Chapter 8
Summary and Reflection

Forgiveness is the fire extinguisher that douses the flames of strife that might otherwise consume our lives and destroy our relationships. Learning to forgive quickly is a key to battling strife. Paul writes, “Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has [freely] forgiven you, so must you also [forgive]” (Col. 3:13).

1. Based on what you read in this chapter, why is forgiveness important? In what ways does it benefit us to forgive quickly?

2. Are there people in your life that you may need to forgive? Who are they, and what is their offense toward you? Keep in mind that if the thought of a particular person makes your blood boil, that is a good indication that you are harboring unforgiveness toward that person.

3. How would forgiving these people change your life and your relationships?

4. Although we may deny it, many of us are angry with God. We were created to receive love from God and to respond with our love to Him. Yet the root of many of our emotional problems stems from hidden or repressed anger toward God. This anger is also the cause of a bitter attitude toward life. Prayerfully ask the Holy Spirit to show you any hidden anger or hurt toward God you have buried deep inside. In your journal, write down what the Holy Spirit reveals to you about how you feel toward God.

5. Every time we are hurt, offended, disappointed, or even devastated—and there are many such times in our lives—we must choose how we will respond. Write about a time when you chose to hold on to anger and resentment. In what ways was this a choice for “death”? In your journal, now write about a time when you chose forgiveness. In what ways was this a choice for life?

6. Can you give God your hurt, your anger, your disappointment, and your sense of betrayal toward others and toward Him? Will you choose to trust Him for His justice? In your journal, write a prayer turning your feelings and these relationships over to God and expressing your commitment to make forgiveness a lifestyle.

Dear Lord, I trust You for Your justice in my life. I choose right now to let go of my need to seek justice for myself. I forgive everyone who has offended me, including [speak out their names]. I release them right now in the name of Jesus. I submit my life to You today, all over again. I don’t understand all of the circumstances of my life, and perhaps I never will while I live on this earth. Lord, even though it is hard to choose to trust You at times, even though I do not fully understand, I submit my life to You. I thank You for loving me and keeping me until that day when I’ll fully know as I am fully known—just as the Bible says in 1 Corinthians 13:12.