Now that she was fully awake, Catvinkle was nervous. So nervous, in fact, that she wouldn’t touch her salmon. She was walking from one end of her room to the other, and when she got to the end of the room she would turn back and go the other way.
‘Are you going to finish your salmon or …?’ asked Ula.
‘Or what?’ asked Catvinkle innocently.
‘Or will it be left to go to waste?’
‘I think it’s going to be left to go to waste,’ said Catvinkle.
Ula thought for a moment before speaking. ‘How do you feel about that?’
‘I’m fine with it. I’m too nervous about the National Kitten Baby-Shoe Dancing Competition to be at all hungry.’
‘Do you think I should eat it?’ asked Ula.
‘Look, you can try. Although, since I’m extremely nervous and since you love me so much, you’re probably extremely nervous too. But maybe watching you eat it will make me hungry.’
With that encouragement and having already eaten the salmon that Mr Sabatini had put in a bowl for her, Ula put her snout into Catvinkle’s food bowl and started to snack on Catvinkle’s salmon.
Catvinkle’s tail curled and uncurled, curled and uncurled, as she watched her hungry friend.
‘Ulee, you’re a genius! It’s working! Just watching you eat my salmon from my bowl is making me hungry.’
But by the time she’d finished saying this, the bowl was empty. Ula had eaten all of Catvinkle’s salmon.
A silence hung in the air. They just looked at each other for a moment. Ula tilted her head to the left and then to the right and then back to the middle again. Then Ula spoke.
‘Catvinkle, you wouldn’t have a very woolly blanket that I could wear, do you?’
‘No, why?’ asked Catvinkle.
‘I’m feeling a little sheepish,’ said Ula. ‘I’m sorry, Catvinkle, now you’re feeling hungry but all your salmon is gone.’
‘Never mind,’ said Catvinkle. ‘I probably shouldn’t eat before the baby-shoe dancing competition anyway. Besides, the hunger’s gone. I’m starting to get nervous all over again.’
‘But you’re such a good baby-shoe dancer and you’ve won the competition before. Why are you so nervous?’
‘Because I lost last year to that evil little fur ball, Twinkiepaws. I’m not sure if I told you this but I hate, hate, hate her.’
‘No, you told me that you hate her but not that you hate, hate, hate her.’
‘Well, I know you better now. There’s no point holding anything back. Do you mind if I climb atop you and sniff your musk for a while?’
‘Be my guest.’
So Catvinkle climbed on top of Ula and started taking deep breaths with her nose buried into Ula’s fur. Within a very short time it seemed to be doing the trick.
‘Oh, that’s good! That’s so good! Ulee, that musk is the most beautiful calming smell I’ve ever smelled. If I could feel this calm at the National Kitten Baby-Shoe Dancing Competition I know I could win.’
This gave Ula an idea. ‘Hey, Catvinkle, what if I came with you to the competition? Then just before it was your turn to dance you could take in some of my musk and feel calm enough to win.’
‘But Ulee, you can’t come. The competition is being held in Vondelpark at Kittens Anonymous. I can’t bring a dog to Kittens Anonymous.’
‘No, I suppose not.’
‘Definitely not. You know how those cats feel about dogs.’
‘Is it fear, mistrust and dislike?’ Ula asked.
‘Yes, that’s it.’
‘But you don’t think of me that way, do you, Catvinkle? And you’re a cat!’
‘Yeah, but I don’t really think of you as a dog. I think of you as my best friend, Ulee.’
‘But I’m also a dog.’
‘I know, I know. That’s why I can’t take you to the competition even though your musk would make me all calm inside.’
They both sighed.
‘Sigh,’ said Catvinkle.
‘You can say that again,’ said Ula.
‘I can,’ said Catvinkle, ‘but do you mind if I don’t? After all, you’ve already sighed once yourself.’
‘Hey, I’ve just had an idea!’ Ula said. ‘I’d better say it out loud before I lose it.’
‘Is it a good idea?’ asked Catvinkle.
‘Mmmm … Not sure.’
‘Well, say it just in case.’
‘What if I came with you to the National Kitten Baby-Shoe Dancing Competition and we told all the cats there that I was a cat?’
Catvinkle didn’t seem too excited by this idea. ‘No offence, Ulee – and you know this is coming from a place of love – but you look really quite a lot like a dog. A very pretty Dalmatian but, you know, still a dog.’
They both slumped down onto the ground in disappointment.
‘I know!’ said Ula, full of enthusiasm. ‘What if we told them I was a cat dressed as a dog in a dog disguise because I was a really, really famous cat and didn’t want any people or animals to know who I was?’
‘Do you think it would work?’
‘With every hair on my rump I’m not sure it’s a good idea, but at least it’s an idea,’ said Ula.
‘Every hair on your rump!’ said Catvinkle. ‘That’s a lot of musky-smelling hair! That’s good enough for me. Let’s give it a try!’
‘Great!’ said Ula, very pleased to have come up with an idea that might help Catvinkle.
‘Now,’ said Catvinkle, ‘we need to think of a cat who’s so famous everyone would believe that she chose to disguise herself as a dog. Who’s a famous cat around here?’
‘You’re asking the wrong animal. We dogs don’t know that much about cats, even the famous ones,’ said Ula.
‘Okay, I’ll just have to figure everything out for myself. Let me see, who’s a famous cat? Who?’
‘Are you talking to yourself?’ asked Ula.
‘Yes, sorry if I didn’t make that clear enough, Ulee. Although I can understand that you might have thought it was my tummy rumbling. I haven’t eaten anything all day.’
‘Oh, I know,’ said Ula sympathetically.
‘Yes, that’s right, you do know. Don’t keep thinking about it, Ulee. You’ll only make yourself upset.’
It was at that moment that Ula’s eye fell on a pile of newspapers that Mr Sabatini kept piled up in Catvinkle’s room before he sent them to be recycled.
‘Are there any famous kittens in the newspaper?’ Ula asked.
‘Not in the human newspapers, but maybe in the New Paw Times,’ answered Catvinkle. ‘Hey, as a matter of fact, I read an article that said Ketzington was planning a visit to Amsterdam.’
‘Who?’ asked Ula.
‘Ketzington.’
‘Who’s Ketzington?’ Ula asked again.
‘Are you serious?’ said Catvinkle in amazement. ‘You’ve never heard of Ketzington D. Kitten and the Snufflecats from New York?’
‘No, sorry, I haven’t,’ answered Ula.
‘Really? Ketzington is only the biggest singing sensation in all of Kittendom! I thought even dogs would have heard of her.’
‘Maybe my cousin, Lobbus the brave dog Lobbus, has heard of her.’
Catvinkle thought for a moment. ‘You must know some of her songs without realising that they’re hers. Do you know “Stairway to Ketzington”?’
‘No.’
‘“I’ve Got My Paw On a String”?’
‘No.’
‘“Stormy Kitten”?’
‘No.’
‘“You and the Night and the Kitten”?’
‘No.’
‘“I’ve Got You Under My Fur”? “Fascinating Kitten”? “The Lady Is a Cat”?’
‘Sorry, no,’ said Ula.
‘You’ve never heard of Ketzington? Wow! They even wrote a Broadway musical about her life.’
‘What was it called?’
‘“Ketz”.’
‘Never heard of it.’
‘She has a deli named after her on the Lower East Side – Ketz’s Deli – and they even named one of the famous East Side avenues after her. Surely you’ve heard of Ketzington Avenue?’
‘Sorry, Catvinkle. I’m a dog.’
‘I know,’ said Catvinkle, ‘but … you must know “I Only Have Paws For You”?’
‘I might know that one,’ said Ula hopefully.
Catvinkle looked at her carefully to see if she was telling the truth. ‘Do you really think you might know that one, or are you just saying that because you want it to be true?’
‘Um … Could you repeat the question?’
‘Would you like me not to?’ asked Catvinkle.
‘Well, we could let the moment pass,’ said Ula.
‘The point is, Ulee, among cats and kittens everywhere, Ketzington is a hugely famous cat. And she’s known to be touring Amsterdam this week.’
‘So I could come with you to the National Kitten Baby-Shoe Dancing Competition,’ said Ula excitedly, ‘pretending to be Ketzington disguised as a Dalmatian dog so that no one will bother her and ask her for a paw print.’
‘Yes!’ said Catvinkle, full of hope. ‘It’s such a brilliant idea I can’t believe I thought of it.’
‘Did I help?’ asked Ula.
‘I can’t believe I thought of it with some help from you,’ said Catvinkle, ‘and on an empty stomach.’
‘Then,’ said Ula, ‘if you’re feeling at all nervous before your baby-shoe dance you can just sniff my fur for musky goodness and you’ll feel happy and calm again.’
‘Yes,’ said Catvinkle. ‘And if I’m happy and calm I’ll definitely be able to beat that evil little cat, Twinkiepaws.’
‘Whom you hate, hate, hate!’
‘You have such a good memory for details,’ said Catvinkle as she tied her baby shoes around her neck.