer Ones didn’t normally respect human duty. Was Nnnnnn-gt-vvv different, then? He’d given her exactly the chance most men of the air never got, to have a second life after she’d fulfilled her obligations. Perhaps I shouldn’t have, but I felt safer in her company, knowing she understood what it was to serve duty first. She seemed closer kin to us than Freddy.

“I’ll talk to him,” I said.

*   *   *

Clara’s walk-up was three flights above a tiny pharmacy. The building squeezed rail-thin between its neighbors. If people had to raise children in such places, it was no wonder they ran as rambunctious in alleys and sidewalks as Caleb and I had in the open labyrinth of the bogs. I wondered if she’d find our wetlands as overwhelming as I did her concrete and brick, or if all of Earth’s offerings now seemed as narrow to her as these apartments.

She knocked, and waited for the muted rattle of the deadbolt.

Nnnnnn-gt-vvv backed away from her door, pressing against a bookcase to let us in. Clara Green’s narrow living room did not easily accommodate a creature the size of a small horse, and the Outer One hunched its uncountable limbs tight. Wings fogged against the edge of the photo-crowded table and the record player in the corner. Shelves of paperbacks crammed us in tighter: science fiction pulps and romances, and ragged volumes of popular science and history, most of which I’d seen pass across Charlie’s counter.

Clara buried her fingers among Nnnnnn-gt-vvv’s tentacles, and it buzzed louder and pushed against her like a cat. It wore a brass pendant indented with an ornate pattern of spiraling dots, which swung hypnotically as it moved. Clara chuckled. “How’re you doing, old man?”

“You found her.”

“And then she found me. She says the trapezohedron messed with her—” She hmmmed and buzzed with her tongue between her teeth, something in the Outer One’s language that I didn’t catch properly.

“I’m sorry for that,” said Nnnnnn-gt-vvv. “Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt isn’t always … communicative … about our rites. It doesn’t trust our human compatriots as we should; I’d rather let you make your own decisions, even if they’re wrong. Our small philosophical disagreement has cracked the mine apart. It isn’t right. I must speak with you, and with your allies in the government—no matter that we’re mates thrice over, I can’t countenance what Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt’s faction is planning.”

“Which is what, exactly?” I tried to sound more sympathetic than impatient, but my tongue was dry.

Nnnnnn-gt-vvv shuffled limbs and said nothing. It backed as far as it could, claws scraping the floorboards between couch and record player.

But sound crackled from the pendant: a familiar, almost maniacal voice. “Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt thinks it knows what’s best for us, of course it does. So old, so wise. We children need some discipline before we play with fire, that’s all.”

I suspected my shock showed all too clearly on my face before I got it under control. But to meet with Shelean under these circumstances—what did she have to do with this? Is their conflict her doing? My hand stole to where Mary’s shield lay under my collar. “What are you doing here?” I asked sharply.

“Oh, I’m not here. I’m at Freddy’s side, and Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt’s, learning about its plans and making a few small suggestions. This is just an encrypted projector. It’s like talking through a long metal tube—it all echoes.” Her voice turned sober. “You’ve heard terrible things about the K’n-yan, and they’re all true. Believe, as your cousin won’t, that I know the harm done when only the powerful are trusted to choose their lives. When the weak are protected from every danger except those powers. Better to risk letting us burn the world. But Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt thinks I’m being silly. Of course the Outer Ones are better stewards than the Mad Ones. Better than men of the air or the water. They’re old, after all, and wise, and they’ve survived their own wisdom for a long time.”

Nnnnnn-gt-vvv rattled—a sigh? “Shelean speaks the truth. Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt wants to take a more active role in human affairs. To guide your species in this time of hazard, so you can pass through the crucible of your technology and join us among the stars. You may have all the potential it perceives—but conquest isn’t supposed to be our way. Nyarlathotep leads us along the void’s edge, and tests our wisdom and—”

“And watches to see whether we keep our balance or plunge in screaming,” said Shelean cheerfully.

“My point,” said Nnnnnn-gt-vvv, “is that humans deserve the chance to make their own way across the cliff. I think you’ll fall—so many species do. Most of you are insular and provincial and paranoid and prone to making terrible decisions in crises. But if we shape you to fit through that narrow gap, we’ll shave away everything that makes you yourselves. Better to save the few who yearn to travel with us, and offer your leaders what wisdom they’re willing to take freely, and let you own your risks. I love you as much as Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt, but if we believe everyone has something to contribute to the great conversation, we can’t silence you to keep you safe.”

“I—” I sat on the couch, though it brought me close to Nnnnnn-gt-vvv’s shifting limbs and diaphanous wings. Before I spoke I breathed, in and out, slowly, feeling something shift inside me. I looked at the Outer One, pushing through the strangeness, through the nausea of senses that rebelled at its presence. For the first time, I understood in my gut why Freddy would take such people as kin. “I fear for humanity’s future too. And I’m very grateful that you respect it as our future. I’ll do what I can to help.”

“That’s about how I feel,” said Clara. She settled beside me—she still looked nervous, but some of the tension had left her. She gave me the same considering look I’d given Nnnnnn-gt-vvv.

“Tell me—” I took a deep breath. “Tell me exactly what happened. I need to understand where the danger lies.”

“But first,” said Clara to Nnnnnn-gt-vvv, “you come out of the corner and sit down like a civilized person. And pull in your wings before the neighbors ask what I’m smoking. You know you’re leaving trails. You’re going to drive me crazy with all your fuss.”

Nnnnnn-gt-vvv slunk from its retreat. It hunched on the rag rug in the center of the floor, even more out of scale. Crab-like claws flexed against the spiraled fabric; tentacles brushed the floor. Abrupt jerks punctuated their anemone ripples. Its wings contracted to ordinary matter in a gust of cool air. The eternal humming buzz rose and fell, resolving into words as the wings condensed into bat-boned leather.

“It’s hard to speak against them even now. It’s always hard when our debates grow bitter. For aeons we’ve honed our instincts toward cooperation, but sometimes it’s still not enough. The interventionists have closed the mine to dissenters—my faction’s in exile now, dispersed and seeking shelter so we can regroup.

“Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt told you that we left our hills to learn more about humanity’s crisis—what danger you posed to yourselves, how soon you might face extinction. That’s true as far as it goes, but it didn’t tell you that while we came to New York, made our visits to Arkham and New Orleans, each was trying to prove our view of the answer. This argument isn’t confined to Earth, either. Many believe, like Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt, that we’ve been too passive in mining the universe. That we should teach more species to be like us—it would say ‘teach’; I and my faction would say ‘force.’

“Our own flirtation with ecosystem-breaking technologies is aeons past, fallen into legend. In the generations since, we’ve developed weapons subtler and safer and far more powerful. We use them to defend ourselves and our travel-mates; no one would argue against that! But now Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt’s belief-mates say they’ve learned enough, and they think we should use those weapons to bring humans similar safety. If it works here, they can influence their fellows across the cosmos to do the same wherever the opportunity arises.”

“What kind of weapons?” I asked.

“You’ve seen what the trapezohedron can do: showing people more of the universe changes how they think. Then there are the cylinders. Removing people from their bodies makes them less subject to visceral fears, or to instinctive disgust at strangers, even after they return. These are tools if used on the willing, weapons otherwise. There are the arts I used, at their weakest setting, to calm your elders. We have all manner of methods for controlling and shaping minds, for insinuating subtle influence where it won’t be suspected. Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt thinks these will save humanity, but I know your paranoia. We saw it in Arkham, and I know that if they once find a hint of our influence they’ll suspect it everywhere. Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt is too confident. Fail or succeed, the interference it plans will lead to catastrophe.”

Now my mouth was bone-dry. “And it wants to start with Barlow’s team.” A chill went through my bones. “And mine. Why did you follow me for so long instead of telling me my people are in danger? I have to let them know!” I rose from the couch, but sank back as I realized the problem. “They were going to spend today in the—the mine. I warned Mr. Spector that they needed to watch each other, but it may not be enough. And Neko’s there, too. Can I still get in? Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt … it has reason to think I’d go along with it trying to … influence Barlow’s people. I could try to get them out…” But I felt sick with the suspicion that my testimony had spurred Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt to do everything it wanted. I’d aimed its ambition at people who, for all their faults, didn’t deserve to fall under its sway, and who could be used to inflict terrible harm.

This is the same mistake I made in January. Treating people I disliked as problems to be solved, instead of seeing them as people. I should have refused to answer Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt’s question. Ïa Cthulhu, please don’t let my mistake cost lives this time. As useless as a prayer could be.

“You mustn’t go back to the mine,” said Nnnnnn-gt-vvv. “Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt wants your support very badly, and doesn’t fully trust you. It will use our weapons to control you if it can. It perceives you as zzzzz’v’ck.”

“Oh, high praise!” said Shelean.

“What does it mean?” I asked. I clamped my hands in my lap, nerves threatening to descend into useless tremors.

Shelean: “It means you’re a hub and a lever. You know people who’d otherwise never meet, you link them to each other, and they listen to you. If you were an Outer One, you’d be hailed as a great leader—but you’re human, poor thing, so you’ll just get leaders who want to use you. Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt first among them.”

I wanted to pace, but there wasn’t room. I clasped my hands, nails stinging flesh. I hated to admit it, but the Outer One was right: going to the mine on my own was no better an idea now than it had been last night. Worse, knowing that Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt sought to draw me in. But to avoid the place entirely—that I could not countenance. “My sister—Neko Koto. Do you know where she is, what Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt intends for her? Can you get her out?”

“She came to the mine a couple of days ago,” said Clara. “I remember her—we always pay attention to newcomers, even though there have been a lot lately. But they were treating her normally, introducing her around, teaching her our ways.”

“She asked about differences between air and water,” said Nnnnnn-gt-vvv. “She seemed worried, but she was there willingly. It’s those who wouldn’t willingly cooperate whose minds are in danger.”

Can’t I fear what my sister does to herself willingly? I forced my thoughts from that track. “Let me think. Most of us are supposed to meet at Coney Island tonight. The elders should be able to detect any new interference, maybe even treat it.” If Barlow cooperates. “The rest of us who used the trapezohedron—are you looking for them as well? Will Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt look for them?”

“Are they also alone?”

“It’s the Summer Solstice.” Why today? Did they know?

“I don’t observe holidays based on orbital patterns. It seems presumptuous to pretend they shape our lives as they do those of the planetbound. Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt celebrates them, of course. Your celebration involves isolation?”

“Yes—Charlie and Audrey will be on their own. So will Frances, but she’s never been involved in your rituals.” Trumbull was exploring the New York Public Library in spite of her disdain for their collection. Better not to mention Caleb and Deedee, perhaps still unknown to the Outer Ones and not included in their plans.

“Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt may be interested in your companions, but it has other priorities—your agents who visit the mine unwitting are the most vulnerable.”

“Okay. The fastest way to reach them is probably to wait at their hotel room. Whatever’s happened to them during the day, we’ll deal with it when they return. Would you be able to help? Tell if something’s off?”

“I … may be able to.”

“What it isn’t saying,” said Shelean, “is that it’s gone to a lot of trouble to hide what it’s doing and where it’s gone, and Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt’s work could be just as well-hidden.”

Arcs of pain in my palms, to keep me focused on moving forward. “Then that’s what we’ve got to work with. I’ll take the train to the Ritz. Can you make your own way there?”

“Yes.” Its buzz rose in pitch, painfully, then fell again. “I’d feel happier if you’d come with me. Anything could happen, traveling the long way.”

“With all due respect—I saw how your shortcut treated Grandfather and S’vlk. I don’t care for it.”

“I startled them, took them without asking. I’ve already said I shouldn’t have. If you don’t try to claw my joints open, I promise I won’t suppress your emotions. And if you insist on traveling on the street again, I’ll let you—but I think it’s a terrible idea. We’ve tried to be discreet, but any of us could have been tracked.”

I didn’t want to see more of how the Outer Ones traveled. But if Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt really was after me, I’d probably like what it had in mind even less. “Will it have the same effect as the trapezohedron? Will it dissociate me from my body, or do anything else that would make it easier for you to”—I had no polite word, but recalled Freddy’s term—“encircle me?”

“No. During sidestepping, your body and mind travel in tandem. Someone skilled in dreamwalking stands a chance of finding their way home if they pull away. Otherwise there’s no relationship to any art of separation.”

If that was true, then the last remaining question was Nnnnnn-gt-vvv’s own trustworthiness. My judgment was demonstrably faulty: I should not have sacrificed Barlow’s team to Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt’s benevolence. But Nnnnnn-gt-vvv wasn’t asking for targets, or probing for vulnerability. I could work with it, at least for now.

“All right.” My nails still dug into my skin; I mustn’t let them draw blood. “Let’s go, then.”

“She’s not used to giving directions in the outskirts,” said Clara. “How are you going to know where to go?”

“Can you explain it to her?” Tentacles swiveled in her direction. “You should stay here, in safety, while she takes me to the hotel.”

“But I’m not gonna. First, because I’m your travel-mate. Second because Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt could send someone to find me as easily as you found Miss Marsh here. This place isn’t ‘safe’ anymore.” Nnnnnn-gt-vvv’s hum sounded distressed, but it didn’t argue further.

“What do I need to do?” I asked.

“Even without equipment Nnnnnn-gt-vvv can—not exactly see your thoughts, but perceive the shape of your mind. If you think about where you met these people, not just what the place looked like but also how you got there, the map of the world around it, he should be able to get close. From the outskirts you can look at the world and point out the right room.”

“It’s easy,” said Shelean. “All you have to do is not get distracted by getting yanked out of physical reality for the first time.”

“You shut up for once,” suggested Clara. “What are they doing back at the mine now?”

“Aphra’s secret agents just left. If Kvv-vzht-mmmm-vvt did anything big to them, it wasn’t while I was in the room—but it hasn’t exactly been carting me around. There was a lot of negotiation behind doors.”

“One at a time?” I asked.

“They stuck together, as far as I could tell. But again, I’m basically planted in the conversation circle listening to gossip, and trying to get Freddy past”—she mimicked a child’s distressed whine—“‘But how can they be fighting with each other?’ Poor boy, he so wants them to be better than humans.”

“Do you love him?” I asked abruptly.

She sighed, exaggerated as a heartsick youth. But her voice turned sober again. “I’m getting there. I still feel the wonder of having people I can really talk with, and I see that in him, too. He basks in ideas like he’s standing in the sun for the first time. I can’t fault him for naïveté while he’s still blinking at the light.”