Joss didn’t want to admit it, but she was nervous. Since it was dinner with her parents, and she did that every week, it made no sense. It wasn’t like she was hoping for her parents’ approval. Or blessing. Or whatever.
She stopped pacing when Olivia emerged from the bedroom. She was wearing a dress—she almost always wore a dress—that looked nice, but not too nice, like she was trying too hard. That was good. “You look great. Are you nervous?”
Olivia smiled. “Not really. Should I be?”
“No.”
“Are you?” Olivia narrowed her eyes.
“Am I what?”
“Are you nervous to have me meet your parents?”
“No.” It came out like more of a question than a statement, and Joss fought the urge to cringe.
“You are. Why are you nervous? Are you afraid they won’t like me?”
“It’s not like that.”
“Then what?” Hands on hips. Joss had come to find the gesture both cute and kind of sexy. In the moment, it was simply unnerving.
“It’s just, well, I’ve never dated a client before, so there’s that. Plus, I think they’re probably different from your family.” Joss started to wish she hadn’t brought it up in the first place.
Olivia laughed. “God, I hope so.”
“I’m serious.”
“I am, too. I mean, I love my family, but there’s a reason I moved a thousand miles away. We have practically nothing in common.” Joss thought about the little she knew of Olivia’s family. Both parents lawyers, sister married to a doctor. Joss wasn’t sure what made her more uncomfortable—the number of degrees they’d earned or the amount of money they had.
It wasn’t that Joss was embarrassed by her family. In fact, she felt quite the opposite. It was more a worry that they wouldn’t have anything to talk about. Olivia would make some esoteric joke that no one got, then everything would be weird and uncomfortable for the rest of the day. It was a ridiculous fear. Her family didn’t believe in weird and uncomfortable. And Olivia had yet to act like the snooty professor Joss thought her to be when they first met. Joss let that fact sink in. Olivia had turned out to be nothing short of charming. If anyone wound up feeling awkward in this situation, it would be Joss. “You’re right. Everything is going to be fine.”
Olivia looked at her skeptically. “Is it me you’re trying to convince? Or yourself?”
Joss rolled her eyes. “Clearly you’re fine enough to make fun of me, so I’ll take that as my answer.”
Olivia shook her head, but then put a hand on Joss’s arm. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to make light of something that is stressing you out. What can I do?”
It was silly to be worked up in the first place, wasn’t it? Just because she hadn’t brought a woman home in a couple of years. Just because she hadn’t dated a client ever. Just because her family, instead of being judgmental, found the whole thing…what? Amusing, maybe? She hadn’t even planned on introducing Olivia to her parents. But then her mother had asked and Ben and Daphne wouldn’t let it go. Joss gave in to shut them up more than anything else. Besides, it was just a casual family dinner. It didn’t have to have all sorts of heavy meaning attached to it. “You don’t need to do anything. I’m sorry I made it seem like such a big deal.”
“Okay,” Olivia said, seemingly satisfied with the answer. “I’m really looking forward to it.”
“Good, because we should probably go.”
“I’m ready.” Olivia walked to the kitchen. She picked up her purse, a bottle of wine, and a tin of some sort.
“What is that?”
“A little hostess gift for your mom.”
“Not the wine, the tin.”
“The wine is just what you bring. The tin is the hostess gift, or rather, what’s inside it. It’s a batch of pralines.”
“Pralines?”
“Yes, they’re a candy made from brown sugar and pecans.”
“I know what they are. What I’m curious about is where you got them.”
Olivia offered her a satisfied smile. “I made them. It’s my great-aunt’s recipe.”
“Olivia, I’ve seen your kitchen.”
Olivia huffed. “I made them yesterday at Gina’s house. Since I don’t know your mom’s style, I didn’t want to risk buying something she might not like. These are my go-to edible gift.”
Joss shook her head. Just when she thought she had Olivia figured out, she went and did something that took her completely by surprise. She’d just acknowledged how charming Olivia was; maybe she needed to adjust her expectations. “I see.”
“I’m Southern, Joss. I’m not going to show up as a guest at someone’s home and not bring a gift, especially if those someones are my girlfriend’s parents.”
Olivia made it sound so obvious. Joss would have laughed, but Olivia’s use of the word “girlfriend” had put a lump in her throat. It wasn’t that she hadn’t thought about Olivia in those terms, but hearing Olivia say it out loud made it feel official and serious all of a sudden. She wasn’t about to say that, though, so she picked up her keys. “That’s incredibly thoughtful. I’m sure my folks will love them.”
On the ride over, Olivia made Joss quiz her on family names and details. Joss ran through her family tree, assuring Olivia for the fifth time that there wasn’t going to be a test. When they pulled into the driveway, Joss put her hand on Olivia’s knee. “No pressure, but you’re likely to be the center of attention, at least for a little while.”
“I’m good. That debutante training comes in handy every now and then.” Olivia flipped her hair then climbed out of Joss’s truck.
Joss’s mom opened the door when they were halfway up the sidewalk. She took one of Olivia’s hands in both of her own. “Olivia. It’s so lovely to finally meet you. Thank you for coming.”
“Thank you so much for having me. Joss has told me so much about you, including what an amazing cook you are.”
“Is that so?” She raised an eyebrow playfully at Joss before pulling her into a hug. “We’ll have to see if I live up to the stories.”
Joss’s dad was standing in the doorway. He introduced himself to Olivia before giving Joss a kiss on the cheek. “Hi, Dad. What are you up to this weekend?”
“I was finishing up that potting shed your mother wants before the weather turns.”
“Why didn’t you call? You know I would have come over.”
He waved his hand back and forth. “Nonsense. You work hard all week long. Fred came over from next door and gave me a hand.”
“You work all week, too.”
“Bah. I don’t do any heavy lifting anymore, not like you and your brother. It’s fine. I know I can call on you when I need it.”
As they stepped into the living room, Ben emerged from the kitchen. Joss sent him a nod. “Olivia, you remember my brother, Ben.”
“Indeed I do. Good to see you, Ben.”
“Likewise. I hear the house is really shaping up.”
Olivia smiled at him. “It is. All the plumbing is done, and my bathroom is a dream.”
Joss interjected. “Kitchen cabinets have arrived. You can see the progress when you help me install them.”
Ben smiled. “I do love installing cabinetry.”
Olivia clasped her hands together. “And you can meet Pierre.”
“Who’s Pierre?”
Joss groaned inwardly. She liked Pierre just fine, but she hadn’t planned to bring him up at her parents’ house. While she fully supported animal rescue, there was something about a woman who knew nothing about farm animals adopting a goat when her house wasn’t even livable. Sure, she’d come to think of it as kind of charming, but what would her parents think? It was the kind of thing her mom would say indicated a person had more dollars than sense.
“He’s the goat I rescued. Didn’t Joss tell you? She spent a couple of days last week building a pen for him.”
Ben let out a small snort. “She didn’t mention it.”
Olivia beamed. “It’s a really nice pen, much nicer than what I would have designed for him.”
Joss’s mom chimed in. “Joss, that sounds like fun.”
“It sure does,” Ben said. “Joss, I can’t believe you’re branching out into farm work and haven’t shared the details.”
Joss was trying to think of a clever response when the front door swung open.
“Oma! Opa! We’re here!” Joss’s nieces came bounding through the door. When they caught sight of Joss, they ran right to her. “Aunt Joss!”
Olivia watched the two little girls whirl around the room, doling out hugs and kisses and enthusiastic hellos. At five and three, they both had a bit of baby fat left and both of them had a head full of light brown ringlets. The older one caught sight of Olivia. She walked over to Olivia, more slowly than she’d run around the room, but without hesitation.
She stuck out a small, chubby hand. “Hi. I’m Libby.”
Olivia bent down and shook the little hand. “Hello, Libby. I’m Olivia.”
Emboldened by her sister, the younger one started toward Olivia, but she stopped about halfway. Olivia smiled at her. “So you must be Anna. I’m very happy to meet you.”
Anna inched closer. She smacked Olivia’s palm in a way that was more like giving her five than a handshake, then ran to Daphne and stood behind her legs.
“She’s still a little shy,” Daphne said. “We’re working on it.”
Libby cut in. “She’s still a baby. When she’s five like me, she’ll be braver.”
Olivia looked down at Libby, who was decked out in a pair of denim overalls and a shirt with little strawberries all over it. “I’m sure she will, especially if her very brave older sister helps her along the way.”
“Libby, take your sister to the playroom. You can each pick out one toy to play with out here while the grownups visit.”
Libby stretched out her hand. Anna emerged from behind Daphne. She took her sister’s hand and the two of them went scurrying down the hallway. Olivia stood up and realized that a man, who must be Daphne’s husband, had joined them. She offered him a smile. “You must be Mark. I’m Olivia.”
“I am and it’s a pleasure to meet you. It’s nice to finally put a face with the name.”
Olivia wondered just how much she’d been the topic of conversation lately. She didn’t have long to wonder, however, as Ben turned the conversation back to her recent goat adoption. She explained how it wasn’t something she was planning, but she’d made the mistake of visiting the website of a local rescue group and she’d fallen hard for a sweet little Norwegian dwarf.
Libby, who was coloring at the coffee table and seemed not to be paying attention, perked up. “You have a goat? Can we meet him?” She turned to Daphne. “Can we, Mom?”
“Olivia’s very busy,” she said. “But maybe when she has time, we can go over for a visit.”
“I would love that,” Olivia said. “If you come after next week, he’ll have a friend, too.”
“A friend?” Ben asked.
“Goats are herd animals. They need companions to be happy.” Joss realized she was starting to sound as goat-crazy as Olivia.
Sandy, who’d disappeared into the kitchen, emerged. “Dinner is just about ready.”
“Oh, I almost forgot.” Olivia walked over to where she’d set down her purse and pulled out the bottle of wine and tin of pralines.
“What’s all this?” Sandy asked when Olivia handed them to her.
“Just a little thank you for your hospitality. The tin is pralines, my great-aunt’s recipe.”
“How lovely. You certainly didn’t need to go to the trouble, but we appreciate it. Don’t we, Frank?”
Frank took the tin and removed the lid. He plucked one out and took a bite. “We sure do.”
“Frank, we’re about to have dinner.” Sandy scowled, but there wasn’t much force behind it.
“I’m appreciating.” He looked at Olivia with a smile and wiggled his eyebrows.
Olivia laughed, in part because she couldn’t even imagine her parents bantering like that. Sandy took the tin back and put the lid on. “The rest of you will have to wait until after the meal.”
They moved to the table, where Olivia was seated between Joss and Ben. There was a brief pause before eating for Frank to say grace and then the dishes were passed around family-style. There was a beautiful pork roast that looked like it had been lovingly braised for hours. Bowls overflowed with vegetables, including roasted carrots, sautéed cabbage, and green beans with bacon. But the real star, at least in Olivia’s mind, were the homemade noodles; they were tender and rich, tossed in a mixture of brown butter and herbs.
Although there were only nine at the table, it felt like there were at least three conversations going on at any one time. Olivia gave up trying to follow all of them, instead allowing herself to be pulled from one to another. There was no formality, but lots of laughter. After everyone ate, Olivia wasn’t allowed to help with the dishes, so she lingered with Sandy in the dining room. It was clear that Joss, Ben, and Daphne had an easy rhythm born of years of shared chores.
There was a little bit of visiting after the dinner, but Daphne and Mark decided to leave so the girls could nap in their own beds. Ben wanted to take advantage of the good weather to get his lawn mowed. Joss took the lead in excusing them as well.
“Do you teach every day?” Frank asked.
“I do this semester. It’s probably a good thing, since being on campus forces me to go to my office and I get other work done. When I’m home, all I want to do is work on the house.”
Joss smiled. “Or play with your goat.”
Olivia shrugged and wiggled her eyebrows. “That, too.”
“It was so lovely to spend the afternoon with you,” Sandy said. “We hope you’ll come again.”
“It would be a pleasure. I’d love to have you both over as well, just as soon as I have a stove.”
Both Sandy and Frank laughed. And when they hugged Joss good-bye, they hugged Olivia as well. It was a real hug, too, and it made her feel like she’d passed an unspoken test.
On the drive back to her house, Olivia realized she had a slight stomachache, although she couldn’t decide if it was from eating too much or laughing too hard. She also couldn’t remember the last time she’d had a family day. No, that wasn’t accurate. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had a family day and it had been so much fun. Joss’s parents were warm and laid back. Her siblings teased her mercilessly, but with an affection that Olivia and her sister had never shared. Then there were the kids. Daphne and Mark’s daughters were boisterous and sweet; within minutes of being introduced, they asked Olivia to play and treated her like a long lost member of the family.
The whole day made her feel even more connected to Joss. It also made her feel a certain longing, not for her family so much as how she wished her family was. She’d always had a vague sense of what she was missing, but spending time with the Bauers brought it into sharp focus.
“Was it too much?”
Olivia looked over at Joss. “What?”
“The dinner, the kids, the loud siblings. Was it too much for you?” Joss knew her family could be overwhelming. She loved it, but it wasn’t for everyone. She’d told herself this wasn’t a test—of Olivia or their relationship—but she knew deep down it was. Family was too important for it not to be.
“Not at all. I had a great time.”
“Really?” Joss wanted to believe her, but she could sense something under the surface, something Olivia wasn’t saying.
“I do. What makes you think I didn’t?”
“You’ve gotten awfully quiet. I wondered if maybe you were a little shell-shocked. They can be a handful.”
Olivia smiled. “If I am, it’s in a good way. I was actually thinking about how much fun I had, and how different that is from spending time with my family.”
That’s what Joss had been afraid of. To hear Olivia say it, however, made Joss think the opposite of what she’d feared might be true. “How so?”
Olivia seemed to choose her words carefully. “My family likes to spend time together doing things that are expensive, or in locations that are expensive. If other people can see us enjoying expensive things and places, even better.”
Joss mulled over Olivia’s statement. It wasn’t like she didn’t think about money, about places she’d like to see and experiences she’d like to have. They were often things she’d like to do with her family, too, but she got the distinct impression that wasn’t what Olivia meant. Still, she didn’t want to come across as judgmental. “That’s not necessarily a bad thing, is it?”
Olivia sighed. “It’s not. It’s just…It’s just the focus seems to be more on doing something or being somewhere nice than it does on spending time together. Does that make sense?”
“It does.”
“When I was a teenager, I figured I’d be the black sheep of my family because I was gay.”
“And?”
“And it did cause tensions at first. But when I started dating a medical student from an old-money Atlanta family while I was in grad school, things seemed to smooth over quite nicely.”
Joss shook her head. She’d had her own nervousness over coming out to her parents, to her brother and sister. It turned out they’d all figured as much from the time Joss had been in middle school. It was a relief for everyone to get it out in the open and had been a non-issue ever since. “So what happened?”
“She did her residency in cardiology while I finished my dissertation. She and my mother reserved the venue for our wedding before she even proposed.”
“Are you serious?”
“Sadly, yes. I was on the job market, but I think she, and my parents, figured I’d give that up once she was in practice.”
It was a strange concept for Joss to wrap her head around. She found it both fascinating and sad. “And do what?”
“Maybe teach at a private school or a local college, but mostly be her wife. Being a society wife can be a full-time job, especially if you throw in a bit of charity work for good measure.”
It was like the 1950s had never ended. Regardless of her first impressions of Olivia, Joss couldn’t imagine her in that lifestyle. Joss didn’t know too much about Olivia’s work, but she knew how important it was to her. And, as she’d discovered, Olivia liked getting her hands dirty. Being someone’s trophy—even if it was a successful lesbian doctor—boggled her mind. “So, how did you get from there to here?”
“I applied for about twenty positions and interviewed at six universities. Cornell was definitely the most prestigious. Most schools were hiring for American lit, but Cornell actually wanted someone who specialized in Southern writers or women writers. I do both. Plus, I think the chair of the search committee had a soft spot for Eudora Welty. I just happened to have done my dissertation on Welty’s work and influence on twentieth-century Southern literature.”
“Wow. So you were prepared to go anywhere that offered you a job?”
“Just about. I applied mostly to places on the East Coast, nowhere too conservative. It’s kind of how academe works.”
Joss thought about her ex, Cora. When she’d been offered the fellowship, it never occurred to her not to take it. At the time, Joss had called her selfish and short-sighted. Now, talking with Olivia, Joss realized that maybe she’d not given enough consideration to how the system worked. Even if she didn’t like it, she could at least understand that the job options looked different than in her line of work.
Joss pulled into Olivia’s driveway and shut off the engine. “Well, I’m glad that you landed here.”
Olivia looked at her and smiled. “Me, too.”